The 12 Stages of Deployment

The 6 month mark had been reached. The scotch had been tippled. Deployment, a 2yearold, a newbaby and the looming holiday season = a new Christmas carol for the military spouse.
In the first stage of deployment my true love said to me...

I miss you and you miss me
In the second stage of deployment my true love said to me...
Chocolate's not a food group (it is when you're deployed)
In the third stage of deployment my true love said to me...
Buy something pretty (don't have to ask me twice)
In the forth stage of deployment my true love said to me...
I think we've been extended
In the fifth stage of deployment I called up my true love...
I just had your baby!
In the sixth stage of deployment my true love said to me...
Don't believe the president (...)
In the seventh stage of deployment my true love said to me...
Wine's not a food group either (my food pyramid disagrees with you)
In the eighth stage of deployment my true love said to me...
Stop spending money! (Just try and stop me)
In the ninth stage of deployment my true love said to me...
Are you renovating? (I always do when you are gone)
In the tenth stage of deployment my true love said to me...
Where are my model airplanes? (packed up in the garage, where hey should be)
In the eleventh stage of deployment my true love said to me...
You should shave your legs now (ha ha ha ha ha)
In the twelfth stage of deployment... if ever that day comes...
Voulez vous coucher avec moi ce soir? (Yes please)


HA! COPYRIGHT 2011: MARY CLARITY Except that bit I took from Lady Marmalade. Respect the puked-upon mother.

Category:

Comedy

Tags:

• Military Deployment
• Military
• Wife

[TheMaryclarity]

Lyrics are posted under the description! Thanks for all the great comments...nobody ever goes through this alone :)

[cathrynvideos]

At first it made me laugh, then it made me cry, then it made me smile, because it's all so true. Thanks for doing this for all of us! You're not alone, and you've reminded me that neither am I :) -Cathi (husband leaves in 4 weeks for an 18 month long separation and deployment)



[TheMaryclarity]

@cathrynvideos

Thanks Cathi! Good luck for the next big hump...I did this as a joke for my husband and it has turned out to be good for ME because of all the feedback. Everyone seems to go through the same things regardless of branch of service/job/length of deployment...I hope you find a great support network in your area and you are able to laugh more than you cry!

[orzeck]

This is beautiful, witty and broke my heart. I was you 2 years ago. I had a two year old, pregnant and hubby deployed. Thank you for showing the world how strong we are during deployments! God bless you and your family. Thank you, hubby and your family for your service and sacrifices! From one military wife to another! :)

[ashleericky]

Awsome!!!

We are at five months down and who knows how many more to go.I had to just laugh insted of cry when the President announced all troops in Iraq will be home .. Not gonna happen for us :/

Happy Holidays..

[geminitropicofcancer]

This is resiliency in action! Bravo!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[bec2006abc]

Mary: I have a Christmas story that involves YOU! On the day I discovered your video, I cut & pasted the link to it on to my FB Wall. Also that day, I got an email from my parents asking what I wanted for Christmas. I THOUGHT I pasted a link to a book I wanted, but instead, I accidentally sent them the link to your video. They watched the video TWICE to figure out what I wanted and sent me an email saying, "Funny, but WHAT do you want?" I clarified...but I got...the book & antlers! HAHA!!!

[yrusam2]

Love it. Laughed, smiled. A tear in my eye. Hoping rest of our deployment goes by quickly!

[1stcavhhbn]

You are AWESOME!!  Love your humor and wit ~ keep up your great attitude! You did forget one thing....coffee....coffee is another food group, coffee, chocolate & wine - the only 3 food groups you need during deployment. ;o) Only 4 months to go here.....

[debthemakeupnoob]

This is awesome! I'm impressed that you got this in one take! I would have had to edit the heck out of it. I can relate to the majority of these. Good job <3 ((military spouse hugs))

[26Breann]

wonderful! going though deployment right now thanks sooo funny :)

[PirateBug59]

@MrsMKP You prove the point that we military spouses sure don't fit in a cookie cutter. :) All of our situations, relationships, etc are so very unique, yet we're all thrown into a similar situation. Best of luck!

[MrsMKP]

This is funny. But we don't have children as we cannot have them, (like most milspouses become pregnant before deployment, during mid tour leave or right after deployment) we have had to deal with 6 yrs of infertility struggles & 2 pregnancy losses (how is that fair?). And I try to stay away from chocolate & the wine during deployment as I am losing weight and getting back into shape. Not spending his money either as I earn my own, and we are saving/paying off bills. So those don't apply to me.

[k10barnes]

Wine and chocolate are the only food groups during deployment!