Top ten signs that indicate you might be an ape of god (GodApe):

1) Feel you must elect anyone to government that will change the constitution and hopefully bring about the end times.

2) Feel that life only begins after you're dead, and use religion to mask your own self-hatred.

3) Feel appointed by god to fulfill his special purpose, and claim to be god's little friend.

4) Hear voices in your head, have a hypocritical morality and claim to be doing god's work.

5) Feel that the earth is only temporary and that it's not really worth making it a nice place to live for everyone.

6) You're really not happy until other people believe what you believe, and self-righteous enough to think that people should accept this.

7) Waiting for the time when all non-believers will roast in hell

8) You feel special, and better than everyone else.

9) You feel uglier than everyone else

10) You believe in Santa and other special anthropomorphic magical entities