Till Summer Comes Around Chapter 16

Till Summer Comes Around

Chapter Sixteen

I stood looking out the kitchen window my hands resting on the sink in front of me.

It was raining again and it was suppose to for several more days.

The rain made a gentle soft noise against the glass as I stood there starring out it.

I had been married and become a widow in less then 24 hours and I hated it.
James had come back, I had spent three weeks falling more and more in love with him and now he was gone.
Really gone, he wasn't coming back next summer he was gone forever.

I felt like a idiot for breaking down on the bridge. Why had I opened up to a complete stranger?
Why had I not been able to just keep my brave soldier routine? I wanted to be left alone, I didn't want to be asked if I was okay everyday. After all it didn't feel like I was okay.
I can't make it through one day without breaking down, but at least I saved if for when I was alone.

Everyone pretended to understand me but how could they?
Everything outside the window had gone out of focus as I was lost in my thoughts. The rain and the beach came back into view and I moved away from the window. Why was Matt here? As if I didn't have enough reminders of James everyday. His clothes were in my closet, his razor and shampoo in my shower, his ring on my finger! I did not need some one who at a glance made me think James was standing here, some one who claimed to understand and know how I feel. No one knows...nobodys seems to understand the facts.

The fact that James was here because of me, James had come back for me, James had stayed an extra two weeks because of me, James had been driving on that road because of me! Nobody seemed to point any of that out.
James knew inside I was here still waiting for him to come, if I hadn't been he wouldn't of come.

There was knock on the door and I ran my hands through my hair and wiped my face. I knew if was Johnny, Abagail, or I guess it could be Matt, and I didn't want to give any of them a reason to stay. Check on me make yourself feel better but then just leave...please.

I opened the door and saw Matt standing there, I stepped aside as he walked in. I shut the door and folded my arms across my chest and looked at him.

"Man it's just pouring!" he said taking off his wet jacket "Does it always do that here?" he asked and I just stared at him

"Why are you here?" I asked

"I told you that on the bridge" he said almost amused

"No I mean seriously why are you here? Johnny's here because we dated for a long time, he knows all about me and James and for some reason he feels the need to look after me, and he still thinks were meant to be, Abagails here because she's my best friend, and it's how she is, she wouldn't leave me alone if I told her I hated her...my sister drives down every weekend because hey I'm still the baby girl of the family and then theres you, I met you once, you don't even know me and yes James was your brother but why your here with me thats what I want to know"

Matt let out a big sigh and took a hesitant step forward.

"James loved you, with all his heart and the guy couldn't move on to save his life. You say I don't know you but oh trust me I know you, I know everything about you, James would never shut up about it" he smiled as he said the last part and he looked down.

"I wouldn't of come down here unless I thought it was absolutely necessary, I want you to come to New York with me for the memorial. I think it's kind of important your there and I think that you need to meet my parents, after all your going to have there grandchild and there going to want to help"

"I don't need any more help" I said

"You say that but you know you do, and I think you should stay in New York for awhile... my parents own a huge apartment downtown and James kinda lived there they said its yours, and I know that probably sounds crazy right now but I think James would want you to get back to normal and-"

"Normal? How can I get back to normal in a huge city I've never been too, away from my town my friends my home?"

"Listen tomorrow a plane leaves here for New York and I'm going to be on it, I think you owe James to be there at his memorial okay?" he said handing me an envelope "At least think about it okay?" he said opening the door and walking out. I opened the envelope and saw the plane ticket. Going to James memorial never even crossed my mind. It was in New York and I could never afford that. I glanced at the ticket... New York...

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