thecloudthattooktheform.blogsp ot.com

HOLY SHIT! I came across a real-life debate on a youtube video over what the strongest animal was! I'm not kidding: people sincerely pouring their hearts into the "gorilla" camp, or siding with rhinos, or jaguars, or whatever! I haven't laughed so hard in my life. This gave me an opportunity to share one of my favorite Jack Handey quotes: "Contrary to what most people say, the most dangerous animal in the world is not the lion or the tiger or even the elephant. It's a shark riding on an elephant's back, just trampling and eating everything they see."
ALSO, there's a guy on youtube who wonders "what would happen if we hit the moon with a nuke? " And some other guy replied to advise us (?) not to do so, because it might "fuck up the oceans." And that's done it: I have shit my pants laughing.

IF YOU'VE COME TO VIEW MY PROFILE BECAUSE YOU'RE PISSED OFF ABOUT MY APPLAUSE FOR THE BLACK PANTHERS OR THE VIETNAMESE RESISTANCE: I have only one political opinion, everything else is an ad hoc reformulation of it: whenever people, especially poor people, are insulted and abused, that's whose side I'm on. Theirs. P.S. In case you're wondering--
1.I'm not black like Barry White, no I am white like Frank Black is.
2.No, I wasn't in Vietnam. I wasn't born yet. So what could I possibly know about it? Apparently a lot more than some people who experienced it, all of whom nearly died, so they tell me. Just like I know a lot more about, oh, glioblastoma multiforme than my cousin, who experienced it and did indeed die. Because he was like nine. And had brain cancer. Which is too immediate, cognitively crippling, and distracting (brain-cancer-on-the-brain) to allow anybody of any age to study it dispassionately. Like Vietnam, apparently. (Before you accuse me of not caring about war veterans or my sick cousin, please: Fck off and die. Then get back to me asap with your comments.)

IF YOU'VE COME HERE BECAUSE YOU'RE PISSED OFF ABOUT MY AYN RAND COMMENTS: Let me summarize them for you to read all over again. Ayn Rand is a looney old bat. Some people aren't embraced by the "intellectual establishment" because they're plain old idiots, too eager to idealize their own shortcomings, and misunderstand the value of rejection. Ayn Rand is their hideous, egg-laying queen, the unsightly mother of a whole army of mindless pretentious f'cks and too-cool-for-school undergraduates.

IF YOU'VE COME HERE BECAUSE YOU LOVE JOHN MCCAIN: Let me help you hate me even more.
John McCain always knew the Vietnam war was motivated only by the interests of our privileged class, his own. And since killing very poor people sounded interesting, he volunteered--but with the explicit understanding that he was NOT to be shot at. He didn't sign up to fight on the ground, in the mud, with the poor slobs who were getting shot up and mangled and blown up! He signed up to fly an obscenely expensive plane, high above the fighting, to drop bombs on the poorest of the poor and their children. Fuck yeah! And since Moscow wouldn't dare supply the Vietnamese with surface-to-air missiles, he could sign up with a clear mind, assured that the next couple of years of bankable heroism were going to be easy, like his life was meant to be. That was his understanding.
On October 26, 1967, that understanding was cruelly betrayed, when the people he was dropping bombs on shot back at him, with blatant hostility. This was a new low for the Vietnamese (who had no business being in that country in the first place). McCain had just finished heroically bombing an urban power plant in Hanoi, when his plane was struck by a surface-to-air missile--totally unfair!
McCain never expected such underhandedness, even from the Vietnamese. American pilots were told they could bomb with impunity, and the Vietnamese couldn't do shit about it. That surface-to-air missile speaks of an international communist conspiracy! They would not stop short of bodily harming a wealthy American in the prime of his youth just to protect their precious thermal power plants and communist residential buildings.
What's more, the Vietnamese did not even give him a free plane ticket home until after the war was over! When we had the decency to often forego our favorite game of hide-and-seek-and-shoot-and-ki ll with Vietcong prisoners whose hands were hilariously bound. (I watched a real film of such a game here on youtube... now I finally understand the song "Proud to be an American.")
You should feel sorry for John McCain, and therefore vote for him.