The Chronicles of Chris-chan: SMEAGOL [8/30/09]

[doc1008]

CALL THE POLICE



[videogamenostalgia]

The internal struggle of two separate conflicting personalities, as represented by the physical bend of the shaft of the penis, as two personalities manifest in two completely different angles...

[10191927]

Chris: "Those filthy little Trolls's, they steals the precious from us, they tooks our 'China!

Christian: "There is a way to get rid of the Trolls once and for all"

Chris: "Oh, you mean..."

Christian: "Yes my precious, she's always hungry"

Chris: "Yes...but white knights don't taste very good do they?"

Christian: "No, not atoll."

Christian: "We will lead them to the snorlax through the secret passage"

Chris: "And then we, we gets the precious?"

Christian: "Yes".

[YUCKSTERTHUNDER]

The Strange Case of Dr. Aspergers & Mr. Virginity .

[AltoCat1]

The fail has been doubled!

[Ditherliss]

So THAT'S where all the posters from 789chan come from!

[theluckynames]

Что?? Chris is crazy. this has to be his most disturbing video ever.

[Inuboy1000]

He is insane...

[SupaMarioX]

I really think this manchild is a troll.

[Udany147]

@SupaMarioX He isn't - he tried that once and it backfired on hm.

[444Tazer]

So... Christian's biggest threat... is Christopher.

[JohnMooreification]

I feel real sorry for Christopher, having to live in Christian's head for almost two decades...

I wouldn't last two hours.

[SlashFirestorm]

As Gollum once said, "YOU DON'T HAVE ANY FRIENDS. NOBODY LIKES YOU."

[DoctorBeardface]

I want Christopher to beat the living shit out of Christian.

[mrslash11]

The psychiatrist made is so two personalities could have a full conversation with each other? I smell dark magic.

[TheBlackYousa]

What the fucking jesus berries

[MrSparklehooves]

@TheBlackYousa good reaction

[LauraIsPink]

the punch is at 0:57.

[rawrvintageisclassic]

am i the only one who lawls over replaying the scene where Chris Chan has punched himself in the face? he's full of comedy gold!! XD

[QuicklimeTime]

Two completely different people inhabiting the same body. Ergo, whenever Chris masturbates, he is performing a handjob to his alternate self, and thus regularly performs a homosexual act.

Discuss.

[SinDawg030]

@QuicklimeTime Troll science at its finest. Nobel prize for you.

[SESdisciple]

Even CWC's mental stability trolls him.

[nucleardeath07]

What the hell just happened? I'm so confused.

[AlanSmithee06]

@nucleardeath07 A desperate plea for help, but he couldn't sustain it for very long.  Hope that helps.

[IDeafpool]

HEY CHRIS WANNA FUCK? Sure Christian 'ol buddy. it's not gay since we are the same person.

[SirHprdgn]

One day Chris will hopefully realise that if you want people to take you seriously, you don't make videos with a wall of toys in the background.

[sub2me4areview]

@SirHprdgn Or, you know, make a video were you pretend to have a split personality.

[Narkuta1228]

If only Sauron could see this...

[6hundred3score6]

Clyde Cash, fictional character, single handedly ruined his life.

LUlz

[halodystroyer44]

curse them, we hates them, its ours it is...my...SONICHU!

[otakukangaroo]

The Strange Case of Dr. Jeckyl & Mr. Heckle.

[mordredt02]

Christian: "You're absolutely right. But I'm ignoring you completely."

Christopher: "What did the five fingers say to the face?" *punch*

He's even an asshole to himself.

[Athils]

Even his Dissociative Identity Disorder is lazy.

[mordredt02]

"Thief! Clyde Cash! We hates it! We hates it forever!"

[videogamenostalgia]

God, Chris actually harasses the mail service and gets them to check his mail. Fuckin' tard...

[ZyxthePest]

"Yep"

That's pretty much sums it all up.

[Shavarnarak]

Nah, I'll call you Ian.

[DoctorBeardface]

Which one's the not retarded one?

[pendejochy]

I love the "THUNK" he makes when he punches himself....

Just goes to show you how empty his head is.....

[Jesterclown17]

@pendejochy

What do you expect? It's all hollowed out.

[Jesterclown17]

0:55

[Jesterclown17]

@Jesterclown17

He needs to hit himself more.

[Aerozyphyr]

@Jesterclown17 not only more,but harder,preferably with a hammer,or some other hard object.

[lamnaa]

I wish that I had seen this when it came out and had no idea what was going on.

[zimmyzimgir]

Chris you greasy fat fuck, how dare you mock people with personality disorders, you have no idea how they work and you have no idea the type of shit they have to deal with everyday of their life. That's pretty funny too considering how easily you get pissed off when people make fun of your autism. This shows you have no empathy for anybody but yourself, and you will even mock other people with disabilities just so you can feel better about yourself. Fuck you, you egotistical cunt.

[Dziuravy]

awwww i'm stoned and yoour comments make no sence

[SOSHaruhi101]

I feel embarassed watching this >.>

[thesideshowman212]

If I start hearing about "nasty hobitses and Shelob", I'm getting the fuck outta here.

[TheShadowyPhantom]

So, he's not getting any boxes? Some girl should send him nudes and a fake e-mail address to him in a box, then see if he e-mails the fake address.

[SabahAlev]

does he see the yellow boxes too?

[Gummy132]

1:33 onwards just shows that he can't even carry a conversation with himself. Jesus man...

[DoctorBeardface]

Such outstanding faggotry condensed into one video.

[HeatLegs]

@DoctorBeardface Great use of the word faggotry.

[SSF280190]

how hilarious!

autistic and schizophrenic!

[TheWickedSmile]

This is awful. Awful, awful news. Bob and Barb had better start sleeping with one eye open, or either Chris or Chris is gonna kill 'em.

[Gigantor38]

We are Ven... er... virgin!

[Carnage1235]

"We are CWC, we do not forgive, we do not forget..... Expect us".

[samuraikarasu]

Double the Chris!

Triple the virginity!

[FromBrazilWithLove]

@samuraikarasu Fuckin hilarious comment man!!!

[Shmuklidooha]

It would be awesome if he got another personality named Ian.

[Syujink0u]

He has just convinced himself that he has multiple personality disorder so that he can get attention and maybe even sympathy AND justify all the shitty things he's done, just like how he has been utilizing his autism to get his parents to keep him in the house.

[TrustabilityLost]

0:56

Did...did he just slap himself?

This man seriously needs to go to therapy, so that he'll stop failing all the time.

[MrNobodysPinealGland]

Fuck you, Chris.

[VampiricDarkDragon]

"My name is Chris: for we are many."

[cubefreak123]

Chris has no idea how Dissociative Identity Disorder works. This is pathetic.

[MorgensternPip]

I....I don't even...

[SlashFirestorm]

WHAT ARE TATERS

[Blahdalizer]

Morshu shat out Chris Chan, Chris Chan ate someone named Christopher, and Morshu is destened to eat Chris Chan.

[VelLucio]

This is more or less a summarizing of the whole video: Chris can't act to save face.

[Ragerel]

another pathetic attempt by Chris to gain sympathy from others

[Koronii]

Um.... what is he trying to do here?

[MoarOfTehRawkege]

We can't be entirely certain he's trying to do anything. Knowing Chris, Multiple Personality Disorder is a very real possibility,

[MiHiVidz]

@MoarOfTehRawkege Nope. Chris's knowledge of MPD (Multiple Personality Disorder) derives solely from what he's seen in old cartoons and bad sitcoms. I'm offended that he thought we'd fall for this shit.

[NitroRhapsody]

I am offended.

Btw, I liked the part where you punched yourself in the face.

[Ranika]

That isn't how DID works Chris. If you're going to fake another mental disorder in an attempt to get sympathy, you could at least research it a bit. However, I'm sure that actually learning about something would take too much of your precious time away from buying video games you'll never play, masturbation, and, judging by your weight and general appearance, eating whole sticks of butter.

[TubularMonkey]

We hates the trolls! They're wicked, tricksy, false! We ought to wring their filthy little necks!

[Sklurch]

What if CWC turned out to be the world's greatest method actor?

[gymclasshero88]

thats what i have been saying on alot of videos and no one has been listening on me..i seriously believe cwc is a fake..

[SethRios003]

ummm wow, just wow

[MikuMech]

I actually acted like this once.

The key difference being Chris is nearly 30 and I was in 5th grade at the time.

[LocustKingX]

I... wow.

[schnitzal]

Oh also..."Come on yourself"....I think that happens a lot with Chrissy.

[sunburstX]

Well TBH I think this is a great improvement.

[schnitzal]

Oh god...further proving his multiple personality disorder...Holy baby jesus.

[eelnomtih]

He punked that sucker!

[scttscoodoo]

star dates

[112d12d]

hahah wow ims ure this is realy behind the cameras

this dude got a evil satanic retard in him

[TehMonkeyNuffler]

what the fuck did you guys do to him?!

[Shadoboy]

At least try doing a different expression every time you 'change' personalities. Not only rise your tone of voice. Specially lame when you forget your likes as both people...

[scorptatious]

Either he's just trying to get attention, or he has gone insane from isolation from the outside world. Most likely the first one though.

[LemmingFace]

I love how he removes his glasses right before he slaps himself..

[diabeetuslolol]

I'M GOING THLAP HAPPY!

[Shakyamoonie]

This is about as lame as it gets people. This is not some butthurt livejournal user, some myspacefag, some ignorant hatefilled bigot like Hal Turner. I feel that for us as Anons this is something much lulzier. I feel that to go after this lulzcow is a sacred mission for Anonymous.

Do it and use all 7 proxies for great justice. LOL and we shall prevail inshallah.

[nuttsaxify]

in after newfag. :B

[TheYoshi2021]

Call an exorcist. We need to get rid of the evil soul of Ian.

[turtleman9111]

lolXD good idea XD

[MOOOSSSHHH]

chris, will you marry me?

[nhonho23]

I AM STRAIGHT YOU HOMO

[turtleman9111]

dude u need a psychiatrist

[balukaaaa91]

nope, he needs a bullet in the head

[turtleman9111]

wat a loser god u suck chrischan

[Snoofalah]

I have a feeling that his little "secondary character" is the one ordering the dildos.

[MankindCartoons]

AUTISTIC

[Aultmanb]

:50 - :57

What the fuck did he say?

[leopordls]

I didn't know what the fuck he said from :00 to 1:42

[Aultmanb]

I don't either. But it probably involves something with being autistic.

[KajexFiredrake]

And being a virgin. And consisting of fail.

[TiffanyDoll]

-_-" Chris....

[noitcurtsnocnacnuD]

Me, Myself & Autism

[ElectricShark]

@noitcurtsnocnacnuD,

Please don't think Autistic people are all like this.

This guy is such a giant trainwreck.

Instead of "Chris Chan", he should be named "Chris Trainwreck."

He really is a sad, pathetic creature.

[noitcurtsnocnacnuD]

@ElectricShark Chris Chan is a tangled web of fail, I wouldn't dare try and define him by any single attribute, and I certainly meant no offence to those autistics who battle the odds to make something of them selves.

[ElectricShark]

@noitcurtsnocnacnuD,

Thank you.

Chris Chan is definetly a tangled web of fail.

[zombieslayer87]

Hmmm lemme guess.... he's trying to get people to think that he's schizophrenic now????? hahaha

[MewLime]

JUST CALL US CHRIS!

Ha ha, I love how Christopher pretty much disappeared when Chris started raging at Vivian. Way to be consistent, Chrissy.

[GUInterface]

This reminds me of that Tales from the Crypt episode with the rock band manager having an ear infection and his conscience talking to him.

[DeadLockRants]

And then he bashes that chick's head in with a guitar and takes a few bucks from a safe? I can barely remember that.

[GUInterface]

Yeah, that's the one.

[M8DMAN]

I love that episode.

[iyasaekki]

The chick was Katey Sagal, right? That was a hilarious episode.

[Poever]

there's been two videos since this. Be sure to add them to the playlist.

[xTacticalxDarkx]

...wow...his false DID is depressing to watch. He's making himself look like a major-league douchebag, while simultaneously providing the rest of the net with more fodder for making fun of him, and alienating himself from people who actually have DID.

Also, it's simply a pathetic attempt to avoid being trolled for being IBACHandler (the real imposter)

It hurts to watch.

[allhailkingarthur]

he's just vying for attention. Multiple personality disorder is very very rare.

[TheBillyHatcher]

lol with livejournal you'd think it was an epidemic

[RFK31]

"Come on man!"

"Cum on yourself!"

tee hee.

[chikitabowow]

omfg, is this guy still alive?

[Garlannd]

somehow

[lollercoastersoflove]

christopher, calm down.

[spitlord]

No. You calm down.

[bkisme]

0:57 hurr

[iyasaekki]

His mind is too shallow to have room for another personality.

[ChristopherWChandler]

For the love of Godbear, let me come out of the closet, Christian!

[tehDman]

So he's a schizo now? Jesus.

[RocMegamanX]

And I thought Chris creating a made-up sister named CRYSTAL was bad.

[badlad99]

The troll'sis stole our medallion and we wants it back precious.

[XxraebodepxX]

Leonard Bearstein has a lot to answer to. Damn Bear conductor, confusing a kid like that. The American Rabbit, also.

[drinkmalk]

If Chris is gonna continue this double personality BS, he should be uploading vids twice as fast. This is lame. He's just sitting on his fat ass jerking off to Rosechu tranny fanart.

[Raellus]

Seeing as he has Boku no Pico favorited, I'd guess he's also masturbating to shota.

[TrenzorZ]

What is Boku No Pico?

[Raellus]

A yaoi where some 30 year old dude has sex with a 12 year old boy, multiple times.

[TrenzorZ]

Took a look at it not horrible...all I can say is that there parents better pay some close supervision on their children when  chris-chan is on the loose because evidently he's probally still continuing with his "Love" Quest.

[raymoohackuray]

I wouldn't be surprised if he's developed a pickle fetish by now.

[ChaosKnightXD]

Chris is apparently using this split personality to come out of the closet or at least that is what it seems. He doesn't have multiple personalities though he's just one fat stupid autistic manchild who loves the cock but is too immature and homophobic to accept it.

[betterthanurbutt]

i'm sure this is sad in some way

i don't see it tho

i just see angry red hatred

and manboobs

[XgenArea51]

Oh dear

[DerrvilleProductions]

Hes such a awesome troll. He WINS it all!!!

[gubbanatah]

weakest attempt at trolling ever.

[deltafoverdeltax]

I'm guessing there'd be a lot of guy-on-guy action if it were.

[MilesTailsProwe]

wtf is this and WHATS Wrong with this man

[deltafoverdeltax]

This is Chris-chan reading a script about having multiple personalities in his bedroom full of kids toys in his parents house. He has autism and his parents are old and don't have a lot of energy so they apparently just said "fuck it" and pretty much gave him free reign to develop his idiosyncratic autistic bullshit to the maximum human potential. He thinks he's fighting the trolls by continuing to humiliate himself even though the people telling him to stop only have his best interests in mind.

[koook160]

Oh poor White Knights. Never had a chance with the manchild.

[deltafoverdeltax]

He certainly does love to injure and alienate the only people who mean him well.

[TiniestViolin]

Has anyone really been far even as decided to use even go want to do look more like?

[MilkWeaboo]

chris is a bad actor.

[punipunipunisher]

If you think he's "bad actor" here, think about when ever he behaved believeable like a normal human being would? He never did, he's just always trying!

[dykyo]

Chris seems to think that if you delete the video, you erase its memory from the internet.

[MINISLASH0]

"that was like years ago when we saw the psychiatrist"

1:32

ugh....

[ShinyMarshtomp]

lol chris deleted this

[subcoolfl]

stop sending the boxes we didn't get? lulz

[SuperTimeParadox]

I think it is about time Ian stops his shit now.

[MacraStraba]

WTF is Ian trying to achieve?

[DowJonesss]

........what

[Thumbandfingerglory]

They are going to lock you away for a long time.

[Aldrasio]

Hahaha, that's not how DPD works.

[sweetlittlecannibal]

As a student majoring in psychology this is the one of the lulziest things I've seen Chris do. I'm not sure what he's trying to accomplish, but I'm sure he's missed the mark by a hundred fucking feet.

[TehPenar]

psych majors are retarded lol

[ChromeTruckNutz]

Wow. I've never seen split personality disorder faked so badly. You are a terrible actor, Ian.

[SpecialKyo]

just because he's faking batshit insane doesn't mean he's not batshit insane.

[ILoveShinyStuff]

What...the fuck?

Methinks you require another visit to your psychiatrist. Either that, or a refund for your last session.

What have you hobbitses done to him?