Added: 4 years ago
From: ChurchOfBlow
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  • Jesus. i feel bad being British. may i formally apologise for all the pretentious, stupidly accented pricks in England. sorry mate :(

  • this is a lod of shit takes the total piss out of english people. english people dot evan talk like that.

  • @1bowmaster1 I know! We realy don't talk like that. Apart from the accent.. brittish and americans pretty much act the same..

  • heh. I just pop'd over to good old wikipedia and i couldn't help but notice that 'mike' is full of shit as well I can't see his name on the writers list anywhere.

  • @heath2357 YOU'RE KIDDING! =U You sure? o.0 I think we've seen even Mike make a few appearances... he even looks like a twat! In any case you should still thumb it up. =3

  • 5 stars for the acting alone

  • What a crazy man.

  • It's a spigot not a fucking faucet!

  • you sound like an english/australian person!

  • Really funny video.

  • get seious and for once get paid bernard

    and work

    and come to wales and get a job with dr who

    fool

    mutters in best mr t accent

    fool !!!

  • Mike ........we want u

  • dunk slam!

  • Feeling the hate, lmao.

  • LOL who's the hater now? hmmm think about it

  • Cold... blablablablabla

    I'm English, it's not that bad.

  • nice peter cook/dudley moore voice

  • actually forsit or however you spell it in America is the american word for 'tap'. Same with drapes, they are called curtains. Purse is a handbag and americans are too dumb to even use english words so if your gonna speak english at least use it correctly. I don't mean to offend American people I'm jsut stating a fact.

  • for cocoking:

    you're using 'dumb' in the american sense. in the uk it means 'mute', not 'stupid'.

    but congrats on the rest - if only other brits could manage to tell the difference like you have, we'd be better off.

  • what the f*** are you talking about? Dumb means stupid, not mute. What part of England do you live in, New England? go and die.

  • Also; a purse is a womens wallet in England, "American" and "English" are spelt with capital letters, jsut is not a word as far as I am aware. As for curtains and drapes, what?

  • @rickyoswald actually original british meaning of dumb is mute!

  • hahaha

  • I'd really like to know, though, how much of this is real. Wether Mike is a real person or a character that's part of the comedy.

  • You my friend are a Wanker for having that facial hair.

  • It's for the Cornelius Blow character douche-fag. Bernard you are fucking amazing! WOOT!

  • i am british, your a wanker, im sure we all agree.

  • yup

  • nope

  • Oh. I love his british accent.

    He should try swedish. <3

  • I'd really like to see him do black.

  • hmm you pull video's off like this really well if it was anyone else it would apear bitter and sad. But you make it interesting and most people share your view's.

    I am british born but australian so i dont take offence of what you say as i considered myself australian but is it really nescesairy to make fun of a nation? Not complaining i found the accent gud.

  • LOL, yes us british people all speak like that xD LOL hahahaha. (i am british also, duh)

    the only people who would get offended by this is those british stuck up twats who act all posh. XD great vid dude. tis v funneh

  • noooooooooo dont do it

  • If you played Dr. Who, you'd be much better looking in my ever so humble opinion. lol

  • So what is this is offensice to Britain. I myself am British. Yet I don't give a shit if Mr. Smith here wishes to slag us off. Everyone has thier own opinions. If he doens't like Britain then good on him. He probably doens't liek Heavy metal either or listening to people bitch about him slagging off britain when he would rather read about his work and how his fans appriciate which, alot of us do so thats good. If he slags britain off let him lol. We slag off america alot anyway.

  • offensice, liek, doens't, appriciate. Any other words you feel like misspelling?

  • Lol I'll admit my typing is pretty bad. Sorry.

  • Go your own!!! :-D

  • this is affensive England isn't retarded like that no more it's 20th century dude get with the times

  • You lie! You wern't in a film?!

  • 3:40

    he said maybe ill be playing the doctor. that would be weird.

    I started watching Doctor Who because of ChurchOfBlow, I started all the way back at "An Unearthly Child" I try to watch 3 or 4 serials a week

  • YOU SUCK MIKE!!! the church of blow was the best thing that ever happened to youtube

  • You look extremely attractive with that beard and with that actitude... hehe

  • you wanker

  • Berny i find you fucking hilerious, however as a brit, i find you're ridiculouse stereotypicall british accent either slightly insulting (either for us brits or you americans as it shows the rediculouse notion that you're media seams to portray that we all speak frightfully upperclass, bah tis terrible *shakes head*) i could just be missing it and its a joke but still. Btw the fouth series of Doctor fucking who is rubbish compared to the other series, this explains it bah.

  • hey scotlands a part of britain too,  he was doin a english accent

  • yes but scotland and england haven't existed as soverin states for hundreds of years, not since the act of union creating the united kingdom of great britain and northern island, so england and scotland are just regions in great britain and if you want to get picky by saying its not scotish its english, then why not go the whole hog and try and pin it down to a particular district?

  • me no undastand you big words they scary

  • Muahahahaha the world is mine, no one can stop me

  • i bow down be4 ye oh mighty and powerful 1

  • Actually, you were correct about it being a joke and you missing it.

  • Muahahaha i knew it, well i didn't know it, but i knew that i knew there was someing i dind't know, if you catch my drift. Thank you for clearing it up Bernard you legend ;-)

  • Forogt to say, as its all a joke i missed, was there ever a mike? Dun dun dun derrrrrrr

  • No, there's no Mike, but there's no Bernard either. There IS a British writer and an American actor, but we're quite different from our screen counterparts. And yes, the accent was one big piss-take. I'm capable of...slightly better.

  • Yeah, it's painful. Worse than Dick Van Dyke's cockney accent in Mary Poppins and wanders all over. Yuck.

    Free jokes for yankies I guess. Any jokes about bad teeth I missed?

  • Bully funny!

  • it's funnier when he's sarcastic.

    :)

  • what episodes did mike write? if it was fires of pompei then i understand

  • lol class, well i for one thought that was absolutly brilliant, i wish you all the best in the future, im saddend to see Cornelius Blow go but all great things have an end. ohh and by the way, nice british impersonation, i am british and we do not talk like that but i think it would be a lot funnier if we did :D

  • y cant u b moar liek lisa nova durr

  • Ha ha funny.. although i must assure you. not all English peoples peak like they're just come out of 'A Clockwork Orange'. The 4th series of Doctor Who is on the air so, i have to agree with you, mike is a wanker!

  • Bloody good show old chap

  • Yay, the closested rage that boils so close to the surface is one of the more exciting forms of entertainment.

  • You Suck!

  • I'm british. WE DO NOT TALK LIKE THAT.

  • tape yourself and listen =)

  • lol! "i think he means the kind of exposure where u leave someone out in the cold to die" i was eating a sandwidge! u coudlve killed me! :P

    he's going to be writing Dr Who!? :O COOL! XD i mean... oh no... he is a w***er what a bad person i hope he burns in hell for abadoning u for a paying job...

    ... this is terrible

  • Gotta love the accent. And mike's a wanker.

  • i gotta say... your own written peices are much more accurately executed than the origional blow.

  • The tall one isnt nerdy...you must get confused easily...

  • "So yeah, whatever Michael, you're a lying sack of shit!"

    "Which is why I don't believe you, you're not good enough for tv."

    Wow, you sir have an excellent wit! Absolutely hilarious!

  • Who's Mike?

  • Dude, you're kind of scary when you're angry, but your still absolutely hilarious. And mike IS a wanker.

  • Mike really is a wanker!

  • jesus, man mike is a bastard!

  • He's kinda scary when he's mad. yet, hypnotic...I'd like to see more of this.

  • lol i loe this dude lol its not a tap its a foset!! lol its a tap in Ireland and Britain :D

  • what the heck is a faucet? (foset, faucet, it has no spelling!) seriously its a tap all around the world y is America calling it something longer? makes no sense....

    go ireland and britain! woot! thankyou for inventing and speaking english therefore knowing what things r called... thats pretty awesome :P

  • This guy has got a lot of talent,

    I'm definantly subscribing.

    Did I mention he's got a great sense of humour?

  • what no more blow aaaaaah that means i cant get in to blow heaven damit and what about the lizard monsters with out the bunker were all going to die

    p.s. mike is still a lizard monster

  • i'm english anfd your doing good mr smith ;), but ofc there are some assholes in england, just ask doc rusty XD

  • hehe.. wanker..

  • I'm swallowing a lot of pretention here.

  • lol i love this shit

  • Are you sure you don't have a script?

  • What does that mean??

  • It means that he's extremely funny for someone who's not using a prepared script.

  • I know i shouldn't laugh at this because this is probably real and a real argument, but i just love the witty commentary mid-message.

    Even when you're not acting your still funny Bernard! Nice!!

  • Too bad most people in England don't talk like that. In fact no one in England talks like that and if they do they would probably get the stuffing kick out of them in the street.

  • YES

  • PS: as I kept watching, and you said you were going to shave your beard, it made me sad.

  • I'm so glad your beard has grown out. It looks so fuzzy.

  • bullshit a phrase that i fukin adore lopl

  • Hey fuk the retard, he aint worth it!! :D hehe x

  • hilarous XD i dunno who this mike is but he sound really gay XD and i like the way u speak to him ahahahah Genius!

    <3

  • :'( the lizard monsters got to the writer

  • Aww it's a shame you two fell out!

    You made such a good show. Mike was right you know, the story was tied up nicely and trying to take it further would have detracted from it

  • lmao hilarious!

  • brilliant!

  • haha your english accent is funny.

    your broken sylables are hilarious.

    oh and im sorry but peep show is class.

  • I sincerly hope Mike felt PWNed when he saw you pull out that shaving gear xD Frickin' awesome man. Cheers.

  • Thats right, get him big boy.

  • It's a TAP but we don't have to faucet! Lol

  • you no right to call a guy a wronaker, when you don't look hot, but you what this isn't as good as how you sound now, do that looking good with your self dressed casual do you know what casual is?

  • dude ur a fucking fag learn how to speak

  • BWAHA I knew it! Good idea that Mike

  • as we say

    YOU SUCK

  • hey fuck tard

    if youtube suck

    then u SUCK aswell

    in his eyes

  • Look at it this way:

    Using your logic, he is also saying that he sucks as what you are commenting is a youtube video, and this all simply becomes a nice circle of hypocrisy.

    But not in a bad way, as long as we all accept it and move on. We have.  Now you need to as well.

    And then you'll be fine.

    The end.

  • oh u try 2 sound smart please.....

    he says that this is bullshit and his little movie with savage was like idk

    and this is all bullshit

    i say HURRAY Mike

  • I'm not trying to sound smart.

    I'm basically telling you to get over it, but sort of in a polite way.

    That's all.

    Because, surprisingly enough, it's not a big deal.

  • oh stfu

  • Good way to continue the drama, now that the 1st line of fictional charaters have 'died'

  • Aw, what an ass! Who would beleive him? I hate lying assholes. By the way, what film were you in with Fred Savage? I'd like to see it.

  • Yeah, I'd like to see it too! BWAHAHA!

  • Yes, shave, beards are horrible

  • More...Now

  • Wow, way to burn your bridges. I mean, I'm sure a lot of people sympathize and your comments as you read the email are pretty hilarious. And working for RTD on Doctor Who is pretty far-fetched... and why would he rub it in your face like that? Unless he was dangling the prospect of a cameo in front of you....

    Oh well. To be honest, I like your original stuff more than the Church of Blow stuff. -_-;

  • nicely scripted drama to kill blow

  • "Incredible, Mike...incredible...bullshit."

    Well that made me giggle.

  • Even his rages and rants are comedic.

  • No more Church of Blow? NOOOOOOOOO. He may say the scripts were badly written and the videos bordering on terrible, but classics such as episode 35 - 'The Visitor' will live on in comedy for ever!!!

  • fred savage ,the actor who played the mole guy in austin powers?

  • Right on!

  • ............Well someone is power tripping.....

  • you have ADD?

  • wow...your cranky. like...really cranky.

  • was that real? Or was that another fictional episode? ITS TOO HARD TO DECIPHER THE CODE

  • Geez all the British comments about this video and how it's taking the mick out of us is just really silly. We do the VERY SAME on TV, in England, in the USA, in bloody Russia probably. Everyone makes fun of someone, it's how they use the humour. I do not find this offensive, it's acting. (And if not then it's just plain funny anyway!) Thank you.

  • Hah!

    Reminds me of Extras.

  • Grizzly...

  • you suck, lmao u have funny vids

  • we dont all have a english accent like that anymore lol

  • yes you do.

  • cheers...for slagging the word tap.

  • OMG... the point of no return

  • Mike is a wanker,

    we aint all like him in England.

  • cool, i didn't know british people use the word "aint".

  • GIVE ME MY 5 MINUTES BACK! YOU TALENTLESS HACK! xD YOU SUCK!

    lol

  • is that a picture of phinoccio behind him...?

  • lol whos fred savage?

  • another child actor who never really made it when he grew up. He's best known for playing the lead role on the tv show The Wonder Years

  • is this serious

  • i think this might be...

  • its still scripted.

  • hes reading an email

  • The point is that this is still a script. If you can't understand that then whatever. Believe what you want.

  • i know but its still entertaining anyway =)

  • naw

  • im from england. i find this guy hilarious, oh and the tall one from peepshow is more of a stoner. the small fat one is the nerd.

    its a tap...

  • england rulez...

  • second

  • nothing

  • lol, ur new videos are ALOT better soooo i gusse this was a good thing lol

  • I love this shit...love it man - keep it going. Need to take you along with me the next time someone needs a good "bitch slap'n".

  • pwnage XD

  • very funny work

    i hope people wouldn't take accents so seriously as comedy is supposed to challenge things which are considered "taboo" such as racism (not that the point of this video was to make fun of the british anyways)

    just wondering though

    is all your work including the videos where you get angry at mike scripted or is some of it actually serious? because some of these videos got more views than the church of blow vids.

    oh and you suck

  • YOU SUCK

  • this is funny i applaud you..now please say herbs

  • It's a tap.

  • gl sorry for this dumbass trying to look cool ... stilll what ive seen so far and your new stuff alone is great

  • People, people, people. I'm British, I'm not racist at all, and I think this guy is really funny in the videos he makes. I can take the piss out of myself, we all should be able to. Who cares if someone is American, British, black, white, whatever man. If they're funny, they're funny, and we all need to stop taking things so damn seriously.

  • It IS tap. End of story.

  • fuck u u sak o shit americans search AMERICANS ARE NOT STUPID ON YOUTUBE u fuckin dumasses didnt even no if u were in vietnam or not so go fuck urselfs im a londoner and that was blatently a american tryin 2 b british. we r better than u and we made u. yes u are just the horrible mistake of our sex with the dutch.

    fuck u go eat urselfs 2 death u fat peices of shit.

    p.s no1 in england sez tip tip or jolly good show

    p.p.s i still think this guys other stuffs funny

    p.p.p.s go fuck urselfs

  • It is fucking hilarious to read your comment about how americans are stupid when you can't spell worth shit and after watching the video thought he was trying to act british. Anyone with half a brain could tell he's mocking Mike by trying to sound british. By the way, you didn't make americans. We are not some weird offspring of dutch who were born wanting to seperate from the monarchy. We were british who got tired of being overtaxed.

  • dint say we invented u dont we invented the language. n e way y the fuk r u givin me a history lesson u dick so piss of n fight ur own war. p.s agree that its funny

  • Of course you didnt say you invented americans, neither did I say you didnt. I said that Neonbrain333(The person I replied to) was wrong in saying "we r better than u and we made u." Pay more attention and stop slaughtering the language which you apparently "invented" by shortening already short words to make yourself sound even more like a preteen asshole.

  • sorry then i appoligise. but yh we did invet it why the fuk do u think its called english.and how can i be slaughtering it wen this isnt even english its gramaticlly correct term is txt language. so shuv that up ur arse.

  • Who the fuck taught you that pile of horse shit. What you call txt language is just gramatically incorrect english and there is no correct term for it other then lazyness.

  • calm down. british pplpay out americans 2 and you both pay out australians and lost of other countries. if you complain its just hypocritical

  • its a fucking joke dumbass

  • yer mate see where ur commin from but atleast we can do them allot better lol n austrailians are easy targets

  • fag hack

  • it never sounded like a british accent,defo sounded like an aussie accent

  • Let's face it, the British are assholes. I don't like to be racist, but what the fuck is the Brit's problem here? He's not perfect, but should he be? Jesus Christ. He wasn't trying to be realistic. It's fucking comedy. I figure most Brits would laugh, but noo, you have an American doing it and they want to spit and piss all over it. Fucking retards.

  • You do realise the whole things a piss take? His name isn't really Bernard Smith (that's Smith with an "i"). You have the entire world infront of you in web form, do a bit of digging, investigate! And by the way, even though you "don't like to be racist" your whole post does make you a racist, it was racist right from the first comment. You're making a fool of yourself over a fictional character mate!