carale1986's channel

I just spoke to Warren Zevon. We will not be receiving any more lawyers, guns or money. Apparently he's been trying to relay the message from beyond the grave for the past nine years, but the fans were already so caked with shit... We simply couldn't hear.

Meanwhile, Tom Waits continues to make...

My uncle shot the Hives. True story. First album cover.

A New New Yorkshire Man from the Future shoots at them every night, in their dreams. It inspires greatness in waking life. Or so we like to think. We do like to make people think they're bulletproof. And who can deny they provide the ...

Skillet... We just spent 64,000 dollar in that bar... So we're gonna have to get jobs now. To cover up the fact that we rob banks.

Mister Reverse Sigma is here. Just because you can't see him doesn't mean he's forsaken you. Quite the contrary.

Trust in Knot, the Real Me.

The dead have already been raised. Look beyond these corruptible pretenses. See the unseen. Get blasted on DMT if that's what it takes. Not that I p...

What better letter to count on, if not "U"? The first verifiable countdown! Cardinality-wise. The 21st! 2...1....

I myself like to count by "J". It's irrational, or hyper-rational, but that doesn't keep it from being the actual first. It all comes down to judgment, I suppose. 1...0...

This poem

if we shall call it that,

or concert of one

divided among himself,

this earthward gesture

of the sky-diver, the worms

on his back still spinning forth

and already gnawing away

the silks of his loves, who could have saved him,

this free floating of one

opening his arms into the...

72 dislikes? I don't think so. Misters 72 appreciate tribulation more than you know. And while I may empathize with the sentiment, I may decidedly assure that having Nobody on your side is quite right.

Anteros gives no fucks. He does, however, provide other fucks their selfsame capacity for vacuous love. Eros handles fornication. Little brother makes due with formication. He helped Psyche sort the wheat from the chaff. He rallied the poor around your bloated corporate lychgate offices. Be...

What better way to spend a night snowed-in. R.I.P. Comedy

Yorkshire is a future fucked-to-death pile of rubble. I'm here to prevent that communist chocolate hellhole from spilling over into the greater continuum. Stupid Howard Moon! Never trust Baron Samedi! He has a diseased sense of humor. His most playful dreams are your worst nightmares. -York...

Not even GOD takes this long to get back.

I wouldn't count out the possibility. Then again, I do have a T.V. dinner for a heart, pumping with nothing but honest to goodness UVB radiation, but I digress. Point is, some of us have always braved the underworld alone. It's the only thing we're go...

I look a bit like Charlie Brown. We have the same shirt, at least.

Quincy Jones helped me! Take that Riley! Mister Sigma: Quincy Jones. Riley Freeman: Miniature Power Trip.

This scoreboard is all fucked up.

Jetpack. Every time.

Count on it!

@chinahatMAN It actually does. I traveled backwards through time to ensure it.

RIP Casey

Comedy jokes!

*Broken

Oh wait, you thought this was Earth? Easy mistake.

Then again, even in Arcadia—I existed.

Hell is what you make it. And that's exactly what they've made this place. But never you mind. It's only my job to remember. Yours to enjoy. Yours not to wonder why, yours but to do and die.

Grandaddy Longfellow! He was pretty amazing, but not the greatest judge of character. He took a shine to me, after all. I guess it's up to me to save the British children now. Thanks a lot, Grandpa! They already hate me, now I gotta save em anyway, just to one-up you. Dick move. A few minor touch...

@prplehaze97 These lovely ladies are the Pleiades. Fates, Laughing Sisters. You should thank them, and be eternally thankful you've never seen their wicked side. Were it any other way, you wouldn't be here. They save the best tricks for likewise earnest tricksters, so it's almost a compliment to...

So there I was, higher than a giraffe's balls, drunker than a thousand redskins, in the future... I'd only just taken a good long gander at the milky way from a great distance, and BAM, snatched up by the skinwalker! That prince of cats, he tore me to ribbons with just a stare! But wait, what's t...

@rainstormseattle Good luck and godspeed, mighty Bearstronauts!

In the future, all bears have bullet fists and rocket sleds attached to their feet. They once fought for sport. Later, only for their own amusement. They were enslaved, once, but they were too dumb to realize they'd long outlived...

Okay, who gave the go-ahead to release my secret memoirs? Not cool, kids! This information is dangerous! Thankfully no one reads into farce anymore. Or anything, for that matter. All's well that ends ill! A stab and a laugh!

Ignore this blasphemy! Abe Lincoln was shot in the head. Or wil...

@JediGirlGabs There are no coincidences when Murdoc drives. The copper sunbathing, for instance. You think he looks the other way for just anyone? Even his spills and misfires spell ultimate success.

Cartoons are real people. Eight is a flavor. And eight is great.

Now get out.

Seriously t...

Someone needs to make this happen, or I will. And you don't want me in that edit bay, breathing fire down your necks, telling you to cut this and that. 60 minutes of blood, 60 minutes of ocean, 60 minutes of dialogue, 30 minutes of previews, that's 3 & 1/2 hours of exposition with no point what...

@saossurvive This is the intended effect. You've got the spirit, now go make a killing in the profession of your choosing. Be careful though, your ears are connected to all these tiny little bones and cartilaginous tripwires, you're bound to break some along the way.

The first of the final obstacles is a burned out highway overpass in Hell where a maddening dash to the finish leaves most challengers rusted to the pavement. The second is a shifting set of stairs prone to shrink away from your feet with every step, littered with countless hanging wires designed...

I'm programming your future dreams to this theme. Some will be nightmares, most will be lucid, few will be forgotten. Ignore the lengthy fellow in the background; he's only taking notes.

Enjoy.

Three heads are better as one. Cerberus stands firm for the soil. So let the dead rest where sleeping dogs lie, and let this be their official anthem.

Four and twenty dead birds—they bleed upon the nest. The twenty-fifth is never to arrive. Nothingmore, Traveler; the Nightwander arrives. Surtr's careful attendant readies his weapon consecrated with the heartsblood of the last, though he will find a decidedly darker Friday this time around. ...

Go ahead. Ask away.

Better yet, forget it.

Mark Eden. Mark E. Din.

The Dinsmith himself. Noisemaster supreme.

Having fun?

Soon enough.

The revolution has already been televised, live streaming broadbrain—this is only the gorgeously pulp variant. Snipe-snout the avenging psychopomp! A lost future Ankou, raising the remembered dead to carry out his miserable reprisal! And Cetus the sea beast, with his mysterious charioteer! Bu...

@almost1399 Brave soul. I'm prone to thunderclap and cluster headaches, even fast asleep. Phosphene hallucinations can be pretty neat, and seeing them on screen is almost like rehabilitation for the brain. At the very least, you know you're not making it up. A somewhat comforting notion for a...

Never bet the darkside unless you're prepared to have the whole table jump down your throat. Better yet, stick to the wheel. Forget red and black, forget the numbers, think green, placeholders, zeroes. Fundamental tone. Snakes eat snails and puppy dog tails, but we all die in hot houses. Lor...

Needs must when the Diomed necessitates. Should your opponent prove equally wily, bind his hands behind his back. Should your foremost opponent turn out to be yourself, bind him anyway. Someone has to carry that Palladium, but I'm not taking my eyes off either of us. Everyone is suspect. Esp...

@SeraphSonata Seriously, you're welcome.

Futures are easily fixed. Ask any time traveler. Better yet, tell yourself. Autosuggestion works just as well. See, even the future renditions of you can change on the fly, the trick is knowing how to sneak one by. True wizard shit is a subtle art. Lying to yourself goes a long way, but bel...

@djtahoe Every time someone says, "I can respect both version", a cat gets its wings.

I am the last cat person. Tybalt, prince of cats! Apparently no one respects both old and new anymore.

Shoot for mercury. 25 gun salute. Quartered, drawn, unspeakable seasons born of the witches, and the fire I've stolen. I bide my time, still waiting for the one who will take my head and inherit the curse of a dying generation. The children are safe. It is all the matter we could ever hope t...

Not much, as it turns out. A world without words awaits. Logos, Eros, Concordia, all assembled. Life goes on. Green warden. Let the first errant knight take my head, I'll return the favor in a year's time. Enjoy.

@sanpedrolocal1970 The bass player looks like a golden god riding a freight train of pure spectral aggression. This is your idol. Trust nothing, believe everything.

3, 2, D, 0. The four whoresmen, all assembled. Lord knows I don't fit, but it sure seems beyond us. The archer's bows were never broken, only toys. Suffragette city chewed me up and spit me out a right nightmare walking. Teach a dead man how to die, he only goes so far to lie down outside, st...

Nah, guy. You're alright. I only haunt fakes, simonists, and charlatans. Humor is always appreciated.

Greatest grandaddy Longfellow wrote me a long time ago. Some of the words were theirs, the spaces we made were only to keep me busy, if not exactly occupied. Everyone begs for the legend, and we have but to sound off on the profane prayers of a generation, frozen, incubating all the same. Isra...

@420BrainMelt Sure you do. You got a friend in me!

Left foot, right foot, cleft hoof, serval step, little win. An amorphous mixture of wondrous components, tied up in nothing, endlessly living breathing dying reviving all around you. You're only sleeping, peradventure to dreaming! This is th...

I guess we'll never know. The man in the 100th window and I, we settled the whole bit with a coin flip, more or less. A petty juggling act is all. Half in, half out. Can you tell the blueprint from the fake? Can you spot a sleight of hand in advance? What if it was never there at all? My l...

"You always think it's you." -Yorkshire man from the future.

The witch trials. Maybe I'll always keep a bit of nostalgia for simpler times gone so wrong. Keepsakes, namesakes, heaven's sake, burning at the stake. It's a compelling dream. The middle of infinity is already the tip of your finger. Either you've found it, or it doesn't, and cannot, nor ev...

Folks want a Baal stays dead, not plays dead. I'd dance, but I have a feeling I already have. We feign passage, admiration, quietest adoration. Only the eraser knows for certain, and he never did much care for sharing. Second hands are like that. One taketh, the other taken away. Already wrenche...

Dropout, washout, fallout, copout, knockout, sellout, holdout.

School is for losers anyway. Zero to heroes. Hero to antiheroes. Monster to most. Keep to your heel, boys and girls. Santa Claus is on his way.