infoandexpression's channel

Kristen Stewart as Joan Jett in The Runaways, the movie. <3

OH SHIT. Everyone still thinks he's abusive. I don't even know if he is. We talked about it and both apologized. People have faults and if he admitted to them... DAMN IT BRAIN. It could happen again, but. Maybe our communication will be better by then.

'OH NO I am giddy for no apparent reason - quick, counter the random introspective smile with pensiveness.' I admit to my flaws (though sometimes lack the insight into them at first or see them where they don't exist) and try to change them. I can make any relationship work if the decision is mutual. I am willing to do the work. - My new mantra.

How should you act when you realize every moment is fragile? What about personal roles - they're just social constructs, not fundamentally existing.People never used to work with strangers for strangers. What is the role of stranger? Hostile enemy or a person to treat like a friend? Creating enemies is creating unnecessary misery. I can never play roles, I just know how to be myself and what behaviors I think are appropriate: attentiveness, understanding.

I jump head first into serious relationships not realizing they're transient like everything else. Maybe this is how they start to crumble, on my end. The comfort is just so sweet that I cling to it relentlessly. Truth be told it could end at any second, just like your life could. Wish for each other to be happy, give them the sort of freedoms they need, learn to communicate through arguments. And I think you (I) can make it work. The damn communication stumps me.

Male aspies are usually seen as gentle, sweet. As an aspie female I feel like I'm generally seen as either weak, or sinisterly quiet. I'm just sensitive around the edges.

Striving for eloquence...So far I've ridden atop of the chaos instead of beneath it. But I have shit all over the place and it's getting a bit annoying. Messy car. Messy room the size of a closet, messy old house. Uncertainty of the boundaries of the messy friendship. So I just breathe and sink into the moment.

Shine on the severed, shine until the two become one. Divide and wither away. Divide and wither away....Breathe, in union. Breathe. -Tool, Jambi

Those bags under my eyes just might not be permanent. We'll see. You think nothing could get worse than the mucky waters you're in, but then a lotus flower pops up through the bullshit and confusion.