This was painful to watch but I know the words are true. I'm trying to forgive my Mother some something awful, she texts me saying she misses me and loves me but it's to hard to let go.
Sometimes it's hard for me to forgive...what i usually do is just forget. I remember what happened, but just stop caring and move on to something or somebody else. I don't like to waste time on the past...too much to do. Good video. Thanks!
I needed this--BADLY. that is my main problem, and these events and people had taken over my life, but I've started on the right track in realizing that I have such a fulfilling life to live and that I must let go and become that person, and I will never turn back again. watching your videos is wonderful practice. =)
PS sorry if I seem like a creeper constantly commenting on your videos haha, they are just sooo helpful!
Oneof my best friends did something to me that's very hard to forget, as he made a whole web of lies around it. He's really, really sorry now, but I couldn't forget all of the lies. I do think this helped me forgiving. it's true, what you sy about not justifying, but just letting it rest. I'm not angry anymore, but I don't feel like speaking to him too, at this moment.
im a new subcriber. I think that its hardest to forgive family members because its not somebody who you can forget even though you take your space from time to time. when family hurts you it hurts worse then somebody one the street because its sombody who you care about and know and grew up with and the whole nine yards. and family fueds can last for years. so my question is to you how do you deal with family members who you know will continuisly hurt you.
I know I have a really hard time forgiving my ex, who cheated on me with his best friend's wife (18 years younger), dumped me after 31 years of marriage for this woman and then tried to sue me for spousal support.. 3 years ago. I finally came to a place of indifference and hardly ever think about it anymore. I would not say I have forgiven him. He is just not significant in my life any more. Besides.. I am having heaps more fun without him!
You have been blessed with a wonderful gift of voice and heart. You have no idea the good you are doing with your words and song. Please keep up the good fight. God bless you!
Your words are very touching and inspirational Ysabella. I can relate to this one especially. Thanks for making it. I was wronged by my mother last year and went through a horrible ordeal with her and my family. It was hard for me to forgive her, but I did. Thanks again. I'll keep watching this video to keep my mind in perspective.
In Matt. Ch: 25 Jesus says, "Whatsoever things ye do unto the least of these, my brethren, ye do unto me." By not being forgiving, we only hurt ourselves. I did that for over 20 years. When I finally forgave my offender in my heart, my burden was lifted. It amazed me how powerful that was. Do it for yourself. The offender probably doesn't remember the act! If they do, they probably spend much less time and energy on it than you do. Give your pain away. Don't carry it any more.
Additionally, how can we expect God to forgive us unless we forgive others? Have we all not hurt someone else? Have we all not messed up? We need to remember that we will judge ourselves by how we judge others. What a great idea. We have only ourselves to blame if we want to be forgiven. We must forgive or remain in judgement. Do unto others as we want them (even God) to do to us. Makes perfect sense to me. It's self served justice. We decide the outcome.
Know why you want to forgive: to let it go, to acknowledge that you are putting a stop to it [unless it has directly already 'stopped', while maybe not indrectly]. Know that while it may be time to let go, it may not happen immediately [and probably won't].
Finally, remember the difference between past and present. What we have now will be in a different form, a different thing to deal with than when it was current. That is something that cannot be undone, but dealt with and treated, and only by our self alone. What will not forgiving do for you but tighten the bond to a corpse?
I suppose I would counter with 'how could one not forgive?' :)
Thank you so much for your reply :) I didn't really expect you to have an answer, but you are very wise indeed! And actually the first person not to tell me to "just get over it, you got away ok?"
I think you are right; the forgiving/letting go thing can't be done immediately... But that's one very good reason to start working on it.
Though survival as a child seems easier than dealing with the aftermath when grown up.
Great point, that the act of FORGIVING really affects the person DOING THE FORGIVING, and allows that person to heal ... A very wise, sensible and accurate observation. I'll bet most people don't THINK of forgiving in that way (especially while they're still pissed off!) It's great that you "spelled it out"!
Wow, your words are a mandala, an object for meditation. You are like church in this post-religious world. Your words HAVE reached who they were supposed to reach tonight. Thank you.
hi, off course i agree with u, but i am very and naturally stubborn, i never learnt how to let go, i m noy gentle with my self, n i really want to leatn...thankx for everything
you have relly inspired me you are relly the most Wise person i have ever had the honor of knowing of. Thank you Thank you youve changed my life, ive had some trouble in my life and just now...youve helped me put it all behind my i cant thank you enough...i feel...Happy Happy happy happy... You are truely and angel fallen from heaven. thank you for calling otu to me and opening your wings.
Forgiving others for the wrong they've done to me is something I've always found to be eays. Most people know the bible says to forgive those who sin against you, as our God has forgiven us for our sins... Someone once said that everyone does what makes sence in their eyes. So if someone does something to hurt you, just realize they did what made sence to them, and forgive them for how it has affected you.
I wasn't talking to a friend for over 2 months and just yesterday I decided to confront her and explain how I was feeling and the reasons of why all this happened; I asked if she could forgive me and she did the same. Now we´re back on track!!. I just found this clip for first time and just want to tell you that I couldn't agree more with you!
right on. also forgiveness is within us. most dont try to hurt us. it is how we interpret the event that hurts us. what meaning we give it. they did this because it means this. look within yourself first. why do I feel like this? is it because someone did that to me when I was younger?
This is such an important topic to talk about, Ysabella. Forgiveness means so much to me. I have a huge collection of quotations on forgiveness. ;)
I am so glad you are spreading the message that forgiveness is the only way to really move on. It's such an important process and we're so blessed to have the ability and even further blessed if we can find a way to use it... I could go on forever but I think you said enough. Take care.
I dearly hope you are a counseler of some kind.I have felt so much better about the unfortunate events in my life because of your words.I was recently divorced from a 20 year relationship and had no idea the kind of pain a person is capable of feeling until now.I am very much indebted to you. Thank you so much.Please never stop this kind of work.
wow. its amazing how out of nowhere you appear on my screen and give me this outstanding lecture on forgiveness. its good to know that everybody experiences similar things, and better to know that people like you share your ideas on how to stay positive. thnx
You're exactly right about forgiveness. It's easy to play the victim and we think it's not fair. In a way, it's not fair when someone does something to one where it hurts. I'm not talking about abuse or what not either. It's best to forgive that person, whatever past they hold and what not. If don't forgive them, then you are hurting yourself. Even though you can't tell them that you forgive them, you are doing it in your mind. This did touch me. Take it easy!
Beautiful. Your views are stong, & carry great meaning on so many different levels. I was just reading about racism & watching vid's about racism & how it sadn's me so much. I can only hope your msg can reach so many others. Thank you.. your beautiful.
I could never hold a grudge against a person- even if I tried! Like if my mom and I started off on a rough morning, I'd get in the car and would be silent for awhile, plotting that I wouldn't talk to her for the rest of the day- but in a matter of minutes we'd be talking and laughing again!
I actually felt speechless...muted, at the conclusion of this. No one, anytime, anywhere, could've said this better. I listen to your singing and I'm enchanted. I listen to your thoughts, your conveyance, and I'm transfixed. Melodramatic, yeah I know, sometimes go on and on...but quite seriously, your...sense...of this is...elegance. Please visit my channel sometime.
good ideas but should some one who has been molested ... should they forgive there offender , what if you just cant? ,i m not sure i would want the pedophiles conscience to be lighter , cuz they don't deserve that
thank you ysabella for posting this!!! i havnt talked to my dad in months cuz hes a prick but it was in the past and why not let it go. no harm can come from moving on because its not necessarily saying what they did was ok. its just letting it go. youre totally right. thanks so much you really helped me!!!
A friend of mine described bitterness as drinking a cup of poison and then waiting for the othee person to die... It just hurts us! That really made me think. Thanks for the video :)
very nice video.. i have always followed that throughout my life, forgive buh dont forget
forgiveness is a kind thing & ive always done it 2 let go & as exactly wuh u sed that is always wuh ive thought too, so thanx 4 putting up this video i think alot of ppl need this advice & its a gr8 topic.. i really love ur videos!! <3
Can't sleep. Memories of someone who hurt me about a year ago were keeping me awake all night so watching random videos to pass time. The words in this video are so poignant I have to confess it has made me stop and think.
Thank you Ysabella. I have to confess I left this video for the last because when you're feeling betrayed you don't really want to think of forgiveness. But listening to you made me realize not forgiving is making me a prisoner and it's keeping me sour and depressed.
Today I've felt really down and I've been looking for answers to how to cheer up and I think this has been the best so far. Perhaps I should dedicate more time to learn to let go the hurt and the feeling betrayed.
I believe your words will continue to touch people as long as it is posted. Not forgiving does make it difficult to live in the present. Thank you for the reminder Maryanne
Just curious, I wonder is she is the offender or the victim, or both?
And to what it was that she speaks of?
My father molested me from ages 6-8 and I made the decision to forgive him. I also made the decision to never speak to him again, and to help fight against child sex abuse. I am not angry about it anymore, just cautious...
so true and it is fact that many people are in hospitals dying because their health has been reduced to a horrible stage of near death because they have lived their life carrying the burden of a stubborn grudge held by lack of forgiveness.
I am simply floored. My jaw has hit the ground. You my dear have given hope to the world. So much talent and so wise. That was one of the most inspirational speeches I have ever heard. The world is in dire need of more people like yourself.
today was perhaps the worst day of my life. i was about ready to completely just sink into depression because of what somebody did to me...but after seeing this i realized it's best that i forget about it and forgive them. because i know deep down they didn't mean it, and that it wasn't intentional. i'm ready to forgive and not dwell on my misery thanks to your wise words. =] so thanks, this weekend will be a lot easier to live through because of it.
thank you....You are so wonderful! How are you so origional??? You're beautiful on the inside. So thank you for being you...and inspiring all other women to be beautiful on the inside and outside.
Yep, I'd emphasise that for me, the whole point about forgiveness is that it is for yourself only. It is not a forgiveness for the "crime" as such, nor does it let the other person 'off the hook' with no consequences, all it means is I say to myself "I am no longer going to let this event bring any more negativity into my life so I let it go"
Yea you definitely got my attention on this video.
I am having a problem with forgiving somebody right now. somebody who wont accept my forgiveness and let go. so yea thank you for this once again your amazing
I think you miss the point...they don't have to accept your forgiveness, the forgiveness is for you to do. You forgive them and let the issue rest. Yu then become bigger than that event and you feel cleaner about yourself.
When we choose not to forgive, we become part of the problem... this behavior leads to the creation of resentments. Resentments are very powerful - they can ruin our day, week, month or year... When we can forgive, our resentments soon vanish, leaving us free to live as God intended. Always remember, forgiving someone does not imply that you agree with how you were treated or that things will go back to how they were...
Wow, I've never thought about it that way Ysabella!
I used to think forgiving was about saying "It's okay," and just accepting what that person has done.
I realized I still needed time to really 'forget' what he has done, even if inside, I truly felt forgiveness. You made me realize that I don't need to really say, 'It's alright'.
The importance lies in the forgiving itself and really, "letting go" of the past and the bitterness. :)
Wise words Ysabella, especially when you say "don't forget when you forgive". I always say 'forgiven, not forgotten' - it usually gets a smile in response, but it's thought provoking, and both parties learn from it.
it's true. we never will know everything about whats going on with the whole situation, as you say. i think it is important to our evolution that we accept & acknowledge this simple fact.
in the end..saying sorry...is kind of stupid. Most of the time sorry is a bit meaningless because most of the time we say sorry to make the other person feel better. why forgive someone? letting go, right? maybe we let too many thing just go. I know it's stupid just to keep hammering on about that one thing that someone did to you but still..... there should be another way. some things should never be forgiven.
I agree with you. Part of the picture is "not taking anything personally", When people do or say unkiind things to you, it's usually just says something about them - not you. Of course, that goes for complements too. If someone says you're ugly or beautiful, you don't look any different than before they said it.
I completely agree with you. I am a Christian (although a really horrible one). I just can't bring myself to forgive until after they were punished (with interest relative to time elapsed) or they made up for it... to me.
My vindictive heart will be what puts me in Hell.
I can be your witness as to how being unforgiving hurts your health, mind, spirit, relationships, etc.
I really can't tell whether its the music or your voice that calms me. You do have a very nice voice though, thanks for all the videos you've made. :)
The same thing. It is up to the victim of any offense to decide when and how, that is not anyone else's business. And I wll repeat: forgiving someone does not mean justification or redemption.
Rapist and murders are sick people. By that I mean mentaly unstable. That is not an excuse for what they did but a fact of why they do so. So by that fact I think they should be forgiven.
The video posted as a reply was a separate post, but it relates my own experience with forgiveness and the need for it. As always, your words of wisdom are appreciated. I'm glad I was a subscriber before you were featured and got "big." :)
Will Rogers said ... "I guess it ain't braggin, IF you can do it". With all the talent that you have, why wouldn't the talent of Forgiveness, Kindness be added unto you. Well said, I enjoy your music and vids very much. Thanks 7 x 7.
"haters" want a reaction, if you give them what they want they have won!!! If you carry on doing what you do or even double the output of what you do that makes you bigge rperson than they are! keep up the good work I like ur music
Maryanne, you are so incredibly sexy! One of the best things you've done during your time on YouTube was to let your hair go back to blonde and to cut it. The look is so perfect for you. When you sing, it makes my heart melt. I believe you have had some very hard times in your life, but you've been strong and survived. I think you are one incredible woman. Fascinatingly beautiful! Love you!
forgiveness is one of the hardest thing to do in life. Especially when someone killed your love ones infront of you. I truely understand why than they have this huge hatred and bitterness in their hearts like forever.
ysabellabravetalk, your video has helped me a lot. Everytime I'm feeling resentful or angry, I watch your video and it helps me let it go. Thank you so much, you don't even understand how much peace it has brought me!!
make no mistake i'm proud of you and i'm glad you got that record deal, and i'm sorry if i seem cinicle at times. it's just that in my life when people do good things they have an ultirier motive. so please forgive me if i seem harsh.
you say that like it's so easy, in reality it's all about broken trust that's why these days trust & friendship is harder to find among people. the end result is you have a whole bunch of people that are bad with people that have a hard time making friends and they become loners. you need to do a video on making friends.
The Bible speaks of forgiveing so that you too will be forgiven. That sounds a bit selfish to me but I guess the point of it is that when folks have the ability to forgive, the world is a better place.
comet1961: When the Bible teaches "forgive so you too will be forgiven" it is not implying a selfish motive to forgiveness but rather it teaches us that if God can forgive us much can we not forgive other human beings ,who by comparison,have much less need of forgiveness?The Bible tells the story of a man who owed his master a great debt,one he could never repay,an enormous amount. The Master had mercy and forgave the debt.
Pt2: The man went his way rejoicing but as he was going along it so happened that he ran into another man who owed him a debt,howbeit a small sum. Instead of learning from his own experience he demanded the debtor pay him everything,in full. Showing no mercy,he beat and cast the pleading man into prison. Needless to say,when the Master heard of this, he was greatly angered and had this unmerciful man cast into prison and punished.
Pt3: Could the man who had been forgiven a great debt not have shown mercy to his fellow debtor who owed so little? In likemanner, can not we who owed a great debt but were forgiven much by God ,the Master of all ,not show the same mercy,compassion and forgivess?
Well, consider the alternative: Harboring Resentment. That does no one any good, not the bearer of the resentment, nor the one resented. Forgiveness, genuine forgiveness, frees both parties. If "what goes around comes around", then showing any kind of virtue could be considered selfish. Though, in reality, it's not selfishness. It's, as you say, spreading the feelings you have around to others.
Feeling good about doing a good deed or doing the right thing is never selfish, as it takes more selflessness to let go of resentment and to show kindness then it does to harbor it and only think about the way the matter affects you and no one else.
Forgiveness doesn't free the person that you forgive, it frees you -- You are so right, Ysabella. It is in that freedom that we are able to love everyone and truly accept the people that we have in our lives. Harboring resentment, anger, or any discord keeps up captive of the other person -- thus we are unable to truly love the people around us because we are have allowed another to control us. "Forgiveness is the fragrance of the violet that clings fast to the heel that crushed it."
Why do you assume that your "audience" is always ladies or gentleman. It seems that you get a lot of peope's responses that are not ladylike or men of gentle or honorable notion. And what about those born with both genders, or those that are in between genders? What about them? Are they forgiven? Have forgiveness?
Some children are born in a very God conscious way and end up having both genders. Are you saying that this good person would not need forgiveness, are they special somehow? I am not transgendered, pre or post op. And I think my pup sometimes listens to you.
Very, very good satirical point! And you do know that I do have a quite different sense of humor than most. I understand the concept of the "old greeting" bringing the "packaged" persona to a more retro feel. blah blah hollywood bs.
"Ladies and Gentlemen" is a common phrase for a speaker to use to open an address to an audience. It means "To all good people". I do not think that it is ever used to specify any gender preference whatsoever. She can not control who watches, but she can control to whom she is addressing her talks.
I don't know...that "to all good people" would also limit those that are not the best of character or moral behavior. Not that I am to judge if that makes them a good or bad person. I just think there need be something more catchy, like "Hello to all beings listening to me?"
This is one of those gender related issues where trying to avoid gender terminology can be awkward, as previously addressed in other videos. I don't think that she was trying, or had any intention of excluding anyone based on any gender related basis. What would you suggest as a better opening salutation?
A simple "hello" or "whatzup y'all" or "Hi" or "Hello to all who can hear and interpret what I am saying to the best of their abilities"...for some may not speak english or be mentally challenged.
It's not whom she is "assuming" to be the audience, it is to whom she is addressing her oration. It addresses her expectation of how the audience should conduct themselves.
Guilt as a motivator to seek forgiveness is purely selfish. We're taught guilt from birth as a passive measure to keep us from doing bad things. It's the difference between negative reinforcement and positive reinforcement. It's the difference between viewing appology as a sign of weakness, and finding that someone needs to appologize often, as a sign of weakness.
I think forgiveness is usually implied for minor mistakes which don't become a habit, however we have to be careful of people that need forgiveness to change for the better. Often with these people, you give them what they need, and they have no more reason to change.
I needed that so much.. Thanke you.
HenrietteHallum 1 year ago
You leave place for breathing Love... you're beautiful Ysabella. I love you. Metta.
thesoundpurist 1 year ago 2
you have great videos .They are helping me a lot with my breakup from my abusive boyfriend.
brniedbeauty 1 year ago
@brniedbeauty
YOU GO GIRL! I am so proud of you!
ysabellabravetalk 1 year ago
@ysabellabravetalk I love that you have such a good heart......i would like to get to know u
jnthnnixon 1 year ago
@ysabellabravetalk your so pretty
jnthnnixon 1 year ago
I just found this one. I guess I needed to hear this one tonight. You are very insightful and deep. which is refreshing. Thank You
lrich65184 1 year ago 3
way easier said than done. i was looking for techniques. ty anyway.
ReformedTheology5 1 year ago
You are so right, forgiving someone is liberating. We must also forgive so that God will forgive us as well. 70x7.
you1138 2 years ago
This was painful to watch but I know the words are true. I'm trying to forgive my Mother some something awful, she texts me saying she misses me and loves me but it's to hard to let go.
mrmartinmartin 2 years ago
It's true. I have long since forgiven my ex gf for her betrayal. It's in the past where it belongs, life marches on.
jgstargazer 2 years ago
Sometimes it's hard for me to forgive...what i usually do is just forget. I remember what happened, but just stop caring and move on to something or somebody else. I don't like to waste time on the past...too much to do. Good video. Thanks!
jdfox1 2 years ago
Come now, surely someone must know this song...
dynamynx 2 years ago
I needed this--BADLY. that is my main problem, and these events and people had taken over my life, but I've started on the right track in realizing that I have such a fulfilling life to live and that I must let go and become that person, and I will never turn back again. watching your videos is wonderful practice. =)
PS sorry if I seem like a creeper constantly commenting on your videos haha, they are just sooo helpful!
poeticjournalism 2 years ago
I think we all need to be reminded of this every once in awhile. Thank you!
ysabellabravetalk 2 years ago
I like your hair in this video ;)) I forgive you
MattBlytheTheOne 2 years ago
Comment removed
John8228 2 years ago
Please please please tell me what is the background song in this video!!! Thanks...
dynamynx 2 years ago
Very good message. Well said.
May you and yours be abundantly blessed,
Lavern
TrustinJC 2 years ago
Forgiveness is the fastest way to love!
allwillbowdown2jesus 2 years ago
It would seem God has written the understanding of Forgiveness on your heart..
To have complete understanding on how to forgive and how wonderful the forgiveness of God is read all of ( Luke Chapter 17 KJV )
In the words of Jesus Christ.
Luke Chapter 17 - 4
4 And if he trespass against thee seven times in a day, and seven times in a day turn again to thee, saying, I repent; thou shalt forgive him.
If this saying and teaching is for man how much greater is the forgiveness of the Lord.
johnreon 2 years ago
Oneof my best friends did something to me that's very hard to forget, as he made a whole web of lies around it. He's really, really sorry now, but I couldn't forget all of the lies. I do think this helped me forgiving. it's true, what you sy about not justifying, but just letting it rest. I'm not angry anymore, but I don't feel like speaking to him too, at this moment.
Sabine027 2 years ago
Sometimes forgiving is a lot about letting go.
ysabellabravetalk 2 years ago
your philosophys R quite deep keep on keepin on
HLuciano3 2 years ago
thanks for the advice
im a new subcriber. I think that its hardest to forgive family members because its not somebody who you can forget even though you take your space from time to time. when family hurts you it hurts worse then somebody one the street because its sombody who you care about and know and grew up with and the whole nine yards. and family fueds can last for years. so my question is to you how do you deal with family members who you know will continuisly hurt you.
Ezekiel816372000 3 years ago
Thank you.
thebloominator 3 years ago
Thanks. I was one who was needed to hear this.
TshaFromTWest 3 years ago
I know I have a really hard time forgiving my ex, who cheated on me with his best friend's wife (18 years younger), dumped me after 31 years of marriage for this woman and then tried to sue me for spousal support.. 3 years ago. I finally came to a place of indifference and hardly ever think about it anymore. I would not say I have forgiven him. He is just not significant in my life any more. Besides.. I am having heaps more fun without him!
mommyfunk 3 years ago
You have been blessed with a wonderful gift of voice and heart. You have no idea the good you are doing with your words and song. Please keep up the good fight. God bless you!
mb912mom 3 years ago 2
good video, i like your hair
tranquilbluesky 3 years ago
When all else fails try honesty, you'll be amazed how often it works!
burnell007 3 years ago
Your words are very touching and inspirational Ysabella. I can relate to this one especially. Thanks for making it. I was wronged by my mother last year and went through a horrible ordeal with her and my family. It was hard for me to forgive her, but I did. Thanks again. I'll keep watching this video to keep my mind in perspective.
kidokuh 3 years ago
Im the person when someone wrongs me and screws me over....yeah I dont forgive espcially when they do it intentionally
Kaprice24 3 years ago
In Matt. Ch: 25 Jesus says, "Whatsoever things ye do unto the least of these, my brethren, ye do unto me." By not being forgiving, we only hurt ourselves. I did that for over 20 years. When I finally forgave my offender in my heart, my burden was lifted. It amazed me how powerful that was. Do it for yourself. The offender probably doesn't remember the act! If they do, they probably spend much less time and energy on it than you do. Give your pain away. Don't carry it any more.
LouGaresi 3 years ago
Additionally, how can we expect God to forgive us unless we forgive others? Have we all not hurt someone else? Have we all not messed up? We need to remember that we will judge ourselves by how we judge others. What a great idea. We have only ourselves to blame if we want to be forgiven. We must forgive or remain in judgement. Do unto others as we want them (even God) to do to us. Makes perfect sense to me. It's self served justice. We decide the outcome.
LouGaresi 3 years ago
It's also important to know that people don't earn forgiveness. Notice the "give." :)
So it's not like someone has to go up to you and say "I'll (whatever they say they'll do for you) to make up for it" so that you'll forgive them.
That would be like trying to cancel out something negative with something positive.
Not that I think there's a problem if someone wants to do that, but it shouldn't be done to try to earn it from the other person.
FateEternal 3 years ago
How?
can't vague that up any worse, and since you said you actually answer question I'll clearify it:
If something that you've put a stop to had been going on for 2 decades and is stil badly affecting your everyday life, how can you forgive?
It's a tough question to me, wondering if you've got an answer
(though I doubt that. You may be good, wise and kind, you probably aren't allknowing either)
DromenKoningin 3 years ago
Know why you want to forgive: to let it go, to acknowledge that you are putting a stop to it [unless it has directly already 'stopped', while maybe not indrectly]. Know that while it may be time to let go, it may not happen immediately [and probably won't].
ysabellabravetalk 3 years ago
Finally, remember the difference between past and present. What we have now will be in a different form, a different thing to deal with than when it was current. That is something that cannot be undone, but dealt with and treated, and only by our self alone. What will not forgiving do for you but tighten the bond to a corpse?
I suppose I would counter with 'how could one not forgive?' :)
ysabellabravetalk 3 years ago
Thank you so much for your reply :) I didn't really expect you to have an answer, but you are very wise indeed! And actually the first person not to tell me to "just get over it, you got away ok?"
I think you are right; the forgiving/letting go thing can't be done immediately... But that's one very good reason to start working on it.
Though survival as a child seems easier than dealing with the aftermath when grown up.
DromenKoningin 3 years ago
And how one could not forgive? For example by staying bitter and keep reliving the past but that's no way to live.
DromenKoningin 3 years ago
Yes, especially for those who have 'been there, done that'. ;)
ysabellabravetalk 3 years ago
How?
can't vague that up any worse, and since you said you actually answer question I'll clearify it:
If something that you've put a stop to had been going on for 2 decades and is stil badly affecting your everyday life, how can you forgive?
It's a tough question to me, wondering if you've got an answer
(though I doubt that. You may be good, wise and kind, you probably aren't allknowing either)
DromenKoningin 3 years ago
Great point, that the act of FORGIVING really affects the person DOING THE FORGIVING, and allows that person to heal ... A very wise, sensible and accurate observation. I'll bet most people don't THINK of forgiving in that way (especially while they're still pissed off!) It's great that you "spelled it out"!
twostikks1 3 years ago
Thank you so much, this made me feel a whole lot better <3
clickfornico 3 years ago
Thank you
God bless you.
bjones3334 3 years ago
Wow, your words are a mandala, an object for meditation. You are like church in this post-religious world. Your words HAVE reached who they were supposed to reach tonight. Thank you.
wills7577 3 years ago
Good words to live by! I agree.
parkguy505 3 years ago
boring
sillytardboy 3 years ago
hi, off course i agree with u, but i am very and naturally stubborn, i never learnt how to let go, i m noy gentle with my self, n i really want to leatn...thankx for everything
cedrikuwe 3 years ago
Thanke you <3 i'll remember this next time!
CreepyInki 3 years ago
In the immortal words of Sandra Bernhard, "It's all about love, it's all about forgiveness....It's all about letting go...." :)
vibrantenergy 4 years ago
"Living well is the best revenge"
Forgiving someone is for your own peace of mind...it does nothing for or about the condition of the person you forgive.
I think it's better, but oh so much difficult, to turn the tables and simply say, "no regrets".
ShiekUrBooty 4 years ago
Wonderful ysabellabravetalk...Great video. Keep up the good work! :)
vibrantenergy 4 years ago
this touched me and made me feel better. thank you
idonttan 4 years ago
Thanks, that was so true.
pdiddy81276 4 years ago
you have relly inspired me you are relly the most Wise person i have ever had the honor of knowing of. Thank you Thank you youve changed my life, ive had some trouble in my life and just now...youve helped me put it all behind my i cant thank you enough...i feel...Happy Happy happy happy... You are truely and angel fallen from heaven. thank you for calling otu to me and opening your wings.
VirusBlue 4 years ago
Forgiving others for the wrong they've done to me is something I've always found to be eays. Most people know the bible says to forgive those who sin against you, as our God has forgiven us for our sins... Someone once said that everyone does what makes sence in their eyes. So if someone does something to hurt you, just realize they did what made sence to them, and forgive them for how it has affected you.
cjmiles2 4 years ago
I wasn't talking to a friend for over 2 months and just yesterday I decided to confront her and explain how I was feeling and the reasons of why all this happened; I asked if she could forgive me and she did the same. Now we´re back on track!!. I just found this clip for first time and just want to tell you that I couldn't agree more with you!
Take care!!! n_n
minkAYuko 4 years ago
I really liked this one.
funkychimp94 4 years ago
right on. also forgiveness is within us. most dont try to hurt us. it is how we interpret the event that hurts us. what meaning we give it. they did this because it means this. look within yourself first. why do I feel like this? is it because someone did that to me when I was younger?
Live Your Life Like a RockStar!
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RockStarInLife 4 years ago
This is such an important topic to talk about, Ysabella. Forgiveness means so much to me. I have a huge collection of quotations on forgiveness. ;)
I am so glad you are spreading the message that forgiveness is the only way to really move on. It's such an important process and we're so blessed to have the ability and even further blessed if we can find a way to use it... I could go on forever but I think you said enough. Take care.
stobby33 4 years ago
I dearly hope you are a counseler of some kind.I have felt so much better about the unfortunate events in my life because of your words.I was recently divorced from a 20 year relationship and had no idea the kind of pain a person is capable of feeling until now.I am very much indebted to you. Thank you so much.Please never stop this kind of work.
mymessagetomark 4 years ago 23
You remind me of a song from Jane Eyre the music where Helen sings "Forgiveness".
HattersMuse 4 years ago
wow. its amazing how out of nowhere you appear on my screen and give me this outstanding lecture on forgiveness. its good to know that everybody experiences similar things, and better to know that people like you share your ideas on how to stay positive. thnx
cramer2two 4 years ago 7
You're exactly right about forgiveness. It's easy to play the victim and we think it's not fair. In a way, it's not fair when someone does something to one where it hurts. I'm not talking about abuse or what not either. It's best to forgive that person, whatever past they hold and what not. If don't forgive them, then you are hurting yourself. Even though you can't tell them that you forgive them, you are doing it in your mind. This did touch me. Take it easy!
jweinrub 4 years ago 4
thanx, that was really touching, and forgivness is a very valuable thing.
jenngarnerluver 4 years ago 2
everything you say is true i have to agree we should forgiven someone that hurt us butt it hard it seems then it some you dearly love to your heart
XXFUCKRACISMXX 4 years ago 2
God will forgive us as we forgive others.
truthsaber7 4 years ago
Your honesty is inspiring. I admire your courage, wisdom, and intellectual fortitude.
5 stars.
*lets go*
CatWeakness 4 years ago 5
Beautiful. Your views are stong, & carry great meaning on so many different levels. I was just reading about racism & watching vid's about racism & how it sadn's me so much. I can only hope your msg can reach so many others. Thank you.. your beautiful.
(sry spelling)
Jekudo 4 years ago
very true maryanne.. (Y)
ur videos rock as i say always :D
this did touch me :).. thank u 4 ur loving attitude
BabiiPhat18 4 years ago
I love you blondie
WiredAmber 4 years ago
I could never hold a grudge against a person- even if I tried! Like if my mom and I started off on a rough morning, I'd get in the car and would be silent for awhile, plotting that I wouldn't talk to her for the rest of the day- but in a matter of minutes we'd be talking and laughing again!
hg85303 4 years ago
Yeah I'm the same way!
ysabellabravetalk 4 years ago
I actually felt speechless...muted, at the conclusion of this. No one, anytime, anywhere, could've said this better. I listen to your singing and I'm enchanted. I listen to your thoughts, your conveyance, and I'm transfixed. Melodramatic, yeah I know, sometimes go on and on...but quite seriously, your...sense...of this is...elegance. Please visit my channel sometime.
lowflyer55 4 years ago
i wish i could adopt your beleif on forgiveness
but i can not
i have no forgiveness
and i ask for none
for i give none
i do demand atonement
of myself as well as other
with atonement there is no need for forgiveness
particlenumberfour 4 years ago
good ideas but should some one who has been molested ... should they forgive there offender , what if you just cant? ,i m not sure i would want the pedophiles conscience to be lighter , cuz they don't deserve that
ladyiscool 4 years ago
I am talking about this kind of event - not when it's easy to forgive.
Being unforgiving towards even an unthinkable person does not help the victim in any way. It continues to hurt them.
ysabellabravetalk 4 years ago
wow, just wow... can't say anything else...
pumadine 4 years ago
thank you ysabella for posting this!!! i havnt talked to my dad in months cuz hes a prick but it was in the past and why not let it go. no harm can come from moving on because its not necessarily saying what they did was ok. its just letting it go. youre totally right. thanks so much you really helped me!!!
<3
brighteyes235 4 years ago
Very good! Keep up the god work. Bless!
djonnyboy 4 years ago
Again, well said. It continues to maze me how much you reflect my own thoughts and the things that I've learned.
Wakk013 4 years ago
A friend of mine described bitterness as drinking a cup of poison and then waiting for the othee person to die... It just hurts us! That really made me think. Thanks for the video :)
lizzyp4 4 years ago
very nice video.. i have always followed that throughout my life, forgive buh dont forget
forgiveness is a kind thing & ive always done it 2 let go & as exactly wuh u sed that is always wuh ive thought too, so thanx 4 putting up this video i think alot of ppl need this advice & its a gr8 topic.. i really love ur videos!! <3
BaybiieDoll 4 years ago
thank u isabelle - i don't know who u r but u helped me...i don't want anything good 2 happen 2 the person i want 2 forgive.
i would have forgiven this person a long time ago but he is a prick
flopsypenelope 4 years ago
Can't sleep. Memories of someone who hurt me about a year ago were keeping me awake all night so watching random videos to pass time. The words in this video are so poignant I have to confess it has made me stop and think.
Marwolaeth01 4 years ago
Thank you Ysabella. I have to confess I left this video for the last because when you're feeling betrayed you don't really want to think of forgiveness. But listening to you made me realize not forgiving is making me a prisoner and it's keeping me sour and depressed.
Today I've felt really down and I've been looking for answers to how to cheer up and I think this has been the best so far. Perhaps I should dedicate more time to learn to let go the hurt and the feeling betrayed.
Thank you!
davidnetk 4 years ago
as always... very beautiful... thanks
rockyes7 4 years ago
Oh my god...this made me cry so much. =/
ibbylove 4 years ago
I believe your words will continue to touch people as long as it is posted. Not forgiving does make it difficult to live in the present. Thank you for the reminder Maryanne
scott02127 4 years ago
I love listening to your voice... Your videos are so well composed.
Janoova 4 years ago
This video made me subscribe.
The colors, the tone of your voice, everything was a fckin' masterpiece.
MacabreLAM 4 years ago
The more I learn about this lady the deeper she comes across. She's not just a pretty face.
On a superficial level, her hair looks wonderful up like that.
Sodnal 4 years ago
Just curious, I wonder is she is the offender or the victim, or both?
And to what it was that she speaks of?
My father molested me from ages 6-8 and I made the decision to forgive him. I also made the decision to never speak to him again, and to help fight against child sex abuse. I am not angry about it anymore, just cautious...
bettymisty 4 years ago
I think that was a very wise and sound decision.
ysabellabravetalk 4 years ago
so true and it is fact that many people are in hospitals dying because their health has been reduced to a horrible stage of near death because they have lived their life carrying the burden of a stubborn grudge held by lack of forgiveness.
thank you for this YB
BodaciousHaHas 4 years ago
I am simply floored. My jaw has hit the ground. You my dear have given hope to the world. So much talent and so wise. That was one of the most inspirational speeches I have ever heard. The world is in dire need of more people like yourself.
filter1971 4 years ago
today was perhaps the worst day of my life. i was about ready to completely just sink into depression because of what somebody did to me...but after seeing this i realized it's best that i forget about it and forgive them. because i know deep down they didn't mean it, and that it wasn't intentional. i'm ready to forgive and not dwell on my misery thanks to your wise words. =] so thanks, this weekend will be a lot easier to live through because of it.
PrincessFiana 4 years ago
thank you....You are so wonderful! How are you so origional??? You're beautiful on the inside. So thank you for being you...and inspiring all other women to be beautiful on the inside and outside.
sarahvfalk 4 years ago
very wise
lordtiberius 4 years ago
that was beautiful and so are you!
J
djntx 4 years ago
Excelent advice.
anarchicmoon 4 years ago
when you speak i feel like you are right in front of me. talking to me.
you are so amazing. everything i love in a person.
xox
jordanlaviniere 4 years ago
Why are people getting degrees in pshychology and reading the works of Voltaire or the words of Ghandi when they can listen to this bologna?
philfredm 4 years ago
Yep, I'd emphasise that for me, the whole point about forgiveness is that it is for yourself only. It is not a forgiveness for the "crime" as such, nor does it let the other person 'off the hook' with no consequences, all it means is I say to myself "I am no longer going to let this event bring any more negativity into my life so I let it go"
Applet2 4 years ago
Yea you definitely got my attention on this video.
I am having a problem with forgiving somebody right now. somebody who wont accept my forgiveness and let go. so yea thank you for this once again your amazing
abeautifuldisaster14 4 years ago
I think you miss the point...they don't have to accept your forgiveness, the forgiveness is for you to do. You forgive them and let the issue rest. Yu then become bigger than that event and you feel cleaner about yourself.
madmex2k 4 years ago
When we choose not to forgive, we become part of the problem... this behavior leads to the creation of resentments. Resentments are very powerful - they can ruin our day, week, month or year... When we can forgive, our resentments soon vanish, leaving us free to live as God intended. Always remember, forgiving someone does not imply that you agree with how you were treated or that things will go back to how they were...
1DucatiMan 4 years ago
Wow, I've never thought about it that way Ysabella!
I used to think forgiving was about saying "It's okay," and just accepting what that person has done.
I realized I still needed time to really 'forget' what he has done, even if inside, I truly felt forgiveness. You made me realize that I don't need to really say, 'It's alright'.
The importance lies in the forgiving itself and really, "letting go" of the past and the bitterness. :)
cococove 4 years ago
i did sumin terrible 2 sum1 close 2me n iam genuinly sori but cnt get dere forgivness? WHAT DO I DO!!!!!????
adaminthenow 4 years ago
Start by learning how to type.
eunit1084 4 years ago
Your best bet is to apologize and then leave them alone. If your right in there face they won't have time to get over it.
daniNICOLEsaysSING 4 years ago
Wise words Ysabella, especially when you say "don't forget when you forgive". I always say 'forgiven, not forgotten' - it usually gets a smile in response, but it's thought provoking, and both parties learn from it.
gumleyboy 4 years ago
it's true. we never will know everything about whats going on with the whole situation, as you say. i think it is important to our evolution that we accept & acknowledge this simple fact.
liquidmajic 4 years ago
I think that is less an unforgivable thing than a lesson to perhaps not repeat that behavior as it went unappreciated. I'm sorry that happened.
ysabellabravetalk 4 years ago
in the end..saying sorry...is kind of stupid. Most of the time sorry is a bit meaningless because most of the time we say sorry to make the other person feel better. why forgive someone? letting go, right? maybe we let too many thing just go. I know it's stupid just to keep hammering on about that one thing that someone did to you but still..... there should be another way. some things should never be forgiven.
IhateReporters 4 years ago
I agree with you. Part of the picture is "not taking anything personally", When people do or say unkiind things to you, it's usually just says something about them - not you. Of course, that goes for complements too. If someone says you're ugly or beautiful, you don't look any different than before they said it.
katiedid6 4 years ago
Yes, this is very important to remember!
ysabellabravetalk 4 years ago
I completely agree with you. I am a Christian (although a really horrible one). I just can't bring myself to forgive until after they were punished (with interest relative to time elapsed) or they made up for it... to me.
My vindictive heart will be what puts me in Hell.
I can be your witness as to how being unforgiving hurts your health, mind, spirit, relationships, etc.
That80sGuy1972 4 years ago
I really can't tell whether its the music or your voice that calms me. You do have a very nice voice though, thanks for all the videos you've made. :)
0Mizery0 4 years ago
I'd like to know what Ysabella thinks about forgiving rapists, murderers.
manco82 4 years ago
The same thing. It is up to the victim of any offense to decide when and how, that is not anyone else's business. And I wll repeat: forgiving someone does not mean justification or redemption.
ysabellabravetalk 4 years ago
Rapist and murders are sick people. By that I mean mentaly unstable. That is not an excuse for what they did but a fact of why they do so. So by that fact I think they should be forgiven.
Heidi49862 4 years ago
i love your songs
billybasstv 4 years ago
Your videos are so amazing and inspiring
xtheusedrock13x 4 years ago
you're amazing<3
townidiot 4 years ago
I can't believe you're labeled as "director" rather than "guru".
DarkGnome133 4 years ago
The video posted as a reply was a separate post, but it relates my own experience with forgiveness and the need for it. As always, your words of wisdom are appreciated. I'm glad I was a subscriber before you were featured and got "big." :)
Illuminatta 4 years ago
true, as a christian i believe that when we forgive we are giving the situation over to god. so that the scales of justice are in his hands
ecacu 4 years ago
Yes, I agree.
ysabellabravetalk 4 years ago
wassup
jayhotrod83 4 years ago
Deep
bbam2007 4 years ago
Mutual forgive is probably what matters, when 2 quarrel and 1 forgives the quarrels may not really end.
Phalanxpursos 4 years ago
Will Rogers said ... "I guess it ain't braggin, IF you can do it". With all the talent that you have, why wouldn't the talent of Forgiveness, Kindness be added unto you. Well said, I enjoy your music and vids very much. Thanks 7 x 7.
elel04 4 years ago
"haters" want a reaction, if you give them what they want they have won!!! If you carry on doing what you do or even double the output of what you do that makes you bigge rperson than they are! keep up the good work I like ur music
Billybophead 4 years ago
Y..Lincoln said it best but I will paraphrase"sometimes you cant please anyone but yourself and whats so wrong about that?"
cwhedon 4 years ago
Stay strong and keep smiling!
agbook2007 4 years ago
i think genevieve108 should put down the crack pipebu i forgive the arrogance and tone of that beings comments.
dafuzz24 4 years ago
To my enemies, I often write to them with forgiveness.
I can usually fit 2 or 3 letters in each bullet.
ttakdliw 4 years ago
A good statement very well put.
BBFW 4 years ago
forgiveness is mostly what i am.
cool vid.
yeagerspace 4 years ago
For me realizing that I need to forgive, and making it a reality is often two different things. It just takes time to sort it all out.
shockthesky 4 years ago
I can't even remember the last time I shed a tear... or seriously considered real forgiveness.. but now...
nnekase 4 years ago
Sweet message
Satyakrishna 4 years ago
oh my goSH you are so cute in this video! i just to want to rub my face all into your sweater ...
threeofwands 4 years ago
Maryanne, you are so incredibly sexy! One of the best things you've done during your time on YouTube was to let your hair go back to blonde and to cut it. The look is so perfect for you. When you sing, it makes my heart melt. I believe you have had some very hard times in your life, but you've been strong and survived. I think you are one incredible woman. Fascinatingly beautiful! Love you!
blackpimp4u 4 years ago
forgiveness is one of the hardest thing to do in life. Especially when someone killed your love ones infront of you. I truely understand why than they have this huge hatred and bitterness in their hearts like forever.
lufffy 4 years ago
ysabellabravetalk, your video has helped me a lot. Everytime I'm feeling resentful or angry, I watch your video and it helps me let it go. Thank you so much, you don't even understand how much peace it has brought me!!
thefragile5qh5 4 years ago
I'm so glad!
ysabellabravetalk 4 years ago
I think you are probably the wisest woman to ever live.
DJTripleThreat78 4 years ago
Thank you for your kind words.
mdrnscrt 4 years ago
make no mistake i'm proud of you and i'm glad you got that record deal, and i'm sorry if i seem cinicle at times. it's just that in my life when people do good things they have an ultirier motive. so please forgive me if i seem harsh.
vikmega 4 years ago
you say that like it's so easy, in reality it's all about broken trust that's why these days trust & friendship is harder to find among people. the end result is you have a whole bunch of people that are bad with people that have a hard time making friends and they become loners. you need to do a video on making friends.
vikmega 4 years ago
Can I carry your books?
whoisronpaul 4 years ago
The Bible speaks of forgiveing so that you too will be forgiven. That sounds a bit selfish to me but I guess the point of it is that when folks have the ability to forgive, the world is a better place.
comet1961 4 years ago
comet1961: When the Bible teaches "forgive so you too will be forgiven" it is not implying a selfish motive to forgiveness but rather it teaches us that if God can forgive us much can we not forgive other human beings ,who by comparison,have much less need of forgiveness?The Bible tells the story of a man who owed his master a great debt,one he could never repay,an enormous amount. The Master had mercy and forgave the debt.
jfranklins 4 years ago
Pt2: The man went his way rejoicing but as he was going along it so happened that he ran into another man who owed him a debt,howbeit a small sum. Instead of learning from his own experience he demanded the debtor pay him everything,in full. Showing no mercy,he beat and cast the pleading man into prison. Needless to say,when the Master heard of this, he was greatly angered and had this unmerciful man cast into prison and punished.
jfranklins 4 years ago
Pt3: Could the man who had been forgiven a great debt not have shown mercy to his fellow debtor who owed so little? In likemanner, can not we who owed a great debt but were forgiven much by God ,the Master of all ,not show the same mercy,compassion and forgivess?
jfranklins 4 years ago
Well, consider the alternative: Harboring Resentment. That does no one any good, not the bearer of the resentment, nor the one resented. Forgiveness, genuine forgiveness, frees both parties. If "what goes around comes around", then showing any kind of virtue could be considered selfish. Though, in reality, it's not selfishness. It's, as you say, spreading the feelings you have around to others.
DigitalJediMaster 4 years ago
Feeling good about doing a good deed or doing the right thing is never selfish, as it takes more selflessness to let go of resentment and to show kindness then it does to harbor it and only think about the way the matter affects you and no one else.
DigitalJediMaster 4 years ago
Thank you Ysabella,
I needed that.
nikitejay 4 years ago
Forgiveness doesn't free the person that you forgive, it frees you -- You are so right, Ysabella. It is in that freedom that we are able to love everyone and truly accept the people that we have in our lives. Harboring resentment, anger, or any discord keeps up captive of the other person -- thus we are unable to truly love the people around us because we are have allowed another to control us. "Forgiveness is the fragrance of the violet that clings fast to the heel that crushed it."
FloridaOminotago 4 years ago
Why do you assume that your "audience" is always ladies or gentleman. It seems that you get a lot of peope's responses that are not ladylike or men of gentle or honorable notion. And what about those born with both genders, or those that are in between genders? What about them? Are they forgiven? Have forgiveness?
Genevieve108 4 years ago
I'm confused - what makes you think someone with both genders or between genders needs forgiveness?
ysabellabravetalk 4 years ago
Some children are born in a very God conscious way and end up having both genders. Are you saying that this good person would not need forgiveness, are they special somehow? I am not transgendered, pre or post op. And I think my pup sometimes listens to you.
Genevieve108 4 years ago
Am I saying that by saying 'hello ladies and gentlemen'? Of course not.
ysabellabravetalk 4 years ago
lol gender confusion? She doesn't include robots or asexual species either. Androgenous androids and earthworms need love too!
HopeNope 4 years ago
Very, very good satirical point! And you do know that I do have a quite different sense of humor than most. I understand the concept of the "old greeting" bringing the "packaged" persona to a more retro feel. blah blah hollywood bs.
Genevieve108 4 years ago
"Ladies and Gentlemen" is a common phrase for a speaker to use to open an address to an audience. It means "To all good people". I do not think that it is ever used to specify any gender preference whatsoever. She can not control who watches, but she can control to whom she is addressing her talks.
cognitivedissonance7 4 years ago
I don't know...that "to all good people" would also limit those that are not the best of character or moral behavior. Not that I am to judge if that makes them a good or bad person. I just think there need be something more catchy, like "Hello to all beings listening to me?"
Genevieve108 4 years ago
This is one of those gender related issues where trying to avoid gender terminology can be awkward, as previously addressed in other videos. I don't think that she was trying, or had any intention of excluding anyone based on any gender related basis. What would you suggest as a better opening salutation?
cognitivedissonance7 4 years ago
A simple "hello" or "whatzup y'all" or "Hi" or "Hello to all who can hear and interpret what I am saying to the best of their abilities"...for some may not speak english or be mentally challenged.
Genevieve108 4 years ago
It's not whom she is "assuming" to be the audience, it is to whom she is addressing her oration. It addresses her expectation of how the audience should conduct themselves.
cognitivedissonance7 4 years ago
this is fantastic! how beautiful! i agree i agree i agree! im favouriting it and im subscribing too :)
Sikosm 4 years ago
i love you andy your friend from missouri
this segment has really helped me from getting really mad at people that hurt me xoxoxo take care
badandy2x 4 years ago
Guilt as a motivator to seek forgiveness is purely selfish. We're taught guilt from birth as a passive measure to keep us from doing bad things. It's the difference between negative reinforcement and positive reinforcement. It's the difference between viewing appology as a sign of weakness, and finding that someone needs to appologize often, as a sign of weakness.
RecentlyReanimated 4 years ago
I think forgiveness is usually implied for minor mistakes which don't become a habit, however we have to be careful of people that need forgiveness to change for the better. Often with these people, you give them what they need, and they have no more reason to change.
RecentlyReanimated 4 years ago