14:13 there should've been: jews are people who belive in the OLD testament which does NOT say anything about Jesus. But imagine if it did! All the people killed by Hitler would've not been jews so he could've not hated them!
@josephscott80 i dunno, just sayin'......i mean it could've made a little bit of a difference right? 6.000.000 lives saved: don't you think that's something?
@Mario60665 No one have ever say that, don't push words into my mouth.
it's just even if 90% of the human population got wiped out, we would still survive and in fact the ecosystem would be better off this way, actually, even our species would be better off this way.
@Mario60665 well, an average of 146,000 people are dying everyday, which means 6 million people die every 41 day. i don't see what's the big deal besides on why and how they die. But seeing that many African kids are dying in similiar agony, there's really no meaning to make such a big fuss about it. In fact every day that are animals being eaten alive, it's just that we do it in a systematic way. But we are animals afterall, so it's not that surprizing or whatsoever.
@111E982a you could feel a bit sorry though! besides, the 6 milion jews killed by Hitler were innocent and they weren't dying, they just lived their normal lives untill Hitler came.
@Mario60665 the kids in africa are innocent too, but yet some die from aids, some from famine, some with a parasite in their eyes eating it alive and so on. they didn't even get to live their lives normally. But i don't see you make such a big fuss when tens of thouands african kids die each day but yet when it come to the jews it's some kind of cosmic event. Yes, i do feel sorry for them, but i have my limits, it's not a hitler debate, and their deaths is not that bad when Africa comes in.
A mixture of his previous 3 shows and the podcasts. Money for old rope springs to mind. Absolutely incredible in The Office, my favourite TV show ever. But glad I didn't go and see this or buy it.
Ricky is a fking god rly.. Just shut ur eyes and it will be 10 times less good.. Since his body language is just incredible. Yet this living man have made the most selling Podcast on earth.
only thing he says wrong is what the bible says the age of the earth is. genesis never says the exact date the earth was made. there are just stupid christians who disregard science.
@MoTOwN2014 Well, you can calculate it from the Bible, the Bible tells exactly how many generations there was between Adam and Eve and Jesus. I think that is how they arrived at the age.
@haakon555 That's right, though Bishop Usher's calculations concluded that the creation took place on a MONDAY... At NINE A.M.! Don't ask me how he got that specific!
@elwhiskey Supposedly, yeah-- SIX extras. It says Noah took one male and one female of all the "unclean" animals, and SEVEN males and females of the "clean", kosher, sacrificial animals. Because god does love a barbecue. ;)
Actually, wouldn't the worldwide onslaught of rain, being fresh water and all, drastically change the salinity of the oceans? I imagine most of the salt water creatures would have been exterminated outright due to osmotic hemolysis. Are there any biologists out there that could confirm or refute this amateur hypothesis?
@rmcdaniel423 Such hypothesis is truly a waste of your time. There was no great flood. The whole Noah's Ark story never happened, it's just a story passed around by idiots.
Urrggh, I hate it when really militant atheists haven't done their homework... Nowhere in the Bible does it say that the Earth is "no older than 5,000 years old". That's the line of nutters who have basically added up all the supposed ages of all the people in the Bible, so to speak, and come up with that number. I don't believe in the Bible but if you're going to take the piss out of something, at least get your facts right, Gervais!
The Bible doesn't say it explicitly, but if you back through the family tree laid out in the Old Testament all the way back to Adam, then yeah that would put the age of the earth around that number. That's most likely what he was referring to.
@TheGravitationist Yeah but that's with the assumption that the Bible included every little detail and got everything absolutely right. Even when I used to believe in its message I didn't think it could possibly be the infallible word of God. You're right, though, he's just referring to that idea, which is hugely disputed. I know plenty of Christians who don't have any reason to believe that the world is only a few thousand years old. But it's all a load of old shit so who cares anyway?
also. did they take into account that many species aren't living on the same continents? did noah do a tour of the world getting every single animal onto his boat?
How sneaky is the brainwashing? The kids get a fabricated retrospective projection of the new testament back into the old. Now they grow up with the assumption built by confabulation that Jesus was already known in the time of the Genesis. They may read the biblical account, yet not notice or care about the absence of any reference to Jesus, but they still carry the impression of the earlier narrative, because of primacy (the tenancy to accept earlier claims over later). Insidious brainwashing.
I'm surprised he didn't talk about the sacrifice of an animal on the altar being the first thing Noah did, because that just doomed one of the species he took on the boat
@vaj99 He's not confused in the slightest, its a comedy show and he is being funny, then again the whole idea of religion this days is fucking hysterical.
I admit the guy is funny and all. but really, the concept of species was invented only a few hundred years ago. Original kinds of animals is what the book says.
excluding insects and alike, excluding fish and other animals in the water. brings that 10 million down quite dramatically
I admit the guy is funny and all. but really, the concept of species was invented only a few hundred years ago. Original kinds of animals is what the book says
You said I'm wrong and I gave you facts to look at that support this idea. What more do you want ? Nevertheless here is a video of a youtuber who explains this water mixing phenomenon: watch?v=CccaGaKOlSI&playnext=1&list=PLE5AB461A0E09C4F6
i love gervais but i've founnd since 'animals' he's become less 'ha ha' funny, and more just kind of amusing. I'm english and appreciate his humour, but most of what he says in this stand up is something i'd hear from my mates on a rant in the pub
@punkana19 I think that's why he's so popular here in North America, or atleast enough to get good turnouts when he comes over. The average North American isn't as comedic and humorous as the average English individual, for you guys it's what you're used to but over here it's still sort of 'fresh' I suppose
@12ozshark Pretty sure that's around the number bible "scholars" came up with after counting the generations backward from Jesus to Adam or something to that extent.
@bigdilla100 Then I suggest you search wikipedia for "Brackish water". And remember: Genesis 7:4 "God made it rain for 40 days and 40 nights". Also every surface of the earth was covered with the rain water (I don't remember where it is on the bible) so THAT'S A LOT OF FRESH WATER. In no case this amount of water can be compared with regular rain water which is I think the reason you called me stupid.
People like htis are just bitter about life in general. Didn't you hear what his grandad's friend used to do to him, poor guy.
Don't people get that the church might have gone: "Hold on a minute we might have to edit these testaments, we don't want people knowing they are empowered if we wanna control them".
Don't you know that the church tortured people in the name of God? That doesn't mean they're right does it??
Would you like it if u created people and they did bad things in your name just because you gave them what you thought was a gift? Autonomy and the chance to make their own deicisions?
Think a little people think. The fact it says the earth is 5000 years old is a testament to the weak attempt at controlling people (by the church) and how incredible God is. The more science discovers about the earth, the more we are exposed to God's beauty and creations.
@Bak3dB3an I don't really agree with anything you've said, because I don't believe in God. But fair play to you, this was hilarious: "People like htis are just bitter about life in general. Didn't you hear what his grandad's friend used to do to him, poor guy."
rikki xDDDDDD
starwarsisbest 7 months ago
so god made the rainbow to remind man of the days he drowned everyone on the planet
viridismonasteriense 7 months ago
Hilarous :D
edbenmar 8 months ago
14:13 there should've been: jews are people who belive in the OLD testament which does NOT say anything about Jesus. But imagine if it did! All the people killed by Hitler would've not been jews so he could've not hated them!
Mario60665 8 months ago
@Mario60665
Yeah, the Holocaust was caused by the Jews not believing in Jesus...
josephscott80 8 months ago
@josephscott80 i dunno, just sayin'......i mean it could've made a little bit of a difference right? 6.000.000 lives saved: don't you think that's something?
Mario60665 8 months ago
@Mario60665 actually no. in just 5 years or so, 6 million people are born again.
111E982a 8 months ago
@111E982a it doesn't mean that they had to die!
Mario60665 8 months ago
@Mario60665 No one have ever say that, don't push words into my mouth.
it's just even if 90% of the human population got wiped out, we would still survive and in fact the ecosystem would be better off this way, actually, even our species would be better off this way.
111E982a 8 months ago
@111E982a i knew that! that's not what i ment, i ment that just because we can still survive, it doesn't mean that 6 milion people can just die!
Mario60665 8 months ago
@Mario60665 well, an average of 146,000 people are dying everyday, which means 6 million people die every 41 day. i don't see what's the big deal besides on why and how they die. But seeing that many African kids are dying in similiar agony, there's really no meaning to make such a big fuss about it. In fact every day that are animals being eaten alive, it's just that we do it in a systematic way. But we are animals afterall, so it's not that surprizing or whatsoever.
111E982a 8 months ago
@111E982a you could feel a bit sorry though! besides, the 6 milion jews killed by Hitler were innocent and they weren't dying, they just lived their normal lives untill Hitler came.
Mario60665 8 months ago
@Mario60665 the kids in africa are innocent too, but yet some die from aids, some from famine, some with a parasite in their eyes eating it alive and so on. they didn't even get to live their lives normally. But i don't see you make such a big fuss when tens of thouands african kids die each day but yet when it come to the jews it's some kind of cosmic event. Yes, i do feel sorry for them, but i have my limits, it's not a hitler debate, and their deaths is not that bad when Africa comes in.
111E982a 8 months ago
@111E982a hoho, now it's YOU who's putting words in my mouth. I never said that i don't feel sorry for africans dying!
Mario60665 8 months ago
@Mario60665 hahas, who said you don't? perhaps you would like to read my comment again to see if i did..
P.S not making a fuss out of something doesn't mean you don't care about it.
111E982a 8 months ago
Look at "God" with his arms crossed! Straight to genocide! Haha!
PharoahAfro 8 months ago
2:52 LMAO
mrugod 8 months ago
...and the fish
ImLesterTheNightfly 8 months ago
Love the Monty Python Life of Brian reference!
beezybeast101 8 months ago
Person who wrote that book broke one of the ten commandments by drawing an image of god.
Thisshitisfuckedup 8 months ago
actually the sea creatures would die too because of the change in pH...but hey still funny XDD
PhilosoFighter2012 8 months ago
A mixture of his previous 3 shows and the podcasts. Money for old rope springs to mind. Absolutely incredible in The Office, my favourite TV show ever. But glad I didn't go and see this or buy it.
a312724 8 months ago
Picking on the book of Noah / Bible. Easy target??
Any of this show seem familiar to anyone?
a312724 8 months ago
Ricky is a fking god rly.. Just shut ur eyes and it will be 10 times less good.. Since his body language is just incredible. Yet this living man have made the most selling Podcast on earth.
God doesnt exist..
oh
mybad
Ricky is God!
Nhumqt 8 months ago 2
where's this being filmed?
Thwaitez 9 months ago
@Thwaitez Chicago
imthefly 9 months ago
pictured version for americans :D
Kinioria 9 months ago
Love the Karl bit. Head like a fucking orange.
CrissCross407 9 months ago
LMFAO! =D
bryanpeace121 9 months ago
LOL! Wow, I can't remember the last time I thought of Rikki-Tikki-Tavi!
templar19 9 months ago
love how long he spends on the toucans :P
Rfa999 9 months ago 3
only thing he says wrong is what the bible says the age of the earth is. genesis never says the exact date the earth was made. there are just stupid christians who disregard science.
MoTOwN2014 9 months ago
@MoTOwN2014 Well, you can calculate it from the Bible, the Bible tells exactly how many generations there was between Adam and Eve and Jesus. I think that is how they arrived at the age.
haakon555 9 months ago
@haakon555 That's right, though Bishop Usher's calculations concluded that the creation took place on a MONDAY... At NINE A.M.! Don't ask me how he got that specific!
GoblinXXX 9 months ago in playlist Comedy: Atheist
"Whats it gonna be like in there when those two cunts get on?" LOL
XenomexTutorials 10 months ago
oh and one more thing: so straight away after the flood Noah made a sacrifice? whom did he sacrifice? did he bring a spare goat?
elwhiskey 10 months ago
@elwhiskey
I was thinking the same thing. He caused one species of animals to go extinct :D
MikeoWar 10 months ago
@elwhiskey Supposedly, yeah-- SIX extras. It says Noah took one male and one female of all the "unclean" animals, and SEVEN males and females of the "clean", kosher, sacrificial animals. Because god does love a barbecue. ;)
GoblinXXX 9 months ago in playlist Comedy: Atheist
I live in Gloucester...there aint no antique shops round here!!!
jimmylove99 10 months ago
"i can't forget it, i'm a fucking elephant" :')
heymynameisbex 10 months ago 7
Jesus and the Cripple xD
thefartydoctor 10 months ago 4
Actually, wouldn't the worldwide onslaught of rain, being fresh water and all, drastically change the salinity of the oceans? I imagine most of the salt water creatures would have been exterminated outright due to osmotic hemolysis. Are there any biologists out there that could confirm or refute this amateur hypothesis?
rmcdaniel423 10 months ago
@rmcdaniel423
There are probably some out there, yes.
krone900 10 months ago
@rmcdaniel423 Such hypothesis is truly a waste of your time. There was no great flood. The whole Noah's Ark story never happened, it's just a story passed around by idiots.
parallelogramammoth 9 months ago
Hahaha he's such a genius
giuliamania 10 months ago
Hahaha this is so hilarious.
giuliamania 10 months ago
can you believe there are still moron christians watching this clip defending this fairy tale of Noah!
johnykoop 10 months ago
Urrggh, I hate it when really militant atheists haven't done their homework... Nowhere in the Bible does it say that the Earth is "no older than 5,000 years old". That's the line of nutters who have basically added up all the supposed ages of all the people in the Bible, so to speak, and come up with that number. I don't believe in the Bible but if you're going to take the piss out of something, at least get your facts right, Gervais!
Flowerblood 10 months ago
@Flowerblood
The Bible doesn't say it explicitly, but if you back through the family tree laid out in the Old Testament all the way back to Adam, then yeah that would put the age of the earth around that number. That's most likely what he was referring to.
TheGravitationist 10 months ago
@TheGravitationist Yeah but that's with the assumption that the Bible included every little detail and got everything absolutely right. Even when I used to believe in its message I didn't think it could possibly be the infallible word of God. You're right, though, he's just referring to that idea, which is hugely disputed. I know plenty of Christians who don't have any reason to believe that the world is only a few thousand years old. But it's all a load of old shit so who cares anyway?
Flowerblood 10 months ago
@Flowerblood Uruhgruh bloody militant atheists, making comedy shows and posting internet comments.
LDNLeon 7 months ago
@LDNLeon My previous comment did make me look like an arse hole. Apologies, internet.
Flowerblood 7 months ago
I hope he does a tour to Australia sometime, I would kill to see Ricky live. I think I'd piss myself.
KidsWithGuns1992 10 months ago
also. did they take into account that many species aren't living on the same continents? did noah do a tour of the world getting every single animal onto his boat?
Shinganzer 10 months ago 3
this guy actually makes me read the bible...and I end up laughing even more when I do.
intestinomedicino 10 months ago
"Oh fuck off wicked", "straight to genocide", lmfao, genius
Conifer77 11 months ago 4
How sneaky is the brainwashing? The kids get a fabricated retrospective projection of the new testament back into the old. Now they grow up with the assumption built by confabulation that Jesus was already known in the time of the Genesis. They may read the biblical account, yet not notice or care about the absence of any reference to Jesus, but they still carry the impression of the earlier narrative, because of primacy (the tenancy to accept earlier claims over later). Insidious brainwashing.
skepticoz 11 months ago
OMG this is so funny!!!
the Tucan part was the best :D
moi1st93 11 months ago
REALLY????? Straight to Genocide. Hilarious!!!!
buffjoe66 11 months ago 2
3.10 "....dont put it in a bank ya cunt!" - I dont think the audience got that lol.
Isthisthelongestname 1 year ago 14
ha Karl was right, Noah sent a RAVEN FIRST!!!!!!!!
causerDAguv 1 year ago
Another agent of Ahriman.
Olipse 1 year ago
I'm surprised he didn't talk about the sacrifice of an animal on the altar being the first thing Noah did, because that just doomed one of the species he took on the boat
Kiwimintie 1 year ago 6
Should we fly?
...
Naaahhh.
...
No?
...
Nahhh.
harrifullxx 1 year ago 7
"whats the squid ever done?!"
princessge 1 year ago 5
12:20 - Gloucester flooded and "people have Gloucester homes"... Didn´t think of that hey?! ; )
Embrace731 1 year ago
Thats tthe problem wen u start making graven images of god and the prophets.
it creates confusion in the minds of ricky gervais.
vaj99 1 year ago
@vaj99 Nah, the total illogical bronze age rambling of the bible creates confusion.
lagerbaer 1 year ago
@vaj99 He's not confused in the slightest, its a comedy show and he is being funny, then again the whole idea of religion this days is fucking hysterical.
crispoish 1 year ago 2
@crispoish Correction the whole idea of xtianity is hysterical!
vaj99 1 year ago
This has been flagged as spam show
I admit the guy is funny and all. but really, the concept of species was invented only a few hundred years ago. Original kinds of animals is what the book says.
excluding insects and alike, excluding fish and other animals in the water. brings that 10 million down quite dramatically
DoubleWW 1 year ago
This has been flagged as spam show
I admit the guy is funny and all. but really, the concept of species was invented only a few hundred years ago. Original kinds of animals is what the book says
DoubleWW 1 year ago
Comment removed
DoubleWW 1 year ago
You said I'm wrong and I gave you facts to look at that support this idea. What more do you want ? Nevertheless here is a video of a youtuber who explains this water mixing phenomenon: watch?v=CccaGaKOlSI&playnext=1&list=PLE5AB461A0E09C4F6
and skip to 4:10
macintub 1 year ago
i love gervais but i've founnd since 'animals' he's become less 'ha ha' funny, and more just kind of amusing. I'm english and appreciate his humour, but most of what he says in this stand up is something i'd hear from my mates on a rant in the pub
punkana19 1 year ago
@punkana19 I think that's why he's so popular here in North America, or atleast enough to get good turnouts when he comes over. The average North American isn't as comedic and humorous as the average English individual, for you guys it's what you're used to but over here it's still sort of 'fresh' I suppose
ShowNoMercy502 1 year ago
@UnitedFan16 that doesn't make any sense
12ozshark 1 year ago
His math is a bit off, actually. Noah brought 7 of every "fowl" if memory serves.
ModestDeity 1 year ago
@ModestDeity oh, if you put it that way
WetWog 1 year ago
@ModestDeity doesn't say 5,000 years anyone in the bible either lol
12ozshark 1 year ago
@12ozshark Pretty sure that's around the number bible "scholars" came up with after counting the generations backward from Jesus to Adam or something to that extent.
ModestDeity 1 year ago
@12ozshark Religous people came up with the 5000 year old earth by looking at the lifespans and generations fo people mentioned in the bible.
00JakeR00 1 year ago
to macintub, thats the stupidest thing ive ever heard,
bigdilla100 1 year ago
@bigdilla100 Then I suggest you search wikipedia for "Brackish water". And remember: Genesis 7:4 "God made it rain for 40 days and 40 nights". Also every surface of the earth was covered with the rain water (I don't remember where it is on the bible) so THAT'S A LOT OF FRESH WATER. In no case this amount of water can be compared with regular rain water which is I think the reason you called me stupid.
macintub 1 year ago
Actually if the rain water is mixed with seawater it becomes poisonous for the fish. So if Noah's flood was real then all the fish should have died.
macintub 1 year ago
@macintub
Please oh please explain to me the reasoning behind that statement...
knucklescapricorn31 1 year ago
hes so fucking funny
neilwilson557 1 year ago
man.. ricky jokes around and then backs up his knowledge.. he's very intelligent.. smarta**..lol
Neetia 1 year ago 71
@Neetia ur just stupid
echobird92 1 year ago
@Neetia he got into UCL to study biology and then swapped to philosophy.. i always found that interesting :)
princessge 1 year ago
@Neetia how do you figure he 'backs up his knowledge'?
gnrsamboy 7 months ago
So who did Noah sacrifice? The raven?
janek1978 1 year ago 2
People like htis are just bitter about life in general. Didn't you hear what his grandad's friend used to do to him, poor guy.
Don't people get that the church might have gone: "Hold on a minute we might have to edit these testaments, we don't want people knowing they are empowered if we wanna control them".
Don't you know that the church tortured people in the name of God? That doesn't mean they're right does it??
Bak3dB3an 1 year ago
Would you like it if u created people and they did bad things in your name just because you gave them what you thought was a gift? Autonomy and the chance to make their own deicisions?
Think a little people think. The fact it says the earth is 5000 years old is a testament to the weak attempt at controlling people (by the church) and how incredible God is. The more science discovers about the earth, the more we are exposed to God's beauty and creations.
Bak3dB3an 1 year ago
@Bak3dB3an I don't really agree with anything you've said, because I don't believe in God. But fair play to you, this was hilarious: "People like htis are just bitter about life in general. Didn't you hear what his grandad's friend used to do to him, poor guy."
ifulovesmgiveitaway 1 year ago
Didn't he cover this in Animals? And in the podcasts?
sparkyinbath 1 year ago
@sparkyinbath alot of the jokes from this show is from the podcasts, still funny though.
oscarlarsen 1 year ago
Funny
deonwal 1 year ago
Two toucans... Just Strollin baby
thembrown 1 year ago 70
@thembrown 'cause that Elephant's looking at me funny.
polystyleneman 9 months ago
Thanks!
casper123 1 year ago