This is beautiful, the media always talks about the rape and abuse of women, and as a brainwashed society, everyone omits that it can occur to males and when it is spoken of men and boys are often labeled "weak" and "feminine" and "liars."
Ignoring male victimization is dangerous and damaging -- I agree, but unfortunately male sexual abuse is taken as a joke in todays society. Not only women can be harassed. Men can be assailed too. Psychological damage in both cases can be fatal.
i and my friend were sexually assaulted. my uncle sexually assaulted me, and is now in prison for pedophillia. my friend was raped by his dad. i saw him at a park and punched him right in the face.
we get more of problem then a girl abused cause a girl can talk a boy is like a fag if he say something we should be MAN but we can not talk of what its hurt us
My father gave me a present When I was a boy Thirteen I told nobody I had to forget I failed It smoldered in my forgotten past fifteen years It burst into flame on my twenty eighth birthday It burned so very, very hot It almost killed me
men hardly talk about their rape experiences, b/c they're ashamed that someone violated them. its better to get that shit out in the open. sometimes, the thing you live with is the thing that kills you.
I am glad to see that someone is finallly taking a stand for male victims of sexual abuse. Far too often when males are victimized, the very system that should protect them looks at them as criminals in the making, surely to be predators.
There is no reason for male victims to be treated as potential predators, any more than female victims would be treated as potential predators.
Thank you for giving a voice to all the men who have not found their own voice to speak out against male SXAB!~
men can handle rape better than females. They should keep that shit quiet. And if its a female raping them i find it hard to believe that they are not enjoying it...
keeping it quiet is what keeps it going. not good advice at all. it's comments like these that perpetuates abuse. men do not deserve to be raped, no one does! if they are raped they should be able to come forward and talk about it without feeling like it's their fault. this video is awesome and there should be more so that people can talk about the real issue.
Being forced, persuaded, coerced into sexual intercourse against your will is a definition of rape. Many guys after working a 60 hour week may not be in the mood for sex but can be coerced into it by wives and girlfriends rather than face the consequences. However, this is not classified as rape unless the opposite occurs! Hence marital rape etc.
Men can handle it better. They don't form themselves into feminist collectives and inflate stats to 1 in 4 and go around whining about it.
angelsgirl "Talking someone whos not horny into sex is not rape. Whether your a male or female."
Your right but to some feminist researchers it is. See my reply to menspeakout or Google Researching the "Rape Culture" of America by Christina Hoff Sommers.
I disagree on your comment that statistics are inflated. 1 in 4 is an underestimate of the actual number involved. Sexual assault is one of the most under-reported crimes. Males being even less likely to report due to societal stigmas attached to being a victim.
Menspeakout Not really. The 1 in 4 stat came from a 1985 study by Mary Koss for Ms magazine. A yes to any of these q's was a + for rape. This survey has been disputed since then. 8. Have you had sexual intercourse when you didn't want to because a man gave you alcohol or drugs? 9. Have you had sexual intercourse when you didn't want to because a man threatened or used some degree of physical force (twisting your arm, holding you down, etc.) to make you?
The 1 in 4 stat has since been duplicated more than once. Google the ACE Study, which uses a pool of over 17,000 participants. Anybody whose taken a basic college stats class can look at a study and pick it apart. What we know about stats is that if they can be duplicated multiple times then it is our best indicator that they are accurate. There are other studies who reveal similar results using different menthods than you criticize here. They can't ALL be false,overbloated, and unreliable.
Anchorinthestorm Studies show differing results depending on the questioning and interpretation of the answers. Here is another. "Loise Harris and Associates (1993) was commissioned by the Commonwealth Fund to do a study of women's health. Among the questions asked of its random sample population of 2,500 women was, "In the last five years, have you been a victim of a rape or sexual assault?" Two percent of the respondents said yes; 98 percent said no." Feminists wouldn't like this one!
I understand how stats work. My point is that the questioning has BEEN refined and varied if you see other studies cited by abuse experts, with similar findings. A 25% finding is not an interpretation btw. You mentioned feminists more than once. Do you think i'm a feminist for supporting abuse advocacy? lol. Anyhow, the study you cited is particularly weak considering many survivors were abused as children, well beyond 5 years in most cases. What was the median age of these respondents?
10. Have you had sexual acts (anal or oral intercourse or penetration by objects other than the penis) when you didn't want to because a man threatened or used some degree of physical force (twisting your arm, holding you down, etc.) to make you? "only 27 percent" of the women she counted as having been raped labeled themselves as rape victims.[10] 49 percent said it was "miscommunication," 14 percent said "crime but not rape," and 11 percent said they "don't feel victimized."[11]
"Koss also found that 42 percent of those she counted as rape victims went on to have sex with their attackers on a later occasion. For victims of attempted rape, the figure for subsequent sex with reported assailants was 35 percent. Koss is quick to point out that "it is not known if [the subsequent sex] was forced or voluntary"
Koss also found that 42 percent of those she counted as rape victims went on to have sex with their attackers on a later occasion. For victims of attempted rape, the figure for subsequent sex with reported assailants was 35 percent. Koss is quick to point out that "it is not known if [the subsequent sex] was forced or voluntary"
Google Researching the Rape Culture of America by Christina Hoff Sommers for more info.
So you don't think women have sex with men just to placate them? Let's assume we are all rational human beings and can differentiate between wanting to please a partner and a genuine threat of harm which is how everyone else in the world, but you of course, seems to understand what coercion is.
by the way, being 'persuaded' into sex isn't the definition of rape. The part you leave out though, which is hugely crucial, is "without the victims consent". Which makes your argument moot.
Right, raping men is ok, and should go unreported, because they're asking for it. But raping women is wrong and that is a crime... That's not really fair is it...
That's a bullshit response. Both men and women can be raped and neither are deserving of it. Maybe you can get your head out of Fox news and educate yourself before spreading more lies and making the issue even worse. What a cop out to dealing with an issue that exists. Overinflated? Don't you get the shame associated with this act. You can't even imagine the numbers of "real men" that have been abused and why would you. It's "not rape" because it's a dude. Bullshit.
What does Fox have to do with anything? I dont watch that garbage, i think of myself as a left leaning moderate.
Did i ever say that men could not be raped? NO. All i said is that they can handle it better than women. Which seems to be true because men hardly ever report their rapes....
Unfortunately the incidence of reporting or underreporting for that matter has nothing to do with which gender is better able to deal with sexual violence and everything to do with the acceptance of male victimization in our communities.
Actually you stated that if men are raped you find it hard to believe they are not enjoying it. So this applies to boys who are raped and sexually abused by their mothers?
And what are you basing your ridiculous statement on anyways? Men can HANDLE IT BETTER. Oh, I guess that explains why there are millions of men locked up in prisons because they could HANDLE IT BETTER right?
Men don't report rape because they are taught that they aren't allowed to be victims in this society.
In my first comment i said im talking about ADULTS. Children have nothing to do with what im talking about. What does this have to do with men in jail?
Now i assume something bad happend to you. Where you walking down a dark alley when you got jumped by a gange of women rapist? Get the hell over whatever happend to you. MEN HANDLE RAPE BETTER THAN WOMEN.
So you think that if you keep saying "men handle rape better than women" it somehow makes that statement true? What possible proof do you have to make such a ludicrous statement? Are you speaking from experience? Rape is TRAUMA and no, men don't handle trauma any better. They suffer the same effects. They can INTERNALIZE it better, but that's not DEALING with the trauma at all. Male suicide rates are much higher than women. Is that 'handling'it better?
Thank you for your video. I am a college student doing an internship about male survivors and I stumbled upon your video. As a male victim, I'm trying to make a male feel supported when he comes forward about his assault.
The fact remains that there is no one to talk to, no choice, no survival, just existence or at least an attempt at it. It was a secret for the 10 years I endured it and it remains a secret. Hiding remains the only path I know. Threats of retribution extended into my adulthood and against my first kid. Still there are no choices but to hide.
omg this is so sad. i hate that guys think they can't tell anyone just because they're guys. no one should have to be "tough" after being assaulted like this.
You know, I'm a girl, and I've been in several trauma in-patient facilities. And I've only ever met one man. Isn't it terrible, that men are "expected" to keep such things "secret"?
Is the stigma of males being abused and imasculated along with being looked down on AND suspected of passing on their abuses? I don't suppose there were also known abusers who sued the catholic church to become "wealthy" abusers. I can't understand why our society allows rapes to continue in the prison system as if part of their punishment. Even inocent or unrelated crimes of people sometimes end up in prison get raped.
This specific video is focused on male victimization. We do not focus on gender reference in terms of males or females as abuser. Our focus is to educate and shed light on the pandemic of abuse worldwide, as child abuse knows no boundaries of race, age, gender, socio economic status or spirituality.
(Wo)Men Speak Out is an organization dedicated to eradicating male/female violence against both genders. We seek to educate both men and women, cultivating healthy relationships and gender equity.
mega thanx for YOur inspiration... i am a former victim NOW thriver of multiple rape/abuse & fully breaking my silence in hopes of helping other victims... unifeid voices MUST win in this plague...
great video, retards need to realize that men can be victims too... i see 3 feminists watched this video too, the harm they do is sickening
011robyn 6 months ago
im a woman, i kept it secret and ended up with ptsd, i cant imagine how hard it is for men.... there are some twisted b*&%$#$s in this world! x
darrensgirl23 1 year ago
It is time to be free - Real Talk
WeKeepItRealTV 1 year ago
I myself am a survivor here in Australia.. Thankfully I found a support network. There are not many......tahn for your video.
lancemckellar 1 year ago
thanks my hope is for the success of your organization. there are many who need your support.
mjodat1 2 years ago
Keep up the great work.
MagicOfScottDietrich 2 years ago
This is beautiful, the media always talks about the rape and abuse of women, and as a brainwashed society, everyone omits that it can occur to males and when it is spoken of men and boys are often labeled "weak" and "feminine" and "liars."
SpirituallySexuallyP 2 years ago
Ignoring male victimization is dangerous and damaging -- I agree, but unfortunately male sexual abuse is taken as a joke in todays society. Not only women can be harassed. Men can be assailed too. Psychological damage in both cases can be fatal.
idontgiveashit0930 2 years ago
I ARE LOVE THIS
TheAustin95 2 years ago
i and my friend were sexually assaulted. my uncle sexually assaulted me, and is now in prison for pedophillia. my friend was raped by his dad. i saw him at a park and punched him right in the face.
crazyguy4949 2 years ago 3
that is good u r helping your friend i am sorry that had 2 happen 2 u and your friend i no how both of u fill
XxAngelgirlXx1 2 years ago
we get more of problem then a girl abused cause a girl can talk a boy is like a fag if he say something we should be MAN but we can not talk of what its hurt us
jejeroy 3 years ago
This is so sad! My heart goes out to all victims of rape and abuse. Just hold on. Be strong and things will get better.
blackso07 3 years ago 7
menthol5 3 years ago 3
rape is rape , it will hurt anyone
sonicheroe120 3 years ago 4
Neither touch NOR CUT male genitalia without the male's consent. Understand that, parents?
psandbergnz 3 years ago 4
men hardly talk about their rape experiences, b/c they're ashamed that someone violated them. its better to get that shit out in the open. sometimes, the thing you live with is the thing that kills you.
piscesariescusp121 3 years ago 2
I am glad to see that someone is finallly taking a stand for male victims of sexual abuse. Far too often when males are victimized, the very system that should protect them looks at them as criminals in the making, surely to be predators.
There is no reason for male victims to be treated as potential predators, any more than female victims would be treated as potential predators.
Thank you for giving a voice to all the men who have not found their own voice to speak out against male SXAB!~
hope4kidz 3 years ago 5
men can handle rape better than females. They should keep that shit quiet. And if its a female raping them i find it hard to believe that they are not enjoying it...
im NOT talking about children but grown men.
angelsgurl 3 years ago
uuuh NO. The ones that are rape are weak fragle. who ever is rape no matter how tough you are its the same !
altheawatts 3 years ago
silence doesn't mean rape was enjoyed, it just mean they can take it like a real tough man.
i agree with keeping that shit quiet, there's no point in humiliating themselves in public.
bnkrmike24 3 years ago
keeping it quiet is what keeps it going. not good advice at all. it's comments like these that perpetuates abuse. men do not deserve to be raped, no one does! if they are raped they should be able to come forward and talk about it without feeling like it's their fault. this video is awesome and there should be more so that people can talk about the real issue.
anchorinthestorm 3 years ago
Being forced, persuaded, coerced into sexual intercourse against your will is a definition of rape. Many guys after working a 60 hour week may not be in the mood for sex but can be coerced into it by wives and girlfriends rather than face the consequences. However, this is not classified as rape unless the opposite occurs! Hence marital rape etc.
Men can handle it better. They don't form themselves into feminist collectives and inflate stats to 1 in 4 and go around whining about it.
jbgood3 3 years ago
Talking someone whos not horny into sex is not rape. Whether your a male or female.
angelsgurl 3 years ago
angelsgirl "Talking someone whos not horny into sex is not rape. Whether your a male or female."
Your right but to some feminist researchers it is. See my reply to menspeakout or Google Researching the "Rape Culture" of America by Christina Hoff Sommers.
jbgood3 3 years ago
I disagree on your comment that statistics are inflated. 1 in 4 is an underestimate of the actual number involved. Sexual assault is one of the most under-reported crimes. Males being even less likely to report due to societal stigmas attached to being a victim.
menspeakout 3 years ago
Menspeakout Not really. The 1 in 4 stat came from a 1985 study by Mary Koss for Ms magazine. A yes to any of these q's was a + for rape. This survey has been disputed since then. 8. Have you had sexual intercourse when you didn't want to because a man gave you alcohol or drugs? 9. Have you had sexual intercourse when you didn't want to because a man threatened or used some degree of physical force (twisting your arm, holding you down, etc.) to make you?
jbgood3 3 years ago
The 1 in 4 stat has since been duplicated more than once. Google the ACE Study, which uses a pool of over 17,000 participants. Anybody whose taken a basic college stats class can look at a study and pick it apart. What we know about stats is that if they can be duplicated multiple times then it is our best indicator that they are accurate. There are other studies who reveal similar results using different menthods than you criticize here. They can't ALL be false,overbloated, and unreliable.
anchorinthestorm 3 years ago
Anchorinthestorm Studies show differing results depending on the questioning and interpretation of the answers. Here is another. "Loise Harris and Associates (1993) was commissioned by the Commonwealth Fund to do a study of women's health. Among the questions asked of its random sample population of 2,500 women was, "In the last five years, have you been a victim of a rape or sexual assault?" Two percent of the respondents said yes; 98 percent said no." Feminists wouldn't like this one!
jbgood3 3 years ago
I understand how stats work. My point is that the questioning has BEEN refined and varied if you see other studies cited by abuse experts, with similar findings. A 25% finding is not an interpretation btw. You mentioned feminists more than once. Do you think i'm a feminist for supporting abuse advocacy? lol. Anyhow, the study you cited is particularly weak considering many survivors were abused as children, well beyond 5 years in most cases. What was the median age of these respondents?
anchorinthestorm 3 years ago
10. Have you had sexual acts (anal or oral intercourse or penetration by objects other than the penis) when you didn't want to because a man threatened or used some degree of physical force (twisting your arm, holding you down, etc.) to make you? "only 27 percent" of the women she counted as having been raped labeled themselves as rape victims.[10] 49 percent said it was "miscommunication," 14 percent said "crime but not rape," and 11 percent said they "don't feel victimized."[11]
jbgood3 3 years ago
"Koss also found that 42 percent of those she counted as rape victims went on to have sex with their attackers on a later occasion. For victims of attempted rape, the figure for subsequent sex with reported assailants was 35 percent. Koss is quick to point out that "it is not known if [the subsequent sex] was forced or voluntary"
jbgood3 3 years ago
Koss also found that 42 percent of those she counted as rape victims went on to have sex with their attackers on a later occasion. For victims of attempted rape, the figure for subsequent sex with reported assailants was 35 percent. Koss is quick to point out that "it is not known if [the subsequent sex] was forced or voluntary"
Google Researching the Rape Culture of America by Christina Hoff Sommers for more info.
jbgood3 3 years ago
So you don't think women have sex with men just to placate them? Let's assume we are all rational human beings and can differentiate between wanting to please a partner and a genuine threat of harm which is how everyone else in the world, but you of course, seems to understand what coercion is.
by the way, being 'persuaded' into sex isn't the definition of rape. The part you leave out though, which is hugely crucial, is "without the victims consent". Which makes your argument moot.
anchorinthestorm 3 years ago
Right, raping men is ok, and should go unreported, because they're asking for it. But raping women is wrong and that is a crime... That's not really fair is it...
UndeadLight 3 years ago 2
That's a bullshit response. Both men and women can be raped and neither are deserving of it. Maybe you can get your head out of Fox news and educate yourself before spreading more lies and making the issue even worse. What a cop out to dealing with an issue that exists. Overinflated? Don't you get the shame associated with this act. You can't even imagine the numbers of "real men" that have been abused and why would you. It's "not rape" because it's a dude. Bullshit.
anchorinthestorm 3 years ago
What does Fox have to do with anything? I dont watch that garbage, i think of myself as a left leaning moderate.
Did i ever say that men could not be raped? NO. All i said is that they can handle it better than women. Which seems to be true because men hardly ever report their rapes....
angelsgurl 3 years ago
Unfortunately the incidence of reporting or underreporting for that matter has nothing to do with which gender is better able to deal with sexual violence and everything to do with the acceptance of male victimization in our communities.
menspeakout 3 years ago
Actually you stated that if men are raped you find it hard to believe they are not enjoying it. So this applies to boys who are raped and sexually abused by their mothers?
And what are you basing your ridiculous statement on anyways? Men can HANDLE IT BETTER. Oh, I guess that explains why there are millions of men locked up in prisons because they could HANDLE IT BETTER right?
Men don't report rape because they are taught that they aren't allowed to be victims in this society.
anchorinthestorm 3 years ago
In my first comment i said im talking about ADULTS. Children have nothing to do with what im talking about. What does this have to do with men in jail?
Now i assume something bad happend to you. Where you walking down a dark alley when you got jumped by a gange of women rapist? Get the hell over whatever happend to you. MEN HANDLE RAPE BETTER THAN WOMEN.
angelsgurl 3 years ago
So you think that if you keep saying "men handle rape better than women" it somehow makes that statement true? What possible proof do you have to make such a ludicrous statement? Are you speaking from experience? Rape is TRAUMA and no, men don't handle trauma any better. They suffer the same effects. They can INTERNALIZE it better, but that's not DEALING with the trauma at all. Male suicide rates are much higher than women. Is that 'handling'it better?
anchorinthestorm 3 years ago 3
I agree.
cjjaxxon 3 years ago
Not true. The end result is the same though. It'll affect their lives down the road no matter if they (men and women) report it or not.
cjjaxxon 3 years ago
Thank you for your video. I am a college student doing an internship about male survivors and I stumbled upon your video. As a male victim, I'm trying to make a male feel supported when he comes forward about his assault.
CPCoasterKing 3 years ago
thanks for telling me about men speak out, i was raped and molested for 3 years from 10 to 14, i thank you guys for being here to talk to.
pin1477 3 years ago
The fact remains that there is no one to talk to, no choice, no survival, just existence or at least an attempt at it. It was a secret for the 10 years I endured it and it remains a secret. Hiding remains the only path I know. Threats of retribution extended into my adulthood and against my first kid. Still there are no choices but to hide.
notsurviving 3 years ago
omg this is so sad. i hate that guys think they can't tell anyone just because they're guys. no one should have to be "tough" after being assaulted like this.
xbutiloveyoux 4 years ago
Thank you for the posting!!!
RonGA15 4 years ago
You know, I'm a girl, and I've been in several trauma in-patient facilities. And I've only ever met one man. Isn't it terrible, that men are "expected" to keep such things "secret"?
fiddler32 4 years ago 6
@fiddler32 We bloody well should'nt have to!
lancemckellar 9 months ago
Is the stigma of males being abused and imasculated along with being looked down on AND suspected of passing on their abuses? I don't suppose there were also known abusers who sued the catholic church to become "wealthy" abusers. I can't understand why our society allows rapes to continue in the prison system as if part of their punishment. Even inocent or unrelated crimes of people sometimes end up in prison get raped.
aleon1018 4 years ago
This specific video is focused on male victimization. We do not focus on gender reference in terms of males or females as abuser. Our focus is to educate and shed light on the pandemic of abuse worldwide, as child abuse knows no boundaries of race, age, gender, socio economic status or spirituality.
menspeakout 4 years ago
(Wo)Men Speak Out is an organization dedicated to eradicating male/female violence against both genders. We seek to educate both men and women, cultivating healthy relationships and gender equity.
Thank you for your comment.
menspeakout 4 years ago
Way to go! 5*
thebeigealert 4 years ago
Finally, some fair treatment of the issue!
thebeigealert 4 years ago
mega thanx for YOur inspiration... i am a former victim NOW thriver of multiple rape/abuse & fully breaking my silence in hopes of helping other victims... unifeid voices MUST win in this plague...
always dream~~~dare~~~dive, john :):):)
IrelandCladdagh 4 years ago
An amazing video with a great message. More people should check it out. Great website as well.
matnsas 4 years ago
yes, it's a shame. (lack of comments).
thanks so much for what you do!
PatPaulJ 4 years ago
Heck! The lack of comments after 2,464 views says it all!
I'm visiting the website now - thanks!
Force10Promotion 4 years ago