Greg Morton - Dumb Kids - Lawn Darts

[bigphil088]

damn near worked too. lol funny shit

[shaalis]

Greg Morton came into my store today ^_^

[froggy20froggy20]

that one dont count ok

[dnaivnae]

wtf is lawn darts?

[nasanasa3]

@dnaivnae uh... they're these giant really sharp weighted darts that you tossed at targets on the lawn... very easy to "Accidentally" miss with them

[dnaivnae]

@nasanasa3 ah, thnx for tellin me

[emiliegosse123]

@dnaivnae did you watch the vid?like. whats a dart. whats a goly? you play t on a lawn. and you trow the dart an someone bees goly. :) *_*

[dnaivnae]

@emiliegosse123 ye, i did watch it, i just cant pay attention very well.....but thnx for telling me

[nasanasa3]

i love it... FWUP! *Thunk* ANHHHHHHHHHHHHH

*Pulls it out* OW! That doesn't count, okay?!"

[opain12]

I just saw this guy today in my hometown in the macdonalds

[rmcdaniel423]

Reminds me of a story my friend once told me about his mom, when she was a kid living on a very rural farm. They used to play a REALLY dangerous game. One kid lies on his back on one side of fence. Others lie on their backs scattered in field on other side of fence. Kid #1 shoots an arrow up in the air over the fence. Whoever it lands closest to, gets to shoot next. I thought he was joking, but his mother confirmed the story. Gotta love rednecks!!

[kloost11]

he brings up an excellent point. the reason everyone is so fucking dumb today is simple. natural selection. we keep making it easier to survive, so the dumbasses (which earlier in evolution would just have died off, never to reproduce) stay alive and breed. especially with things like welfare, we are shitting in our gene pool. But if any politician brought up this point, they would call him hitler, most likely.

[vimes95]

@kloost11 What do you meen them ,your Hitler!

[kloost11]

@vimes95 Judging by your typing only, I'd say you're probably one of the dumbasses I was talking about.

[rmcdaniel423]

@kloost11 HaHa!! Wasn't that the whole point of the movie, "Idiocracy"? You make a valid point, however politically incorrect. We do the same thing with modern medicine. We perpetuate genetic anomalies because we can keep them alive and breeding.  This issue is such an ethical tar-baby. OH SNAP!! Did I just say "tar-baby"?!?! I wonder how many kids out there on youtube even know the meaning of that reference?

[TBustah]

There were actually only a few documented lawn dart-related deaths in the entire country prior to their banning. Typical over-reaction by the government.

When used properly, by adults or under adult supervision and as they were designed to be used, they're completely safe. If you're going to outlaw something just because it's potentially dangerous and/or can be used as a weapon, then I guess baseball bats, bows and arrows, and ping pong balls (choking hazard) should be outlawed as well.

[multifire9]

@TBustah dude, hes trying to be funny... and if it werent for assholes like you he would be

[TBustah]

@multifire9 Who's the asshole?

I thought this bit was hilarious.

[multifire9]

@TBustah your the ass hole bringing facts into something where facts should never be

[TBustah]

@multifire9 At least I don't go around calling people names for no reason.

I'm only backing up what Mr. Morton is saying here, that only an idiot would get himself killed by a lawn dart.

Have a nice day, I mean that. :)

[MegaPascal31]

anyone know where i can find the full act?

[Anaheimfan]

When I first saw this portion of his act, I laughed for ten minutes straight, it's just freaking hillarious. "You can be goalie.........OWWWWWWWWWWWW! That doesn't count okay?"

[hachey93]

0:35 haha

[TheHyperkid97]

you can be goalie! lol!!!!

[SamSparkus]

I WILL BEAT THE BLACK OFF YOU!

[tiagensue]

@SamSparkus Damn near worked too!

[Flaredramon8]

this guy is always gonna be funny

[funnymanevan]

" you can be goaly" lmao

[jai2510]

i have watched over 300 times and still find it funny

[MJganton]

0:04 lol

[fallen9100]

awsome

[adamfear17]

that's freaking funny

[exfire9]

i call goalie!but it doesnt count okaiy?

[stupidmonkey46]

you go be goalie!

[Skully190]

@stupidmonkey46 *THUD*

[Leatherfaceman905]

@Skully190 aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa­ahhhhhhh! that doesn't count ok?

[TheEventMaker]

"AAAAAAahhhooo!!!!!!!!!!

that doesn't count, ok?"

So original!

[LEMMESHOWYASOMTHIN]

does this guy have a special?

[KaizokuNoAnzu]

Haha, I remember watching his whole act.

I love his stupid voice. Especially with the parents. *picks nose* "We had no idea!" XD

[hardcoreyouser]

his idiot voice is hilarious

[StillInvalid]

@KaizokuNoAnzu I saw that too. That was comedic gold.

[shelbycan]

haha, thanks for the upload!

i watched this this morning and laughed my ass off

[psychoszekely]

Easily one of my favorite comedy bits, ever. This guy's a hidden gem.

[spoonman6996]

its funny how you dont even need any audio for this guy to be funny.. his facial expressions are just so fucking priceless... haha love it

[Lucifersteapot]

Just watched this act on Just for Laughs.

[Trademark3001]

OMG look at the mouth on that guy HAHAHA i agree with Quillis13 this guy should be on everything!!!

[agreen123]

went to this guys show on sat night.....he was surprisingly hilarious....i wasnt expecting much but....very talented man!

[Quillis13]

Man, why is this guy not on everything? He's fucking hilarious...

[Scotty2HottyPwns]

lol'ed at you can be goalie

[brohuh]

does anyone happen to have this WHOLE show and the ability to post it on youtube.... if not the whole show then just greg's part

[lostxfreakx42]

lmfao

[uchihaxakatsuki]

When i saw this on tv i was lmao i was crying i couldn't stop laughing it was funny as hell!

[grabit2]

best act EVER

[SegaNeedsVodka]

no his best act was the whole star wars noises

[closetemo32]

BWAHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!! that doesn't count, okay?!?!?

[Binfieldius]

ghahahaha

bloody well worth watching!

[Binfieldius]

GHAHAHA 5* and faved!

[Binfieldius]

HAHAHAHAHAHAHA

[Psyc312]

The good ole days of "natural" solutions for ADD, roflmao!

[nitrousxxxcam]

damn toy regulations -.-

[lotarskip]

We saw this guy last night at Hilarities in Cleveland. The best stand-up comic I ever saw. He had us crying!

[nat0snake]

I've posted some more of him in case you want to see.

[adoy89]

this set was fuckin great, one of the best they've had

[ChibiFighter]

*Ok you go stand down there I am gonna throw this Dart you can be goalie* *Throws* SMACK *AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA­AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHH­HHHHHHHHHHH* LMFAO I love Greg one of the most underrated comedians of our time.

[darksidepyro]

I wish I could find more Greg Morton he is so funny

[Extra1308]

Yeah i wished they had the thing

[nat0snake]

I've posted some more.

[scottyboy080995]

lol