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my next flights: (all flights are now booked)

14.4 Kosice-Vienna Austrian Airlines (DHC-8-300)
15.4 Vienna-Las Palmas Fly Niki (Airbus A320)
29.4 Las Palmas-Vienna Fly Niki (Airbus A320)
29.4 Vienna-Kosice Austrian Airlines (DHC-8-300)

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Created by

864442

Latest Activity

Aug 18, 2011

Date Joined

Jul 24, 2007

About this user

♥Prague♥

Tower: "Delta 351, you have traffic at
10 o'clock, 6 miles!"
Delta 351: "Give us another hint! We
have digital watches!"

From an unknown aircraft waiting in a
very long takeoff line: "I'm f...ing
bored!"
Ground Traffic Control: "Last aircraft
transmitting, identify yourself
immediately!"
Unknown aircraft: "I said I was f...ing
bored, not f...ing stupid!"

O'Hare Approach Control to a 747:
"United 329 heavy, your traffic is a
Fokker, one o'clock, three miles,
Eastbound."
United 329: "Approach, I've always
wanted to say this... I've got the
little Fokker in sight."

A student became lost during a solo
cross-country flight. While attempting
to locate the aircraft on radar, ATC
asked, "What was your last known
position?"
Student: "When I was number one for
takeoff."

A Pan Am 727 flight, waiting for start
clearance in Munich , overheard the
following:
Lufthansa (in German): "Ground, what is
our start clearance time?"
Ground (in English): "If you want an
answer you must speak in English."
Lufthansa (in English): "I am a German,
flying a German airplane, in Germany .
Why must I speak English?"
Unknown voice from another plane (in a
beautiful British accent): "Because you
lost the bloody war!"

Tower: "Eastern 702, cleared for
takeoff, contact Departure on frequency
124.7"
Eastern 702: "Tower, Eastern 702
switching to Departure. By the way,
after we lifted off we saw some kind of
dead animal on the far end of the
runway."
Tower: "Continental 635, cleared for
takeoff behind Eastern 702, contact
Departure on frequency 124.7. Did you
copy that report from Eastern 702?"
Continental 635: "Continental 635,
cleared for takeoff, roger; and yes, we
copied Eastern... we've already notified
our caterers."

The German air controllers at Frankfurt
Airport are renowned as a short-tempered
lot. They not only expect one to know
one's gate parking location, but how to
get there without any assistance from
them. So it was with some amusement that
we (a Pan Am 747) listened to the
following exchange between Frankfurt
ground control and a British Airways
747, call sign: Speedbird 206.
Speedbird 206: " Frankfurt , Speedbird
206! Clear of active runway."
Ground: "Speedbird 206. Taxi to gate
Alpha One-Seven."
The BA 747 pulled onto the main taxiway
and slowed to a stop.
Ground: "Speedbird, do you not know
where you are going?"
Speedbird 206: "Stand by, Ground, I'm
looking up our gate location now."
Ground (with quite arrogant impatience):
"Speedbird 206, have you not been to
Frankfurt before?"
Speedbird 206 (coolly): "Yes, twice in
1944, but it was dark, -- And I didn't
land."

While taxiing at London's Gatwick
Airport , the crew of a US Air flight
departing for Ft. Lauderdale made a
wrong turn and came nose to nose with a
United 727.
An irate female ground controller lashed
out at the US Air crew, screaming: "US
Air 2771, where the hell are you going?
I told you to turn right onto Charlie
taxiway! You turned right on Delta!
Stop right there. I know it's difficult
for you to tell the difference between C
and D, but get it right!"
Continuing her rage to the embarrassed
crew, she was now shouting hysterically:
"God! Now you've screwed everything up!
It'll take forever to sort this out!
You stay right there and don't move till
I tell you to! You can expect
progressive taxi instructions in about
half an hour, and I want you to go
exactly where I tell you, when I tell
you, and how I tell you! You got that,
US Air 2771?"
"Yes, ma'am," the humbled crew
responded.
Naturally, the ground control
communications frequency fell terribly
silent after the verbal bashing of US
Air 2771. Nobody wanted to chance
engaging the irate ground controller in
her current state of mind. Tension in
every cockpit out around Gatwick was
definitely running high. Just then an
unknown pilot broke the silence and
keyed his microphone, asking:
"Wasn't I married to you once?"

Hometown

Kosice

Country

Slovakia

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