Dissociative Identity Disorder: Donna Williams, aged 12, switching video 2

I was diagnosed with (Dissociative Identity Disorder) DID in 2010 in addition to my autism. I made this slide show from stills from video footage from when I was 12 years old in 1976. The footage was so fast you get more time to watch it this way. I made it as part of my own struggles in coming to terms with DID.

It appears we were picking grass, being solitary. We've been interrupted, Willie appears displeased. "He" gives a 'back off' look then we return to picking grass. Aware the camera is still watching, we sneak a peek. At that point we switch to Carol who gives a compliant 'pleaser' smile, the we switch to comedic Da who gives a 'come on you guys, gimme a break' pressed smile then Anne, one of our shyest appears to be there, unable to look. Someone looks back, still finding us watched by the camera. Our protector, Willie, gets up and strides away.

There's a sweet young boy who looked hopeful to play ball but ends up standing there with no takers. Essentially I'm already interacting with my team, the camera is already an interloper and this little boy doesn't stand a chance in the chaos.

Switching is not at all always this fast, possibly why those with DID seem simply to be different people on different days, weeks, sometimes hours. But switching can happen in seconds as several alters compete for which is going to present in the body. Each will have a different take on what they've found themselves in. When switching is this fast this is probably why nobody has any sense of being there that day... because there was no continuous sense of time for any one of the alters. We all remember the trousers and the jacket but no memory at all of the day.

Diagnostic background:

I was born in 1963 and had immune deficiencies since 6 mths old. In 1965, aged 2, I was diagnosed as psychotic in a 3 day hospital assessment.

I grew up with some of my selves becoming echolalic, others with Selective Mutism. Labeled emotionally disturbed by primary school, I was diagnosed with language processing disorder in late childhood around 1972 and one of my selves acquired functional speech by age 9-11 progressively paving the way for all to eventually have functional speech.

At 23, around 1986, I was diagnosed with Atypical Epilepsy after having fugues then diagnosed with autism in 1990. I was treated for PTSD for four years in my 30s and diagnosed with DID in 2010.

One year into therapy for DID my Core Self became present full time in the body and after considerable effort began to overcome extreme fear of speech and a marked stammer which had left me believing I was non-verbal I began to speak to people. My team of 9 human alters (all of whom are 'autistic' in different ways), 3 animal alters and 1 object alter (in addition to me as the Core Self) are on the road toward integration.

Thank you for stopping by.

Donna
(Core Self in a team of 13 that includes Katrina, Willie, Anne (branch 1), Esby, Marnie (branch 2), Foosh, Ning, Opie, Polly Carol, Da, Rose (branch 3) and Addie.

My full journey can be found at http://www.donnawilliams.net
including my consultation page for DID where I offer online Peer Support

Category:

Education

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• dissociative
• identity
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• switching
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• mpd
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