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Justin Roberts asks us to welcome the new and only straightedge World Heavyweight Champion in history CM Punk. CM Punks music hits and he comes out limping, but with a smile on his face, as the audience boos. CM Punk gets in the ring and says, I told you so! Punk says he told us all hed beat Jeff Hardy at Summerslam, and in case we were too intoxicated to remember, hell show us how he did it. We now see a great highlight video showcasing the tremendous TLC match from Sunday. What an awesome match that was.
CM Punk is shown watching the video with a smile. Punk says hes never felt more alive in his entire life than he does in this moment. Punks positive none of us have ever felt this way because we take shortcuts. Punk says he feels every ache and pain of every table, ladder, and chair that Hardy TRIED to use to stop him from getting back his World Heavyweight Title. Punk says it was the most brutal match of his entire career but its the pain that makes him feel so alive. Of course he hasnt taken a thing for it, unlike us and Hardy. Even with the smallest headache we reach for our medication, but not the regular strength we double up on the extra strength. If any of us felt the way he feels physically right now, wed be on a morphine drip. Punk mentions that maybe some of us already are. Physical pain isnt the only trauma he felt at Summerslam. After the match he was celebrating his superiority over all of us when we were all robbed of his moment by the evil incarnate himself, the Undertaker! A video is now shown of Undertaker Chokeslamming CM Punk after the match in one of the coolest surprises Ive seen in a long time. That was a tremendous moment. I was going crazy.
After all CM Punk has been through, tonight hes being forced to compete in a Steel Cage Match. Punk says thats unfair and it borderlines on conspiracy because the higher ups are terrified of him, just like we are. We fear what we dont understand and we really dont know what a straightedge world champion is. Punk says hes a pioneer and he makes sacrifices. He is the role model we all need he doesnt drink, smoke, and doesnt abuse prescription medication like Jeff Hardy. Thats proof that straightedge means hes better than us and Jeff Hardy, and tonight hell prove it once again.
Jeff Hardys music hits and he comes out to a HUGE reception from the Phoenix crowd! Hardy gets in the ring and soaks in the cheers from the fans. Hardy says he hopes Punk has enjoyed his reign as straightedge World Heavyweight Champion because it ends tonight. Punk comes out here on his high horse of self-righteousness, preaching as if the three most important words in the English language are, Just Say No, when the three most important words tonight are, Steel Cage Match.
Punk asks what Hardy took to get the guts to come down here to the ring and face him. Punk asks if it was pain killers, just like the crowd takes. Punk asks if he takes pain killers to dull his reality but hell give reality to Hardy and us. Punk says hes tired of everyone booing him and seeing young, impressionable children cheering Hardy. Punk says hes fed up with Hardy and us. Punk says one of them doesnt belong here anymore. Punk says Hardy likes to take risks so he gives one to him now: tonight, the loser is thrown out of WWE. Punk says that means if he loses, we all never have to listen to him come down to the ring and tell the truth. Hardy says he likes that. Punk says if Hardy loses than that means his lifestyle, skills, and drug free judgment is better than Hardys and it means straightedge is better than him. Itll make everyone else realize that straightedge is the way to go because Hardy wont be here anymore.
Hardy thinks about it for a moment as the crowd chants his name. Hardy says its risky, crazy, and Punk is ON! Teddy Longs music hits and he makes the match official. The loser of tonights match will no longer be in WWE. The person who wins will defend the World Heavyweight Championship in about two weeks at Breaking Point, where every Main Event match is a submission match. The winner will be in a submission match at Breaking Point against the Undertaker!
