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I used to believe in God. At least, I think I did. Maybe I never did and just dropped the charade. Maybe it's the other way around, and now I actually do believe in God, and I'm just bitter and telling myself I don't so that I can avoid the pain of being associated with its double standards and its propagated bigotry. The point is, it doesn't really matter - if God is there, then God is there; I, a mere human who can only see things from my own vantage point, am here. And let's face it, religion is neither here nor there. Some birds just aren't meant to be caged. I believe that the phrase "God doesn't exist" says more about the limitations of the word "exist" than "God," and I also believe that faith breeds complacency. Religion is a semantics game - nothing more.

I made the decision to leave Christianity behind so I could be with a girl without guilt. She ended up cheating on me and making me feel guilty about it. The truth is, however, that I didn't do anything wrong at all, and my conscience deserves a Purple Heart. I made myself believe that I was to blame and that I wasn't good enough, but the truth is, if you cheat on someone and lie to them about it, just to suddenly throw them not only out of your heart, but also out of your life, then you just don't deserve forgiveness. You don't deserve respect. You don't deserve friendship. That's that. Lesson learned. I'll pick myself back up and step forward a better man because of it. Vindicated.