Episode 15: Vids They Thought Would Be Cute

[ValentineDoe]

WHY AREN'T THESE VIDEOS MORE POPULAR? I laugh my ass off so hard when I watch these.

[icyswordofawesome]

I'm like 85% sure that the lady who's baby threw up in her mouth taught me language arts...

[xchucktatorshipx]

ummmm, pink bow tie? where is the regular tie?

[ghost181]

That cavelcade of animal masturbation got me sent home without a days pay. Totally worth it.

[CommendatoreAndolini]

The audio captions for this video is surprisingly accurate... way to enunciate, Swaim!

[LlittleStatePros]

The last act is defiantly the cutest!! just look at that walrus!

[ZombiesRPeoplesToo]

Hudsucker Proxy reference!

AND THEY DOCK YA

[PassTheSkittles]

I feel dirty, yet, Michael Swain is still incredibly intoxicating.

[Megallean]

I am actually very surprised that non of this content gets deleted.

you guys are fucking LEGENDS!

[armyofthewolves]

"he wasn't wearing that bowtie" "yes he was"

"hey he wasnt wearing that vest" "dude shut up"

"look at his shirt" "damn it"

[JEOtter]

Not the best video for me to watch in a library...

Worth it, though.

[Bisected8]

I'd gouge out my eyes...but that would make #1 the last thing I ever see....@_@

[Csidia]

what the fu** is 3:37....

[katheryncobalt]

@Csidia WALRUS

[Csidia]

@katheryncobalt .... needs to be a website...

[RnDnproductions]

The ending was disturbing.

[Dexirock]

I may just be that much of a sucker for puppies, but I still found the second video cute.

[professionallewis]

snake fighting noob...

[TheSilverButtons]

lol i love how he adds the bowtie and then the red vest and then the pink horse shirt and then the bunny and gloves and THEN the face paint !!! XD

[bosshog7169]

i just came

[OLO7]

ANIMAL MASTURBATION!!!

[stumpturtle]

Can someone tell me where to find the very last clip of the cat song

[Vajrayana514]

@stumpturtle "Jingle Cats - White Christmas"

[salsburyp]

Oh, that one is WHOLLY inappropriate...and funny as hell! Think I laughed more at this than any so far. Nice work, Michael! :-)

[ADeadHeaDz]

DAMN YOU SWAIM

[goingangster]

0:43 - 0:45 quick change artist?

[stickywister]

GOTDAMMIT MICHAEL I BROUGHT YOU THE ORBS OF POWER

IM GETTING SICK OF THIS

i dropped them off at your door

you cyborgs have no respect for humans

[gladeplugins]

Mom? KILL ME!

[tadams1111]

at least i can say my dick is bigger than a bear's now

[asterixsub]

Do you think the presenter's mom thought this jumper/suit combo would be cute?

[GuruZap]

A baby Khajiit would be fucking adorable!

[spites1]

@GuruZap what the fuck is a Khajiit?

[GuruZap]

@spites1 A cat person

[ipitydafoow]

What episode is when a dog like falls then Micheals like " is it-" then a tribute comes for the dog?!

[JRO1646]

@ipitydafoow Episode 23

[wolveslovetohowl21]

@ipitydafoow Its the one where he talks about the overdone youtube video's.

[monkfishification]

@ipitydafoow Types of videos that there are way to many of on youtube.

[technicallyabsurd]

You think that weird Brazilian baby would have made the list if Swaim made this episode today?

[blackcaptor2]

"KILL ME!!" Lmao! Swaim is fucking awesome

[DougsPenguin]

Show up on my doorstep with that outfit on minus pants! It'll be the greatest/weirdest porn ever!

[heftyboy20121]

bitch has got some moves! LOL

[CarolinaOcelot]

Dear god, I hope that cobra was defanged.

[pokeyoaks86]

@RosemaryVnestor Yes! I love how throughout his videos he slowly morphs, LOL. this one and the lamest attempts to cash in on the election episode.

[Nickolo3]

2:50 "If an adorable kid made love to a baby."

I really hope he said kitten.

[phdecora]

how could mr swaim say the 'eating gross food' thing was the worst thing he has ever done? after doing that last segment?

[doink1000]

#1 is as funny as it is nightmare inducingly disturbing.

[Exarian]

I fapped to 1

[wannabeair007]

@Exarian i fapped to 5

[Theowest]

Snake + baby!! D'':

[RosemaryVnestor]

I love the way his outfit changes every time it cuts back to him!

[ZomgL33tZors]

The crying dog reminds me Fred

Mutherfucking Fred

[MichaelkSimmons]

fucking hate chihuahuas

[HoganQuake]

Whats that cat song at the end!

[nomyek200]

That fucking horse baby still scares the shit out of me.

Especially when it moved.

[jparkss15]

I JUST inhaled when they showed the horse baby. *GAG*

[NaveedKoval]

you are sooooo sued

[AIReject]

The second vid was cute still. I couldn't get over the face.

\

[NaTaSBlood]

I Believe I have now seen the true face of hell. And it has grease paint whiskers and animal maturbation while Yakety Sax is played on bloated walrus penis with my femur bones.

the horror..............the horror

[GOLDsonic105]

Those animals masturbating were born in the wrong neighborhood. O_O

[RefusetoListen]

you know, for kids.

[pacific14586]

I want that fucking dog.

[GlitchDawg]

omfg youtube removed episode 20 sons of bitches! btw you are hylerious

[AvsJoe]

They did that because it was NSFWp.

[JulielovesTandS]

I LOVE that you mentioned Eraserhead!!

and gosh, I laughed out loud at this xD

[inglebert123]

just lol

[williedla]

absolutely negligent...Letting your kid live in India

HA!

[nanthil]

kill me lol

[zoicd]

lol, I can't believe those guys still manage no make their videos even funnier!!

[mstefaniak1]

Love the sweater vests

[TalesAreTold]

Lol...

[ghjjfsbf]

Wow, bear cocks are nasty..

[LordeSloth]

What on earth, or off it, was that last creature apparently jerking it? Some sort of Manatee/creature from the deep/equine floating on his back in a swimming pool?

This vid made me just a little sick to my stomach, and I feel for that Cobra debilitated life. Well done, don't put on makeup again.

[Narcissus04]

I think it was a Walrus

[TheJoeShow08]

1:53 I almost died laughing!

[EtiamAdvenio]

OH MY GOD. I LOVE YOU.

btw. your cracked articles; the best. i wouldn't read witty cynicism any other way.

[Therealpianoman]

great mum walks in on animal masturbaion lol

[KidsTableVideos]

Dude, that's horrible. hahaha my god. it's like a horrible accident. It would be like if Rosie O'donnel released a sex tape. Everybody would watch it. But we all know it wouldn't be enjoyable. Or a Nicholas Cage movie. ZING. (NEW Nicholas Cage, not old The Rock FTW)

[HaShomeret]

well, i'm scared. time to go to work.

[Aabicus]

Those were indeed extremely disturbing...but you made them hilarious!

[iTouchPod2G]

where can I find the puppy video

[largames]

Haha. The puppy is saying water in Spanish.

[hectorste1]

lol

[princesstamika]

Gah, I love the puppy.

[Mapcadet]

He keeps changing shirts and vests. lol

[sgtcampsalot]

I have been brought to you via Genius Camp. WELL DONE!

Human-puppy has secured you a new subscriber.

[Joseph15melo]

that was discusting aha

[noamzilo]

and i began to hope those episodes were dead and wont ever return...

DAMN.

those suck

[contourman]

Could you tell me where to find more of the masterbating animals? Longer clips without the presenter. Thanks.

/sarcasm

[HandyMouse1234]

hahahaha i like how he keeps switching his clothes

[tauwilltriumph]

Me too. And his gestures douring the Cavalcade of Animal Masturbation. :D

[Monkeyboy92037]

lol wtf, animals have weird dicks

[tauwilltriumph]

Beauty is in the eye of the beholder.

[Monkeyboy92037]

or the hand :(

[airspirit83]

He change from tie in the beginning to a pink fly.

[Samuijin]

@airspirit83 He also gradually morphs into a horrible entity of terror, if you didn't notice...

[trinidadnomad]

i had a overwhelming sense of akwardness after the vid ended

[LucyNemelem]

LOVE IT!!!!

rocking the face paint might i add ;)

[ps2gether]

was going to show to my mother until #1

[bluesmasters62]

Its about time!

[Yabbablabba]

Long Live Swaim!!

[PsyduckRanger]

Lol, forgot his own name...

[Theowest]

FIFTY-THREE!!!! :D

[vanrulzz]

o.0

[farfromsubtle]

Terrifying.

[dahwang12]

One of my fav. from Michael Swain. Especially because he progressively becomes more disturbing after each countdown.

[bananalord12]

This is a funny episode

[JosephPockaj]

yeahs

[TheEdibleShoe]

Win.