I understand that Scissors can beat Paper, and I get how Rock can beat Scissors, but there's no fxcking way Paper can beat Rock. Paper is supposed to magically wrap around Rock leaving it immobile? Why the hell can't paper do this to scissors? Screw scissors, why can't paper do this to people? Why aren't sheets of college-ruled notebook paper constantly suffocating students as they attempt to take notes in class? I'll tell you why, because paper can't beat anybody, a rock would tear that sht up in 2 seconds. When I play rock / paper / scissors I always choose rock. Then when somebody claims to have beaten me with their paper I can punch them in the face with my already clenched fist and say "Oh sht, I'm sorry I thought paper would protect you, sshole." IF YOU LIKE PINA COLADAS AND GETTING CAUGHT IN THE RAIN IF YOU'RE NOT INTO YOGA, IF YOU HAVE HALF A BRAIN IF YOU LIKE MAKING LOVE AT MIDNIGHT IN THE DUMES OF A CAVE THEN I'M THE LOVE THAT YOU'VE LOOKED FOR WRITE TO ME AND ESCAPE