God damn I'm great. I like to crank up fuckin Molly Hatchet when I cruise in my Trans Am. I stop at the tavern and slam about 10 Jager Bombs then pick a fight with a guy much smaller than myself and waste him of course. After that I like to go home and take my girlfriend up the shitter. She likes that. Not so much when I make her suck on it afterwards though. But sometimes when I get a little out of line I just punch myself right in the fuckin cock. Drop me a text if you want to party or do a train on your woman.

Deed's I'm Most Proud Of:

4 Time MulletsGallore.com world Invitational Champion. 2003-04-05 and 2007-- Aggressive Hot-Rod Mullet Division.

At a Green Bay Packers game, I drank 33 Pabst's, 15 Jager Bombs, slurped 25 Jello shots, and smoked 3 Fatty's and still drove back to Milwaukee that night.

Single handed, I beat the living shit out of a group of 15 Rockabilly Bull Dyke's marching in a Queer rally in my beloved stomping ground. I consider this my finest hour.

I did 5 years hard time at Joliet for rape, assault, arson, and rape. I know I said rape twice but that's because I like rape.