George Carlin's Amazing Tonight Show Performance

[TheCiCi2345]

He should've added, "I don't require anything I cannot acquire"

[johnnymexica]

He has jokes unlike leno.

[Ronpauli2012]

Dylan is Carlin's bitch!!

[SilverTrowel63]

Fucking genious!!

RIP

[kwdrm1]

Definitely one of George's all-time best bits. He went out on a high note.

[jojowopper]

how did he die ?

[robertchflynn]

@jojowopper he got old idiot!!

[jojowopper]

@robertchflynn thanx moron !!

[robertchflynn]

@jojowopper no problem dipshit!! You seem to need a lot of help with the obvious...

[Lashmush]

Motherfucking wordsmith.

[sickkat44]

anyone that doesnt like this is outta touch...he was so spot on with this, he spoke that fast to the audience and they didnt even realize he was commenting on and making fun of them!!!!

[oldsoftee]

I miss George sooooooooooooooooo much! RIP, wiseman!

[thatsexyman]

If you don't like George Carlin you are in denial of truth! Fuck you!

[airkooled05]

its ok , not that funny

[NormacHC]

@guyNbluejeans .... Fuck you

[thevmanvj]

Wow...

[CarrbearKidd]

If he rapped, I'd listen to him lol

[Delriversit]

Whether you agree with him or not, there can be little doubt regarding his linguistic virtuosity; and that's precisely the kind of thing he'd call pretentious drivel. Only he'd say it better.

[ROCKORPHAN]

A one of a kind.

[johnboy400]

@guyNbluejeans you are a fucking idiot

[guyNbluejeans]

Oh what a genius this guy is! Oh he's just so funny! Oh isn't he amazing! Wow, what a super genius this turd was! Wow, can anyone top this amazing piece of shit or what?! gaeorge carline is just so amzzing i must go and buy all his tapes because he's just unlike anyone else! Wow, what a turd! He just knows so much he has such profound insights into the world and people everything that's going on! Wow, wow, wow, wow who could ever be as great as this worthless overrated piece of shit!!!!!!

[IR17171717]

@guyNbluejeans given how you like sarcasm i'll put my comment sarcastically. ahem. if you don't like george carlin, go on his videos.  now...take some time to process this and respond if you want. but remember. i'm being sarcastic...like you...see...clever

[YcantWeAllGetAbong]

@guyNbluejeans What have you accomplished that gives you the right to belittle such a great man?

[MindCrafting420]

@guyNbluejeans you are either a troll or fucking stupid.. idc which one, but you are failure as a human.

[Kulizokia]

@guyNbluejeans

umad?

[shangrila628]

@guyNbluejeans You are clearly a hillbilly moron who is too dumb to understand a man of wisdom like Carlin. GTFO, this is definitely not a place for you.

[guyNbluejeans]

Look how people in the so-called mainstream media give validation to this putrid scum carlin.

[JokerzKard]

Few can match my appreciation for this man......

[MrCassavius]

thats one of the best things Ive seen in my 38 years of life, thanks to the uploader. Diogenes for the modern life

[javelin1010]

Amen George. RIP.

[MrAlsfan5]

Typical Carlin-brilliant.

[johnfm1061]

One of the greatest comics ever.

[thekerneljames]

Fucking Genius!

[trier4952]

This is the most fucked up game of "What Am I?" I have ever played!!

[0rezinlv]

Completely inarguable; he was the greatest philosopher/comedian/Social Satirist of our time. The mean IQ of the country lost a couple points when he died. Joe bless you George, Joe bless you...

[marshall2411]

@0rezinlv he is a genius. I could never do what he just did

[hidday]

WOW



[frank47hammer]

Carlin showed how degraded the English language has become in the computer and consumer age.

[JohnNiemsMusic]

"I have a LOVE child who sends me HATE mail!" This could be GC'S best routine ever!

[catstalker1]

babble babble babble babble babble, etc etc and more babble babble and babble

[MrSoakitincider]

mix? Idiot. Create your own........

[TheNuncFluens]

someone should mix this.

[Mr70sFunk]

@TheNuncFluens Someone has already mixed this.

watch?v=a3asbkY0tTE

[youpumpertube]

THE magnificent George!

[UMMD1]

he was the greatest ever for sure!!

[2hip24u]

Because Jay Leno is just plain dumb.

[UMMD1]

@2hip24u exactly Jay's a fuckin idiot he doesnt even come close to George at all

[TCWpower]

a lot to remember for sure

[BikiniDeathSquad]

every cliche phrase and modern politically correct word! really brilliant!

[MultiMrMuffinman]

can anyone beat this ! i don't think so

GC was the man

[jammer7221]

This guy was amazing so real

[12cowwoman]

lol, sounds like he's selling himself! if this was an ad at a single website - oh mine, the girls would line up, and the women....

[NorrinRadd77]

Eminem is George Carlin's BITCH!

[Dreamichigo1]

@NorrinRadd77 They're both my idols

[MrROTD]

How did he remember all that? LOL

[thegreatbungholio21]

@MrROTD No kidding! My head is spinning just having listened to him rap all of that....

[JFreedom28]

BEST. RAP. EVER.

[SteveSparx]

best

[sergioosorio729]

Add this,

Mt Eden Dubstep - Sierra Leone

You will thank me later!

[teejate]

I like smart people.

[jaho101]

legend



[takforalt]

Flawless and flat-out funny.

[SuperFirewire1]

So, i guess he is saying he likes frank zappa?

[SkateSka]

@SuperFirewire1 He probably did like him, he definitely must've liked the Jesus Thinks You're a Jerk song.

[juggernaut866]

This should be put to a beat...

[CommonSense0695]

In Other Words, Mr Carlin is Connected.

[DavePlaysTrombone]

flub free, baby. the greatest.

[SCPF]

This is fucking crazy!

[emadhatter]

Just PURE GENIUS

[sevasnon]

Absolutely the comedian for the times. It says nothing and says it all.

[jackstorm777]

George Carlin on Jay Leno. It's like a glorious shining rainbow over a field of shit.

[milkywaycenter]

@jackstorm777 Agreed Leno the Shit King...I'm going to retire 10 more tens and screw as many people in the process.

[UMMD1]

jay leno is a fuckin loser

[Kwyjibo2006]

The funniest thing about this skit is that, for all the terms he uses in this routine, he isn't saying a fucking thing.

God, George was the greatest.

[Graygeor]

One of my all-time favorites. (Along with the seven deadly words)

[CletisVanDam1]

He did this whole routine without notes or a teleprompter! Look at his eyes, he's looking at the audience, not reading. WOW! Somebody should count the words that the man memorized @ 70 plus years of age. Not to mention how good the writing is. I miss the man.

[atheist382]

Awesome!

[redreaper2020]

George Carlin could rap? WTF?

[bodhisattva71]

Leno lives on while George Carlin and Patrice O'Neal are dead,fuck leno.

[WeAskThePeople]

genius.. love it.

[DELREBEL]

THIS MAN WAS A GENIUS THERE'S NO WAY IN HELL ID REMEMBER ALL THAT, LET ALONE REPEAT IT WITHOUT FALLIN FLAT ON MY FACE RIP GEORGE UR MISSED

[heiden6]

Like a boss.

[F1aw1ess11]

R.I.P

[VitalSigns1]

I'm going to use this in a job interview.

[DankulousTV]

I wonder if he wrote that or not, probably got some help on it, because that was fuckin raw !! He just dropped more knowledge in about three n a half minutes than any mainstream rapper's whole career

[dropjawbertone]

@DankulousTV George was proud of the fact that he always wrote all of his own material on his own and made mention of it many times. This was one of his best bits for sure.

[DankulousTV]

@dropjawbertone Thanks for that! I really enjoy George's work, and as an MC this blew me away. Amazing wordplay!

[Bawbster1]

Shit, Piss, Fuck, Cunt, Cocksucker, Motherfucker, and Tits.

[dcs290]

@Bawbster1 you forgot turd and twat

[Bawbster1]

@dcs290 No I didn't... Shit = Turd & Cunt = Twat. I listed Mr. Carlin's list of the 7 dirty words you can't say on TV, in order.

[ThiefLeet]

@Bawbster1 Fart, Turd and Twat.

[TheMorrbyd]

@Bawbster1 fart, turd, and twat.

and rememeber, it's okay to "prick" your finger, just don't "finger" your prick. XD

R.I.P. George Carlin

[DerekWilliamsMusic]

Genius!

[SPmQQse]

the origional rapper...r.i.p.

[yestodedondesalio]

This is AMAZING. He was the BEST, hands down.

[goldiejames]

@thealphamale73 Well thanks for re-posting after your account was unduly suspended,cheers for keeping Georges talent known and alive!

[jameshalterman]

working rage-aholic always cracks me up, lol.

[melowar78]

miss this man :(

[TurkiyeCumhurbaskani]

this is masterpiece

[mgalore]

Imagine what it took to put this routine together just to remember it all to compile all the catch phrases ..and then to deliver them  GENIUS

[c0n5um1n973ff43y]

@c0n5um1n973ff43y the audience fucked up

[gfresta]

genius

[yipster0290]

From his Book, "When will Jesus Bring the Porkchops"

[tiberiius]

someone should autotune this performance!

[Raymondo30837]

George was the real man who never made it to the Presidency. What a very great pity! A genious lost for ever!

We are stuck with political hacks in the pockets of thier "owners".

"Democracy", I shit it daily

[futurebooker]

holy shit... just.... holy shit.... I'm speechless.

[britturk123]

One word "WOW".

[HanzSygnal]

I REMEMBER THIS---JAY WAS SPELLBOUND AFTERWARDS

[dante87ish]

The lack of reactions was caused by Jay Leno. He dumbed down the audience earlier that night.

[AssailantLF]

@dante87ish What lack of reactions? They applauded in between verses and were respectfully quiet while he was speaking.

[babylonkid]

That was great

[nypad5]

no way he did his modern man opening on the tonight show? holy hell this is amazing!

[HWMeatcutter]

That is just amazing!!!

[UGENATION]

His a genius. I watched his bit on Hair GOT DAMN he was good. I waiting for REMIX (by DJ whateverhewantstocallhimself )

[nooyawkfun]

Superb!

[j11430]

George Carlin is the only man in human history that can successfully pull off the balding ponytail look

[creaturebotman]

SOMEONE. WANT TO GET FAMOUS!

PUT THIS CLIP TO AUTOTUNE AND MUSIC



[hippoet]

No one is going to auto tune this? Really?

[playerdepimp]

so what exactly is he??? too many things!!!

[paulgad]

This guy is the most underrated sand up act of all time. The greatest. RIP

[stagm3]

@paulgad  he wasn't underrated, he's well known and loved, wtf are you talking about?

[paulgad]

@stagm3 I know, the younger people like him. I am 43 and love him, however, the3re are many people in my circle of people who just finds nhim offensive, and did he have to swear so much kinde of thing. The older generation, his generation, did not find him so funny.. He should be a houshold role model. He taught you to think and laugh!!! Who else did this, all by himself. I can not stand the haters.

[trooperjoe73]

Funny that there is a comedian in his shadow as he does his routine! What I loved about GC was his love of language.

[alandschmidt]

holy shit

[SmallRubberFeet]

Reminds me a bit of Penn Jilette + Robin Williams

[greg313662]

Holeee fucken shiiiit. Some humans throughout time have amazed and mesmerized us from time to time but......WOW.

Thank you soooooo much Rufus.

[SKIPINTRO9]

Come back George, we need you!

[dimpsey3]

@SKIPINTRO9 he will never be back.Not where he's at now..and all he has to do is ask Religion

[proyectodepeleador]

LEYEND

[ShawnandStefan]

Legend!

[zao144]

haha one of his best bits

[DanialLeonardYoung]

...Where is the remix?

[artinmey]

You fucking genius George.

[aosseily]

The Best!!!

[Mar2623]

what a memory

[hillsonn]

Yabai-----



[plancknplant]

stunning, just stunning

[MrShadowz1337]

man I miss him....

[darkridr25]

LOL one of my favorite clips! Thanks for (re)posting. :D

[777nirgal]

1. I am Carlin, your teacher. You shall have no other teachers before me. Amen!

[911ShikoX]

i love this man i hope more ppl would learn from him R.I.P 4ever..

[0wnedpur3str]

@911ShikoX Go listen to Carlin talk about death, he'd make you feel stupid for saying he should rest in peace.

[JDRMMR]

I'M A MODERN MAN A MAN FOR THE MILLENIUM DIGITAL AND SMOKE FREE A DIVERSIFIED MULICULTURAL POST MODERN DECONSTRUCTIONIST POLITICALLY,ANATOMICALLY, AND ECOLOGICALLY INCORRECT I BEEN UP LATE DOWNLOADED I BEEN INPUTTED AND OUTSOURCED I KNOW THE UPSIDE OF DOWNSIZING I KNOW THE DOWNSIDE OF UPGRADING I'M A HIGH TECH LOW LIFE A CUTTING EDGE STATE OF THE ART BICOASTAL MULTI TASKER AND I CAN GIVE YOU A GIGABYTE IN A NANO SECOND

[Rush1013]

@JDRMMR

yep we all watched the video to.

[0wnedpur3str]

@JDRMMR /watch?v=hkCR-w3AYOE&list=LLEV­AxQ8vnmYCWy3tEJWlyAg&index=36&­feature=plpp_video

[epicnessism101]

i think a tomahawk low-level flying cruise missile would fit most of this....

[abeedakbar]

Eminem was NOT the first successful white rapper.

[dfbhcf]

@abeedakbar True, the Beastie Boys were.

[BloodFalcon001]

@abeedakbar He was the first GOOD successful white rapper

[abeedakbar]

@BloodFalcon001 true

[blahblahblahman]

@abeedakbar

Vanilla Ice was "successful"? I thought he was a one hit wonder joke.

[euroman32589]

@abeedakbar ..lol. so true.

[buzolibre]

His routine on religion was perhaps the best stand up of the century. But he loves you..............

[PaytonFu]

@buzolibre Still managed to get his atheism in during this bit, a man of genius

[darkw0rldburden]

@buzolibre i agree i laughed so hard when he said that lol

[schroederb2007]

oxymoronic cliches? haha perfected!

[RzzRBladez]

we will still be getting OWNED by this man for the next few decades, from time to time we will think: Didnt Carlin say that?

[jiggle17]

HOLY SHIT! The puts ANY rapper/lyricist to shame... have to watch it several times to comprehend everything!

[getalife67]

he told the truth about everything he said.

[mojorising0071950]

I frickin love George Carlin, funny guy, astute observer of everything

[bornagainsaint1]

how does he remember all that stuff LOL!

[karlakor]

@bornagainsaint1 I'm also amazed that George Carlin could remember all that, but there is a musical cadence and rhythm to it from beginning to end, and that surely must help the memorization.

[42kimberq]

I miss him soooooo.

[TheKingofBastards]

I like the customary "okay?!" during the bow.