if i suppose that god stole all my ideas before i could ever form them, is this then my idea or god's? because if it is (and i am correct), then i could never anticipate this understanding; but if it's not (i.e. god didn't steal all my ideas), then i thought of something before god did--unless i am one of god's ideas, in which case i am playing host to my own confusion... so, maybe i don't exist, i just think i do; a passing fancy, belonging to absolutely nothing and having no meaning of my own to discover.

that's it. god must be in the advanced stages of dementia--if i'm her lost idea, a shadow of something that isn't there--only remotely conscious of myself.

soul-chilling, isn't it. i'm a cosmic bad memory.

time to go and finish the forgetting,
the one thing until now i could never
remember.