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The trailer for the new film kill list.

Tragedy was narrowly averted when a stray bullet bound for singer Beyonce thankfully struck and became lodged in a passerby.

Time Magazine's eagerly anticipated annual list of the 299 million least influential Americans hits newsstands this week.

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The Department of Transportation reports gridlock can be eliminated by simply honking your car's horn.

More coverage at: http://onion.com

New security measures put in place to allay terror fears are threatening to drive suspicious package retailers out of business.

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In this Onion News Network special feature, our soldiers stationed abroad remind us there's still a war going on.

More coverage at: http://onion.com

Girls between the ages of 8 and 14 spent the day helping their parents fight insurgents and defuse mines.

More coverage at: http://onion.com

dot worry guys this is fake..this is just news parody;) i love u justin bieber..

lolz

At a press conference today, the AGU announced it will not even acknowledge Mike Greenman until he begins dressing better and loses some weight.