About this user
I go by the names Redneck Ted, Rick the Hick, and Willy the Hillbilly.
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╔╝(¯`v´¯)
╚══`.¸.eitaK :3
Great quotes and verbal exchanges I have heard:
"Let's take a nice trip into Katie's ass."
" *insert noun* para pussies."
"And why they runnin' wild and loose? If they deserve the ass whoopin' it ain't child abuse.
"I will slam trumpet case into your balls."
"I will smash your balls in with my trumpet case."
"FENTON!!!!"
"LLLLEEEEEEERRRROOOYYY JJJEEEEEENNNNKKKKIIINNNNSS!!!!"
"catchphrase."
Blue: "There's only one copy left!?"
Red: "And it's mine. Click click."
"CAMPERS, ROLL OUT!"
Pink: "Oh Blue, you're so sensitive"
Blue: "Just like mah d*ck."
Pink: "I just wish this movies wasn't sooo long."
Blue: "Just like mah d*ck!"
Pink: "And this couch is sooo soft!"
Blue: "Just like mah d*cki!! Oh, wait."
"Oh, hello, C*CK SUCKERS! Wonderful day for F*CKING isn't it?"
Red: "THIS MUSIC IS GIVING ME A BONER!!"
Blue: "Ah! This music is raping my mind!
"Knock, knock. Who's there? Sex. Sex who? Sex with me. BOOM!"
Red: "Give me your clothes, your boots, and your motorcycle."
Kid on Bigwheel: "You forgot to say please, B*TCH!"
Red: "*pulls out shotgun and fires at bigwheel* Dundun dun dundun."
"Papa americano."
"SAEPE!"
"Quid?"
"¿Qué?"
"Damn, n*gga."
"I used to be an adventurer like you, but then I took an arrow to the knee."
"Ffffffuuuuu"
Deejay "Harry Potter? Now how hard can that be?
Puff: "Hard as this Moby D*CK mutthuh f*ckah!"
"Ahm free, muthuh f*ckah!"
"That's gotta be some weapons grade crotch-cologne right there."
"Oh, my face!"
Blue: "What three little words does every girl wanna hear? Hm..."
Blue: "I love you."
Red: "Suck mah d*ck!"
"Wow, that guy is taking a belt sander to his boysenberries."
"GET OFF OF ME!"
"Da f*ck?"
Blue: "I think you just killed every dinosaur in the world."
Red: "And now I'm going to eat every dinosaur in the world. Circle of life, b*tch."
Blue: "How is that the circle of life- WHAT IS THAT THING!?"
Red: "Activating day-vision goggles."
Blue: "Those are binoculars."
Red: "YO! Give me some sarsaparilla!"
*Saloon keeper slides Red a a shot glass full of sarsaparilla*
Red: " *chugs it down* That was nothing! Give me another!"
Saloon keeper: "Whoa, there, city slicker. Don't you want to take it easy?"
Red: "Don't you want to take my money?"
Saloon keeper: "Right! *slides Red 15 shot glasses full of sarsaparilla in a triangular formation*"
Red: "*chugs it all in about a second* F******CK! I don't feel a thing! What kind of weak-sauce fire water is this?!"
Saloon keeper: "Sarsaparilla is root beer."
"A sexually magical experience between Ronald McDonald and Wendy, interrupted by the gigantic genitals of General Tao!"
William Brandt: "The rope's too short!"
Ethan Hunt: "No sh*t!"
"Stuff."
"Oh! We have to walk?"
"Is this work?"
"I like 'em with ketchup."
"What in the f****ck?"
"In Soviet United Korea, we command!"
"Drugs: they f*ck your sh*t up."
"She's tempting, but riddled with doubt. Friend zone is like the Mafia, you'll never get out."
"Let's play the 'Katie Anderson's a skank' game."
"Honey badger don't give a sh*t."
"He goes hard."
"Guys?"
Dale Doback: "Suppose Nancy sees me coming out of the shower and decides to come on to me. I'm looking good, got a luscious v of hair going through my chest pubes down to my ball fro. She takes one look at me and goes " Oh my god, I've had the old bull now I want the young calf" and she grabs me by the wiener-"
Dr. Robert Doback: "Shut the f*ck up!"
Dale Doback: "On the count of three, name your favorite dinosaur. Don't even think about it. Just name it. Ready? One, two, three."
Dale Doback and Brennan Huff: "Velociraptor."
Brennan Huff: "Favorite non-pornographic magazine to masturbate to."
Dale Doback and Brennan Huff: "Good Housekeeping."
Brennan Huff: "If you were a chick, who's the one guy you'd sleep with?"
Dale Doback and Brennan Huff: "John Stamos."
Dale Doback: (stomps foot) "What?*
Brennan Huff: "Did we just become best friends?"
Dale Doback: "Yep!" *they high five each other*
Brennan Huff: "Do you wanna do karate in the garage?"
Dale Doback: "Yep!" *proceed to have an epic montage of karate in the garage.*
"Let's see how long it takes for Pantelis to notice this."
"Windex is for pussies, my friend."
"You took my son. Where is my son?"
"CAROLINA!! QUÉ ESO? ESO ES REGIONALISM!! RRRREEEGGGGIONNNAALLLLIIIISSSSMM!!!"
"You can't rhyme against the dark side of the Force, why even bother? So many dudes been with your mom, who even know if I'm your father?"
"Garbage day!"
"CARPET STAIN!"
"Them cops, cops wanna be rappers. Always rhyming stuff. 'Click it, or ticket.' 'Drop a dime on crime.' 'Don't make me pull the trigger.... or that ticket will be bigger.' "
Guy 1: "I baked you a pie."
Guy 2: "Oh boy, what flavor?"
Guy 1: "Pie flavor."
Cop: "Hey, kid, you can't skate in there!"
Kid: "You can't tell me what to do!" *explosion*
Country
North Korea
Interests
eitaK, Dick Figures, SNL, Family Guy, American Dad, Halo, every channel in my "other channels" list
Fried chicken. It's good.
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