Remember this, my friends, and remember it well: bacon, pork chops and ham are scrumptious delicacies which ignite the palate! They always have, and always will.
Mohammed: I know you all have a bit of jangled nerves, but why don't you calm down and have a nice slab of pork? It will definitely cheer you up! Why do I defend, endorse and condone the consumption of pork with much fervor? Well, let's just say you can't spell "Mohammed" without "HAM!" :-)