Added: 4 years ago
From: AngryLittleGirI
Views: 46,230
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  • Lost 2 sizes with this...I shit u not!

  • Today was the day I do the arm portion of my workout routine, mostly using free weights. I got curious and did a little math and I determined that the sum of the weight I lifted in my workout routine today is approximately 9,230 pounds. No, I am not joking. The amazing thing about this is that I follow a thorough, but standard, workout routine; additionally, I’m not very strong for a man my size, perhaps a little above average but not unusually strong. People just don't want to lift that weight.

  • "exerting" not "exercising", I'm feeling you weren't being sarcastic when reading.:/

  • If your website has to claim their "secrets are 'true' and 'backed up by science'", chances are that they are neither. Especially with no sources.

  • ALL YOUR VIDEOS SUCK LEAVE YOUTUBE FOREVER YOUR account died. cant even get freedom of speech on your videos.

  • i saw that shit one night.... fuckin retarded...

  • thanks for the laugh

  • you're as cynical as a gen x-er in the 90's. So Mature

  • Some people will believe anything if you tell them it's a secret.

  • Huh..... if its true then I've been working out fro years! ^^

    lol....she is pointing to the search button.... wait.. hows that funny?

  • ok uhmm i watched another video and you actually do a workout without moving. she has her leg out and squeezes the muscle. She does 25 sets.

  • anybody else getting a creepy Vibe?

  • anyone who believes this shapely secret crap obviously doesn't know anything about physics. In order to create the twenty pounds of force you need an object that requires twenty pounds of force to move. Newton's Third law of motion describes this. It also doesn't work biologically because you can't force muscles against each other like that.

  • I wish I knew how old this girl was so I could tell if it was OK to be attracted to her virtually.

  • It's OK to be attracted to anyone of any age. A problem only occurs sometimes if you act on it.

  • This girl is a idiot...thats not what you do. She is cheap and doesnt want to buy the product to do good research...youtube is both a blessing and curse - everyone is an expert.

  • ur funnii lmao

  • um.. thats not the work out. i tried it and i lost 3 inches in 3 weeks.. and im actaully skinny now.. you use muscle against muscle.. not just standing there.. so i REALLY recomend it to people trying to lose weight. but you should shut up.. like ive always been a fan of this you.. but you dont know what youre talking about so stop talking about it. k, bye.

  • so if u know how to do the real exrcise then how do u do it? huh smarty lolz

    jk jk but seriously how/??!!!

  • Now imagine how much you would have lost if you actually did a real exercise.

    I understand the concept behind "motionless exercise", meaning just standing there flexing muscles basically. However, the lactic acid generated through this "motionless exercise" is exponentially less than real exercise, and does nothing for your NAD+ regeneration. So yes, you may burn a small amount of calories, but it's an inefficient way to work out.

  • by "lazy generation" do you mean you by doing motionless exercise? you'll still always be fat on the inside....face.

  • lol.

  • she's an idiot.......

  • This little angry girl doesn't know anything about Shapely Secrets. Will you please grow up little girl, don't talk about what you don't know!

  • hah. i'm just as confused.

  • hahahahahaha i sw this on tv and i almosy bought it as a joke for a dirty christmas party gift hahahhha

    great video

  • People voted for obama, what did you think they would have a hard time selling some silly videos to the public. It's called Isometric exercise and it's been around for years. Just google it for free (don't forget the DIET that goes with it) This infomerical is the same Con, as those TV preachers selling Gods secret to wealth for a fee, and you get a book, water or a piece of cloth in return. If there was a way they could market Peter's shadow they would sell it. Isaiah 45:19, John 18:20

  • Do you really think the John MacCain and Sarah Palin ticket was any smarter. They American people just went with the lesser of two evils.

  • yeah i kinda have trouble believing that you can lose a whole dress size by standing still they wasted 15 minutes of my life by trying to convince me to buy that BS...

  • you forgot to sit down. You need to be sitting for that exercise to work, preferably in front of a TV that is turned on.

  • and with a bag of doritos chips. You are my hero

  • I hope you aren't this uninteresting in real life.

    I was looking for info online because it looked so stupid on TV but then I found you and you are even worse.

  • Fail.

    You're (poorly) making fun of something that works as advertised.

  • your mom lost the weight because she ate less calories. The actual "exercise" program is completely bogus

  • haha! ur really funny! but this actually works. my mom wanted 2 try it 2 see if it worked and she lost like 20 pounds in two weeks! bt still, funny video! i know its true cuz i saw it on TV like gour times. it is on like evry night! haha

  • You are hilarious!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

  • She reminds me of Juno! Lmfao.

    So hilarious.

  • i saw an experiment involving two people. one would put their pinky finger in a tube and press against the sides and the other would put their pinky finger in a tube and think about pressing against the side. both showed increased muscle mass but of course the one who actually used the muscle had more growth. the point is that something like you described isn't totally far fetched. you could just stand there and flex all day without moving and get stronger. i guess you don't know everything

  • Got brains and looks, but that personality has got to go...

  • Dude, that is like the funniest thing I've ever heard.

  • YOU have got to go

  • Jessica, you've given us chronic somnambulent insomniacs hope for a better tomorrow!

  • Finally, I've been saying this for years now. It does makes sense. mind over matter.

    little confused though.. what was the infomercial selling exactly? don't buy anything, just pay attention.

  • well, its selling a video to help u understand and do the workout properly. its not just standing still, u stand ina certian posistion. okay, kinda tupid but it works real good! haha

  • I got a muscle you can work on.

  • Nice work think of all the poor people dying to loose weigh getting sucked in by this.

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  • hahahahahahahhahahahahahaha

    I want to join P.O.R.N.!!!

  • Your a snot!

  • That is all too funny, my ex used to swear by that exercise as she gained wait. She learned it from her sisters who were rather grotesque and obese.

  • HILARIOUS!!

  • u dont just stand like an idiot like u just did u stand in different positions flexing try it ....ignorance

  • hahah ignorance

  • i kno, i saw this too. so retarded

  • i saw that on a couple nights ago, actually. i was like..."oh great. now the world is gunna go lazy. either that, or they r gunna look like idiots just standing around doing nothing..er..at least thats what it looks like..."i wish it were true. but i doubt it.

  • Sorry but this time you FAILED.

  • lol. Your reaction is funny. IDk seems to easy to be true to me.

  • i get it she's flexing her pec's

  • I love you, Jessica.

  • it is not 7 minutes of standing still, you just aren't jumping around because there is no aerobics to it. it actually does work too.

  • Fat, crease and pucker are history with Metabolic Transformer 3066

  • haha. nice.

    it just came on and i had to see if it seriously worked.

    i really doubt it.

  • your sarcasim is genious...i love it!!!!

  • Since I couldn't comment on the Wake up vid, I''ll comment here. I'M GLAD I'M NOT A GIRL. I'd hate to go through that ritual everyday.

    As for this one it sounds like there is a sucker born every minute. Especially in your country.

  • Wow, what a load of shit. i so love her too

  • Sorry i sadi the wrong one. Jessica smiles in the "If you don't like my videos don't watch them" video

  • LOL

  • haha

    youre great...the way you saying.."uu..fancy word.." "uuh bad.." lovely...lovely

    Jessica keep the coming girl!!

  • Could you smile? Is there a video where I can see you smile? I've looked many and couldn't find one...

  • She smiles in the"Attention whore..." one :)

  • Retarded idiots never cease to amaze me, motionless exercise lol.... thats some funny shit

  • Jessica, you magnificent bastard!

  • lol...I could have used this as a reference for a paper in my health class for evaluating health and fitness claims in advertising...I actually wrote a song about a wheight training method that is the real deal called 'Circuit Training', check it out! I'm an absurdist btw...

  • After the tuneful clearing-of-the-throat I was helpless.

  • do you just stand there not even flexing your muscles? please reply

  • lol i so love her

  • i know oh man she's awesome.

  • WOW!

  • i SAW THiS ON TV... THE OTHER NiTE ACTUALLY. i WANT TO KNOW WHAT THE 7 SECRETS ARE.. AND iF THEY WORK. i KNOW ONE iS ABDOMiNiA BREATHING WORKOUT OF SOMESORT.... OOOOOH! LOL

  • It's when you have products such as these, that you know that the targeted audience is lacking in the intelligence department. You might ask, "well, why would you say that?" And my response would be, "because in order for them to stay in business, they'd need to be making enough profit, and that that profit is coming in through quite a group of people."

  • They're probably the same group of people who are on those shows where they're put to the test, advertising that a restaurant's water is a very fancy water that is more pure and tasty than any other kind of water, charging them as much as they can get. Then when they fill these glasses with garden hose water and return with them, these customers compliment the out-of-this-world water with, "Oh wow, now that IS really good water!"

  • what is the epic youtube challenge? seriously?! *confused*

  • you stink!

  • aww you sound cute when you cough!

  • wrestlers have use this for years...

  • OMG I'm so going to try this when I'm watching TV!! XDDD

  • While you sit, keep your back very strait. Then lean back a bit. Stay like this for a few minutes during class... at work... etc. Thanks anatomy class!

  • ya so i saw that infomercial too, what about the one you can do sitting?! XD is it the same as standing just sitting for 7minutes

  • You know, it's not that hard to believe this...standing and tensing your muscles does give you a workout. It isn't supposed to be a great workout that burns tons of calories, but if you did it for 7 minutes a day every day it would help you somewhat.

  • No one cares. No one cares. (You have to sing it)

  • i totally did that to and had it professionally printed. speaking of i think i'm going to go through all her videos this weekend and really take my time getting good pictures and make a second book. it's not bad cause it only cost about 150 to have printed in hardcover. i'll have to make a video on it.

  • hahaha i thought i was the only one to do this lol. i also made a jessica book and had it printed and i tell you, it's the best bathroom book i ever had. it would totally sell to. she is so beautiful.

  • That sounds about right.

  • If I were to ever go to the headquarters of the company that proposes such bullshit, I would be delighted to punch one of them in the face. Period.

  • LOL...Yes , I have watched this on TV , thinking the whole time ''what kinda shit will they come up with next'' ...anyone who would fall for this must be the most gullible person around .

  • MARRY MEEE!

  • Go to wiki and look up isometric exercise. I did. I presume the idea of this DVD is to "Flex" muscles as you stand there. Lets say muscle contracts 1/16 of an inch, so d = .0625". Lets also say the force of contraction is 3 pounds, then F = 3 lbf. Therefore work equals F x d = 0.015625 ft lb. The math could be continued to total Calories (food) per session. Their point is that a little adds up. This may not fight obesity, but any exercise is better than none.

  • Yeah, the airwaves/internet are loaded with garbage scams to fleece the gullible out of their cash. Just check out that fuck Trudeau.

  • First of all, diametric resistance exercise (that is the actual term use for that type of exercise) is hardly a new concept. It has actually been an idea that has been around at least since the 1970's or 60's or even earlier - I don't know for sure, as I don't claim to be an expert. But it is also largely agreed to be worthless by the actual experts. Your body needs to do work to get stronger and if distance = 0 then w = 0 too!

  • P.S. That is also the most adorable throat-clearing I've ever heard! (1:06)

  • This girl looks just like a young Geena Davis!

  • Valuable Input from this old person:

    The exact same thing was hawked all across the media way back in the 1960s. Only then it was called "isometric exercise".

    Everything old is new again.

  • no she is fat/plump call it what you will, i on the other hand am built perfect,end of dont reply.

  • Ok if all you do is stand still why would youu pay money to watch some old hag stand still on a dvd for 7 min? I need to come up with a good scam like this woman! Oh and by the way to all the people calling her fat. i bet your just some MORBIDLY OBESE person sittin their trying to look fit! If she loses any more weigh she will be anarexic.

  • Now all they need to do is come up with a full body work out I can do while i'm asleep in bed & i'll be on Easy Street.

  • quit fat, no not fat thats wrong plum yes you are plum, more exercising please lose that belly.

  • Hahaha! I love you.

  • thanks for making me look at some stupid womens add.

    are you sure that all you do is stand still ?

  • youtube com watch?v=_Ac_7EmYGXs nightee nightee!

  • Sweet sixteen going to church just to see the boys. Words of an old song remind me of you.

  • Diametric exercise actually works. Activities like pressing your hands hard against each other, pressing your thighs together, etc., work both muscles at the same time. It's really not that complicated a concept. My baby brother uses it all the time to help him focus. He's ADHD, and not only do diametrics help him work out a little, but they give him a way to release energy when he's in a place that requires him to sit still and stay focused.

  • that may be true but just standing still...come on now...

  • "Ooh big words, they must know what they're talking about." Sounds like every video you've posted on youtube. =|

  • Brings to mind the funny "Chair Butt" episode video at CubeNews1 dot com. Tense those butt muscles!

  • maybe take a personal training class and learn about diametric resistance, and other forms of static excercise.

  • This is probably one of the dumbest exercise plans I've ever heard of. Wow....

    The only critique I have about this video is that your speech seems a bit stilted and practiced. However, I've seen some of your recent stuff and it seems you're more comfortable in front of a camera.

    Really enjoyed a few of your vids. You make a good entertainer. :)

  • This is by far my most fav clip of yours! I was laughing the whole way through (well most of it).

    Im not gonna talk about how stupid the whole concept is, we both know that. Just gonna tell you that your doing a great job! And dont listen to the stupid people!!! ;)

  • thats pretty cool

    you pointed right at the description box where the code was

    thats kind of all i got out of that video

    it confused me

  • I can't imagine that any kind of strength you develop from not lifting would be as effective at doing the things you need to strength for, such as lifting.

    Unless they're talking about "working muscles against eachother" in the way I think they are... lol doubt it.

  • what do you think of the iraq situation??..9-11?..what about jessica simpson...alice iin wonderland..oceans 11..titanic..kobe bryant..sasquash..2008 election..music???

  • What are you doing wasting your time on you tube? Trapped in a video screen is no way to pass whatever message you're shooting for in all your videos.

  • Infact, this making mucles work against eachother is a technique martial arts masters use. Like if you imagine you push a heavy block with your arms but that there is only thin air. like moving your arm forward but resisting the movement as well.

  • Damn it! do they have this program for men???

  • wow girl i dont even get that high

  • omg how annoying do u wanna be!

  • i like her and i have seen a few other videos of her but could it be that she is a bit drunken in this video?

    anyway, nice video, but mainly because she looks beautiful ^^

  • ummmm think she's just tired. Looks like she made this at 2 or 3 in the morning.

  • That's dumb.

  • Bitch, you're not athletic at all! Drop and gimme twenty! Now! You can't expect people to fuck you just because of your cute face!

  • Again amazing comments from this guy. I'm following you around her videos, reading your hilarious commments!!

  • So, you're gay?

    No, no, it's cool. Nothing wrong with gay people, but if you're looking for a way to come out, don't do it by admitting you wouldn't have sex with a girl you just admitted was cute.

  • wat r u talking about

  • i know how ppl can loose weight! diet and excersize. even if u go on those diets TV offers (like nutrisystem) it stil means u gotta diet and excersize just look at the writing in the bottom. i like her sarcasm.

  • Amazing, I always understood that people from the USA were totally devoid of humour - however you are mildly amusing AND show signs of intelligence.

    I must report this to the rest of the world!

  • It does work. Bodybuilders use it to look more toned, as all their muscles are tense. However, its a stupid way to exercise for the following reasons:

    1. there is no cardiovascular exercise involved. not good for overall health

    2. it's a completely unnatural technique - it takes skill and practice to actually make muscles work against each other

    sad as this is, dude down there is right: a Nintendo Wii would actually be a better way of exercising.

  • this is truly hilarious

    people really do need to use their brains

  • Wow. An Informercial too? Do they just....Stand for seven minutes during it? xD

    Another wow to all the "Haters" on this comment page arguing your talents. It's amusingly pathetic.

    Anyway- Keep 'em coming. :D

  • Wow you're really bad. At attempting satire, at making good videos, at looking attractive; you're just overall bad.

  • Lol @ being satirical. She's young, she can't learn to be completely bitter, naturally, like the rest of us for a couple more years, sarcasm will have to suffice for now. =D

    She's letting us all in on the joke, which infact IS quite hilarious.. whereas this type of exercise WOULD actually work, it would still take as long as regular exercise without the added cardiovascular benefits.. therefore it can't really be deemed as exercise, just 'toning'.

  • Buy a Nintendo Wii - that'll do ya lol .. or you could get naked and roll around on the bed. That would help..

  • Must be the same guy that warned us about the dangers of Dihydrogen Monoxide

  • By definiton: Flexing is exercise O_O

  • You are the shittiest excuse for a satirist I have ever seen.

  • You either don't know what a satirist is, or I completely missed the part where she was writing something that was supposed to be satirical.

  • sat·ire (str)

    n.

    2. Irony, sarcasm, or caustic wit used to attack or expose folly, vice, or stupidity.

    She has other videos where she attempts and fails at satire, even recreating a David Cross bit from Arrested Development, because her condescending and irritating tone give her away every .5 seconds. Satire is subtlety, and she's as subtle as a land mine.

  • satirist

    sat·i·rist [sáttərist]

    (plural sat·i·rists)

    noun

    writer of satires: somebody who writes satirical works

    I think she attempts in the vast majority of her videos, however, I think she succeeds and manages to be quite funny. Just an opinion though, as is what you said.

  • hey, can someone comment on my higurashi no naku koro ni amv i uploaded an hour ago or something?  only watch it if you like/know wat naruto is...

  • wtf?thats impossible that i dont understand what im talking about!

  • i know this site, i think this woman reformed it from bodyflex(original title)

    boy, they sure got sued and it DOESNT work!!! check the ftc and look for body flex

  • i've tried it. it works. </sarcasm>

  • she has no idea what she is reading

  • "muscle against muscle" lol.we knew it.I like how you read this.funny.

  • ok what i dont get is that they people on the site tell you how to do the "exercise" so no one will buy the tapes if they want to use their "exercise"

  • I just stood up, what you do is clench all muscles you can for 7 minutes and it is fucktastically hard.

  • there r some retards out der .shit im getin addicted to this

  • bullshit lol (just do taichi that works)

  • So that means I can keep my fat MC'donalds ass sitting in the couch eating fried chicken, watching jerry springer and oprah and still become like Rambo ?!

    Where do I sign?

  • wuts funny is a bunch of ppl are gonna try this anyway

  • Sounds more like the secret to bullshitting on late night television. It's nothing more than a scam...