41225 "IT'S LIKE TV, BUT SLOWER" 3154 2551945118
Number of times on CNN: Do re-runs count?
Number of viewers who wet themselves: 13
You Tube Haters: about 3 or 4
Time left till my next hater: 20 min or so
Oblivious to my genius: 6.7 billion
Ex wives: 2
Good Kids: 2
Bad Kids: I never saw that lady B4 in my life
Speeding Citations: #_%&#$#*&!
Number of times dead: 2
Total number of minutes dead: 8-10
Lucky Number: 443556
Most descriptive number: 333
Tattoos: 200+
Piercings: 10 plus 8 loops of cable in chest
Personal speed record (bike): 165 mph
Years working in Hollywood: 26
Years trying to get out of Hollywood: 25
IQ: 136
Shoe: 12E
Hat size: 7 7/8

I write the songs that make the whole world blow beverages out their noses. Well, hopefully.

All of my videos will let you AUTOMATICALLY respond with a video. I will not censor or delete anything unless it's spam or hateful racist BS directed towards others. You can yell at me all ya like ;)

Influences: Adam Sandler, Steve Martin, Weird Al, Spike Jones, Andy Kaufman, Lenny Bruce, George Carlin, Louis Black, Everyone on Dr. Demento, Mojo Nixon and Skid Roper, Zappa, Ray Stevens, Bill Engval, Granpa Jones, Johnny Cash, Jerry Reed, Marx Brothers, Monty Python, just so many more when I sit an think about it. Now that I am doin opinion an spoken comedy as well here is another list. Penn an Teller, George Carlin, Lenny Bruce, Louis Black, Richard Pryor, Henry Rollins in the 80's,
Similar To: I am tryin my best not to be similar to anything. But I think if Weird Al had no budget, wrote original music and couldn't play any instruments we might be kinda similar. Dr. Demento really is the guy who got me started though. ScaryDAve, thechurchofdave and Chainsaw The Klown as well as the background image are my trademarks.