"Fighting for a new day"

Fighting for a new day

Stop being such a weak sissy boy,
I say in the mirror grinning at myself deviously.
Screaming and throwing something just doesn't help me anymore,
I need bigger things to happen.
Bending steel and making these families cry over insignificant trivial things.
More walls are being built around me,
My heart has become hardened.
I'm not so easy to get into,
Even though it takes me seconds to penetrate you.
That's the old me talking you into it.
Feels like I'm choking myself out of the life I live,
Hating this face and telling lies.....to no one but myself.
Reshaping my life into something I want more.
I gave into the bastard that speaks to me,
And had to do something about it.
Easy for you to say this will get better,
You don't have to look into MY mirror every day.
Weakness has me by the throat,
Close enough to taste it.
Not changing a thing really,
The days go by unending and relentless.
These hands are clawing for you,
Trying to climb out of the grave I dug for myself.
I can't take this pressure anymore,
Head's going to explode and the silence has gotten me know where.
I've taken care of everything up to this point,
I can't carry you home anymore....I'm too weak.
Wake me when you've found another life to squeeze.
All that is left for me is a new leaf,
Another day is a new day.
Every which way you look at it,
You make it what it is.
So keeping my head up and my chin high,
A smile on my face and my fists tightly held.
I stare to the future in front of me,
Fighting for what I'm going to have in my life.
Making it MY life, making it a peaceful one because for these past years it's been a fight.
Over and over I say when I awake,
This is a new day and fight for what you want, you shall get what you deserve.

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• poetry
• fighting
• new
• day