Inside Ursula Hitler's Head 47: Invasion of the Posh Spice Zombies, THE THRILLING CONCLUSION!

In the final chapter, Sweetie confronts the Posh Spice Zombie queen... And her own self-esteem issues.

Sweetie: Hello. Is anybody seeing this? For all I know, the Posh Spice zombies have taken over the entire internet by now. I'm the only one left on Xtranormal who hasn't become a zombie. For some reason, I'm immune to the virus. For days, I've been on the run from an army of scrawny women in overpriced dresses. And now I just can't run anymore, I'm too tired. They'll find me soon, and feast on my brain. Either that, or they'll drive me insane forever with their endless cries of zigga-zigga and girl power. I haven't seen Meany for days.There are billions of Posh Spices out there, and he could be any one of them. If Meany was here, he's think up a way to save us. I know he would. I can't save anybody. I'm just a cartoon party girl, I can't fight fucking zombies... Meany, I miss you so much. I miss your snooty accent, and your big basketball head. Now you're gone forever, I never even told you how much I...

Meany: How much you what?

Sweetie: Meany! Is that really you?

Meany: Yes, Sweetie. It's really me. I'm back.

Sweetie: Oh, my God! This can't be real. The zombies must be eating my brain, and this is just a hallucination before I go to cartoon heaven.

Meany: Sweetie, being a Posh isn't like you think it is at all. We could all turn back into the people we used to be anytime, but we just don't want to. We're all fabulous and sexy. Nobody is ugly. Nobody is lonely. Please, Sweetie... Join us.

Sweetie: Oh, Meany... I'm just so tired. I don't know what to think.

Meany: I love you, Sweetie. I want us to be together forever.

Sweetie: You lost me at "I love you." The real Meany is way too chicken-shit to ever tell me that.

Meany: Sweetie, listen...

Sweetie: Stop it! Stop using my friend's face to try to sell me your bullshit!

Meany: (In Posh's voice.) Very well. (He transforms into a Posh... But not just any Posh. This is the Posh Queen.) I'm the Posh who infected Meany. I'm the mother of all the Posh Spice Zombies.

Sweetie: So... The queen bitch, herself.

Posh Queen: We wished for you to join us willingly... But if not, we will make a tasty snack of your brains.

Sweetie: Yeah, probably. But before you skanks kill me, I got one last idea I gotta try. Ursula said to defeat you, I need to find the Anti-Posh. I didn't know what she meant, but today I finally thought of something. It's pretty goofy, but it's all I got. Computer, play track 1, maximum volume. Now, stick out your can... Here comes the garbage man.

(The Cramps' "I'm Cramped" begins to play.)

Posh Queen: What is that sound? Make it stop! It burns!

(Montage of all the Poshes changing back into the people they used to be, including Mr. Meany. Finally, the Posh Queen herself crumbles away into a little cloud of pixels.)

Sweetie: Wow. Not bad for a cartoon party girl.

(Later, Sweetie and Meany are back in their dorm room.)

Meany: So, the lead singer of the Cramps was the Anti-Posh?

Sweetie: Yup. The late, great Lux Interior - the human fly, the garbage man, the teenage goo-goo muck. He was a patron saint to fuck-ups and misfits everywhere, and he was everything that Posh Spice isn't.

Meany: But I still don't understand... How come the Poshes couldn't turn you into one of them?

Sweetie: I've been thinking about that. I'm silly and self-obsessed. I love fashion and shopping and all kinds of shit that I know doesn't really matter. Maybe trying to give me the Posh Spice virus was like trying to give a cold to a flu. Maybe I was immune because I was too much like them already.

Meany: (Considers.) Or maybe you were immune because you're so absolutely, incorruptibly yourself.

(There is a long pause.)

Sweetie: I wish we were programmed to hug.

Meany: Bite me.

(THE END... But then, we cut to back outside, where Skeeter, the boy from the previous episode, talks to the audience.)

Skeeter: So, folks, as you can see, everything worked out fine.

A Mysterious Black Lady in Dance Gear: Hello...

Skeeter: Hello. Who are you?

MBLIDG: I'm Scary Spice, from the Spice Girls... Do you want to see my panties? Everybody wants to see Scary Spice's panties.

(THE END..?)

Category:

Comedy

Tags:

• xtranormal
• ursula
• hitler
• sweetie
• meany
• transformation
• TF
• tranny
• transgender
• age
• regression
• AR
• Posh
• Spice
• panties
• cramps
• lux
• interior

[ClashCityRockers0]

Kudos for putting Lux in!!! RIP

[MsUrsulaHitler]

Thanks!

[ClashCityRockers0]

He's a real hero. I'm not sure how many people would "get" this unless they knew him though, unfortunately...

[MsUrsulaHitler]

Well, my thinking was that even if you don't know the band well, the song we hear in the clip would give you some idea what the band was like. I'll admit that the Lux tribute kinda comes out of nowhere in the story, but... I was trying to think of what an anti-Posh would be, and Lux was the first person who came to mind.

[7NullSeven]

W00t! Great ending, Ursula!

[MsUrsulaHitler]

Oh, I meant to say thank you!

[gueydude]

i meant 0:41

[gueydude]

cant fight f@*!%#g zombies 0:43

[MmeLEnfer]

This was such a good show... we love you Lux <3

[KedViper]

I love the Cramps.

[AlterEgoTrip]

ah Lux Interiour...I love the ending. You are younger than I am, but you seem to like much of the same music I do :D

[plantyjuicequeen]

LOL LOL GREAT JOB BUT LOL

[litigants]

I LOVE THIS VIDEOOO.

[cjme1]

maybe... ANTI SPICE!!!!!!

[mcasual]

well it's a wrap, it was probably funny for people in your real life, watching you try and try and try to think what could be the antiposh for days :)