Ahh, I feel this way too sometimes. Not even a year ago I pondered constantly as to if I could just be happy as a girl. You know, to make my family happy. I started dressing in girl's clothing. It worked (sort of) for maybe two weeks, until I fell into a horrible depression so I stopped trying to be cis gendered after that. I felt irrationally as though i've let my family down in some aspect. That hurt a lot. I guess i'll just have to trust in them to find the strength to accept it and move on.
You're cute! But lol, I'm not the first one to post that :p ^^ Sounds like I have competition! You had me at "The wall's cool too!" <3 I've seen a few of your videos, and I love you already :p
You don't suck. It's a societal issue of suck, I think. You're perfect. Keep doing what you're doing and hopefully one day we can overthrow the system of suck and have a big party.
I think you are an awesome person! Gender is much like race, it doesn't matter. Some people might try hard to tell you otherwise, but the truth is simple; we are all humans, and that is all that matters. We all have more in common, compared with what we do not. Nothing but respect from Denmark (huzzah, this struggle is global!).
I really hesitate to consider myself transgender because every definition contrasts it with cisgender or "identifying with members of the opposite gender." But I don't know what that means. So far as I can tell the only difference is that women wear a different cuts of pants and shirts and I've wanted to wear a skirt since I was three. Shouldn't be possible for us to understand gender from an outside perspective, and trans/non-gender on it's own terms?
With my identity being "non-gendered", I will forever fail at bringing together my internal experience and how society experiences me. I mean, no one will ever look at anyone and go "oh, that's a non-gender!". No, they will spend epic amounts of time trying to figure out if someone is one or the other or a combination thereof, but never if they are none of the above. But I'm ok with that. so yeah, I suck at gender, especially my own XD
Great video, great concepts. I was a bit unimpressed by someone at one point talking about the negativity of societal constructs, and yet the next point using the word "polygamy" as a negative. For someone open minded to people choosing or ignoring gender, I would think you might also be accepting of people who see monogamy the same way. Polyamory is alright, y'all.
Anyway, just nitpicking, but something I thought was important. Hooray for genderfork for leading me here!
@HipsterFriend Totally valid point. I am certainly not opposed to polyamory. It's more that, in a split second choice of words, I thoughtlessly went for something that somewhat tried to imply 'fucking everything that moves to mindlessly spread genetic material". Also, I think that just about anyone who would say that 'transexuality is immoral because it's unnatural" would be opposed to polygamy. I defintely see and appreciate where you're coming from, though.
holy crap this is excatly how I feel everything you explained made so much sense too me I seriously thought I was the only person in the world with how I see myself gender wise, and it's been difficult as hell trying to explain it to people it's like me and gender have been close buds sense I was a little "girl" taking this journey but something just changes we start to fight and bicker and just all out brawl but know I get it me and gender just don't click. I love that!
What youre describing sounds like Pomogender. Pomo is like.. the label for those who dont want labels. It covers anything and everything. You cant go wrong.
I just want to say that I feel the exact same way! I feel like people have different skill sets... some people are good at math. And gender is definitely not my strong suit.
honestly, don't worry about it. different cultures have different genders. i don't really know, but maybe some cultures are monogendered. at the end of the day, i don't think you suck at gender. you're just breaking the rules we have for it here, like a kid who changes the rules while playing handball. and that's okay. in fact, i like it.
i havent come to any conclusions about my gender. female is okay for me but i get called "monsieur" all the time (cuz i live in quebec) and that's just as inaccurate as "madame". my conclusion is that lack of a conclusion is okay. i'm just me. whatever.
Like every magic trick, it's all about the illusion. I'm sure I could pass if I weren't such a nancy boy and maybe if I hung out with 12 year old boys instead of masculine lesbians.
I can absolutely relate- though I haven't yet been totally okay with failure. I'm reaching a point where I'm starting to see that gender and me might just never get along. Thanks for putting words (and, of course, colourful metaphors) to this! I think I'm feeling just a little bit empowered about my own gender fail right now.
Your metaphors... lol I like them. For me, it's like how I play putt-putt. I can't just play like everyone else and stick to going through the obstacles in the prescribed manner... I have to whack the ball as hard as I can to get a shot off the tree/rock/innocent bystander, and hopefully get close to the hole (in this case, gender role). My ideas and actions toward gender, if people saw them, aren't exactly the usual practice. I'm somewhere mixed up in all the wrong places.lol
Your re-emergences are always not only looked forward to and welcome, but entertaining and insightful to say the least. THANKS FOR BEING YOU!!! we love red, we love red, we love red.
I'm troubled at times because I'm transitioning, but I don't feel like I could possibly fit into either gender, so I feel ya Red. Also, way to be super entertaining ya jitterbug!
Ahh, I feel this way too sometimes. Not even a year ago I pondered constantly as to if I could just be happy as a girl. You know, to make my family happy. I started dressing in girl's clothing. It worked (sort of) for maybe two weeks, until I fell into a horrible depression so I stopped trying to be cis gendered after that. I felt irrationally as though i've let my family down in some aspect. That hurt a lot. I guess i'll just have to trust in them to find the strength to accept it and move on.
TheSnowyice 10 months ago
Haha you look freaking hyper in this. How many cups of coffee did you have!? xD lolz
TheSnowyice 10 months ago
You're cute! But lol, I'm not the first one to post that :p ^^ Sounds like I have competition! You had me at "The wall's cool too!" <3 I've seen a few of your videos, and I love you already :p
gloopiee 11 months ago
You don't suck. It's a societal issue of suck, I think. You're perfect. Keep doing what you're doing and hopefully one day we can overthrow the system of suck and have a big party.
greengirl3986 1 year ago
"Wull, the wall's cool too...hey! It's in the wall!"
xenophile84 1 year ago 2
I think you are an awesome person! Gender is much like race, it doesn't matter. Some people might try hard to tell you otherwise, but the truth is simple; we are all humans, and that is all that matters. We all have more in common, compared with what we do not. Nothing but respect from Denmark (huzzah, this struggle is global!).
Kybrnetik 1 year ago
I really hesitate to consider myself transgender because every definition contrasts it with cisgender or "identifying with members of the opposite gender." But I don't know what that means. So far as I can tell the only difference is that women wear a different cuts of pants and shirts and I've wanted to wear a skirt since I was three. Shouldn't be possible for us to understand gender from an outside perspective, and trans/non-gender on it's own terms?
FreedomIsEquality 1 year ago
With my identity being "non-gendered", I will forever fail at bringing together my internal experience and how society experiences me. I mean, no one will ever look at anyone and go "oh, that's a non-gender!". No, they will spend epic amounts of time trying to figure out if someone is one or the other or a combination thereof, but never if they are none of the above. But I'm ok with that. so yeah, I suck at gender, especially my own XD
gracewatches 1 year ago
Great video, great concepts. I was a bit unimpressed by someone at one point talking about the negativity of societal constructs, and yet the next point using the word "polygamy" as a negative. For someone open minded to people choosing or ignoring gender, I would think you might also be accepting of people who see monogamy the same way. Polyamory is alright, y'all.
Anyway, just nitpicking, but something I thought was important. Hooray for genderfork for leading me here!
HipsterFriend 1 year ago
@HipsterFriend Totally valid point. I am certainly not opposed to polyamory. It's more that, in a split second choice of words, I thoughtlessly went for something that somewhat tried to imply 'fucking everything that moves to mindlessly spread genetic material". Also, I think that just about anyone who would say that 'transexuality is immoral because it's unnatural" would be opposed to polygamy. I defintely see and appreciate where you're coming from, though.
daedsider 1 year ago
holy crap this is excatly how I feel everything you explained made so much sense too me I seriously thought I was the only person in the world with how I see myself gender wise, and it's been difficult as hell trying to explain it to people it's like me and gender have been close buds sense I was a little "girl" taking this journey but something just changes we start to fight and bicker and just all out brawl but know I get it me and gender just don't click. I love that!
bossygirl10 1 year ago
What youre describing sounds like Pomogender. Pomo is like.. the label for those who dont want labels. It covers anything and everything. You cant go wrong.
WolfgangPwnz 1 year ago
I just want to say that I feel the exact same way! I feel like people have different skill sets... some people are good at math. And gender is definitely not my strong suit.
gyspydavy 1 year ago
"...my typical pronoun with people is hermmshoommhim, and kind of a point..." LOL
crazypants2009 2 years ago 11
honestly, don't worry about it. different cultures have different genders. i don't really know, but maybe some cultures are monogendered. at the end of the day, i don't think you suck at gender. you're just breaking the rules we have for it here, like a kid who changes the rules while playing handball. and that's okay. in fact, i like it.
iradgray 2 years ago
i havent come to any conclusions about my gender. female is okay for me but i get called "monsieur" all the time (cuz i live in quebec) and that's just as inaccurate as "madame". my conclusion is that lack of a conclusion is okay. i'm just me. whatever.
RinaMackereth 2 years ago
but there IS more than 2 genders, so if society only has 2, then those people outside those two are never getting gendered correctly. Don't you care?
juliecranford 2 years ago
Soooo do you realize that you have succeeded at failure. Don't let it go to your head because I got ya beat.
51hilman 2 years ago
all gender is performance.
Roxie21 2 years ago
Weeeeee! Genderfail with a side of mayo! That's what I'm ordering for sure. Also, as others have said, props on the hat.
vampyresmiles 2 years ago
Cool hat.
SFMonster 2 years ago
Like every magic trick, it's all about the illusion. I'm sure I could pass if I weren't such a nancy boy and maybe if I hung out with 12 year old boys instead of masculine lesbians.
CrrrustyCrowe 2 years ago
hahaha u are so damn cute!! love ur hat!!
SELKILKT 2 years ago
I liked your metaphors! They were very elucidating, the way good metaphors should be. ^^
browniephage 2 years ago
I can absolutely relate- though I haven't yet been totally okay with failure. I'm reaching a point where I'm starting to see that gender and me might just never get along. Thanks for putting words (and, of course, colourful metaphors) to this! I think I'm feeling just a little bit empowered about my own gender fail right now.
jessethebrave 2 years ago
Your metaphors... lol I like them. For me, it's like how I play putt-putt. I can't just play like everyone else and stick to going through the obstacles in the prescribed manner... I have to whack the ball as hard as I can to get a shot off the tree/rock/innocent bystander, and hopefully get close to the hole (in this case, gender role). My ideas and actions toward gender, if people saw them, aren't exactly the usual practice. I'm somewhere mixed up in all the wrong places.lol
sceirus99 2 years ago
You're adorable. I suck at gender, too.
duplicatekeys 2 years ago 12
Mayonnaise! HAHAHAHA!
BoomTiss 2 years ago
cool cup
thexevilxdude 2 years ago
Oh jeez you are just the cutest little button!
Popeslave 2 years ago
...it's fun watching you on caffeine, Red :) ...failure is the new success. Embrace the failure!
deaddogx 2 years ago
Your re-emergences are always not only looked forward to and welcome, but entertaining and insightful to say the least. THANKS FOR BEING YOU!!! we love red, we love red, we love red.
jake1604 2 years ago
I'm troubled at times because I'm transitioning, but I don't feel like I could possibly fit into either gender, so I feel ya Red. Also, way to be super entertaining ya jitterbug!
figtus 2 years ago
That hat is like some sort of cuteness power-up. <3
5 stars for caffeine!
whatisbeneath 2 years ago
nice ! i love your metaphors :)
noorderloos 2 years ago
im jealous of your hat.
danc3hallkrashr 2 years ago
Red, thanks so much for letting me run around in your head. It's fun. Hugs!
Dweebiedo 2 years ago