About this user
Well, you guessed it. I converted to Scientology. With one slight exception. As the "666" tattoo on my forehead (and the matching one on my foreSKIN) aren't easily removed, I feel obligated to still be a little bit of a Satanist. Plus, I am still the Antichrist. But I now KNOW for 100% CERTAINTY that we are possessed by little alien things that are called "thetans". Satanists call them "angels". Point is, they make us do terrible things, like make Oprah rich or support Micheal Moore's fat ass. But with the proper tools of Scientology, a lot of money, and some prayers to Satan, we can be cured of these afflicting thetans/angels. I'm proud to be the first Satantologist (that I am aware of). If you wish to join my cult, read further, and I will specify the method for joining. That hasn't changed except now before I fill you with the spirit of Satan, I will require a few dollars.
I don't ban or remove comments. So feel free to be a prick. Or be civil. And I will.
Having said that... fuck your god! As long as he fights science and progress, he can lick my ass. As long as you insist on making laws based on your religion (violating the very idea of being an American) instead of morality, I will say your god in a genocidal, petty tyrant that needs to be put on the same trash heap as all the other imaginary friends out there.
If you think I'm going to hell, you're wrong; I'm in hell. I'm surrounded by fools who think the world is better off without different opinions. They want to push out anything that differs from their little black book of genital mutilation, rape, and sheep's blood. They suck the life out of the world. The religious truly suck.
I hate Christians, Muslims, and anyone else who thinks that their book of bullshit is better than a science book. Then they breed, and brainwash their kids. And then they vote, forcing their beliefs onto us. And then they preach, stealing minds of the emotionally weak. Or mentally unstable. Or those who have had near-death experiences. If you want to see where god came from, google "neurotheology". He's our invention, not the other way around.
I enjoy burning religious texts after reading them and laughing heavily. I enjoy toasting marshmallows on said texts as they burn. I also enjoy torturing small animals, raping larger ones, and killing babies. Because I'm an atheist.
I believe that religion is a great way to make money. And ever since I had a vision from Satan telling me I was the Antichrist, I have been thinking. So I am starting up the 1st church of The Antichrist. At least I think it's the first. Anyway, I can perform miracles too. I can curse god in the most articulate of ways and not be struck down. I can also touch people and make them fall down, if they piss me off. I also have the power of flight. So if you are interested in signing up, all you have to do is get a "666" (or "616", it depends on what source material was used to translate the "infallible word of god") tattooed on your right hand or your forehead, and sacrifice one pig. Or two, if you've been naughty. Then I will fill you with the holy spirit of Satan, and you will see Darwin at the gates of the great atheist mansion in the sky. You didn't know atheism was a religion? Well, apparently it is, a Christian told me so. Anyway, this mansion is sweet, it has all kinds of alcohol and weed and hookers and shit. And monkey-men ancestors running around, laughing at pictures of Kent Hovind saying "look at me, look at me!". It also has a fantastic swimming pool, and a miniature golf course. The golf course is only so-so, but it will eventually evolve into a full-size golf course. We just have to wait for a couple million years. There's also lots of Christians and Muslims that didn't believe EXACTLY as their god demanded, and so they weren't true followers of Darwin, Satan, and Dawkins (The Unholy Trinity), but they weren't TRUE Christians or Muslims So we get em! Yee-Haw! They're in atheist heaven so we can torture them by making them look at the monkey-men and blowing pot smoke in their faces. We also can piss on them, if they were Mormons. The Jehovah's Witnesses get their nipples twisted, the Shiites get to eat bacon while watching "Fiddler on the Roof", and the Catholic priests are given viagra and forced to fuck women. So sign up now, fuck heaven. Satan is way cooler anyway. He gave us the apple to eat, while god withheld the knowledge of good and evil, the greedy prick. We'll give god a real good wedgie when we all have our atheist rapture. Have you ever heard of one before? It's where all of the atheists in the entire world are drawn to... do the exact same shit they would otherwise do. It's fucking sweet! Praise Darwin! And Dawkins is his prophet. And Satan spawned them both. And now I am sprang from the same unholy loins to burn the earth with my fiery gaze. I have that power too, btw. Now if you'll excuse me, I have to go speak in anti-tongues for an hour, or Satan will make my balls itch...
Hometown
Helena Bucket, Utah
Country
United States
Occupation
Being the Antichrist takes up a lot of my time. What's worse, now that I'm a Scientologist as well, I have even less time. I think I may take up crystal meth as a way to lengthen the days...
Companies
The Smithstonian Institute, Rutgers University, Oxford Unviersity, and every other scienctific or educational facitility that's not affiliated with god. Besides the countless Scientology schools. Those are mine, too.
Schools
All of them... Praise Satan!
Interests
Hurting things, burning things, drinking blood, stealing, fornicating, smoking pot (it's fun!), shooting up herion cut with LSD, laughing at other races, laughing at racists. laughing at dumb ass creationists, killing and torturing anything alive, eating babies, assisting anti-religious groups (homosexuals, drug users, etc) in obtaining civil liberties, molesting chickens, and swearing. In church. While I am taking communion. As I grab my sack. Also, I like to check my thetan levels frequently, and purge myself of those agels/thetans. And plug Scientology every chance I get.
