About this user
Alright, now this is serious shit folks. I have recently experienced quite a revelation. My wife was being really bitchy a few month ago... which was a shock. (of course.... because she's never bitchy which is the truth.... I mean, uh... I LOVE YOU HONEY!!!..... well I'm screwed) Anyways, shit was changing. Our sex wasn't as hot and steamy as it used to be, and she was barely ever around during the day. I thought she was cheating on me, but after a very loud and unpleasant argument, turned out she was just pregnant. Now I was ecstatic to hear this amazing news, and it's even better because it's my kid! Just sayin', if it was someone else's kid, I obviously wouldn't be quite as happy.
Anyways, now I've been starting to rethink my life a little bit. Let's just get one thing straight here, I AM NEVER GIVING UP WEED!!!!! (hear that honey! SUCK IT YOU FAT BITCH!!!!!) just kidding baby, you know I love your sexy belly. Seriously, pregnant chicks turn me on. Especially one's carrying my child! Yay! Alrighty, back to what I was sayin'. I love weed too much to give it up. My wife stopped tokin' a while ago for the baby, which is good, cause I don't want no dumb bitch baby, or a baby thats born with cancer or some shit. But yeah, I aint giving up the cannabis reefer for a long while. Also, I've recently started taking up the acoustic guitar. I heard that if you play music to a baby at an early age, it helps their brain develop. So, I've taken it ONE STEP OVER THE MOTHAFUCKIN EDGE!!! I've been blasting some Zep, Beetles, and other kickass music into my wife's uterus, so the baby is one step ahead. I've also been playing some smooth acoustic for the fetus. (Yes, it's not a baby yet, so all you catholic fucks out there should scrape the sand out of your vaginas and get back to fucking reality!! Pro-choice, bitches!!) Plus, my wife gets all horny when I play the guitar, makin' for some nice pregnant lovin'!
Alright, other than the fetus my beloved wife is currently carrying, I have some other big news. I'll be making the name Milkyjizzflinger into a name known across the fucking world!!! I've recently joined a supergroup, where we will play death metal about our lord and saviour, Jesus Christ. It's pretty farfetched, I know, but we have something going for us here. It's not strictly/really death metal, but it just adds to the overall hilarity of the situation, you know? I'm still working as a mechanical engineer, but I've taken a year's maternity leave, which began just last week! So I have until that fucking baby is born (in January) to make a multi-platinum selling album. Hmmmmm.... yeah, I think I can do it!
Or, what will probably happen is that I'll just smoke a bunch o' weed, screw around with the band and make some decent music for fun, and in about 7 months, I'll get a call to rush my wife to the hospital because a baby is popping out of her snatch. That all sounds like fun to me!!!
Age
29
Hometown
Halifax
Country
Canada
Occupation
I am a mechanical engineer. I make a lot of money. What the fuck have you done lately? (currently on maternity leave, bitches!!!!)
Companies
Stelco
Schools
Mc Master
Interests
I've been playing the acoustic guitar, it's quite pleasant. The fetus loves it!!!
I enjoy weed thoroughly. It is the bee's knees. It's just great!
What else... I like messin with people. it's too funny.
I like weed...did I mention that?
uhhhhh... thats it for now
milkyjizzflinger
commented:
fuckin racist