Maddy Mann's Sign Language Serenade to Avril Lavigne

Hi everyone. So, I totally was crushing on my neighbor last year. In my defense, the Bible told me to. All that, "Love your neighbor stuff." But, hello, it's super easy to love your neighbor when your neighbor is James Metternich! James is tall and blond, he's got the most gorgeous blue eyes and these devilish lips. He plays lacrosse AND hes a swimmer. Hello! He's so everything. Oh, he's also deaf. But he reads lips and he talks just fine. So not a hindrance to my totally crushing on him. No. The hindrance was his girlfriend of two years, Lisa.

Nonetheless, James and I totally hit it off. But Lisa was always around. SO I decided it was time to take matters into my own hands and win his affections the only way I know how, by staging a production number. I had my grandmother teach me some sign language (she's deaf.) And I worked up this number. I then casually suggested to James that he take Lisa to Kafka & Coffee, this cute little coffee shop downtown. Well, you can imagine their surprise when I hopped on the stage to do my routine.

Now, you know how in the music video Avril ends up in a bathroom stall making out with the guy? That didn't happen. James didn't say anything and Lisa said some things with her hands that would make Jesus cry. A month later the Metternichs moved back to his old neighborhood. His mother told my mother that they wanted him in a more deaf-intensive environment. Shortly after that my house got toilet papered. I know it was Lisa and her friends. Seriously. It was crazy too 'cause I was home. I mean, do deaf people know when they're being quiet?

Whatever. My grandmother saw the performance and she thought I was a superstar. Guess there'll be other cute "boys next door." Until then... go with God. xo

Category:

Comedy

Tags:

• Gay
• comedy
• drag
• performance
• Catholic
• school
• girl
• schoolgirl
• Ryan
• Migge
• Broadway
• nyc
• theater
• queer
• New
• York
• city
• Brooklyn
• fabulous
• Avril
• Lavigne
• Girlfriend

[Absterish]

Actually, your reasoning is totally not in line with the Bible... sorry, hun.

[MaddyMannSUPERSTAR]

@Absterish Maybe you'll find my other Bible Storyz more in line with the Good Book! xoxo

[tapdancegirl88]

where's your tap shoes

[MaddyMannSUPERSTAR]

Tap AND sign language! Now that would be talent! Goodness.

[LaMiniAvril]

hahahaha it's stupid but i loved it!!

[Taina15]

LOL you act soo crazy!

I'm deaf and I sign in ASL real good but the way you sign language are making me laugh with your expressions lmao xD

[dzhei]

Great show! Good job!;)))

[txcheer61]

freaking awesome!!! lol

[Frenchbabex]

Lol.

[Sashadigsweed]

Lol, Awesome. Love the history with it too. I so can relate to it. I've kinda been there done it too.