Listen here Hagrid you FAT OAF! I'm not a FUCKING WIZARD!
- For god's sake Harry, what is with this language?! You're a FUCKING WIZARD.
I don't give a FUCK you FAT HAIRY BASTARD! I'm not a FUCKING WIZARD!
- Listen Harry, you're going to go to Hogwarts and do SPELLS and SHIT. And you're going to be FUCKING pleased about it!
I don't WANT to do your FUCKING spells you BASKET CASE! stick it up your fucking DICK-HOLE!
- My fucking WHAT?!?!
HAGRID, y'er pushing me over the FUCKING line!
- No I'm not. You - are a wizard! You're going to go to Hogwarts, you're going to do spells, you'll get a wand, you'll get a fucking owl, it'll deliver your mail - DEAL WITH IT. YA TWAT.
I'M GOING TO FUCKING PUT MY DICK IN THE OWL
- I did that when I was younger, and that was a bad move. You, are a wizard.
I'm a WHAT?!
- YOU'RE A WIZARD HARRY, FOR FUCK SAKE, LISTEN TO MEH!
Hagrid I've been through this I don't give a BLOODY FUCK WHAT YOU THINK.
- This is NOT negotiable! You come with me you SPECCY BOWL-HAIRED CUT FUCK SMALL DICK SKINNY CUNT EAT MORE WANKER
I'LL FUCKING SET YER BEARD ON FIRE!
- 'MON THEN YA LITTLE SPECCY CUNT, SQUARE-GO LIKE
I'LL FUCKING BURST YE'
- Right you, you little wank stain. If you don't get your act together, I'm gonna drag you to hogwarts. You'll get a wand, you'll get an owl that'll deliver your SHITEY meal and that'll be that and you'll enjoy it ya' sch-ch-ff-chhssh-chinky.
I'll fucking NAW yer ARM off, Hagrid!
- Listen you, get near my arm and I'll slap you across the face like a little BITCH
I'll PUMP ye' SILLY.
- C'MON THEN YA CUNT
SUCK MAH PIXIE DICK YA CHUBBY COON
- I'll RUPTURE YOUR FUCKING ANUS WITH MAH MASSIVE BEAR COCK
I'll RIP YER GIANT DICK OFF AND BASH YE ACROSS THE JAW WITH IT
- LET'S GO RIGHT NOW BRING IT ON YA LITTLE WANK
-------------------- Thanks to mr-kaki (facepunch) for the transcribe. --------------------