FEMINISM, MARRIAGE, INDEPENDENCE & ISLAM: MUSLIMAH PERSPECTIVE

[TaioLuv]

A woman should be able to take care of herself before she gets married.

[TaioLuv]

Being honest I respect you all for wearing hijab. I will not wear hijab. I will dress modest at all times

[iOutComei]

The one on the left side is a ninja :D haha am sorry could not resist! Yes i agree religion is not culture. People put islam and religion together and turn it in an ungly thing. I am a muslim and i do agree in some muslim countries women are treated unfair. I dont know man all i know is am not getting married till am mature and old enough to be in a relationship, maybe arround age 30. Anything before that just ends up in darma and getting divorce and what not.

[Fabmuxgrlxxx]

It is possible to have your own income to take care of yourself and you don't have to have children if you don't want to and your husband does because you're the one who's tending to that child 24h of your life and he should take your feelings, health, and sanity, and wants under consideration.

[Fabmuxgrlxxx]

New converts who watch videos encouraging women to be this way and brainwashing them into thinking this is all they could ever have going for them turn away because this is not the way you should befriend open minded down to earth real people first then Muslims because you don't wanna get into this if you do you'll see exactly what I'm talking about and why I say it.

[Fabmuxgrlxxx]

But if you like being submissive and not being listened to nabi says a husband and wife will dispute over many but the husband has the last word. So if you enjoy playing the role of the timid I live to please my husband women you need to realize that you matter and you're worth more than what you think besides by behaving this way knowing its really not who you are you're doing serious damage to yourself by lying to yourself and others. Wouldn't you rather be yourself? Instead of the person som

[Fabmuxgrlxxx]

I'm not married but if I ever for what reason deside to get married I will marry someone like me outgoing strong personality likes to have fun do other things beside staying at home cooking rubbing his feet. A Muslim wife should not give to her husband because of his title as her husband she should give to the person because that's who you fell in love with right? Your marriage can be whatever you want it to be not all Muslim marriages have to be traditional.

[Fabmuxgrlxxx]

Nabi says it is preferred for a muslim women to wear a niqab (face cover) but if she doesn't no sin upon her. Just a thought I'm thinking you wear it because your husband told you too.

[Fabmuxgrlxxx]

@Queentudor4 I couldn't agree with your comments more

[Fabmuxgrlxxx]

I'm a Muslim girl and I have too say it really bothers me that most Muslims feel they have too point out the so called wrong a muslim is doing you need to realize that the wrong a Muslim does is between them and Allah the creator not the creation.

[HotChocolateDivaaah]

Women & men must be submissive to GOD. And not a woman to her husband!

[KpopManiacSFL]

Why do so much people equate marriage with money and cooking? Can't people marry&have children just bc they love and respect each other? Why is it that you HAVE to find a husband because you NEED someone to pay for your rent, clothing, children's education etc and you HAVE to have a wife to cook, clean, etc? That makes marriage seem less funny and enjoyable! It's like you HAVE to find a career only based on money and not for quality, ability&enjoyment. Wife =/= cook and Husband =/= bank teller!~

[Cuddlebunzzzz]

@KpopManiacSFL because there are many people who marry just for those reasons. throughout history, marriages have been conducted for business purposes, whether it's to strengthen the family bloodline or to find a man/woman to play those roles you mentioned. love didn't become a part of marriage until western civilization started becoming more secular. it's very possible to love someone and not marry them too, so there's no point in marrying solely out of love.

[morenabella13]

Why are your videos so dark now & where is all your pretty makeup? What happened to you guys? Did you cave under all the criticism you were receiving from other Muslims because you were too attractive? (ie: shouldnt show your face, shouldnt wear bright colors or make up).

You 2 look like two COMPLETELY different women then when you first started posting. You are American women who obviously CHOSE this way of life, and I respect that, but it makes me sad for you. Still wish you the best!

[SeeSeeFbaby]

@morenabella13 Like she aid in the video before that NO ONE FORCED HER !! she was always wanted to try it soo to said that is wrong .. i really respect her for that im just like her new converter and to say its really hard from the non muslims u get looked and and asked if u get forced and for some muslim its not enough the way u dress or what so ever omg pleasee give people a break its there own decision how and what there wearing if she feels good like that then leave her alone

[BionicWeapon123]

FUCK FEMINISM.IT WAS MADE UP BY THE DEVIL

[bcheato1]

GREAT JOB SISTAHS!!!!! I HAVE ONLY BEEN MUSLIM A YEAR AND IT IS HARD TO SEPARATE CULTURE AND RELIGION PLEASE PRAY FOR SISTERS LIKE ME

[hundre1muslima]

I LOVE U SISTER MAY ALLAH BLESS U AND UR FAMILY

[WeatherMondacicci]

I choose not to get married, plus I am a lesbian though I have never been in a relationship. The reason is that I have seen my sister get mistreated by men and also my mother is married to an alcoholic that mistreats her. I'm not a lesbian because of that since I was known to have those tendencies since I was little. I am also socially phobic (thanks Asperger's) and I don't trust people, not to mention that I am not into commitments like this.

[barbaras1948]

so phoney.



[mandlbakr]

@barbaras1948 f----k off

[ammanxix]

I totally agree

[cherryblueskies1]

It's not because you're not married that you're a feminist! Woah can we slow down with the judgement...? Feminist is a strong wrong. And I don't believe a woman needs a man as much as a man needs a woman. TONS of women in modern society raise kids on their own and work & earn money on their own, simultaneously. Men need to be 'taken care of' but women, if the circumstances are as such, can deal with more competence.

[Faavor]

Salaam sisters your points are good, yet most of those who are not in guidance from Allah, will find it hard to keep up with the standards of society what the role of husband and wife are. One of the most important role of an eligable husband is leadership and respect for the direction of Allah which is over anything we expect from both husband and wife. Quran and sunnah are clear guide toward right direction. Masha Allah, muslimahs remind Muslimahs as brothers are to as well.

[MsBronxprincess]

however her husband jaylyrikal is still making vids on youtube... the double standard.

that why i do what i does cuz i cant stand that unfair sh!T.

u can do it but i cant. WTF?

[MsBronxprincess]

i guess hubby said ..."no more youtube" (i.e last video recorded 8/5/10)

[longliveislam94]

I undertsand ur view but you must understand that the muslim society is modernizing and alot of people dont think that way anymore. Some women just dont want to get married doesnt mean they are feminists but they have their own beliefs. Islam does not require women to marry so stop giving the rest of the world that idea and enhancing the stereotypes we already have to face

[CocoaBrownSkinLady]

@longliveislam94 According 2 Imams Abu Hanifah, Ahmad ibn Hanbal & Malik ibn Anas, marriage is recommended, however for certain individuals it becomes Wajib. Imam Shafi'i considered it to be nafl or mubah (preferable). General opinion: if a person fears that if he/she doesn't marry they will commit Zina then marriage becomes obligatory. If a person has strong sexual urges then it becomes obligatory for that person to marry. It shouldn't be put off or delayed esp. if one has the means to do so.

[CocoaBrownSkinLady]

@longliveislam94 A man, however should not marry if he does not possess the means to maintain a wife and future family, if he will not consummate the marriage, if he dislikes children, or if he feels marriage will seriously affect his religious obligation. The general rule is that the Prophet (pbuh) enjoined people to marry. He said "When one marries, they have fulfilled half of their religion , so let them fear God regarding the remaining half." Narrated by Anas ibn Malik

[Nouri8885]

no one is indepentant we all need Allah, and we all depend on the society, our houses were built by someone, our vegetables are grown by farmers, our meat is slaughtered by butchers, our electric, water supply, doctors etc... therefore everyone depends on each other, the issue is about we need to allow others to depend on us more and be dependable, and also we need to depend on Allah, and also be able to do somethings for ourselves, and not expect everything to be done by others.

[toggerrie]

You can be an independent woman and a good Muslimah. Islaam encourages you to be an independent woman, contrary to popular (non-Muslim and apparently Muslim) belief. This is sad.

[QueenTudor4]

@wickedman6

feminism gave women rights, places to go if their spouses are abusive and councelling after managing to escape from bad relationships. Looking at the so called 'muslim' world I think they need it

[QueenTudor4]

you can still be an independant woman and a good muslim. A woman's place is not just in the home. God gave woman a mind and she should use it. You can still respect your husband in a household and be successful in many other aspects. Just because one has a vagina does not mean you belong in a kitchen, pop out as many children as you can and stay away from society. Women are powerful beings and God blessed us with the power of multi-tasking. Just face it, men are idiots.

[ally786]

salam sisters i completely understand what your saying about the role of women and men being different. Allah has created man and women different and therefore has specified different roles for that reason so that the family unit can function well. its like the sun only comes out during the day and the moon during the night..this doesnt mean the sun is better than the moon or vise versa..it just means they have two different roles so that they can fulfill their purpose of night and day.

[salamsabee]

He has to seperate the bed and you can't stay mad for more then 3 days. After three days you must both discuess the situation. Some brothers take that and simply abuse you. I have learned that you must understand your religion and rights before you run off and marru a brother, Always have a back up just in case he goes crazy. Now the stop praying and not wearing hjab usuallay seals the deal with most muslim men, you can't be with someone who doesn't pray.I learned, but some sisters havent.

[MohammedTheBabyRaper]

@salamsabee 'He has to seperate the bed and you can't stay mad for more then 3 days. After three days you must both discuess the situation.'

Not according to the Koran:

"Men have authority over women, for that Allah has preferred in bounty one of them over another, and for that they have expended of their property. Righteous women and therefore obedient.... and those your fear may be rebellious, admonish them to their couches, and beat them." Sura 4:34

Disputing the Koran is a death sentence.

[Pentapus1024]

Is it ok for you husband to beat you if you do something he doesn't like? What happens if you break a rule? Do you ever lament the relative freedom of secular society? What is it like to have to answer to someone who is not god or government in so many ways? Does limiting your experiencing of life make you feel safe in that it simplifies the cosmic confusion that is human existence? What was it that steered you to this particular belief system if you were not born into it? So many questions...

[WiseNubianPolygny1]

I am seeking sisters who are 20 years younger then me to have children to work in my busness with me and to take part in my cuilture

[WiseNubianPolygny1]

Assalamu Alaikum are yoou two sister married yet?

[PSYONCYAN7]

Sisters, You have really nice perspectives on feminism and marriage. I wish you 2 could get your own television show. You are so wise with a taste of wisdom. I wish you sisters all the best.

[missstrawberryx]

Also @RacyReggie

Have you ever heard of maternity leave? Where I live there is also paternity leave.( I don't live in the u.s.)

[missstrawberryx]

@RacyReggie

A man can do just a good job at raising a child as a woman can. A mother and a father both can experience guilt of leaving a child while they work.

No right mother or father would ever neglect their parenting duties by working.

You need to stop being so prejustice of the western society which I presume you live in.

[RacyReggie]

I definitely agree with the points raised in this discussion regardin the roles played by fathers and mothers. It is human nature that the female rears the child from birth and onto infancy. We may hear our non-muslim sisters or western feminists bang on about EQUALITY but even these women experience guilt and failure as nurturers if they were to neglect ALL maternal responsibilities at such an early stage in order to fulfill career or breadwinner occupations

[jaggar14]

god bless you all

[1fattgirlmah1]

As salamu Alaikum Its good to see that the make up is gone and ur married. Shows that u are learning more which is always good. I just got married November 27.

[seetv569]

Part 1: @dinavienna: ASA sis, I actually disagree with your view point. Allah has indeed instructed men to be the leader of their families. Being head of the house does not clash with "partnership in a marriage." Actually it is quite the opposite. A leader cannot lead without consulting & receiving counsel from his family; namely his wife. Muhammad (pbuh) never led without taking counsel from his companions or wives. And he is the ultimate & best leader humanity has ever & will ever see.

[seetv569]

Part 2: @dinavienna: Remember, it was his wife Umm Salamah who he went to & asked for guidance & advice on how to handle the tense situation during the treaty of Hudaybiyya. And alhumdulilah she provided excellent counsel to our Prophet (pbuh) & he FOLLOWED her counsel. A husband being head of house does not mean the husband is to be "the boss" of the wife teller her how high to jump, no. It means that Allah has placed a HUGE responsibility in the hands of a man; having man get up & take

[seetv569]

Part 3: @dinavienna: responsibility for the welfare of his family's needs in all matters: worldly & spiritually. Laziness & irresponsibility of men is not allowed in Islam. This is a wise decree from Allah that benefits women & children so that women with children are not burdened with lazy & irresponsible men. This is why it is utterly important for women to marry men who fear Allah; thus there is comfort for the woman if she decides to get pregnant from this man; comfort & a sense of security

[seetv569]

Part 4: @dinavienna: in knowing that this man will "man up" & take on his role assigned by Allah. This God given responsibility is HUGE & men will be questioned on how they performed their duties towards their wife & family on The Day of Judgment. Many women commenting here who speak out against the leadership role of men with their families seem to be completely overlooking the wisdom behind Allah's decree. And to argue a view point that goes against Allah's decree brings about the perception

[seetv569]

Part 5: @dinavienna: that these women somehow know better than Allah the All Knowing. Astagfurlah! Let us just chalk it up as these women having good hearts but simply misunderstanding the wisdom & guidance of Allah's decree & guidance. Allah would never give such a responsibility as leadership to men & use Muhammad (pbuh) as an example of the perfect leader if there was not wisdom behind it. Allah is the All Knowing & we must humble ourselves & never forget that. To be a leader requires

[seetv569]

Part 6: @dinavienna: enormous patience, caring & listening skills. In leadership there is also give & take. And in a marriage a husband will always have to consult his wife in how to lead the family. There is no other way, and this, to take counsel from one's wife, is the Sunnah of our beloved Prophet Muhammad (pbuh). This is the role that Allah has designated men, & women are a compliment to a man's leadership role. If a woman is single & chooses to remain alone, then yes, she is leader

[seetv569]

Part 7: @dinavienna: in her own home. But if she is married & truly desires to submit to Allah, then the Sunnah is to observe patience & let her husband lead while offering her input when necessary & when asked for & this will be often because we men definitely do not know it all. Men must also submit to Allah by asking of their wives for input & help because this is clearly the Sunnah of our Prophet (pbuh). Again, the role of husband & wife require great great patience on each's part,

[seetv569]

Part 8: @dinavienna: but a husband cannot lead without a helping partner. A woman who refuses to let her husband lead & a man who refuses to take counsel from his wife, then each indeed may be a fitna for the other in a marriage. Allah says in the Quran that He places within a marriage sequina (peace) and mawadah (a deep understanding & patient love) between husband & wife. This can only truly come about when men & women know their roles & perform it dutifully for the sake of Allah.

[seetv569]

Part 9: @dinavienna: I commend the sisters who posted this video, they have a strong understanding of their deen & clearly are on the right path. May Allah give you, my dear sisters, and all of us tawfiq. And in the end, Allah knows best.

Your brother in Islam, Salaam!

[elfdude06]

I agree with you that a marriage is about partnership, and there are sacrifices, and you have roles. However, that really has little to do with religion, and more to do with people's personal decisions.

Fact is, you can be in a messed up relationship/marriage regardless of whether you believe in God or not. Therefore, I would say it is RELIGION that should be kept away from the rest. Don't isolate yourself (and your family) from your culture.

[shandaya2004]

salam alaikum sisters,

thank you for making this video as well as others im new to islam, your videos help me alot as a muslim sister once again thanks.

[ONMYWAYTOZION29]

What would you say about Mohammad wife? She was a business women.  By the way I enjoy seeing your videos.

[KpopManiacSFL]

@ONMYWAYTOZION29 Or Aisha for educating herself to be a scholar and lawyer?

[ONMYWAYTOZION29]

What would you say about Mohammad wife. She was a business women.

[LlortAmaIx]

Oh god, look at these Muslims...They already look like they're about to go blow something up. This video is nonsense.

[wishywashygirl19]

I agree with you completely 70% of black families are broken homes or single family homes which also results in higher risk of teen pregnancy. That is crazy for a women to act totally independent they maybe able to take care themselves and their children it would be much easier to to have two people working towards raising children.

[LlortAmaIx]

@wishywashygirl19 99% of all statistics are made up on the spot.

[QueenTudor4]

@wishywashygirl19

um why are you blaming the women for being independant? Also remember the boys that GOT those girls knocked up, they are equally to blame for this 'independance.' In reality it has nothing to do with that. Depends on how you were raised, the people you mingle with and your self restraint in order to make good choices

[elgammal5]

nice video sisters

[arfanullah]

A Muslim wife is a back bone of the man... when a Muslim man get married, its his solo purpose at this time in his life to server and provide for his wife and family. Your wife is your counselor, honor, and treasure. This is Islamic way of life.

[wahidislam]

subhanAllah whats with the music...

[ilovejellybeans3]

WHOAH! Whats with all the muhammad (pbuh) bashing comments, like idk why people waste there time. Anyways great video girls. I agree.

[00ismaeL001]

@ilovejellybeans3 Because it is true. Do the research and open your eyes to the truth.

[00ismaeL001]

Muhammad said if a strange man enters your house YOU, as woman have to give your breasts to the strange man to suckle so he will get to know you and be in your 'family'...uh...why?

Muhammad was a slave trader and slave owner by trade.

[vincerashaad]

@00ismaeL001 so was Thomas Jefferson. TJ even sold his ebony wife who gave him 5 kids starting at 14 after he died in his will. A slave is an individual who does not cherish his freedom or else he would shed his blood and give his life to free himself. Slavery is the fault of the slave in my view.

[00ismaeL001]

Muhammad STOLE his adopted son's wife and lusted after her. Aysha said something like "dang, your god sure gives you whatever you want".

Aysha said that Muhammad was possessed by a demon put upon him by a magician. How could a mere man put a spell on Muhammad? Thats cuz he was not a prophet.

[vincerashaad]

@00ismaeL001 King Saul was involved with divination. He even spoke to a shapeshifting demon after Samuel died. The demon told of both him and his son's death and it came true as both were massacred by the Phillistines,

[00ismaeL001]

Muhammad was possessed by Shaitan TWICE when he was the prophet. Muhammad also tried to kill himself SEVERAL TIMES when Satan...I mean the Angel Gabriel revealed himself to him.

You can't have feminism in Islam...disobedient women GO TO HELL IN ISLAM.

[xtremeownage2]

No. You are a liar and a deceiver. The holy and pure Prophet Muhammad (SAW/PBUH) is not as you say and never did as you are saying. The truth is that the holy, pure, perfect, and infallible Prophet Muhammad (SAW/Peace be upon him) Is the MOST honourable, righteous, pious, kind, sincere, handsome, humble, pure, intelligent, honest, modest, knowledgeable, and GREATEST of all God's creation! The closest one to God Almighty is the holy and pure Prophet Muhammad (SAW/PBUH)! Alhamdulillah!

[00ismaeL001]

Muhammad said that Hell is filled mostly with women, women who disobey their husbands. In Muslim heaven your man gets 72 WHITE virgins...sorry no 'sisters' for your Muslim man in Islamic jannah.

[untouchableali]

mashallah sisters by allah you guys are doing a beautiful job! so much truth i hope to find a wife that has the same values! wassalam

[sam3314]

Oh wow I was searching for the truth and stumbled upon this. hmm islam is definately a religion of peace and equality. It just makes me want to run down to the next niqab shop on the block. (Note my sarcasm)

[Msluckycharms101]

what is the song at the begining?

[precosious5150]

Asalam Alaikum sister

I have a question, I am a new niqabi and have started wearing the niqab. I have been wearing niqab going on day 3. My question is what do you wear with the niqab? Do you have to wear the abaya? Or can I just pretty much wear anything I want to as long as it is modest and not bearing flesh? Like for example a nice free flowing (not tight) silk blouse which is not see through, and my chest and neck are not exposed, but it has sort sleeves, so I use sleeves.

[precosious5150]

@precosios5150 I use sleeves which I purchased online that I can put on my arms so you can not see my arms, with a nice pare of loose fitting slacks (not jeans) that are not tight and you can not see my curves. So with me being fully covered from head to toe in loose fitting clothes to where my curves or the impression of my body is not showing is this ok while wearing niqab? ShukranJazeelak sister for your help may Allah bless you and yours. Ma'a Saalama

[kkreyolita]

Vraiment dommage tout çà, à croire qu'ils ne savent pas que les arabes détestent énormément les noirs...

[mer1ve]

i love all the topics you talk about its interesting :)

[salamsabee]

Having gone through hell within my own marriage, I was defendless because I had no money. I was looking for a job, but was basically at his mercy. My father always told me make sure you have your own money before you marry a man. when you have nobody to help you, you can escape a bad situation. Many men within our community do not understand how to take care of their women. They provide shelter, but the rest is chaos. Sisters, if you have no family, make sure you have a back up just in case

[salamsabee]

@salamsabee things should go sour. How hopeless of a life you will have if you are at your husbands mercy. I agree that the husband is responsible for my up keeping, but be mart in 2010 and have your paper and friends ready to help you if things should go bad. So many sisters are left hopless on the streets and another sister can't help her because she can't bring her around her husband. Be prepared, because when it rains, it pours sisters. Dont ever give a human being all of the power.

[salamsabee]

@salamsabee

get your education and some work experience. Make sure that ou just don't have a degree and nothing to really show for it. This is 2010, and lets be real, what couple can live off one salary without being on a tight budget.Once the children come, I agree that it is best to stay home, but if you can, try to at least hold down a part time job. Don't pop out 100 babies and get left in the cold when things go bad. Just be smart ladies, this isn't saudi Arabia.

[samolakisses]

@salamsabee no use naming a place, thats anywhere.

[MsBronxprincess]

@salamsabee yes you couldnt have said it no better than that and let me tell you that most practicing brothers are scared of sisters that work,in college and have her own way before he came on the scene. they be scared to death for what i dont know but that is why i dont deal with the brothers even though im a muslimah because i need someone who will respect the fact that im my olwn person and for especially how hard i worked for the things i have you darn right im gonna enjoy it!

[MsBronxprincess]

@salamsabee it's doomed to fail anyway cuz let's say for an example your iman get low, then so will your husband's love because remember everything was based off of religion in the first place.or you decide to stop praying or wearing the hijab or whatever it is then he kicks you out the bed and dont wanna talk to you...so you see where this is going? but salamsabee i am happy to see that you have lived and learned from your mistakes cuz i feel exactly the same way you feel

[MsBronxprincess]

@salamsabee yes girl yes NOW YOU NEed TO MAKE RESPonse VIDEO CUZ THIS is definitailty how i see it .

but right no they in the honeymoon period of thier marraige lol.

i just cut out the brothers all together someothing in my heart tell me that i'll end up marrying my college sweetheart someone with like values who will allow me my freedom to wear what i want and there will be no coercion or force just natural love based off of a chemistry not off of religion. and if it's based of religion i

[Briwyn]

Great video, I clicked on it because I'm learning. I'm a stay at home mom, but I married my husband 9 years before I even started studying Islam. Nothing really conflicts for me between the two (although he isn't thrilled about me studying it). The only problem I really have is that I see on some sites that it says women aren't as smart as men, or other things that aren't very nice. That's the only thing that makes me think Islam isn't right for me. I enjoy your videos though :) Thank you!

[flowerpower016]

@Briwyn well when you say you saw websites saying women aren't as smart as men, you should know, true islam does not say that, women are allowed knowledge just as much as men, Islam does not say men are smarter, and women are allowed to work, i'd say if a website says things like that about a women then it isnt right or accuret and you shouldnt use that site. i have several websites you can check out if you want, they are reliable as much as i have read from them so far. Good luck.

[Briwyn]

@flowerpower016 Thanks :) If you want to send me a message with those sites, I think you can. I would be grateful. Like I mentioned to someone else, I don't want to give up on Islam. I need to find the reasons again that brought me to it. :(

[flowerpower016]

@Briwyn I'll try when i can cause my laptop was bent in a car accedent (Alhamdulillah I am alive) so i cant get them from my favorites right now, but mabe i have it on my usb, if i do i can send you them soon. And you're welcome, i am always happy to share Islam with others, i always hope others will see the real beauty of Islam, but it sadly seems most people dont even fully understand how religions work.

[samolakisses]

@Briwyn which site said that?! please be careful of what you find online. for every true site speaking of how Islam really is, are 100 negative ones and if you're studying at home and not talking to practicing muslims you will get confused. and it has nothing to do with intelligence. there's all kinds of content online that make it seem islamic and it's meant to deter ppl from studying correctly. there r false hadiths, etc. watever u were reading, wz NOT islam.

[Briwyn]

@samolakisses That's what worried me. It was actually a forum, there's some great people there, but many of the brothers there don't have nice things to say about women (They could easily be cultural bias against women, but they try to support their views with the Qur'an). Thank you for your post, I just really don't want to give up on Islam. :(

[BlackWomanDeen]

ASA I have a question. What happens if a woman is married and her husband isnt taking care of her the way shes used to? Or what happens is a single woman is looking for a husband, but most of the men in her community have the mindset of not providing the way they should.

[samolakisses]

@BlackWomanDeen idk who this question is meant 4, but ill giv my answer lol. if it's at the point where the husband is making it difficult for the woman to strive in the way of Allah (SWT) then she shouldnt stay w/ him. ours isnt a sacrament, but a simple contract between 2 ppl. still, divorce shud b a last resort. if its simply about materialism and the woman is being shallow or unreasonable, it's not the man's fault n ive heard a lot of immature sisters talking about...

[BlackWomanDeen]

@samolakisses The question was misunderstood...

[samolakisses]

@BlackWomanDeen ...jewelry or watever. a woman shud hav sum idea of wat she's getting in2 b4 she marries a particular man. im single and im in no rush 2 find a spouse. insha'allah i will find a good man, but im not holding my breath lol. Allah knows all and he knws best in every situation so im not worried at all. but im also not 1 of those women looking 2 b cared 4 either, im not a damsel in distress, i actually dnt "need" a man, but Allah sez 4 us 2 b married n if it's meant 2 b, itll happen.

[samolakisses]

As a woman you also have to think of the downside to life. What if your husband dies? What if he becomes ill for a long period of time? What if you can't have children? Everything isn't always black and white. As a muslim woman, I'm saying that you should have your own, but you don't have to be arrogant or boisterous about it. The women you're talking about are doing it with a negative attitude or reacting 2 the negativity of some men, and that's wrong.

[mishmish1806]

Its obvious that you have a very superficial understanding of feminism. It sounds like you're assuming feminists hate men and want to live life without them. You can live life the way you want but why do you keep saying we SHOULD do this and SHOULD do that? and why bring up physical differences between men and women? Feminism never has asserted that women are physically and mentally the same as men. You're speaking as if what you're saying is fact and it isn't - it's just your opinion.

[shy4diamond]

May Allah reward the both of u for the reminder u try to send forth..Ameen. as for this topic The hardest thing for me was biting my tongue and having more respect for my husband because I was a young single mother and I was the sole provider for me and my child, it's still a challange but I am learning to play my part do to reading and Praying MashaAllah.

[jamminc07g]

The SUN (TRUE CULTURE) is the true Covering!

[jamminc07g]

How can I see the beauty of Islam if I can't see you...Arab Culture NOT ISLAMIC REALITY! TRUE ISLAM! PEACE>>>>

[shy4diamond]

@jamminc07g That is exactly the beauty of it protecting your self from the evil of others and submitting to your lord by obeying him.

[jamminc07g]

@shy4diamond tell me dear sistas maybe I've miss it were in the quran does it say cloth is the covering.....wisdom is a covering....light is a covering......

[elissica]

Could one of you sisters do a vid on the questions to ask a potential husband? Also on the engagement process and the start of life with someone you barely know.....I would REALLY appreciate it....ASA!!!

[MuslimahofGuidance]

@elissica WAS that would be a good topic, insha' Allah

[suad5]

Asalamu aleikum , masha Allah to this sisters ,so smart masha Allah tabarakalah keep it up sister's, its all about understanding your position of beeing women in the islamic world that's not even an issue alhamdulilah but my sisters in the west are doing great as well alhamdulilah.

[Sabriyah21]

In Islam we get to fully know the person only after we commit in marriage to them--so if you discover he is not who you thought he was hard, you can still support your self. I know a young sister, she had married a man and he was abusive physically and mentally--she had no money because she quit her job when she got married. So she had bad time, she the only muslim in her family so she did not want to involve her kufar family for help. She had to get money to leave, and lived in a shelter 1 year

[Sabriyah21]

As salaamu alaimkum,

Well sis it's not easy to totally submit to the so call good wife role---it really depends on your husbands relationship with his Lord--if his relationship is good then you can depend on him to do his god given job--however most of us especially in America struggle just to do the basics-salaat, arabic, names and attributes of Allah, and fully understanding tauheed-so I say always keep your own money, because money will provide a safety net, cont...

[33Muslimah]

ASA sistas,

I've seen a couple of your other videos and I've noticed that the young lady on the left covers her entire face now. What made you change the way you cover??? And what is that type of covering called??? Nikaab???? I know I probably didn't spell that correctly, my apologies...

[Muslimah2Muslimah]

I@33Muslimah WAS you basically had it right its spelled niqab, you can check out the video I did about wearing niqab on our page : )

Nadira

[Xinadium]

It's fine if that's the way you want to live your lives, but don't insinuate a sister isn't a 'real' Muslim if she chooses to live a different way.

[Muslimah2Muslimah]

@Xinadium Masha' Allah we didn't say anything like that or even hint at that. Simply our perspectives.

[Xinadium]

@Muslimah2Muslimah Of course you did, are you not aware of what you even say? You always tell Muslim women what they 'should' be doing, especially in this video. And it's all over your blog that men and women aren't equal. I respect different opinions, of course, but just ask yourself how fair you're being to women.

[IbnSheba]

----Why have gender based roles in the first place?

[dinavienna]

hmmm.. sisters, I do not believe you can claim the "Muslimah perspective".

I know a lot of Muslimahs who will not agree with you on many of the things you said, including me. "Head of the household" clashes with the partnership in marriage. Quran speaks of a man who is providing for the female being entitled to obedience from her part.

A woman who provides for herself, by her own wealth or by her profession, is not mentioned. If you check Khadijah's marriage to prophet Mohammed, saw, you'll

[dinavienna]

see their marriage was much less hierarchical, much more egalitarian than prophet Mohammed's, saw, later marriages where he provided for very young women of no wealth, widows etc.

Besides science and human society has long proven that while men cannot bear children in the biological sense, they can be excellent caretakers. And psychologically, fathers should provide care, not just money, for their children. Children with a male and female caretaker sharing the task have a leap in social and

[dinavienna]

cognitive development over their peers who were raised by one person only (and a woman being full time caretaker, and a man being full time bread earner and no caretaker essentially means the kid is not raised by the father, the father provides financial means, but not caretaking/raising).

[Muslimah2Muslimah]

@dinavienna Masha' Allah sis we call these videos Muslimah Perspectives because we are Muslimahs and these are our perspectives.

This is just our views on these topics.

Asalaamu alaikum Sis

[zainabadam]

Masha'Allah sisters, great video, its always good to hear your messages, love you two x