Touring the Moron Church Temple

[austindaw3]

what a faggot

[Justicejamesb]

Dude, you're pretty fucked up!

[IExposeMormonism]

Mormons, like Freemasons, do where aprons. I think it's for wiping off the blood when you exit the cave of celestial gory.......

[stokestwin9877]

mormon.org

[dredsdomain]

What's sad is people probably believe what he's saying

[ianparham]

hahahaha that was funny! i dont think theyd let you in with that nice beard tho.

haha and i doubt youd fit thru the crawl space.

[moronchurch]

@ianparham - Thank you. Again, you may have confused us with COJCOLDS, in our church beards are considered really cool. Also, regarding the crawl space, I'm working on losing a few pounds. Thanks for your comments, and best wishes.

[justwannamakeluv]

~I didn't think the morons were supposed to show what happens in the celesital room~

[moronchurch]

You might have us confused with COJCOLDS. COJCOLDS is pretty secretive, because they are self-conscious and don't want their new-found friends in the Christian conservative movement to know about their wacky practices.

Our church has a much more open policy about sharing our wacky practices.

[ANJOMORONI]

how can people respect your opinion when you just disrespect and mock other peoples beliefs and opinions?

i didnt see any other guy siding the moRmon church, so i hope you dont delete this comment. thanks :)

[moronchurch]

I don't understand your comment. I don't see what is disrespectful about showing our sacred temple to people so they can understand our religion. I make reference occasionally to COJCOLDS and its practices because those are more well known, so I mention them for comparison.

Your comment about "any other guy siding the morRmon church" is unclear and I have no idea what you are trying to say.

I hope you will consider joining the Moron Church. We do try to have fun.

Best wishes.

[pearclips]

how can people respect LDS INC when its a criminal operation posing as a religion ?

[whitesalamander]

Wearing green aprons in the kitchen is much more practical than wearing the damn things inside sterile white buildings. When will reveal to us the five points of marshmellowship?

[LDS1truth]

LOL! This is awesome! I so want to join your church!

[moronchurch]

We'd love to have you. The application process is fairly simple. I'll be away for a few days (kind of a mandatory re-training session) and when I get back we'll get you signed up.

[Turandot29]

Some questions for Flatlander:

Will I be given little footy slipcovers to wear when I tour the new temple so that my apostate shoes don't soil the new carpeting?

Will Adam and Eve be portrayed by live actors? or by Muppets?

Is there a Starbucks concession in the cafeteria?

Will the Sister Mishies/tour guides be as hot as the ones at Temple Square?

[moronchurch]

Thank you for these important questions. Our temples don't have carpeting, and portions of our temples also double as cow pastures, so you may want to bring your own plastic foot coverings.

In our temples Adam and Eve always appear personally, no actors, no muppets, the actual Adam and Eve (stories about them breaking up are unfounded, since Adam came out as gay they now have an "open" relationship. Occasionally, Steve will fill in for Eve.

No Starbucks, but there is a watering trough.

[AmishRevolutionary]

Good idea on the starbucks but I would prefer something stronger. Cuban coffee and an in-temple wetbar

[settypatch]

that was AWESOME !

[RandomIntGenerator]

Are driving directions to this temple available online or do you have to be "escorted" personally to the temple?