Terrible Sequel Headaches (part 34/32)

[baconlabs]

3:40 FBI Agent Gannon

Legend of Rita 3: Gannon's Revenge

[SimanDS]

Wait if Mike Dawson's Dark World Self killed him wouldnt the Dark version die too?

[CCRockit]

@SimanDS

Because Jack doesn't actually exist, my guess is none of this actually happened and Mike killed the entire town in his insane Dark World delusions.

[Computerbugs]

I'm glad you guys didn't bash on I have no mouth and I must scream at the end. That was actually a good game. At least... compared to this it is. X___x

[Steviedude12]

Needed more Rock Knight!

[robertcmartens]

My reaction to Dark Seed 2/Mike Dawson is aptly summed up by the carnival music.

[Soopination]

>sat through the whole thing in one sitting

I'm so... cold...

[AlkalineBatterien]

@Soopination My condolences... it must have been a hard time for you

[Illuzionz1111]

I didn't quite understand wtf was going on until I saw Mike's mom head explode.

[NailHead86]

Almost run out of booze watching this. Best game ever.

[Error52QFG]

So, Mike Dawson died.

Why does TVTropes say this is a downer ending?

[DaionusThe23rd]

@Error52QFG Mike Dawson was a troper.

[anphorus]

"Heavily influenced by David Lynch", huh? No shit, it rips so heavily from Twin Peaks I'm surprised the murdered girl wasn't just called Laura Palmer

[World1Level2]

Alright, toughest decision in your life.

MIKE DAWSON OR COBRA

[wellthatwasfunny]

I really can't believe I watched the entire series. I really don't. Where did I go wrong with my life?

[JackgarPrime]

Wait, these guys also made I Have No Mouth? But that game was actually pretty decent. What the fuck?

[BagOfMagicFood]

"The penalty for trespassing is death. However, molestation is much more fun."

[MellowMink]

You guys have advertisements now? Did you become a partner or is it just because the game footage is copyrighted?

[lich109]

This game was terrible, I'd only give it 7/10

[TheOneGuy1111]

Well the story's not bad, but the excitation is lacking. Way too much time is spent just randomly talking to people and the main character is portrayed as a complete loser that it's hard to feel for. The animations are both bad and bad quality (though there is a nice head exploding part), and many parts have logic problems (such as why Mike couldn't just slide the anvil off and why that baby spends practically the entire game chewing the food you gave him). Overall not a very good game.

10/10

[lich109]

@TheOneGuy1111 People think this is a useless review.

[posthumanfetus]

I've been thinking, and I've got some ideas to improve Jack.

1) Jack should be louder, angrier, and have access to a time machine.

2) Whenever Jack is not onscreen, all the other characters should be asking, "Where's Jack?"

[sympathy3k21]

I don't think they could have made a better ending than Jack just riding off on his dark world motorcycle. Pure genius.

[JackIsASexyMf]

Upload more videos!

[EdMan6623]

@JackIsASexyMf They have two more Cobra vids up on blip

[TollingBells]

So I think the entire two games would make more sense if the Dark World didn't actually exist and was actually a product of Mike's instability and insanity. Obviously he did kill everyone, but it wasn't because of some Dark World BS, it was because they all wronged him. It's more likely, though, that Mike Dawson just really pissed off whoever was in charge of Darkseed 2. I want to know what he did, because this game is just terrible and it tears into him so viciously...Probably a failed student.

[seijuruhiko]

Dead to rights



[downoncorner]

/watch?v=UYaepppCQfM

Mike Dawson is at 0:56

[grit1]

To be honest, this entire game, the plot line isn't that awful. It's a pretty interesting concept, but the execution is just so poor.

[PickpocketSan]

Someone should make them a Shrimp Baby plushie like they did with the Metroid plushie.

[EdMan6623]

@PickpocketSan Someone did make a shrimp baby plushie actually, look it up

[TweetyAffect]

tomato soup its not only delirious,i its deadly.

[lich109]

It's funny, after watching these, I looked up the individual H.R. Giger pieces used in them, and I have to say, they ROYALLY fucked over his artwork. He's probably as pissed at this game as the real Mike Dawson is.

[solidwtf2]

Turns out Mike dawson was voiced (uncredited) by someone named Danny De La Paz (if IMDB is right) who also popped up in a film that mst3k riffed. Seems like mike dawson is following us everywhere.

[InfinitisStormcaster]

You guys should be proud. I'm pretty damn sure you've just started a Mike Dawson meme with all these Darkseed longplay "reviews". Retsupurae forever!

[KingBrawnzProduction]

These "jpegs" are a real headache...

[AmazingL4rry]

Mike Dawson is still more masculine and competent than Curtis Craig.

[ZodiakZen]

@AmazingL4rry

I heard that Curtis..

[Ileko1]

@AmazingL4rry I was gonna comment that who is more pathetic Curtis Craig or Mike Dawson and saw your comment. Hehe.

[arce148]

pause at 4:04 leisure suit larry 8 magna cum laude what a naughty long player

[Hubadaeus]

... and it turns out Slowbeef is actually Diabetus!

[Invisibrah]

test

[PickpocketSan]

After seeing Action Dawson's Fighting Stance, I've come to the conclusion that Mike Dawson is the adventure game equivelant of Dan Hibiki.

[Judgementxxx]

@PickpocketSan nah Dan would at least put a much better fight than Dawson.

[smpletan]

2:25 Holy shit, Klug from the last game tested for Darkseed 2?!

[KantorekBaumerB14]

eeeh, ya died pal.

[videogamenostalgia]

Elrond: 'I was there, Gandalf. I was there three thousand years ago. I was there the day the strength of Men failed.'

*flashback*

'I led Mike Dawson deep into the fires of Mount Doom, where the Ring was forged, the one place it could be destroyed'

Elrond: 'Cast it into the fire! Destroy it!'

*Mike limply throws the ring at the fire, and it misses, bouncing off a rock*

Sauron: Eeeh, ya missed, pal...

*cuts back to present*

'It should have ended that day, but evil was allowed to endure...'

[DefendedHomestand]

Wait, so who knocked out whats his face at the pool hall?

[PieSpirit]

@DefendedHomestand As sad it is to accept, it was probably Mike Dawson.

[quiteawful]

this and its prequel could have been really good games :-/

[FusionArmorX]

I dared to think the ending over: Jack is the shapeshifter, utilizing his ability to pose as Mike Dawson to commit the killings, using Dawson's past experiences from Darkseed 1. His wildly different viewpoints show just how flexible he is at putting up an act, contributing to his effectiveness as a shapeshifter.

The Ancients thought he was working for them, the regular Dark Worlders thought he was working for them, Mike thought he was working for him, he even had contact with Mike's doctor!

[SpanishFly120]

Press 5 for the greatest scene ever.

[PickpocketSan]

People who liked Darkseed 2 also liked:

-Meet n' Fuck Rita

-Sonic & Amy Hentai

-Psychiatric Appointment

-Arrival in Hell 2

-Mario vs. Samus [FLASH MOVIE]

[smeagol1414]

@PickpocketSan  who is this rita that I've seen people about in many retsupurae videos

[bioblitzer]

its a happy ending after all

[sternechamere]

Darkseed 2: the worst insult to Mike Dawson since the birth of Mike Dawson.

[lobsopdoy]

Maybe Mike was just dumb enough to drink something at a bar until he exploded.

[RevengeRevisited]

01:43 so we get to see jacks mysteriously absent moterbike after all!

[KantorekBaumerB14]

mike dawson, as pathetic in death as you were in life. We salute you.

[MBvolcom92]

Subsist68 sent me here :)

[PKrockin]

Let's see, stabbed in the back and the weapon is nowhere in sight... MUSTA BEEN SUICIDE.

Sheriff Butler, Ace Detective.

[Delcat42]

More importantly, the dedication you showed in getting through this shitpile is staggering. To show appreciation. To have laughed.  To be sorry this sapped irreplaceable hours from your brief lifespans.

[Delcat42]

I don't know how many people played it, but there was a horror game back in the day for the PSX/N64 called Shadowman, and it had a skull-headed snake as comic relief. He wears a top hat, speaks in a thick Irish accent, and is named Jaunty. He'd a dead ringer for the Behemoth. I think it didn't die, but entered an underworld witness protection program for victims of Mike Dawson association. Same with everyone else he supposedly killed by his weak, wormy fists. They just wanted an out.

[somedamnfangirl]

At the end, the fellas bring up an interesting point in how the many deaths of Mike Dawson could be a big "Screw You" to the original guy behind Darkseed. Hm...

Also, the bar death is my favorite. XD

[Iwuznothere]

You guys need a vacation from these long play runs, they're going to kill you either in the inital viewing or in all the stupid youtube edits.

[SmokeyRayburn]

Sadly, you guys inadvertently inspired me to play Hell: A Cyberpunk Thriller after watching all these horrible play-troughs of cheap horror(?) games. I'd say keep up the good work but i have lost so many years off my life already..

[Son0fABatman]

1:19 "Underestimatededanger"

[AeroAtlas]

Wait if Mike had nothing to do with Darkseed 2 where did they get all 10 frames of his animation?

[TimrodDX]

@AeroAtlas

The trick is, that isn't Mike Dawson - at least, not the real Mike Dawson. Mike's "sprite" and voice are actually done by Chris Gilbert in Darkseed 2. The first game had the actual Mike Dawson in it.

[AeroAtlas]

@TimrodDX oh yeah. I knew about the voice, but I was thrown of by there close lol thanks

[Evan121991]

@TimrodDX According to IMDB Mike's voice in DS2 is actually provided by someone else, not Gilbert, in an uncredited role. Dunno how much weight there is to it.

[Nionivek]

Anyhow as for my theory of the game. (I hope I can do this in one post)

The Darkworld is all in Mike Dawson's head however what you do in the Darkworld is a reinterpretation of what your doing in the Real World. As well as Mikes, or his dark-half's, insight.

The Objects you carry from the Darkworld are all ordinary objects but that are swept up in Mike's delusions. For example the Biomechanical weapon is just a concealed weapon, afterall Mike gives his "gun" away for it.

[cwchrisweed]

Mike Dawson, did you kill Mike Dawson?

[Psychonaut117]

"Third times the charm" DARKSEED THREE IS A PREQUEL

[Evan121991]

@Psychonaut117 Well, considering everything else, I doubt they paid enough attention to Dark Seed 1 to acknowledge this, but technically speaking, the guy who owned Mike's old house before him ALSO stopped the Ancients. So that plus Mike's attempts would be three.

[PaperMario15]

I tried searching for Paul Cooper's model (Richard Bradbury) on Google images and found his image... On a site called "Florida Mugshots".

[pushinguproses]

Does every character in this game have an uncontrollable twitch? Mike Dawson is so derptastic. Now I have to go through these videos and find the part that "Will explain everything."

[CakeDispenser]

Here lies Mike Dawson he ran fast and died a virgin.

[AgentCack]

Don't they see Jack in there with them?!

[Neotails8762]

This was one of the greatest rongpuraes I've ever seen. Yes it took around 5-and-a-half hours, it was so damn worth it.

Dead to Rights.

[SirCarnageTheBrave]

The only question is. Where do you go from here?

[MistaRoburtz]

@SirCarnageTheBrave whooooooooowowowowowoh to the hall of the dead. Attend!

[pullahoko]

Why, Shrimp Baby?

Why?

[prettyboyswag317]

I am glad Mike Dawson is dead... so the game could end.

[ChaladanX]

Do you have to start the game agian when Mike dies? Like in the original Darkseed? Cos that would suck...

[BagOfMagicFood]

@ChaladanX I think you can save your game in both DarkSeeds. Unfortunately there are ways to make the game unwinnable before you realize it, but the second game seems to have a lot fewer of them.

[marioVSshadow]

10:23 you can hear one of em taking a swig of whisky.

[MaverickhunterXZero]

ding-dong Mike Dawson's dead, and theres no hope of dark seed 3 everybody wins

[matthewtbrawl]

yay the end, now we can look forward for more "scary" jpgs

[pockypurse]

THEN WHO WAS KILL RITA?!

[Physhi]

@pockypurse A predator.

[Doperwtje81]

'an then offed himself'

uh, not to criticize your investigation-skills there Horatio, but how exactly did Dawson stab himself in the back?

[Level1Slime]

@Doperwtje81 They know Mike Dawson was murdered, it's just that nobody likes that idiot so they're playing stupid. Jack isn't actually invisible in that scene, they just don't want to arrest the man that killed Mike Dawson, he's a hero to them.

[hehehe88]

@Level1Slime Nay.

...a GOD!

[Tordah26]

@Doperwtje81 WHY WOULD HE STAB HIMSELF IN THE BACK IN THE FIRST PLACE?

Could have plunged it into the front, slit his throat, even slit his wrists but in the back?!

[BagOfMagicFood]

@Doperwtje81 Sheriff Butler must know how flexible Mike Dawson's arms are.

[TheAnonftw]

So what happened to all of the things Mike dawson gave Jack all those things? Didn't he notice that he was still holding those things?!

[Tordah26]

@TheAnonftw They're one and the same. What Mike holds, Jack holds.

If you click on one of the items in the inventory, Mike starts narrating and says something like "shame not all stories have happy endings".

[MalusCalibur]

Well, as far as endings go I wasn't expecting that - I figured they'd have a happier conclusion.

At least Mike Dawson is dead.

[wabdih]

5:35 is the funniest thing ever XD

[usuallydead]

I love the end of this video. The awkward silence, a slightly sick feeling, and finishing simply with "I gotta go."

That sums up both Dark Seed games wonderfully I think.

[LeafyLarry37]

Is it over? can I continue watching retsupurae now?

[TheLastThingWeNeed]

Jesus Christ, Deputy Brown really does have Parkinson's.

Look at him go while Jack is talking.

That, or he's now the Curiosity Sphere from Portal.

[Gamewitzer]

Do Harvester next.

It must happen.

[BronzeSoldat]

So whats next guys?

Another long play, a terrible flash game, or back to bad let's plays?

[Mantis47]

@BronzeSoldat They're already doing another long play, check out their blip page

[liiga14]

@BronzeSoldat They actually started another long play already. It's on their Blip.tv account

[BronzeSoldat]

@liiga14 awww shit gotta get see that

[mrmorozov9]

I wish I could say that I had the determination to watch past Part 12. I wish.

[mtilby]

"And so, the skull-worm with the weird sombrero awkwardly fondled the earth until it was destroyed, and it's all because of Mike Dawson"

[PickpocketSan]

There were only four ways to die in Darkseed 2?  I feel so ripped off right now.

[PickpocketSan]

@PickpocketSan Alright, seven ways. Still not enough to justify all those hours of "*stare* did YOU kill Rita??"

[TheHeroHartmut]

Dead to Rights. But, also, fuck Mike Dawson.

[will66618]

Do harvester next

[MarshiMYG64]

What was the point in finishing the game if it was all just a hypnotic dream and Mike killed himself by the hands of Jack? There was really no point of what Mike Dawson did in the first place, All hope was lost anyway because Jack probably would have revived the ancients and destroyed the entire world.

So If you die in the ending then that means if you die anywhere else, does that mean you still win?

[zzyzx0788]

So....is his mom dead? ...and did Jack do all the killing then?...and how did Mike stab himself in the back?.... and...what?

[KaitonWLOC]

It took a corporation to make the Keeper of the Souls' whoo whoowhoo sound effect?

[Hamsteere]

Thankfully, I already don't remember this...

*drinks whisky*

[ChezJamesy]

now we'll never know what his relation to Rita was...

[popsodarootbeers]

I still can't believe that these guys made I have no mouth and I must scream. That game is actually really horrifying and provocative. I mean... What the hell?

[zeix721]

@bobbyewing311 its spelled mirrors you twit.

[zeix721]

And this is why we cant have nice things.

[Algahiem]

It's just as well you guys played through Trapped, Satanorium, Arrival in Hell and Arise before watching this play-through, because I don't think anything else would prepare anyone for this experience.

[MDM616]

The most shocking twist is that Mark Morgan composed the music for this.

[GregEdgar88]

00:55 - 01:42

....Is the deputy dancing????

[truemisto]

3rd times the charm means theyre tryin to hint at a darkseed 3

[GazzyW007]

Ding don the witch is dead, which old witch, the wicked witch, ding dong the wicked witch is deaad.

[FEfan56]

slowbeef went 2 over the intended video count.

heh you missed pal!

[epickirby]

@FEfan56

He actually counted correctly. The game truly ending with Dark World Mom's explanation. This is all just bonus stuff

[Aqueenoffairys]

And it turns out that Mike Dawson's best and only friend was himself.

[AeroAtlas]

@Aqueenoffairys and it killed him

[pieemperor]

In order to completely understand this game I believe we must first understand Bret Easton Ellis' masterpiece American Psycho. It does not matter whether what you viewed was true or if it was a screwed up series of crazy things in the protagonists head, the point is that reality frightens him, and that meaning in life is frightening to everyone thus he must destroy it. Anyways that's what I'm writing for my AP Lit Senior Thesis

[skittflash]

Wait, there are so many questions left unanswered! I don't understand! Maybe I need to watch Mike Dawson's mom's head explode again.

[Fyrsiel]

@skittflash Of course. That will explain everything.

[PTp1ranha]

I'm gonna go with something Diabetus said in another video. It's not so much about what anyone would have to say about Dark Seed 2, but rather... what have we learned from Dark Seed 2?

[BlackBeWhite2k7]

That said there are only four things that made the game any looking into (not actually playing it mind you, just looking into it).

1) Dark World Mom's explanation of everything (by leaps and fucking bounds)

2) You guys commentating on it

3) The game's hilariously awful dialogue/writing in general

4) Mike's girly fucking screaming and wailing (there really ought to have been more of that for humors sake)

[WhiteTiger225]

69 likes eh?

[RedSHARK6]

The death reel, finally!

[BlackBeWhite2k7]

I said it once and I'll say it again. To say that Cyberdreams took a shit on the real/original Mike Dawson would be an understatement.

They rather took a big fat steaming pile of Mike Dawson (Darkseed 2) all over Mike Dawson.

[RoyStorey]

@BlackBeWhite2k7 It's probably not true but I still have that theory that Dawson was such a huge dick before he left that his characterization in this game was revenge.

[BagOfMagicFood]

I'm intrigued by the repeated last names in the credits. Did they just hire the entire Hiebert and Vestergaard families as photography models?

I did recognize the life-force leech in the first game actually, when I read Slowbeef's Let's Play of it--he said it was in a room you don't need to enter. I suppose that makes DarkSeed special for Retsupurae, since I read it was Slowbeef's first LP ever, which also explains why he's forgotten a few things about it by now.

[TonyBranston]

but where's the bad techno and "making-of"?

[grindorblackout1986]

Well damn, awesome job getting correspondence with the creator Slowbeef.

[6Shooter28]

Wait, so the guys who adapted I Have No Mouth & I Must Scream also made Dark Seed 2? I think I've found my new favorite game developers.

[bobbyewing311]

3D artists.. to animate the inversely promotional MERRIORS lol

[salvo711]

Dead to Rights. And fuck Mike Dawn.

The eternal epilogues of retsupurae.

[salvo711]

5:36

Fucking brilliant.

[KajiGoku]

I'll miss this. But then again I really won't.

[ValisHD]

4:02 windows XP? O_o

[Physhi]

@ValisHD Yes.

[fastbreak333]

So either Jack is The Shapeshifter and Mike's Dark World counterpart or an alternate personality caused by Dissociative Identity Disorder? ...even the creators wanted to think Mike's a crazy loon.

[GeekMaladroit]

Thus ends the adventures of the world's most awkward manchild.

[Zknight7126]

*(Except Rita's role)

[Zknight7126]

My ending: Mike was a delusional single looser, Rita was a prostitute, the Sheriff's elbow was the shapeshifter, and Shrimp Baby was really the hero. Dr. Sims was the Ancient's agent to get Mike Dawson's genes to engineer the behemoth, but it ended in failure which created Dark World Mom. The ring toss was the holy shrine of Mike Dawson and he did his worship there, while the Bathroom turns out to make people high. It makes more sense than the original ending, plus most of it is unexpected. (Ex

[shoplifting1is1fun]

@Zknight7126

I knew that elbow looked shifty from the very beginning.

[AndrewTJ31]

I can't believe that they actually did show Jack with a motorcycle.

[Blaizerazer]

Despite how bad the game and longplayer were, I really enjoyed this rongpray. You guys kept me watching.

[MellowMink]

He got stabbed in the back, how the fuck is that a suicide?

[DarkArtistKaiser]

@MellowMink

This is coming from the same Sheriff who apparently had the evidence hes guilty, yet did nothing.

[SwordfighterRed]

@MellowMink Well, according to the autopsy...

"Doesn't matter. He's dead. Better off."

[KAOSHazmatt]

Please make a playlist out of this longplay so i can watch the whole thing, several times...

[tidusmi2]

@KAOSHazmatt watch it several times? Are you some sort of masochist?

[posthumanfetus]

I think Jack made up all that shit about being fake just to fuck with him. See, Mike Dawson is an idiot so he will believe anything. He is definitely the shape shifter, though. That's the only way this can make sense.

[creatorofGandP]

@posthumanfetus This is the true answer. The guy was darkworld mike so he got to be a non gullible, backstabbing, comb over having Dick that played Mike idiocy like a fiddle.

[PrickRolled]

A terrible ending to a horrible game.

[typomanbros]

In the words of Tom Servo, "Ok that was nice and all, just one small question: What the hell just happened?"

[Scoat]

Mike Dawson dying is the best start to a video ever.