One thing that's not reasonable, is saying it has to stay at 80% 20% because that's what it's been, It should be split in the best interest of your child and based on both your situations, whether that's 50/50 80/20 you/him or 20/80 you him!
I'm a child of divorce, which is totally different then what's happening to Lilia, I know that. I see my mother every other weekend and for 2 weeks in the summer and on certain holidays. I've been doing that since I was , I want to say 8 years old? It's a lot easier then the whole 'oh, I can't take her today. Maybe tomorrow." i don't know. I just wanted to throw that out there. You're such a good mom(:
STFU! Okay Jessica is a perfect mom. You need to keep your dirty-ass comments to yourself. Jessica is a faaabb-uu-louus mom and always will be to her daughter and 2 sons. I admire her and look up to her as a role model to never give up, Everything happens for a reason, and God doesnt give you anything you cant handle. She is a great role model for young adults, and her children. So shuv your head up your arse and keep your mouth shut
I know I'm a bit late on this band wagon but I just found your videos and I love that you are making them I have a 2 year old right now and her father has never been a father when he's home he acts like she's his world but if he's not around me he don't care for her...I support this and I don't feel any of it is abuse I believe if he's not there or only there sometimes he don't deserve half of anything until he proves he wants to be a daddy to his little girl...
@yousuckatparenting I am from a broken home and no keeping a child from a parent who doesn't want the child, cant care for the child or is not mature enough is NOT in any form abuse. She is being mature. He doesn't show himself as wanting to be a father. Then he has no right to be one. If he wants 50% he needs to SHOW he wants it. Saying it is not enough.
At least he wants to spend time with his daughter....my daughters father wants nothing to do with her..i have the court order for him to pay child support and he refuses to pay he even moved out of state just to avoid paying so i fell ya on this whole thing
im going to get a custody agreement for my son. simply for protection cuz his father has a lot of drug and alcohol problems so although i dont want to keep my son away from him i will not let him take my son if he is under the influence. im sure he wouldnt keep my son from me on his own but his mom is one of those grandmothers who cannot seem to mind her own business. ever since shes found out about the baby she has been wanting to keep him with her and i know he will do what she tells him to.
hey i got a VIDEO REQUEST! <3 (: can u make an update on the child custody & support for Lilia and a future one for the twins? pleasee! its very informational! i had my babyboy wen i was 17. n been watching ur vids since i think it was ur 3video of lilia (: BIG FAN <3
Every other weekend is not enough time for a little girl to spend with her father. I understand not wanting to increase his time to 50 percent right away but you could make the effort to gradually increase the time he has her until you reach 50/50. A girl needs her Dad. In the best interests of your child, I think you need to look at this from his point of view as well.
how old are you? and why are you like having kids so young without having anything to offer your children and not having a stable family. Get married then have kids... you are so young to be fonicating. what type of example are you showing your daughter? you really just come off as a loose type of girl (for the lack of a better word) have some dignity.
@yazyh Eww shut up! Jess is a fantastic mom, she's 20 now i think. Her home is stable so her daughter and current bump have a stable and very loving family.
@yazyh ummm how about you pull your head out of your arse. im 22 and have 3 beautiful daughters having had my first at 18. Age doesn't matter and to say that she has nothing to offer, well thats a load of shit. Lilia, Kyson and Kaden will grow up knowing what love is and you must be the type of person who only gets pleasure from possesions. Stop putting shit on someone who is clearly more capable of love and sincerity than you >:(
@yazyh fuck you.you dumb bitch i bet you are no better so shut the fuck up and take your 2cents and shove it up your ass you stupid cunt bitch!!!!!!!!!!
@yazyh That is so judgmental and closed minded. Whom do you know that got married first then had children? Besides your parents. In society today, it's happening everywhere. She's not loose if she has sex before marriage. She's young, we've all done it. And if she's loose then over millions of other girls in the U.S are loose too. She takes care of her daughter with her head held high. She takes responsibility for her actions and is strong. She's a great example for her daughter.
@yazyh You haven't walked in her shoes. She has dignity because she still smiles and take care of her responsibilities. You should have some dignity and not judge people.
my uncle and my aunt went through this kinda thing with there kids my uncle has full custody but my aunt gets them every other weekend but if she wants them through the week she can pick them up but like my cuzin she doesnt want anything to do with my aunt any more but yea i thank u should do the every other weekend thing and if he wants her a few days out of the week
hey i know this has been awhile back but what does he get her now?my husband only has joint like your saying do you know what he would have to do to get 50/50?oh and by the way do you have a fb?
@BayouCityImage But that's your opinion isn't it? You have to think about these things before typing them. You don't know her so really...you can't say that by truth
I'm just wondering, does Gabe seeing Lilia only every other weekend count as Shared Custody with him, or does it count as full custody for you and visitation with him?
do all your kids have the same dad i watched you along time ago and started watching you again can t seem to figure this all out please help my brain lol my little one is 10 months :-)
The only advice I have for you is focus on your daughter, and don't rush into another relationship or have anymore children for a while. Not all young guys, but most do not make responsible parents as they are more focused on themselves and having fun. The problem with many young single mothers, they go from one relationship to another and drag their kids into all these relationships. A responsible man wants to pay child support and to see his child.
@TropicalBeauty1 If you don't have a written agreement (if no one has legal custody), then either of the parents could run of with the child and there's nothing the other one could do about it. Legally, it's not kidnapping if you don't have it written which is why it ALWAYS needs to be made legal.
The new girlfriend tag video done on you with Drake was nice. I just don't understand why you are putting your business out there. Who care who is questioning you on youtube. It's your business and the baby can't speak for herself, I don't think she would appreciate it.
haha he is so dumb about "making you get papers to get money" becuase they dont give a shit about how much he makes or whatever they will make him pay sooo much comapred to what you and him wouldagree on.. what a doof
Jess was this issue ever resolved? and another question- what percentage of Gabe's pay do you get? from what I was informed I think child support is like 25% of the parent's pay right?
why are a lot of people on here dumbasses? she clearly states what she wants/dont want and what she think is for the best... why are people twisting her words and saying horrible things? they are clearly jelours of her amazing family and how she is dealing with it and still staying strong... some people really piss me off!
Anyone can have a child and be a father, but it takes a real man to stick around and be there for her to be considered a daddy. seeing your child 4 times a month and giving 150 dollars to support the child doesn't make him a dad. From the sound of it he's an asshole.
HELLO people, just so everyone knows this is a video about HER life. do you agree? yes. this is a video about HER opinions? yes. its okay to have your own opinions, im not saying that, im saying, that you need to stop with the negativity. afterall this is HER channel not yours and if you dont like listening to HER talking about HER life/opinions than y are u watching her videos??? get to steppin geezz... DID YOU NOTICE THE HERS' ??? that means she can do what she wants :p YAY jess lol
ugh sounds like my mom and dad growing up, i was supposed to see him every other weekend but most the time he was "too busy" and it got to the point where i was so uncomfortable going bc he was a complete stranger to me so after i got to be 12 or so i stopped going. just document everything and even if he skips out on support alot of time if you contact authorities and say where hes working theyll autoatically take support off his paycheque
And this is why you should wait until you are physically, emotionally, and financially stable before having sex. People forget because of TV, music, and the media; we are fed, that sex is a RESPONSIBILITY and should be treated as such. I am so glad I don't have to deal with this shit!
@shmoopsy87 I agree somewhat, but you should not be having babies when you are neither physically, emotionally or financially stable. I was having sex at 16. None of the girls in my family EVER got pregnant by chance, it was by choice and in a stable relationship. No excuse to get pregnant today. BIRTH CONTROL
I think that you are doing the right thing. If he hasn't seen her as much as he is suppose to then I believe it is right for lilia, at least until she old enough to understand and be able to decided who she would like to spend her time with. That's something I would do for my son in that situation.
I feel like people dont have the right to judge her choices, Lilia is her child not yours. She is human like everyone else so I see no need for anyone to criticize her like you guys are perfect. Its her life and if you dont like it don't subscribe to her channel, period.
@jonjinaful what the... ? She is 19! where the h ell do you get your info? I mean insulting someone you don't know without correct information is freakin' STUPID!!
Im not trying to be mean but in most states the mom automatically gets full custody and if he were to take her and not bring her back he can be arrested for kidnapping. He has to go to court to have any rights because he doesn't have any.
Sorry about your situation...here's my advise...I'm 27 and going through the same thing, but I have EVERYTHING in writing and signed by a judge. My ex quit his job and is still required to give child support because he needs support his child. Go to court and get everything in a court order.
I'm not sure the custody percentage affects (effects?) the amount of child support/whether it is granted. We have my husband's first son 50% of the time and he has told me the CS is based on whoever earns the higher income or something along those lines. Your state might vary though, I'm not sure.
i saw the video about lilias speech development. in our home , my older two kids call my new husband "da" instead of dad or daddy. hehas been around since they were very little like drake. that way when ur new baby comes it wont be confused or call him drake.
Im 15 and live with my mom but have too see my dad every weekend but... I don't like my dad and dont want too have too go with him every weekend. Does any one know how old a child has to be until he no longer has to go with his dad?
for all I know you have to at least be 16 and you will have to get some counseling on that matter before your mother can appear in court with you to file a complaint, meaning that you wish to no longer see your dad, but maybe you can work things out in mediation
Shared/joint custody means he get to see his daughter equal like u. Most likely u both will have joint custody but ur the primary caregiver. U 2 could write a agreement on paper. Both lawyers look at it n if u 2 agree 2 the terms u can get it notarized. Its considered an legal document.
Hope ur not letting Drake be n the tub with Lilia. Know it seem innocent but Gabe's stans might give that info 2 him n he could use it against u.
@SPYproductions101: Gabe have not financally supported his daughter. Nor have he attempted to visit her. Another man have stepped up to the plate. Drake even said he is not Lillia's father or trying to be her dad because Gabe is her father. If Gabe was handling his business with his child then Jess wouldnt have to go to court and file for child support.
Some of the statements made in the video are hyprocritical. She says she'd never keep Lilia from Gabe but doesnt want him to have shared custody. Why? She deserves one parent just as much as the other.
It seems that shes doing it so he'd have to pay child support and he could be doing it to get out of it. Who knows! But they need to come together for Lila and put money and new live in boyfriends aside.
Far as I can see they're both handling it poorly!!
@jsandlin08 I never ONCE said I didn't want him to have shared custody, I said I DID want him to. What I didn't want, was for him to have 50/50 physical custody. That's because he has NEVER had it before and changing it now is only going to screw up Lilia. He has to pay child support either way, that's not the problem. The problem is, HE never takes care of her when she's over there, his mom does, and the only reason he wants her is so he DOESN'T have to (cont...)
@jsandlin08 (cont...) pay. The best thing for Lilia is to have one consistent, stable home. And her swicthing houses every week is very confusing for a child that small and by far the worst thing for her.
@GabeandJesss i grew up seeing my dad every other weekend and it worked perfect :) i have a great relationship with both my parents and deffinatly didnt wanna be stuck at dads place 50% of the time as i had a life of my own (school, friends ect) i loved going there every other weekend. i think its a good idea jess ur doing an amazing job of raising lilia <3 keep up the good work :)
I know your not trying to talk down on him. But he seems like a real ahole! Not helping you and how he hardly saw her then wanted 50% custody... I feel like your the only mature parent stay strong love <3
He refuses to pay child support? I am not sure about the laws in your state but many states will require him to pay back child support/garnish his wages after amt is settled Have you spoken to an attorney? Many agencies will refer you to a family law firm that will do consultations or google pro bono lawyers for your state. I know that it is very important to get legal council when it involves cust/sup issues.. Unfortunately having Drake in the pic and his not working is a - in the courts eye.
Jess...I admire you for what you are doing and sharing. I become a single mom at 17 and did not have support from "the father" which made life very challenging. I am sorry to hear about Gabe and hope things work out regarding his visitation and support. You have so much maturity and grace in how you are handling this - good for you! :) As far as the nay-sayers? Do not feel you have to explain yourself - own it and keep on going! :) ♥
you are doing a great job with lilia gabe is being a jerk he should not say no when you ask for money for lilia i hope that he know when you guys go to court he will have to pay
Jess, you are doing the RITE thing ok. If that was me & till this point my babys daddy didnt give my son money then he wouldnt deserve him. & IF he would really say he didnt wanna take her when u would ask & now all of a sudden then its bcuz he doesnt wanna let u have 80% of the custody. But get a family lawyer & dont let him win. You are a good parent & so is drake. Screw the haters!!
(cont) however Gabe is the biological father of Lilia just as much as you are, if he is saying he wants to step up and wants joint custody like this... maybe you should all try it and just see how it works out?
okay... well i don't mean to attack anything you've said in this video... or criticize you cuz I know it must be hard for you with all this going on.
But... you did say that you want him to spend more time with Lilia.. maybe 50% wouldn't be such a bad thing. Yeah, he wouldn't be paying child support, but he would be in her life more often. thats what matters, right? I do see the problem of having no stable living environment if that happens, so i know what you mean. however.. (cont)
you say that you dont want to keep Lilia from her dad, yet you dont want to grant him half custody? sure he doesnt want to pay child support but he will be spending that time with her that you were complaining about earlier in the video. you are being pretty hypocritical and making it sound like you rather keep her from him just to get the money. Im pretty sure that he wouldnt want all his private business put on blast like this too. Youre making him sound like a bad father for wanting custody.
Hey Jess! I use to watch your videos throughout your entire pregnancy until the labor and delivery video, and then stopped because I had my own daughter to deliver. =) She was born July 13, 2010 and it's been a whole busy year now and I'm just getting back to your videos. A lot has happened it seems and I'm sorry to hear that your relationship is at where it is right now. But I look forward to catching up on all of your videos!!! :)
jess i just have to say i have followed your videos for a while and i commend you for what your doing she is your daughter and gabes but your her mother your a amAZING mom dont forget that :)
@SPYproductions101 AND she is NOT a horrible mom.. is anyone perfect no people make mistakes like the ones you are making right now by posting shit like this on her video grow some balls and say it to her face if you know her so well.. i think she is a great mom she is getting no help from the father and she is doing it ALL by her self.. and now she finally has help so give her a break if Gabe really wanted liliah he would have taken legal action by now that just shows how uncommited he reallyis
@sterlingstar93x How do u know that she is not getting help from Gabe??.. Just bcoz she said in her video ( She has given her PO BOX. May be she wants people like you to support her financialy) According to you if he has not taken legal action.. means he does not love Lilia ? Thats your own stupid assumption.
@zzzindagirocks Because she said she doesn' t get child support and he has only seen her a hand full of times in how ever many months that isn't much heIp.. I never said he didn't love her he wants 50% custody because he doesn't want to pay child support and what i was saying was if he really wanted her 50% of the time he would have done it months ago not now. Sorry i should have breaken it down in simpler terms for your dumbass :D
@cheyanne2010 actually i know them both! and i know that jess is putting lilia in a bad enviornment already. Actually he does get her SOMETIMES on the weekends but you know if he even asked her to see the baby anytime in between she would deny and say she is busy. She has all of these pictures of her and drake and the name of her channel is GABEANDJESSS. I mean a lot of people do watch for jess and lilia but where are pictures of her and her father? I mean yeah drake is cuter then gabe but why
you jess for not letting gabe see his daughter on a regular basis because it's not healthy and then having drake living with you going to get your own house that your grandma is helping you with is not healthy. you aren't even giving gabe a chance to be a dad. you're a horrible mom.
she never even gives gabe a chance to be a father to his daughter because all she has time for is drake. Drake tries to be lilias dad when she isn't even related to him. What sick person would put their own daughter in a bathtub NAKED with her boyfriend? I think that gabe SHOULD get 50% of lilia because all jess and drake are doing is setting a bad example for her daughter. taking a bath with someone who isn't daddy is NOT okay. There should be some legal action taken here. And as far as
@SPYproductions101 If you know Jess and Gabe why are you bring this drama on the computer and hideing behind your computer? YOU ARE A LOSER who has no life so you have to get in the middle of peoples lives on the computer..
@SPYproductions101 I have to agree with you on this. Another man should NEVER get into the bath tub with a little girl, even if he has shorts on! I feel that Jess is making some bad choices here based on her new beau. This is one reason why people shouldn't have kids outside of marriage. Its so hard for the child, and unfair. Why would Drake get Lilia's name tatted on him? Thats just strange.... I know shes young and when she looks back on this, shes gonna say "WTH was I thinking?"
When my twin and I were growing up we also got to be with our dad every other weekend, I think its best also ecspecially when the mother is the one who took care of the child alone in the first place!!!
I guess the novelty of having a baby wore off. Custody aside, he should WANT to support his child. I've only seen Gabe in videos, but he seems to love Lilia very much. I can't understand why he wouldn't want to see her, much less support her. Even if it's setting up a trust fund for college, that would be better than nothing. It kills my soul to see that sweet little face and know she's in the middle of something no child should be in the middle of.
i really hope u guys get things sorted out because i know how hard it is , my mom is going thru the same thing as u . right now im still with my bf but we could break up at anytime and i dont wana have to go thru this
I wasnt trying to be rude im just saying I hope you dont feel obligated to put every single aspect of your life on youtube.. I dont think that was inappropriate im just saying thats was the only topic you have said you wont talk about..
In most cases that I know of the main care taker has custody with the other parent having visitation rights. Its great that you are documenting everything keep doing that. hope I helped some. you are a great mom and lilia is beautiful i watched your videos all through my pregancy lilia was bor like a month or two before my son. its nice to get to watch the stages lilia is going through and how you are dealing with certain things. I have so much respect for you and really love your videos. =]
you are an amazing mother and I completely understand where you are coming from about Gabe having 50% custody. If you have Lilia 95% of the time and all of a sudden he wants 50% that would not be god for her to swtch over like that. My entire life my parents badled over custody of me and I can say at least in my state for a father to ger 50% custody of the child without the mothers consent that is very hard to obtain unless he shows that the moher is unfiit wich you def arent!
You are very strong, Jessica. My son's father does not know how to be a father. I know you expressed that you like two parents to be involved but he would hurt my son so he's not. I thought long and hard about whether to get support from him and I decided no because I didn't want him to have any legal way to take him away from me. I think you're doing amazingly with Lilia and you're being very smart. It's hard to put your personal feelings back in order to do the right thing.
Jessica has shared her life with people that she doesn't even know. I give her HUGE props for being confident in her lifestyle to share with the people who love to watch her. I find her inspiring, and if you don't like what she says or her videos. DONT WATCH THEM. Plan and simple. Keep your negative comments to yourself.
Oh man, I'm sorry you're going through this right now :( I hope you and Gabe won't fall out if you haven't already. By the way, I really like your hair in this video, it suits you :)
i hope this problem has a solution for it soon. i so agree with you trying to do wats best for your baby girl!! as for Gabe hes the one missing out on some moments of his daughter's life he wont be able to see again. she would only be this age for so long. stay positive!! and i hope the best for u and ur family!
So he gets her every other weekend, but in between he asks to see her when it is convenient for him? SMH, men... Anway, if he agreed to the every other weekend thing - he should pay some sort of child support. IMHO
@zzzindagirocks seriously? if you dont watch jessicas videos for anything other than to judge, then dont bother commenting. its rude & with all the other shi* she goes thru, why add any other bother for no effing reason? no one said you had to beileve her.. & this has absolutley nothing to do with you! so leave it alone bc her true subbies, care about her! & she helps many maanny people!
so many of these people have no idea what they are talking about. as mothers we deserve and earn the right to have our child more then the father. if gabe wasnt around and still continues not to pay he cant not randomly demand 50/50. that boogious! your a great mommy and i support you :)
@zzzindagirocks You don't have to believe anything I say if you don't want to. But how would it help me at all what-so-ever to lie about something like this on youtube to random people I don't know? I don't make videos like this just to deceive people, I make them so that people in similar situations can relate to someone. Yes, Drake spends wayyy more time with Lilia than Gabe does. It doesn't bother me if you don't believe me, that's your choice. But I know that what I'm saying is the truth.
@GabeandJesss I do not know who are u making these videos for. If u want to share ur life with the people then give people right to question you. If you do not bother what people say about you then people should also think that what they are viewing, reading or listening coming through reliable source and based on truth.
my advice would be to definitely take this down... you should seek legal aid - it's free in florida depending on your income, which shouldn't be an issue since you don't really work. i would also suggest to not even discuss custody/child support even after everything is settled in court... DEFINITELY document everything imaginable [very glad to hear that you already were], just not on the internet. it's truly nobody's business and could really cause issues for you.
oh goodness Jess I know exactly where you are coming from. I have not yet gotten ANY support from my daughters father.. I filed before January of this year and STILL they are beating me around the bush.. he rescheduled it til the end of august.. its just RIDICULOUS!!
I think you are a smart cookie because for him to ask for 50% custody is to dodge child support... however, consider taking this video down. Youre going to have to fight him in court and a vid like this could be twisted against you.
You REALLY need to take this down. Whether you feel that you didn't say anything that could bite you in the ass, you made this video before any legal issues were resolved. I am a grown mother of 2. You need to remove this. Your custody issues are no one's business.
Drake is cool but you do not now if hes gonna be around forever and to give him that much advantage over Gabe is wrong because technically drakes lives with you and your makin him apart of Lilias life more that her father. Come on jess do a lil more thinking girl!
Honestly girl i feel baby for Lilia it sucks that its going down like this. However that every other weekend stuff is not fair weather he did that for child support or not its still his daughter! As mothers you do what you have to do not what you want 7 i think u are doing and AWESOME job with Lilia. & if he doesnt wanna pay child support take his ass to court and give him the business but that 80/20 thing is wrong & the fact that you have your boyfriend around more than him is a bit much.
Just because custody is 50/50, doesn't mean he isn't obligated to pay child support. It would be less of course. Our friends live in Michigan and he still pays. You might want to look into that.
I've Never asked for childsuport to the father of my 2 daughters My Actual Husband wont let me.he says is better that way .he dont have the right to ask to see them or taken them with him ...He knows where we live my phone # if he dont call is cuz his not interest on being a father so why Bother Askin for help to some1 who the word father is clearly to Big for him.So dont expect nothin from Hin Jess just keep doing what u doin and when she grows up she is gona know who was there 4 her ..
It's not wrong to keep a child or children from their parents when the parent(s) are abusive or if there is a situation where it's not healthy for the child. My parents have been been divorced for 14 years and I'm 21 with a child whose father is not in our lives at all and that really is the best thing. My father should not be in my life or my brothers and I feel that my son's father needs to stay out of our lives. So under the correct circumstances, it's better for parent(s) to not be there.
I knew it!! Just like the father of my son! But at least he tries to act interested. The state chased his dad down, I wanted him to stay away. His drug use and inconsistency was more unhealthy for my child than it was him not seeing his biological father. When his dad got 30 consecutive days with him (he is now 8). I started the adoption process and now I nor he is the parent of my son. My parents adopted my son. Now he has 0% rights to my son and I'm happy with it.
when I was a baby and until I was like 7 years old, my dad came over to my moms house every other weekend. Mostly when my mom had work-weekends.
When I was old enough to take the bus by myself I visited him about 1 day every week. I rearly slept at his house because he moved alot and I didnt have my own room. And of course some extra days and weekends if there was something special.
That worked out great for us and when I got older I was able to decide for myself :)
Im 15 and my parents have been divorced scinse i was 7. I was 50/50 at each parent.. I got bad grades for all the stress and felt like i was moving every week. Now I live 80/20 .. and i love it so much more.. My parents know i love them just as much even tho I chose not to be 50/50.. And im lucky I know that.. Am a happy girl now.. Hope everything works out and you get your way.. You are so inspiring.. XOXO
I really hope all of this ends well. You'll probably end up having a compromise so maybe if his every second weekend goes for an extra day or two, or if he sees her every weekend of something like that. I'm really glad you're trying to make sure Lilia still sees her dad, so many people try to take sole custody and it is important Gabe is in Lilia's life.
Wow, I am a new mom too, my daughter is about two months younger than Lilia, my husband and I almost divorced a few months back and I didn't know what the hell I was going to do, you are an inspiring woman.
I think kyleandcarissa is right.. I dont think u should have posted this til after the written agreement because if gabe sees this all its gonna do is piss him off... Just because people ask you tons of questions about your personal life you shouldnt feel obligated to post everything... So far you and drakes sex routein is the first thing ive seen you not speak about..
@cami805 If I didn't want to post it then I wouldn't. You have no idea how many messages I get daily about how much I've helped people that are in the same situation as I am. There's not that much information out there about how to handle certain situations and I'm very happy that I can influence people's life in a positive way and I enjoy making videos about how I'm dealing (cont..)
@cami805 (cont..) with life. It shows people how extremely difficult it is. But really? Mine and Drake's sex routine? That's extremely inappropriate to say.. JS
@cami805 should anyone talk about their sex routine tbh myself and my partner do NOT say oh sex sex between 3 and 4 monday the lunch then 6 and 7 wednesday as an EXAMPLE as he is in the army, who does that? xx
@cami805 Is intimacy supposed to be a routine? I don't know about you, but I wouldn't want my bf and I to be on a schedule when it comes to being intimate with one another.
hey jess, even though he doesnt pay child support, you clearly know how to manage your money well because lilia doesnt seem deprived of anything! you give her everything she needs even tho he doesnt pay support
youve done really well! kudos! but i know it would be a lot! easier if and when he pays support
My friend has done the every other weekend with her son since he was a year old and he is now 10
Basically, his dad gets him every other weekend, and one night a week. Plus two consecutive weeks in the summer once he turned 5. She also gets child support.
Fight for what is best for you and your daughter. Good Luck!
Jess i could be wrong but this video was maybe a bad idea? What if Gabe doesnt realise he doesnt have to give her back to you, then sees this video. I don't think you should have posted this until after you had a writen agreement...
I think it's ridiculous that all of a sudden somoene that saw their little girl 34 hours out of the week wants to have her 50% of the time!? But won't pay child support? Doesn't he realize he'll have to pay probably way more for her if she was living with him half the time. Just like you are footing ALL of the bill for Lilia now. That's just plain crazy! Definitely do all you can to see that Lilia gets back child support and the child support she needs and deserves! Good luck to you Jess! :)
You are your daughters best advocate, so you do what you have to do. I grew up in the same situation and it will get easier as Lilia grows and can make decisions for herself about where she wants to be. Until then, you know her better than anyone and you seem mature enough to make decisions for her based on that and not on anger or revenge. Lilia is lucky to have a mom who is strong enough to stand up for her even if it's the more difficult road for you.
Advice from experience: Its true about the whole keeping Gabe from Lilia would be wrong. But dont ever under estimate. No matter how unlikely it seems that he would keep Lilia. Court battles take very long and if he wanted to, he could keep her until it all got sorted out. Not only that, but he could find reasons where theres none to use against you in court. Perhaps he could come to your house to see her? Just a thought. Im a family law student so i thought id shed light on this.
You should tell the court house the months he did not pay for child support. I don't think its fair for you to be supporting your child on your own you both are young and maybe don't have an stable job BUT come on he is a man he needs to support his offspring no matter what age!!! I hope everything works best for both of you (lilia and you). and let him pay his part of being a parent!! XOXOX from NY :)
I think if he gets the joint custody or 50% custody from the court he can't turn around and say well Jessica sorry I can't take her he has to obey it so if he wants it he has no choice but to follow through. As a child of sole custody only seeing my dad on the weekends or whenever he wanted to isn't healthy but my dad also was abuses drugs and drinking. So I hope everything works out for you and you guys can finally agree.
I think it really depends on who lilia is more comfortable with to base how much time she spends with him. I agree 50% is WAY wrong. But I see my dad every other weekend and I wish I could see him more. I think what you Guys settled on is good! It's really mature of you both. As for child support, he shouldn't have to have a written agreement. Either way he has to pay it, he's just causing mire stress and time loss for you.
50% physical custody?!!??!?!?!?!?!?!?!!??!?! JESSICA, YOU ARE THE MOTHER YOU ARE THE ONLYYYYY ONE WHO KNOWS WHATS BESTTT FOR YOUR DAUGHTER!!!!!!! STAND UP FOR WHAT YOU BELIEVE IN... I DON'T SEE WHY HE WOULDN'T WANT TO PAY ANY MONEY FOR HIS CHILD!!! BEST OF LUCK TO YOU AND LILIA :D
I left a verbal/emotional abusive relationship in early June, got a laywer, and set up child support and custody in late June this year. He wants to work things out, but I believe he just wants to get out of the child support. He has two other children who haven't seen any money for a year. I really doubt I will see child support for our 3 month old, but as long as I have custody of her, I'm sure she will be safe. We will see what the future hold for us. Good luck in your child support/custody.
My advice is simply don't trust men u should get the written agreement soon so he can't take full custody of her and if he does I will fly down there and murder him
Its so sad that women have to get court orders in order to get men to pay for a child they helped bring in to the world. But that's the way it has to be. Stay strong and keep up with the court system because that is they only way you will ever see a dime from him for Lilia. You are a wonderful mother.
From personal experience from mum you are doing the right thing I think you should def take care of Lilia majority of The time because you do a brilliant job and consistent. Fathers input is also vital BUT surely should get some financial assistance. Wish you luck take care and stay blessed
Just wondering Jessica when Lilia goes over Gabe's house do you provide the diapers her clothes etc.? Or does he buy diapers or anything like that when she's over there? Cause if it isn't that's really messed up.
@NicolleBerry No he buys stuff for over there. I used to provide them but I told him if he's not gunna pay then he has to buy stuff for over there at least. I bought her bed, swing, and some clothes that he has over there though. Ugh.
@GabeandJesss wow Jessica I feel really bad for you >:| I hope things work out for you guys. Most importantly for Lilia's sake. I really feel for you when you said you're scared that he might keep Lilia from you God forbid that ever happens! Stay strong! God bless. Love Nicolle:)
I don't know how it works in the States but up here in Canada if the father refuses to pay Child Support the "state" can go in and garnish his wages.. Meaning every month x amount of money comes of his pay check whether he like it or not. I am not sure how you go about getting this out in place but I hop
One thing that's not reasonable, is saying it has to stay at 80% 20% because that's what it's been, It should be split in the best interest of your child and based on both your situations, whether that's 50/50 80/20 you/him or 20/80 you him!
jarax44 13 hours ago
I'm a child of divorce, which is totally different then what's happening to Lilia, I know that. I see my mother every other weekend and for 2 weeks in the summer and on certain holidays. I've been doing that since I was , I want to say 8 years old? It's a lot easier then the whole 'oh, I can't take her today. Maybe tomorrow." i don't know. I just wanted to throw that out there. You're such a good mom(:
CountryGurl1634 2 days ago
Can you do an update on your custody situation now?
mlynn881 4 days ago 4
@yazyh
STFU! Okay Jessica is a perfect mom. You need to keep your dirty-ass comments to yourself. Jessica is a faaabb-uu-louus mom and always will be to her daughter and 2 sons. I admire her and look up to her as a role model to never give up, Everything happens for a reason, and God doesnt give you anything you cant handle. She is a great role model for young adults, and her children. So shuv your head up your arse and keep your mouth shut
Thanks :)))
lilprincess5858 5 days ago
Just curious, you said you don't have time for a job besides youtube..do you get paid ?? If so, thats awesome....
raerae15xo 1 week ago
I know I'm a bit late on this band wagon but I just found your videos and I love that you are making them I have a 2 year old right now and her father has never been a father when he's home he acts like she's his world but if he's not around me he don't care for her...I support this and I don't feel any of it is abuse I believe if he's not there or only there sometimes he don't deserve half of anything until he proves he wants to be a daddy to his little girl...
azmiar454 1 week ago
@yousuckatparenting I am from a broken home and no keeping a child from a parent who doesn't want the child, cant care for the child or is not mature enough is NOT in any form abuse. She is being mature. He doesn't show himself as wanting to be a father. Then he has no right to be one. If he wants 50% he needs to SHOW he wants it. Saying it is not enough.
hiImDay 1 week ago
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Do you guys have to do a DNA test to do the custody agreement?
sweetness8t5 2 weeks ago
At least he wants to spend time with his daughter....my daughters father wants nothing to do with her..i have the court order for him to pay child support and he refuses to pay he even moved out of state just to avoid paying so i fell ya on this whole thing
pubear1128 2 weeks ago
im going to get a custody agreement for my son. simply for protection cuz his father has a lot of drug and alcohol problems so although i dont want to keep my son away from him i will not let him take my son if he is under the influence. im sure he wouldnt keep my son from me on his own but his mom is one of those grandmothers who cannot seem to mind her own business. ever since shes found out about the baby she has been wanting to keep him with her and i know he will do what she tells him to.
trinabae10 2 weeks ago
hey i got a VIDEO REQUEST! <3 (: can u make an update on the child custody & support for Lilia and a future one for the twins? pleasee! its very informational! i had my babyboy wen i was 17. n been watching ur vids since i think it was ur 3video of lilia (: BIG FAN <3
JeremeandErica 2 weeks ago
Every other weekend is not enough time for a little girl to spend with her father. I understand not wanting to increase his time to 50 percent right away but you could make the effort to gradually increase the time he has her until you reach 50/50. A girl needs her Dad. In the best interests of your child, I think you need to look at this from his point of view as well.
Peskey2010 2 weeks ago
Wow, yeah, for him to want 50% custody is crazy. If he saw her about 30-40 hours a month that means he saw her 5% of the time.
frozentootsiepop 3 weeks ago
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frozentootsiepop 3 weeks ago
how old are you? and why are you like having kids so young without having anything to offer your children and not having a stable family. Get married then have kids... you are so young to be fonicating. what type of example are you showing your daughter? you really just come off as a loose type of girl (for the lack of a better word) have some dignity.
yazyh 3 weeks ago
@yazyh Eww shut up! Jess is a fantastic mom, she's 20 now i think. Her home is stable so her daughter and current bump have a stable and very loving family.
heyyababe123 3 weeks ago
@yazyh ummm how about you pull your head out of your arse. im 22 and have 3 beautiful daughters having had my first at 18. Age doesn't matter and to say that she has nothing to offer, well thats a load of shit. Lilia, Kyson and Kaden will grow up knowing what love is and you must be the type of person who only gets pleasure from possesions. Stop putting shit on someone who is clearly more capable of love and sincerity than you >:(
TheMisscongeneality 3 weeks ago
@yazyh fuck you.you dumb bitch i bet you are no better so shut the fuck up and take your 2cents and shove it up your ass you stupid cunt bitch!!!!!!!!!!
mercedes3596 2 weeks ago
@yazyh That is so judgmental and closed minded. Whom do you know that got married first then had children? Besides your parents. In society today, it's happening everywhere. She's not loose if she has sex before marriage. She's young, we've all done it. And if she's loose then over millions of other girls in the U.S are loose too. She takes care of her daughter with her head held high. She takes responsibility for her actions and is strong. She's a great example for her daughter.
LUX3dollfaceLAHbella 1 week ago
@yazyh You haven't walked in her shoes. She has dignity because she still smiles and take care of her responsibilities. You should have some dignity and not judge people.
LUX3dollfaceLAHbella 1 week ago
my uncle and my aunt went through this kinda thing with there kids my uncle has full custody but my aunt gets them every other weekend but if she wants them through the week she can pick them up but like my cuzin she doesnt want anything to do with my aunt any more but yea i thank u should do the every other weekend thing and if he wants her a few days out of the week
Nikkirieman18 4 weeks ago
hey i know this has been awhile back but what does he get her now?my husband only has joint like your saying do you know what he would have to do to get 50/50?oh and by the way do you have a fb?
TFlayWhite 1 month ago
so you think its completly rong to keep a child from one of their parents how is that going to work with drake then, i guess he will be seeing them.
95bravegirl95 1 month ago
@BayouCityImage But that's your opinion isn't it? You have to think about these things before typing them. You don't know her so really...you can't say that by truth
TwinkleRebornNursery 1 month ago
Could you do an update on this? unless it is the same. Lilia is adorable.
TaylorSwiftfan1iever 1 month ago 3
What wrong with 50%?
BayouCityImage 1 month ago
@BayouCityImage She said earlier. He saw her 35 hours out of 700 hours and then all the sudden he wants 50% custody
RosesAndMakeup13 12 hours ago
I'm just wondering, does Gabe seeing Lilia only every other weekend count as Shared Custody with him, or does it count as full custody for you and visitation with him?
AwakeningSunshine 1 month ago
do all your kids have the same dad i watched you along time ago and started watching you again can t seem to figure this all out please help my brain lol my little one is 10 months :-)
lifewithIndy 1 month ago
@lifewithIndy Lilia is Gabe's daughter, the twins are Drake's sons.
AbbeyCaceey 1 month ago
The only advice I have for you is focus on your daughter, and don't rush into another relationship or have anymore children for a while. Not all young guys, but most do not make responsible parents as they are more focused on themselves and having fun. The problem with many young single mothers, they go from one relationship to another and drag their kids into all these relationships. A responsible man wants to pay child support and to see his child.
You need to put your daughter first!
51Saffron 1 month ago
you are a very nice person i have to fight every week to see my daughter and i pay child support and i only get to see her for 4 hours if i am luckey
clemmer45 1 month ago
Oh BTW no one can just keep the child like that, it would be considered kidnapping.
TropicalBeauty1 2 months ago
@TropicalBeauty1 If you don't have a written agreement (if no one has legal custody), then either of the parents could run of with the child and there's nothing the other one could do about it. Legally, it's not kidnapping if you don't have it written which is why it ALWAYS needs to be made legal.
HelloAlyKhaye 1 month ago
The new girlfriend tag video done on you with Drake was nice. I just don't understand why you are putting your business out there. Who care who is questioning you on youtube. It's your business and the baby can't speak for herself, I don't think she would appreciate it.
TropicalBeauty1 2 months ago
haha he is so dumb about "making you get papers to get money" becuase they dont give a shit about how much he makes or whatever they will make him pay sooo much comapred to what you and him wouldagree on.. what a doof
TheTurnersJourney 2 months ago
you two were so cute together :(
bulldogchic 2 months ago
@mrsacie shutup u are a hater! grow up and stop being rude
TheTaylorrocks14 2 months ago
Jess was this issue ever resolved? and another question- what percentage of Gabe's pay do you get? from what I was informed I think child support is like 25% of the parent's pay right?
JulysTanzanite 2 months ago
Gabe and Drake need to grow up. It's just sad how pathetic these losers are.
MrsAcRice 2 months ago 9
why are a lot of people on here dumbasses? she clearly states what she wants/dont want and what she think is for the best... why are people twisting her words and saying horrible things? they are clearly jelours of her amazing family and how she is dealing with it and still staying strong... some people really piss me off!
katwarable 3 months ago in playlist More videos from GabeandJesss 7
He does realize that if he just gives you a little $ here and there it would be A LOT cheaper then what the courts will do.. right? Lol
kristinaaa29 3 months ago 5
Hope your okay
LadyCocoa1234 3 months ago
Anyone can have a child and be a father, but it takes a real man to stick around and be there for her to be considered a daddy. seeing your child 4 times a month and giving 150 dollars to support the child doesn't make him a dad. From the sound of it he's an asshole.
forgetregret100 4 months ago 9
HELLO people, just so everyone knows this is a video about HER life. do you agree? yes. this is a video about HER opinions? yes. its okay to have your own opinions, im not saying that, im saying, that you need to stop with the negativity. afterall this is HER channel not yours and if you dont like listening to HER talking about HER life/opinions than y are u watching her videos??? get to steppin geezz... DID YOU NOTICE THE HERS' ??? that means she can do what she wants :p YAY jess lol
bricrisel 4 months ago 4
ugh sounds like my mom and dad growing up, i was supposed to see him every other weekend but most the time he was "too busy" and it got to the point where i was so uncomfortable going bc he was a complete stranger to me so after i got to be 12 or so i stopped going. just document everything and even if he skips out on support alot of time if you contact authorities and say where hes working theyll autoatically take support off his paycheque
springit89 4 months ago
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gymnasticslover96 4 months ago
And this is why you should wait until you are physically, emotionally, and financially stable before having sex. People forget because of TV, music, and the media; we are fed, that sex is a RESPONSIBILITY and should be treated as such. I am so glad I don't have to deal with this shit!
shmoopsy87 5 months ago 4
@shmoopsy87 I agree somewhat, but you should not be having babies when you are neither physically, emotionally or financially stable. I was having sex at 16. None of the girls in my family EVER got pregnant by chance, it was by choice and in a stable relationship. No excuse to get pregnant today. BIRTH CONTROL
51Saffron 1 month ago
@51Saffron She was on birth control. It's not 100 % safe on its own - remember?
Babyfootish 1 month ago
I hate to see broken families.....so sad....
18ormorexox 5 months ago
I think that you are doing the right thing. If he hasn't seen her as much as he is suppose to then I believe it is right for lilia, at least until she old enough to understand and be able to decided who she would like to spend her time with. That's something I would do for my son in that situation.
latinbeauty100 5 months ago
I feel like people dont have the right to judge her choices, Lilia is her child not yours. She is human like everyone else so I see no need for anyone to criticize her like you guys are perfect. Its her life and if you dont like it don't subscribe to her channel, period.
2013kristina 5 months ago 3
i believe in you - i love your videos and i think you have done the best thing
jaimiegoofball 5 months ago
@jonjinaful what the... ? She is 19! where the h ell do you get your info? I mean insulting someone you don't know without correct information is freakin' STUPID!!
juju0smiley 6 months ago
@zzzindagirocks why would you NEED to?? If you don't believe her then that's your deal. Jess shouldn't have to sit here and defend herself to you.
DMKmomma15 6 months ago
@jonjinaful Age doesnt determine how responisble of a parent u are.
Adenzmomma90 6 months ago
@jonjinaful What?! When in any video did she say she was 14? She's 19!
BlackSabbathFan1985 6 months ago 2
Im not trying to be mean but in most states the mom automatically gets full custody and if he were to take her and not bring her back he can be arrested for kidnapping. He has to go to court to have any rights because he doesn't have any.
jmelynn21211 6 months ago
Sorry about your situation...here's my advise...I'm 27 and going through the same thing, but I have EVERYTHING in writing and signed by a judge. My ex quit his job and is still required to give child support because he needs support his child. Go to court and get everything in a court order.
bsblover21 6 months ago
Are you pregnant? Is the baby his? Sorry if im being noisy.
KayRenee1998 6 months ago
Is he finally paying childsupport??? Why did you guys break up so soon after delivery?
Many greetings from Germany
Sternlein4USA 6 months ago
I'm not sure the custody percentage affects (effects?) the amount of child support/whether it is granted. We have my husband's first son 50% of the time and he has told me the CS is based on whoever earns the higher income or something along those lines. Your state might vary though, I'm not sure.
NerdyCanadian 6 months ago
and that will work in court too, if gabe objects. its not fair to confuse the new child, so come up with a special term for father.
ozzyperone 6 months ago
i saw the video about lilias speech development. in our home , my older two kids call my new husband "da" instead of dad or daddy. hehas been around since they were very little like drake. that way when ur new baby comes it wont be confused or call him drake.
ozzyperone 6 months ago
Im 15 and live with my mom but have too see my dad every weekend but... I don't like my dad and dont want too have too go with him every weekend. Does any one know how old a child has to be until he no longer has to go with his dad?
Daprodigy988 6 months ago
@Daprodigy988
for all I know you have to at least be 16 and you will have to get some counseling on that matter before your mother can appear in court with you to file a complaint, meaning that you wish to no longer see your dad, but maybe you can work things out in mediation
Sternlein4USA 6 months ago
my parents broke up when i was an infant and i still hate it im having alot of custody issues and problems with my mom :( so i wish lilia luck!
ds93103 6 months ago
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Btw im not saying Drake is creepy or anything like that. Its just a little inappropiate. Wish you, Lilia and Drake all the best. :)
cokoqt81 6 months ago
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Shared/joint custody means he get to see his daughter equal like u. Most likely u both will have joint custody but ur the primary caregiver. U 2 could write a agreement on paper. Both lawyers look at it n if u 2 agree 2 the terms u can get it notarized. Its considered an legal document.
Hope ur not letting Drake be n the tub with Lilia. Know it seem innocent but Gabe's stans might give that info 2 him n he could use it against u.
cokoqt81 6 months ago
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@SPYproductions101: Gabe have not financally supported his daughter. Nor have he attempted to visit her. Another man have stepped up to the plate. Drake even said he is not Lillia's father or trying to be her dad because Gabe is her father. If Gabe was handling his business with his child then Jess wouldnt have to go to court and file for child support.
cokoqt81 6 months ago
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Some of the statements made in the video are hyprocritical. She says she'd never keep Lilia from Gabe but doesnt want him to have shared custody. Why? She deserves one parent just as much as the other.
It seems that shes doing it so he'd have to pay child support and he could be doing it to get out of it. Who knows! But they need to come together for Lila and put money and new live in boyfriends aside.
Far as I can see they're both handling it poorly!!
jsandlin08 6 months ago
@jsandlin08 I never ONCE said I didn't want him to have shared custody, I said I DID want him to. What I didn't want, was for him to have 50/50 physical custody. That's because he has NEVER had it before and changing it now is only going to screw up Lilia. He has to pay child support either way, that's not the problem. The problem is, HE never takes care of her when she's over there, his mom does, and the only reason he wants her is so he DOESN'T have to (cont...)
GabeandJesss 6 months ago 59
@jsandlin08 (cont...) pay. The best thing for Lilia is to have one consistent, stable home. And her swicthing houses every week is very confusing for a child that small and by far the worst thing for her.
GabeandJesss 6 months ago 51
@GabeandJesss i grew up seeing my dad every other weekend and it worked perfect :) i have a great relationship with both my parents and deffinatly didnt wanna be stuck at dads place 50% of the time as i had a life of my own (school, friends ect) i loved going there every other weekend. i think its a good idea jess ur doing an amazing job of raising lilia <3 keep up the good work :)
taytayjane1 2 months ago
I know your not trying to talk down on him. But he seems like a real ahole! Not helping you and how he hardly saw her then wanted 50% custody... I feel like your the only mature parent stay strong love <3
EmLovescrazy 6 months ago
You are really smart. I love how you say you dont think its right to keep a child from one of their parents. I agree 100%!!!
EmLovescrazy 6 months ago
He refuses to pay child support? I am not sure about the laws in your state but many states will require him to pay back child support/garnish his wages after amt is settled Have you spoken to an attorney? Many agencies will refer you to a family law firm that will do consultations or google pro bono lawyers for your state. I know that it is very important to get legal council when it involves cust/sup issues.. Unfortunately having Drake in the pic and his not working is a - in the courts eye.
hippygram 6 months ago
Jess...I admire you for what you are doing and sharing. I become a single mom at 17 and did not have support from "the father" which made life very challenging. I am sorry to hear about Gabe and hope things work out regarding his visitation and support. You have so much maturity and grace in how you are handling this - good for you! :) As far as the nay-sayers? Do not feel you have to explain yourself - own it and keep on going! :) ♥
CatherineStaat 6 months ago
you are doing a great job with lilia gabe is being a jerk he should not say no when you ask for money for lilia i hope that he know when you guys go to court he will have to pay
925dorothy 7 months ago
Jess, you are doing the RITE thing ok. If that was me & till this point my babys daddy didnt give my son money then he wouldnt deserve him. & IF he would really say he didnt wanna take her when u would ask & now all of a sudden then its bcuz he doesnt wanna let u have 80% of the custody. But get a family lawyer & dont let him win. You are a good parent & so is drake. Screw the haters!!
abbyalmaraz22 7 months ago
(cont) however Gabe is the biological father of Lilia just as much as you are, if he is saying he wants to step up and wants joint custody like this... maybe you should all try it and just see how it works out?
just my opinion (:
i wish you the best!
Tferencz93 7 months ago
okay... well i don't mean to attack anything you've said in this video... or criticize you cuz I know it must be hard for you with all this going on.
But... you did say that you want him to spend more time with Lilia.. maybe 50% wouldn't be such a bad thing. Yeah, he wouldn't be paying child support, but he would be in her life more often. thats what matters, right? I do see the problem of having no stable living environment if that happens, so i know what you mean. however.. (cont)
Tferencz93 7 months ago
you say that you dont want to keep Lilia from her dad, yet you dont want to grant him half custody? sure he doesnt want to pay child support but he will be spending that time with her that you were complaining about earlier in the video. you are being pretty hypocritical and making it sound like you rather keep her from him just to get the money. Im pretty sure that he wouldnt want all his private business put on blast like this too. Youre making him sound like a bad father for wanting custody.
prochellelynn 7 months ago 2
Jess :) You're so mature, really =)
Angelalalynn 7 months ago
Hey Jess! I use to watch your videos throughout your entire pregnancy until the labor and delivery video, and then stopped because I had my own daughter to deliver. =) She was born July 13, 2010 and it's been a whole busy year now and I'm just getting back to your videos. A lot has happened it seems and I'm sorry to hear that your relationship is at where it is right now. But I look forward to catching up on all of your videos!!! :)
heathersosa 7 months ago
jess i just have to say i have followed your videos for a while and i commend you for what your doing she is your daughter and gabes but your her mother your a amAZING mom dont forget that :)
jesusthinksiamtodie4 7 months ago
Totally off subject but Jess whats that on ur chest?
Moonpie84 7 months ago
SMH at you people!!! I mean if you don't like it dont watch it!! If your gonna talk shit why you even watch it?!
junior21908 7 months ago
I dnt care who these ppl are just dont feed the this bs and your lies
SPYproductions101 7 months ago
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sterlingstar93x 7 months ago
@SPYproductions101 AND she is NOT a horrible mom.. is anyone perfect no people make mistakes like the ones you are making right now by posting shit like this on her video grow some balls and say it to her face if you know her so well.. i think she is a great mom she is getting no help from the father and she is doing it ALL by her self.. and now she finally has help so give her a break if Gabe really wanted liliah he would have taken legal action by now that just shows how uncommited he reallyis
sterlingstar93x 7 months ago
@sterlingstar93x How do u know that she is not getting help from Gabe??.. Just bcoz she said in her video ( She has given her PO BOX. May be she wants people like you to support her financialy) According to you if he has not taken legal action.. means he does not love Lilia ? Thats your own stupid assumption.
zzzindagirocks 7 months ago
@zzzindagirocks Because she said she doesn' t get child support and he has only seen her a hand full of times in how ever many months that isn't much heIp.. I never said he didn't love her he wants 50% custody because he doesn't want to pay child support and what i was saying was if he really wanted her 50% of the time he would have done it months ago not now. Sorry i should have breaken it down in simpler terms for your dumbass :D
sterlingstar93x 7 months ago
@cheyanne2010 actually i know them both! and i know that jess is putting lilia in a bad enviornment already. Actually he does get her SOMETIMES on the weekends but you know if he even asked her to see the baby anytime in between she would deny and say she is busy. She has all of these pictures of her and drake and the name of her channel is GABEANDJESSS. I mean a lot of people do watch for jess and lilia but where are pictures of her and her father? I mean yeah drake is cuter then gabe but why
SPYproductions101 7 months ago
you jess for not letting gabe see his daughter on a regular basis because it's not healthy and then having drake living with you going to get your own house that your grandma is helping you with is not healthy. you aren't even giving gabe a chance to be a dad. you're a horrible mom.
SPYproductions101 7 months ago
she never even gives gabe a chance to be a father to his daughter because all she has time for is drake. Drake tries to be lilias dad when she isn't even related to him. What sick person would put their own daughter in a bathtub NAKED with her boyfriend? I think that gabe SHOULD get 50% of lilia because all jess and drake are doing is setting a bad example for her daughter. taking a bath with someone who isn't daddy is NOT okay. There should be some legal action taken here. And as far as
SPYproductions101 7 months ago
@SPYproductions101 If you know Jess and Gabe why are you bring this drama on the computer and hideing behind your computer? YOU ARE A LOSER who has no life so you have to get in the middle of peoples lives on the computer..
sterlingstar93x 7 months ago
@SPYproductions101 I have to agree with you on this. Another man should NEVER get into the bath tub with a little girl, even if he has shorts on! I feel that Jess is making some bad choices here based on her new beau. This is one reason why people shouldn't have kids outside of marriage. Its so hard for the child, and unfair. Why would Drake get Lilia's name tatted on him? Thats just strange.... I know shes young and when she looks back on this, shes gonna say "WTH was I thinking?"
jsandlin08 6 months ago
@zzzindagirocks get a life
karanovich100 7 months ago
When my twin and I were growing up we also got to be with our dad every other weekend, I think its best also ecspecially when the mother is the one who took care of the child alone in the first place!!!
AshleyMaynic 7 months ago
I guess the novelty of having a baby wore off. Custody aside, he should WANT to support his child. I've only seen Gabe in videos, but he seems to love Lilia very much. I can't understand why he wouldn't want to see her, much less support her. Even if it's setting up a trust fund for college, that would be better than nothing. It kills my soul to see that sweet little face and know she's in the middle of something no child should be in the middle of.
lilblondehooker 7 months ago
i really hope u guys get things sorted out because i know how hard it is , my mom is going thru the same thing as u . right now im still with my bf but we could break up at anytime and i dont wana have to go thru this
nonnieebabeee2 7 months ago
I hope you get that written agreement soon. This sounds like such a stressful situation.
Fuleadeare 7 months ago
@oswestryGIRL I dont even know what your talking about your comment doesnt make any since..
cami805 7 months ago
I wasnt trying to be rude im just saying I hope you dont feel obligated to put every single aspect of your life on youtube.. I dont think that was inappropriate im just saying thats was the only topic you have said you wont talk about..
cami805 7 months ago
In most cases that I know of the main care taker has custody with the other parent having visitation rights. Its great that you are documenting everything keep doing that. hope I helped some. you are a great mom and lilia is beautiful i watched your videos all through my pregancy lilia was bor like a month or two before my son. its nice to get to watch the stages lilia is going through and how you are dealing with certain things. I have so much respect for you and really love your videos. =]
Colinsmommy2010 7 months ago
you are an amazing mother and I completely understand where you are coming from about Gabe having 50% custody. If you have Lilia 95% of the time and all of a sudden he wants 50% that would not be god for her to swtch over like that. My entire life my parents badled over custody of me and I can say at least in my state for a father to ger 50% custody of the child without the mothers consent that is very hard to obtain unless he shows that the moher is unfiit wich you def arent!
Colinsmommy2010 7 months ago
i think its so dumb when dads dont pay child support cuz the court is gonna ask more money then u would. men are dumb
lessthan3makeup1 7 months ago
You are very strong, Jessica. My son's father does not know how to be a father. I know you expressed that you like two parents to be involved but he would hurt my son so he's not. I thought long and hard about whether to get support from him and I decided no because I didn't want him to have any legal way to take him away from me. I think you're doing amazingly with Lilia and you're being very smart. It's hard to put your personal feelings back in order to do the right thing.
adrienne0516 7 months ago
Jessica has shared her life with people that she doesn't even know. I give her HUGE props for being confident in her lifestyle to share with the people who love to watch her. I find her inspiring, and if you don't like what she says or her videos. DONT WATCH THEM. Plan and simple. Keep your negative comments to yourself.
ava2227 7 months ago 4
Oh man, I'm sorry you're going through this right now :( I hope you and Gabe won't fall out if you haven't already. By the way, I really like your hair in this video, it suits you :)
BlackSabbathFan1985 7 months ago
i hope this problem has a solution for it soon. i so agree with you trying to do wats best for your baby girl!! as for Gabe hes the one missing out on some moments of his daughter's life he wont be able to see again. she would only be this age for so long. stay positive!! and i hope the best for u and ur family!
chairaDreamz 7 months ago
So he gets her every other weekend, but in between he asks to see her when it is convenient for him? SMH, men... Anway, if he agreed to the every other weekend thing - he should pay some sort of child support. IMHO
MandieRenee07 7 months ago
he should definately not get 50% custody if he's not paying any child support!! does he think its free to raise a child!?!
lilygreen12 7 months ago
@zzzindagirocks seriously? if you dont watch jessicas videos for anything other than to judge, then dont bother commenting. its rude & with all the other shi* she goes thru, why add any other bother for no effing reason? no one said you had to beileve her.. & this has absolutley nothing to do with you! so leave it alone bc her true subbies, care about her! & she helps many maanny people!
itsalyssarenee 7 months ago
so many of these people have no idea what they are talking about. as mothers we deserve and earn the right to have our child more then the father. if gabe wasnt around and still continues not to pay he cant not randomly demand 50/50. that boogious! your a great mommy and i support you :)
hantay9 7 months ago
@zzzindagirocks You don't have to believe anything I say if you don't want to. But how would it help me at all what-so-ever to lie about something like this on youtube to random people I don't know? I don't make videos like this just to deceive people, I make them so that people in similar situations can relate to someone. Yes, Drake spends wayyy more time with Lilia than Gabe does. It doesn't bother me if you don't believe me, that's your choice. But I know that what I'm saying is the truth.
GabeandJesss 7 months ago 34
@GabeandJesss I do not know who are u making these videos for. If u want to share ur life with the people then give people right to question you. If you do not bother what people say about you then people should also think that what they are viewing, reading or listening coming through reliable source and based on truth.
zzzindagirocks 7 months ago 4
my advice would be to definitely take this down... you should seek legal aid - it's free in florida depending on your income, which shouldn't be an issue since you don't really work. i would also suggest to not even discuss custody/child support even after everything is settled in court... DEFINITELY document everything imaginable [very glad to hear that you already were], just not on the internet. it's truly nobody's business and could really cause issues for you.
thebabymuse 7 months ago
oh goodness Jess I know exactly where you are coming from. I have not yet gotten ANY support from my daughters father.. I filed before January of this year and STILL they are beating me around the bush.. he rescheduled it til the end of august.. its just RIDICULOUS!!
xolyssa09xo 7 months ago
I think you are a smart cookie because for him to ask for 50% custody is to dodge child support... however, consider taking this video down. Youre going to have to fight him in court and a vid like this could be twisted against you.
sunmaidliz 7 months ago 3
You REALLY need to take this down. Whether you feel that you didn't say anything that could bite you in the ass, you made this video before any legal issues were resolved. I am a grown mother of 2. You need to remove this. Your custody issues are no one's business.
bcashmom12 7 months ago 6
@bcashmom12 I agree with you 100%. THis is one aspect of her life she doesnt need to share. Hopefully she realizes that.
sunmaidliz 7 months ago
Drake is cool but you do not now if hes gonna be around forever and to give him that much advantage over Gabe is wrong because technically drakes lives with you and your makin him apart of Lilias life more that her father. Come on jess do a lil more thinking girl!
PrincessTeeBeautyBk 7 months ago 5
Honestly girl i feel baby for Lilia it sucks that its going down like this. However that every other weekend stuff is not fair weather he did that for child support or not its still his daughter! As mothers you do what you have to do not what you want 7 i think u are doing and AWESOME job with Lilia. & if he doesnt wanna pay child support take his ass to court and give him the business but that 80/20 thing is wrong & the fact that you have your boyfriend around more than him is a bit much.
PrincessTeeBeautyBk 7 months ago
Just because custody is 50/50, doesn't mean he isn't obligated to pay child support. It would be less of course. Our friends live in Michigan and he still pays. You might want to look into that.
beyondmyfreedom 7 months ago
it seems like since your the mother and you were never married that you would get the final say
JBRplus1 7 months ago
I've Never asked for childsuport to the father of my 2 daughters My Actual Husband wont let me.he says is better that way .he dont have the right to ask to see them or taken them with him ...He knows where we live my phone # if he dont call is cuz his not interest on being a father so why Bother Askin for help to some1 who the word father is clearly to Big for him.So dont expect nothin from Hin Jess just keep doing what u doin and when she grows up she is gona know who was there 4 her ..
donnela83 7 months ago
It's not wrong to keep a child or children from their parents when the parent(s) are abusive or if there is a situation where it's not healthy for the child. My parents have been been divorced for 14 years and I'm 21 with a child whose father is not in our lives at all and that really is the best thing. My father should not be in my life or my brothers and I feel that my son's father needs to stay out of our lives. So under the correct circumstances, it's better for parent(s) to not be there.
UniqueVanilla 7 months ago
I knew it!! Just like the father of my son! But at least he tries to act interested. The state chased his dad down, I wanted him to stay away. His drug use and inconsistency was more unhealthy for my child than it was him not seeing his biological father. When his dad got 30 consecutive days with him (he is now 8). I started the adoption process and now I nor he is the parent of my son. My parents adopted my son. Now he has 0% rights to my son and I'm happy with it.
PrincessDebiLA21 7 months ago
@PrincessDebiLA21 ....LOL BTW, I meant Gabe acts interested...sort of.
PrincessDebiLA21 7 months ago
when I was a baby and until I was like 7 years old, my dad came over to my moms house every other weekend. Mostly when my mom had work-weekends.
When I was old enough to take the bus by myself I visited him about 1 day every week. I rearly slept at his house because he moved alot and I didnt have my own room. And of course some extra days and weekends if there was something special.
That worked out great for us and when I got older I was able to decide for myself :)
ChibiAnna 7 months ago
Im 15 and my parents have been divorced scinse i was 7. I was 50/50 at each parent.. I got bad grades for all the stress and felt like i was moving every week. Now I live 80/20 .. and i love it so much more.. My parents know i love them just as much even tho I chose not to be 50/50.. And im lucky I know that.. Am a happy girl now.. Hope everything works out and you get your way.. You are so inspiring.. XOXO
Karroo96 7 months ago
I really hope all of this ends well. You'll probably end up having a compromise so maybe if his every second weekend goes for an extra day or two, or if he sees her every weekend of something like that. I'm really glad you're trying to make sure Lilia still sees her dad, so many people try to take sole custody and it is important Gabe is in Lilia's life.
Good luck!
ToyletGnome 7 months ago
Wow, I am a new mom too, my daughter is about two months younger than Lilia, my husband and I almost divorced a few months back and I didn't know what the hell I was going to do, you are an inspiring woman.
JulysTanzanite 7 months ago
I think kyleandcarissa is right.. I dont think u should have posted this til after the written agreement because if gabe sees this all its gonna do is piss him off... Just because people ask you tons of questions about your personal life you shouldnt feel obligated to post everything... So far you and drakes sex routein is the first thing ive seen you not speak about..
cami805 7 months ago 9
@cami805 If I didn't want to post it then I wouldn't. You have no idea how many messages I get daily about how much I've helped people that are in the same situation as I am. There's not that much information out there about how to handle certain situations and I'm very happy that I can influence people's life in a positive way and I enjoy making videos about how I'm dealing (cont..)
GabeandJesss 7 months ago 11
@cami805 (cont..) with life. It shows people how extremely difficult it is. But really? Mine and Drake's sex routine? That's extremely inappropriate to say.. JS
GabeandJesss 7 months ago 14
@cami805 should anyone talk about their sex routine tbh myself and my partner do NOT say oh sex sex between 3 and 4 monday the lunch then 6 and 7 wednesday as an EXAMPLE as he is in the army, who does that? xx
oswestryGIRL 7 months ago
@cami805 Is intimacy supposed to be a routine? I don't know about you, but I wouldn't want my bf and I to be on a schedule when it comes to being intimate with one another.
NoDumbBlonde04 6 months ago
hey jess, even though he doesnt pay child support, you clearly know how to manage your money well because lilia doesnt seem deprived of anything! you give her everything she needs even tho he doesnt pay support
youve done really well! kudos! but i know it would be a lot! easier if and when he pays support
kaitlyn6415 7 months ago 29
@gabeandjesss you should do it :) you're experience with your first love and how youve changed.
ItsBrandy93 7 months ago
you go girl
03Terell 7 months ago
My friend has done the every other weekend with her son since he was a year old and he is now 10
Basically, his dad gets him every other weekend, and one night a week. Plus two consecutive weeks in the summer once he turned 5. She also gets child support.
Fight for what is best for you and your daughter. Good Luck!
smallfries87 7 months ago
Jess i could be wrong but this video was maybe a bad idea? What if Gabe doesnt realise he doesnt have to give her back to you, then sees this video. I don't think you should have posted this until after you had a writen agreement...
KyleandCarissa 7 months ago 7
I think it's ridiculous that all of a sudden somoene that saw their little girl 34 hours out of the week wants to have her 50% of the time!? But won't pay child support? Doesn't he realize he'll have to pay probably way more for her if she was living with him half the time. Just like you are footing ALL of the bill for Lilia now. That's just plain crazy! Definitely do all you can to see that Lilia gets back child support and the child support she needs and deserves! Good luck to you Jess! :)
MandaPanda0929 7 months ago 3
what a douche! What kind of father wouldn't want to support their child?! Geez Good Luck with all of that! :)
TheBrittbrat2341 7 months ago 2
You are your daughters best advocate, so you do what you have to do. I grew up in the same situation and it will get easier as Lilia grows and can make decisions for herself about where she wants to be. Until then, you know her better than anyone and you seem mature enough to make decisions for her based on that and not on anger or revenge. Lilia is lucky to have a mom who is strong enough to stand up for her even if it's the more difficult road for you.
effiesmommy 7 months ago
Advice from experience: Its true about the whole keeping Gabe from Lilia would be wrong. But dont ever under estimate. No matter how unlikely it seems that he would keep Lilia. Court battles take very long and if he wanted to, he could keep her until it all got sorted out. Not only that, but he could find reasons where theres none to use against you in court. Perhaps he could come to your house to see her? Just a thought. Im a family law student so i thought id shed light on this.
TheTatianaMichelle 7 months ago
You should tell the court house the months he did not pay for child support. I don't think its fair for you to be supporting your child on your own you both are young and maybe don't have an stable job BUT come on he is a man he needs to support his offspring no matter what age!!! I hope everything works best for both of you (lilia and you). and let him pay his part of being a parent!! XOXOX from NY :)
lorenajenny 7 months ago
I think if he gets the joint custody or 50% custody from the court he can't turn around and say well Jessica sorry I can't take her he has to obey it so if he wants it he has no choice but to follow through. As a child of sole custody only seeing my dad on the weekends or whenever he wanted to isn't healthy but my dad also was abuses drugs and drinking. So I hope everything works out for you and you guys can finally agree.
Steph11299 7 months ago
I think it really depends on who lilia is more comfortable with to base how much time she spends with him. I agree 50% is WAY wrong. But I see my dad every other weekend and I wish I could see him more. I think what you Guys settled on is good! It's really mature of you both. As for child support, he shouldn't have to have a written agreement. Either way he has to pay it, he's just causing mire stress and time loss for you.
mylifeasallie2011 7 months ago
50% physical custody?!!??!?!?!?!?!?!?!!??!?! JESSICA, YOU ARE THE MOTHER YOU ARE THE ONLYYYYY ONE WHO KNOWS WHATS BESTTT FOR YOUR DAUGHTER!!!!!!! STAND UP FOR WHAT YOU BELIEVE IN... I DON'T SEE WHY HE WOULDN'T WANT TO PAY ANY MONEY FOR HIS CHILD!!! BEST OF LUCK TO YOU AND LILIA :D
LAGRIMAS13LPZ 7 months ago
Im sorry you have to go through all this! It must be really hard.
StacyFacey 7 months ago
I left a verbal/emotional abusive relationship in early June, got a laywer, and set up child support and custody in late June this year. He wants to work things out, but I believe he just wants to get out of the child support. He has two other children who haven't seen any money for a year. I really doubt I will see child support for our 3 month old, but as long as I have custody of her, I'm sure she will be safe. We will see what the future hold for us. Good luck in your child support/custody.
wordstoasong 7 months ago
My advice is simply don't trust men u should get the written agreement soon so he can't take full custody of her and if he does I will fly down there and murder him
GreenLeaflyFlower 7 months ago
Its so sad that women have to get court orders in order to get men to pay for a child they helped bring in to the world. But that's the way it has to be. Stay strong and keep up with the court system because that is they only way you will ever see a dime from him for Lilia. You are a wonderful mother.
vhv7052 7 months ago
From personal experience from mum you are doing the right thing I think you should def take care of Lilia majority of The time because you do a brilliant job and consistent. Fathers input is also vital BUT surely should get some financial assistance. Wish you luck take care and stay blessed
londonpie72 7 months ago
u r a very mature person, I think hat you are handeling this situation the best you can, good luck with the child support thing by the way
KyraIsFunny14 7 months ago
Just wondering Jessica when Lilia goes over Gabe's house do you provide the diapers her clothes etc.? Or does he buy diapers or anything like that when she's over there? Cause if it isn't that's really messed up.
NicolleBerry 7 months ago
@NicolleBerry No he buys stuff for over there. I used to provide them but I told him if he's not gunna pay then he has to buy stuff for over there at least. I bought her bed, swing, and some clothes that he has over there though. Ugh.
GabeandJesss 7 months ago
@GabeandJesss wow Jessica I feel really bad for you >:| I hope things work out for you guys. Most importantly for Lilia's sake. I really feel for you when you said you're scared that he might keep Lilia from you God forbid that ever happens! Stay strong! God bless. Love Nicolle:)
NicolleBerry 7 months ago
I don't know how it works in the States but up here in Canada if the father refuses to pay Child Support the "state" can go in and garnish his wages.. Meaning every month x amount of money comes of his pay check whether he like it or not. I am not sure how you go about getting this out in place but I hop