I have most "symptoms" but I dont think of it as a "disorder" its more like reality. I cant count how many times my gut and "paranoia" told me someone was trying to screw me...everyone else would have said I had this disorder.
Turns out they were trying to screw me. These "symptoms" you list dont come from out of nowhere, they are born in reality and then you use those experiences to judge future experiences, nothing worng with that. Better safe than sorry.
Holds everything in. Looks after own welfare. So focused on self that gossip about other's doesn't even seem to matter. Feels like a misfit yet strikes out if angered. Thinks everyone is looking at them. Holds a grudge and doesn't seem to need much human contact. This person takes their job or tasks very serious and they freak out very easily. Can anyone tell me what is wrong with this person? Been like this all their life but getting worse.
I know someone that is kind of like that. This person I know argues even when you are not arguing back, says some of the meanest things and then apologizes later yet will do it again and again and never stops. This person has lack of care for others, takes everything serious, hard to make a decision, gets mad at the drop of a hat and will tear you apart. Does not sugar coat anything. Reacts without thinking. Does things and blames them on other's. Can't handle being wrong.
Just found out that I have this... I'm devastated, I don't know what's real and what's not anymore. For a long time I just thought I was clever and was good at catching people out and working out their deceptions... now I realise it was the PPD talking. Thankyou for making this video, hopefully I can use it to help people understand what's wrong with me, because so far it seems like they can't grasp the severity of it.
Oh man, I think the guy that I'm talking to is doing the same thing. Every time I don't reply in a certain amount of time, he'll ask who else I'm talking to and I'm like wth? It's getting to the point where he thinks that I'm everybody on here. It's annoying and makes me not want to talk to him. My grandmother has paranoia but it's different. She thinks everyone is stealing her stuff and she locks everything up. But my boyfriend is different. He thinks I'm cheating all the time. It breaks my <3
Hey man, i suffer from this aswell, But i think i kinow the reason for my behavior. My mother was a liar, a cheater, and just about everything else. So, because i grew up around that my whole life, i tend to bring that into my realationship. its sucks man i know and im glad that i have found someone that can accept me for me. Keep your head up. God will find the perfect someone for you if he dosent help you change first!! :)
Steve, the fact you are aware of your problem is fantastic! Know your 'enemy' to be able to fight it :-) You made this video in 2009, so I think you do feel better by now. In my family I've a person who thinks to be the only normal person between monsters with only very bad intentions (I'm one of those) so for that person I can't see a solution. My family is suffering a lot by it. My parents always agreed in all she says because they are afraid of her aggressive reactions & to hurt her feelings.
Thank you for making this video. I hope you don;t mind but I used it for a college class called abnormal psycholoogy. My project was on personality disorders. I felt this was a perfect video to show what someone with PPD goes through and how they feel :) Hope things are better for you.
This is a beautifully honest video. I'm on the receiving end of PPD. It really isn't a nice place to be. My question is this: What's the best way to protect yourself against the wrongful allegations that someone with PPD can make about you? There comes a point where enough is enough. However, I am striving to be sensitive. Are there any ways to break through the wrongful mindset of someone with PPD?
A few years back i was diagnosed with 'a' personality disorder, after watching a few videos about ppd including this i thought "oh shit, it makes so much sense now". I've lost a most of my friends due to my actions and dilutions and find it very hard to even explain to them what goes on in my head. I wish i could change the way i think, it's ended up with me barley able to leave the house it gets that bad. But thank you so much for posting this video and i hope everyone going well for you J.D.C
This video brings me to tears every time i watch it. I commented on it around 2 yrs ago hopin i'd find a way to make my bf realize that it's just his PPD that's affecting his thoughts. I completely understand how hard it must be to admit havin ppd, i have literally forgiven endless bruises he has caused me cuz in the end i know his thoughts get to him. I've supported him in every way possible but he always turns around n says i'm so good at hidin things n must be lyin :( what more can i do??
i have this and my stomach would just urge and all this though explode in my brain like oh they don't like me i just keep filling my brain with bullshit...I need help!!! how do you cope with it...
I understand, I have it too. It's hard for me to get over the way people made fun of me and insulted me a long time ago, and that I try to stay happy, but it's just that I just want to be normal for a change.
I have Borderline Personality Disorder and have been in a relationship with someone for nearly three years (though we are more off than on) and I suspect now that he has PPD. I realise my infidelity (promiscuity) has not helped the situation but until I did a course on Personality Disorder (KUF) I seemed to forget it wasn't all just borderlines in the world... I realise now I barely knew him atall. I want to help. Thanks for sharing, I am so sorry for your pain. I never realised..... xx
I think I have this. But I think people who are affected by this can consciously counter fight this way of thinking,and just stop it. I am now trying to think positive,and not doubt so much in my gf. Its just wrong pattern of thinking,you can correct it yourself,or else it may harm your personal life quite a lot. Good luck.
i know some body like this , he is a bad bastard he would never think any thing was wrong with him is is always somebody else fault persistant lier i could go on but it makes me angry
hey steve. i have really been researching paranoid schizophrenia and paranoid personality disorder and i understand you all. thanks for making this video and i hope you find someone who can really accept you and understand you. best wishes.
@Gneuhhh My heart goes for you, my mom has the disorder too..and the best thing is to set boundaries with a lot of love and treat them with dignity..no one else does..but we do know because we care..
This video made me cry, because I read every sentence and thought, "This is a perfect description of me!". I've been wondering about disorders like this for some time now, because I am one messed up Mofo! I knocked myself unconscious once just so I would stop worrying about my Girlfriend and where she was because she wasn't replying to my text. I hope you have a great marriage Steve, and Thanks for making this really insightful video! I finally have an explanation to my insanity :)
Thank you for making this video, I can't imagine how hard it must have been for you. I went to see a school psychiatrist a couple of weeks ago because I was feeling depressed but didn't trust her so I didn't open up at all. Now Im starting to realise things like the symptoms you mentioned and as much as I want to deny it I think that may be whats causing my depression, thank you for helping me realise that.
I feel the same way, but I don't think it's a mental disorder. I don't think the world is out to get me, but I know most people are selfish scumbags. Every friend I've ever had has stabbed me in the back. What I do now is not take people seriously anymore. They're all just temporary.
Steve- Thanks for sharing. My wife & I have a 26 year old son who has PPD. He refuses to take mediciation because of who knows why. We were wondering if you are on any type of meds and if so what and is it helping you deal with PPD? Your video is a lot what we think he is going through. God Bless, Waz
Thank you for this video, too often people don't understand how I think, why I think that way or why I am alone. It hurts everyday. Seems like nothing can help. It's slightly comforting I am not alone.
thanks a lot for this video. my wife is going through the same thing, and i used to get angry at her all the time for acting this way and pretty much sabotaging all her relationships, but when i discovered that she had an actual disorder, it helps me understand her and lessens my anger. Now I will break my back trying to help her as much as i can. i love her to death and will do anything i can to help her. i'll go to hell and back for her.
i go through that and i made a web page up with the way i think and people are mean to people like us because they dont understand me the vid was proudly done
whenever a paranoid thought pops up, just avoid thinking about. The very second it enters your mind, take a deep breath and think about something else. Its really hard at first, but it gets easier and easier the more you do it. After a short time, the delusion will just be gone, or at least easy to dismiss. This helped me alot
Hi Steve.. nice video. have you seeked help like individual or supportive psychotherapy ? this can help.. you can see a psychologist. If you have too much anxiety, you might need to see a psychiatrist too.
Steve I am honestly really sorry for your condition. Life must seem like hell when you cant trust anyone. The times we live in dont help either. People have lost some of their humanity trying to get rich at all costs. We are all getting mistrustful. But what I do to try to judge a situation is how I would behave myself. For example sometimes I avoid calls of friends because I am tired or busy but I do love them and value them. I would be there for them. So I do not mind if they do the same to me
Oh my god.. I actually cried at the end. I am so relieved. Thank you so much for the two examples. Now I finally know what's "wrong" with me. Thank you, Steve. Thank you.
Thank you for making this video. I too have PPD from past experiences and I feel as if it's ruining and going to continue ruining my life. I am engaged and fear because of it he's going to leave me. I try so hard to control it but it just doesn't work. Thank you again for making this video.
you are very talented Steve..it`s obvious your poured every ounce of pain into your creation...I would say almost all creativity stems from pain..pain is a great motivator...
this is no disorder.....ppl r deceitful, fraudulent, selfish and just plain evil....without getting too detailed about it, its these ppl who make up society and thus label "being aware" and being able to c thru there "moral/humane" disguises as PPD....ppl who r diagnosed with PPD r pure souls who r fed up with the bs everyone else indulges to get somewhere in life
@incitetalife one more thing....ur prolly right...if ppl dont return ur text in a day or so, then tell u they left there phone in the car or the phone was off, more than likely they r giving u an excuse....so ur not being paranoid about the read on the situation....its just that "normal" ppl r insensitive and don't le it bother them
So sorry about your disorder Steve. Trust me, I know it is NO JOKE. My mother was diagnoised with M.S. a few years ago and on rare occasions, some M.S. patients will get paranoia on the side and my mom was one of them. It sort of comes and goes though. She'll be good for a while and then maybe weeks later, she's accusing me of something as random as throwing something of her's in the trash or moving herthings around. I need to help her to remember to mention the paranoia to her doctor.
Steve, I am so grateful to you for putting this video up. I am sorry it hurt, and I wish there were more people who respond with understanding and compassion. I am here if you ever need anything.
I also saw the comment you left recently about being engaged!! I dont know you, but Im extremely happy for you.
That video was exactly everything I feel and have to deal with. Im coming to terms with the way i think now but it really does ruin my life, I cant trust anyone I know and the slightest thing could make me turn against someone and just cut them out of my life. Was nice to hear ur story and to know Im not alone tho :) Hope ur doing ok xxx
Such a sad disorder and it pains me to have gone through a similar situation with paranoia...my ex boyfriend was paranoid about many things and was constantly accusing me of cheating and contracting a disease and giving it to him...he harbored over my past and could not move forward...it hurt me to see him not trust me...not only did he suffer, but I suffered as well...I still love him and miss him...hope he is well...what can someone do to comfort or put their mind at ease? How can they trust?
@MyDestroyedPsyche ....i don't think its fair t blame it on your ex-boyfriend....sounds like u prolly slept around in the past (whether it be in relationships or casual).....which justifies his lack of trust....once u give it up u have nothing to give.....bottom line is no guy wants to buy a used car at new car prices...i think its gr8 u were promiscuous.....i say dont deny ur inner slut and continue banging......ur life will alwayz be defined by disastrous relationships so dont try
Awesome video! My husband has PPD, and there are people who are willing to live with this. I did not CHOSE to love him, I believe I was CHOSEN. And you are very brave to even admit that you have this disease. That is a huge huge statement of who you are.
OMG example2 is me! If someone dsn't text me back straight away i assume they don't wanna talk to me, and if they don't txt after an hour i'm like"that's it! I should stop trying to be friends with that person clearly he/she doesn't wanna be friends with me" except that once they do txt i kinda forgive them and forget about it,, also for instance if a person on fb keeps sending me messages instead of posting on my wall i start thinking that he/she finds talking to me embarrassing..
I thought it was just me and I was going crazy, I just can't cope anymore I suffer panic/anxiety attacks aswell and it's scary. I live in constant fear all the time.
@pierneus UM? I'm dont understanding where you're getting at are you claiming PPD to not be much of a disorder? Forgive me if I'm wrong, but it's very serious. I have to face the other way in bed because I think it will somehow protect me from an airplane that I'm certain will crash into my house. When someone hits even a little bump in the road I always think they're planning to kill me in a car accident. I even think my baby sister is conspiring against the family.
Im 17 and i've recently met a girl and i love her so much but i hate the way i think of her sometimes ( being suspicious and all ) because she doesn't text me back. And yet her excuse is that her battery died. And it gets even worse when i see her talking with other guys. ( Even when i know she loves me and she wouldn't cheat on me but on the other side i still think she might not like me anymore and that she might wants someone else )
I've got all of the above, so what? I'm just fully aware that people cannot be trusted in general. I always give them a chance, but with suspicion. This attitude has actually helped me to achieve a better life. It's better to be realistic than deluded and believe that people are good and trustworthy. Just look at the what the government really does to all of us instead of blindly believing that they protect our best interests (just one example). I like the video and the music, by the way! :)
@pierneus Oh so you mean that being suspicious isn't a bad thing? well normally it isn't but when its severe then you've got a problem, that's the point of this.
Hey Steve...how are you doing? I totally love this video and i thank you for it. Coming froma Mexican household they don't understand this disorder i have. This video helped them understand. I am VERY paranoid of people and specificly men. I have an intense fear of opening up and sharing my entire being with men. Your two example at the end were accurate to what i go through. Thank you thank you thank you for bringing awareness to this. I was beginning to think i was crazy and the only one.
@ActsofGoths10 Heya, I am doing good. Actually got engaged now. Found someone that totally understands :D Still find it hard to trust and need to know where they are all the time, but this has felt the easiest.
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Those examples were piss poor. Most of the time when people don't respond to texts or calls and say they left their phone is the car, or it was dead, they ARE lying and WERE choosing to ignore you. haha. please give better examples. those are examples of something that people do to eachother all the time. it doesnt neccisarilly mean they hate you. i ignore friends and my gf's calls all the time, as they do to me. we're just busy or dont wanna talk. who cares. go eat some more sad muffins. tryagn
@stevietrixta Dont worry Steve, this person is what we call a Troll. He elevates his own self esteem by being hypercritical of those around him and constantly seeks attention to validate his own inflated ego. These individuals often suffer from a cognitive bias known as the Dunning-Kruger effect in which they believe that they are far more knowledgeable and intuitive than they actually are. This is why this individual is insistent while demonstrating that he lacks any understanding of the topic
@stevietrixta hey steve i suffer from the same disorder ,,its hard for people to understand us but its ok we don't have to be sorry its not like we want to be like this i come across as an asshole sometimes and it hurts me because i think im a nice guy but i cant help it my gf suffers with me i tell her lets break up cuz i don't want u to suffer but she wont leave lol just be strong man there is a lot of people out there who suffer ,,,its ok at least i think its ok to suffer .
@wonhundredtruth The phone thing was a fine example. It was only an hour or two, and he started feeling it at 5 minutes. Some people aren't glued to their phones, ready to reply instantly. Some do reply, when they get around to it, because they don't think the text is urgent. There are lots of reasons. The first of all the possible explanations that he thinks of is they don't want to talk to him. That's a paranoid way of thinking.
@wonhundredtruth "those are examples of something that people do to eachother all the time. it doesnt neccisarilly mean they hate you." Exactly. That's why the examples are so good. He interprets things like that as being hated. That's how paranoia works. They could mean a lot of things, but look which explanation he chooses. He's trying to show how unreasonably he thinks.
@wonhundredtruth wow, i know this is a late response. but the problem he's explaining is that someone with the disorder will believe that the ONLY conclusion is that they were being ignored. to the person suffer from this disorder, there is NO OTHER REASON. they can't even accept that it's a POSSIBILITY that what the person said was true. so, yes, it's still a perfectly fine example.
@wonhundredtruth : that's what he's trying to explain to people. while that is a common occurence, the way a person with PPD reacts to that situation is different. You know they may have been busy or didn't feel like talking. They automatically think the person hates them.
@wonhundredtruth : that's what he's trying to explain to people. while that is a common occurence, the way a person with PPD reacts to that situation is different. You know they may have been busy or didn't feel like talking. They automatically think the person hates them.
Hi stevie.How r you now? Can i ask? Did you consult a doctor? How did you know your suffering from this disorder? I'm interested to know more about this. I've just met a friend recently, and your examples in the video really fit for her. I think she has ppd too..
I have been diagnosed with this, and as difficult as it is to deal with, the diagnosis made a big difference to me. I have always be introspective, so knowing means I can challenge my thoughts once I have, like you, given myself a few days to get over my initial thoughts. I need a couple of days... and then i can try to put things into perspective. It's hard though, I often feel ashamed, or lonely, or angry, or lost.
i think i have a li'l bit of this, as i grow older i am starting to lose trust in some of my frends, i always think that they are trying to use me, sometimes the smallest insluts hurt me afterwards, although im regarded as a funny guy and all of the people i know dont really h8 me. on the bright side its nice to know its just something in your mind and ppl dont actually think of you this way.
extreme parinioa(i search public restrooms when i go in them and my bedroom before i can feel even 2% less pariniod)
i don't trust any1 because i think that they r plotting something against me
i'm loosing touch with reality(my life is starting to feel like i'm the star of the truman show)
i hate alot of attention,if there's 2 other people in the room and they r just looking at me i get pariniod as fuck,i hold grudges for a very long time
@amazingaustin13 That doesn't sound like paranoid personality disorder at all. Schizotypal personality disorder, maybe. Psychotic delusions, maybe. Someone with PPD might suspect others (specific real people they have met, like friends, not people who might not even exist/ boogie men) of spreading rumors, manipulating, secretly hating them, infidelity - plausible things. Not plotting something or hiding in your bedroom. (Are you serious?)
This was so powerful. I really hope that you find contentment, happiness and stability soon. And I'm not just saying that - I feel a lot of the things that you described, and it's a suffocating kind of existence to not trust anyone even when you want to. I can only hope that things will improve for you. And send you lots of e-hugs. x
I want to say that I have a father that has this same disorder. I feel your pain because I feel his. Please keep your head up. No matter what it isn't worth giving up. Life is so hard for all of us and I hope that you look at the things that make you smile, that make you laugh.
@stevietrixta hey. you WONT be single forever. you find someone who loves you and can see past the PPD. you find someone that recognizes your symptoms and knows exactly how to calm you down or cheer you up. i did. i didnt think it was possible but it is. and i do still have psychotic breaks but im getting better. it WILL get better. and thank you for this video. i love moby btw
Thank you for uploading this. I find myself feeling this way, thinking I am going out of my mind, unsure how to explain it to others. I have not been diagnosed with PPD but I am going to talk with my doctor about it. I do not feel normal and need to find the appropriate help to manage this. Be strong.
Well for one thing, you're correct to be suspicious of others, especially a girlfriend, because it's rare that one is actually trustworthy.. Call me paranoid too, I don't care, but I've remained single for the same reasons.
For The Past Few Years, Ive Been Having These Symptoms, Ive Been Telling My Self To Change But I Simply Couldn't. I Came Across This Disorder Today, And This Video. I Realised About An Hour Ago That I Have This Disorder After Researching My Symptoms, Im Somewhat Happy To Know That Its This Disorder, And Not Me In Genral. Thank You So Much For Posting This Video, And Making Me Realise What My Disorder Is About. Thank You So Much.
@GunsMurder PPD is a PERSONALITY disorder. Personality IS who you are. It's not like a flu that's a virus that enters your body and makes you sick when you would normally be healthy. It's more of a maladaptive lifestyle. Just because you know the name doesn't explain anything or mean it's not you. All the name/diagnosis does is make it easier to talk about and think about so you can try to do something about it.
I always stop talking to people i know due these feelings and after a long time they'll be like whats happening to me, why dont i talk to them anymore, when they try to contact me again proves me that they dont really hate me, it was just me :(
Steve, try not to worry about all of this, i was just the same, the examples you said i was exactly the same way, eventually i actually found the girl im with now, ive been with her for over a year and 4 months now and everything is perfect, she has obviously changed over the time as have I, and I believe that one day you shall find someone like that too, that will change for you, and that you could possibly change for, what im trying to say is, just try be as happy as you can be until that day
I feel so sad for you. You were very brave to post this video even though it hurt you to do so. My brother suffers from this and last year he attempted suicide by shooting himself in the chest. He became this way from being raised by my abusive father and permissive mother. He won't believe that he is paranoid and he gets angry whenever we point out that people did not do the things he is accusing them of. He also has grandiose plans to invent things that will solve the world's fuel crisus.
I have been living exactly the way you did. I didn't know I have PPD until last year but I refused to acknowledge I have it and have not seeked any help. I am having a relationship currently and he just proposed to me. At the same time its getting very tensed between us. As we try to start planning on the wedding, the suspicion and insecurity is building up so much. I don't think he can put up with me forever. I will be ruining his life if I choose to marry him right?
dont ever feel bad for being cautious it can actually save you from a lot of people who prey on the ones who are too trusting! the key is to be somewhere in the middle. Its ok to trust but one should never let their guard down 100%! find a balance i think thats the key!
Another thing is constantly picking apart what people do and say, to confirm your conviction that they're using you. When I tell people about my reasons for breaking up with someone, it always seems absurd to them, when it was so rational to me. And all the while, I do it just to avoid getting hurt or being perceived as pathetic.
found out a day ago my paps has this he thinks the're cameras in the tv so he pulls me into the bathroom to talk to me everytime, he thinks my mom poisns his food, he thinks my moms cheating but then he says i know she can never do something like that?? wtf so contradictory it's dreadfull because at the end of the day its not his fault
Steve I felt your pain through that video ...try to remember one thing ...we 'all' have something we wish we could change about ourselves...we may not live with these thoughts everyday but you have educated us about how some have to live with it. Thank you ...you may have PPD but you have very special qualities. All the best with your journey x
I destroyed my marriage and following relationships because of this. Now I am not going to bother with finding another partner because I know it will just turn out the same way as the last one. I wont trust her, she will try to earn my trust and I will just fucking destroy her. I'm over it, it's better for me and other people if I just live by myself. It sucks though.
this video is incredible, it shows excatly how i feel on a day to day basis, and i am going to use it to show family/friends how my head works in the hope they will better understand me. THANK-YOU
for all these years i couldnt figure it out but now its clear to me...i have ppd. all these years of stressing and getting depressed over nothing. i mean, i always tell myself its nothing.
Oh my gosh... I had no idea anything like this even existed.... My heart really goes out to you Steve... I have no idea what to say... except that after watching this I will try to be more understanding of people and their reactions to things... sending lots of love and well wishes your way Steve... xxx
The reality is that most people are not trust worthy that they will pass your secret on very quikly if interesting, that they are mildly narcissistik and therefore care mostly for their own well beeing meaning that they will betray you if beneficial, most people are shallow and worry about self image, your head may be screwed on better than you think you just take it to a way too high level you need to not care about people who will betray you.
Hey Steve... It takes a lot of courage to do what you did, which is confront your undesired emotions. I commend you on this video. I pray that you find treatment and are willing to trust others in the future.
You do have people that want to help. You do have people in college that are trying to understand the efficient manner to treat this disorder, as I am. All these sleepless nights that I must endure studying will all be worth it if I could gain the wisdom to help at least one person with your disorder. I will be thinking of this on my test tomorrow. Just know that you DO have people that want to help and YOU ARE NOT ALONE.
Steve, I know how you feel. I see it everyday with my clients. God will bless you and hold you near. Never forget you are here on this earth for a reason. You are very talented. I cried when I saw this video you created. You touch my heart.
what I find uncool is that you start suspecting people to judge you and think you're someone bad or something, so it makes you affraid, so you start having big eyes and a irregular breathing, like someone really stressed, so people really start looking at you, which doesnt help to cope with that... :/
amazing video! i myself suffer from PPD.. it does suck. I can relate to you in so many different ways. thank you for making this video, in a weird way, it makes me feel less alone knowing that there are many more people out there that feel and think the way I do. :)
I swear to god. Having this disorder makes it very hard to live. Every day i am around another human being i feel like im being watched. I feel guilty. Then my mind starts to race and i shake in fear and doubt. Even as i type this i feel like some of the people out there are going to use this information against me somehow and i really cant explain it. I wish i was normal.
you ARE normal. your brain works differently than other people...but not mine.
i grew up in a very strict and judgemental atmosphere; its no wonder i am the way i am. life is awful for me, especially this past year. you're not alone my friend.
OK here is how it works. Just don't let things get to you no matter what you think inside. Just suck it up! ACT normal and eventually you will see that many things that we perceived were misconceptions. It helps to build more normal thoughts. We're not psychotic. We have a suspicious way of looking at things. If you think people are talking about you just rise above it and you will be surprised when you find out they were talking about something entirely different. This helps change you.
...but we take each day as it comes. we must be grateful of the life we live and choices we make, family and friends we have (and that do stick with us).
hang in there buddy, it's a difficult ride sometimes, but you're not alone! in a way, it's relieving to know i'm not alone in how i am malfunctioning in society and whilst i'm not looking to be your friend (how odd would that be), i'd just like to finish on a stick in there buddy gesture! it's tough, but we'll to make it!
...possibly making me feel singled out or the victim. people tend to remember negative over positive and i put my relations at work down to too much putting the onus on the negative over the positive. thing is, i love people and try to treat everyone equally, sometimes i take remarks or rude behavior far too personal. it's ridiculous when you take a step back, but unfortunately once damage is done, it's hard to repair it.
i've got a lot of love to give and maybe my passion is wired wrong..
...creative individuals in a sometimes cruel world.
people simply do not understand the daily pain we suffer from from the actions we've unavoidably caused. inane comments or jokes can be taken badly and we react with hostility (in my case, never in violence - that's not in my nature) or take it totally the wrong way and make a tiny situation worse. this has been a constant in my life. friends have come and gone because of it and places of work have been really tough at points...
steve, this is a very powerful film. i have been doing research into potential personal problems and stumbled across ppd (among others) and totally understand and appreciate what you must be going through, I definitely believe ppd is what i'm suffering from (and have for most of my life). Your film has touched me and I too got upset at the end of the film. Well done for trying to spread the message!
Being positive, this does NOT make us bad people it means we are strong, sensitive and...
Merely - I am so sorry to hear about your split. That sounds really sad :(
This what I mean... I seem to hurt everyone the way you have been hurt. It's very distressing to have this kind of mental thought process.
Even when I love someone with all my heart I just ruin it by being over suspicious and all my partners start off by saying they will cope... They never can. x
so sad. i love a man who suffers with this and he hadn't been that bad until lately. the stress got to him and he made me move out. he thinks i have a secret cell phone and that men are following me and does not trust ANYONE. it is impossible to put up with constant distrust. he has a heart condition so the stress is dangerous. we were together all the time, so this would be impossible for me to have been disloyal anyhow nor did i ever want to! we were to be married in a few months. so sad. :(
I just broke up with a girl and I begged she tell me my behaviour so i can see a therapist and describe to them. After seeing this, This is basically me :-(
well you need to get into something where your acute awareness ? can see what others cannot , ie reseach etc , music ,writeing and so forth , should add i also am ppd , peter.
i have this too man, its not so bad anymore thought as ive managed to work through it a bit and ive learned a bit more of what is just paranoia and whats real. and example 2 i know EXACTLY how you feel lol its like you took that from my life, just a few days ago was the last time it happened. sucks man, any questions shoot me a PM if you wanna know some about how i am working on my paranoia
some chick at work bothered me now for QUITE some time now, constantly flirting & all that, thank god i made those movies of mine on my old docraver1976 account, when she asked me like you should see this movie & all, that gave me a idea, i told i have a good movie for you, and put on dvd from my borderline & paranoid personality disorder movies, hoping she would now fuck off, tomorrow i'll see her again, hopefully she will leave me alone now :)
i'll do that everytime now when some1 is getting close to me & all, just say that i got a great movie for her to see ( i named it the mask and say that its the originall movie that the mask with jim carey is based on in the 90's made & all ) and then when she is vieuwing it, then hopefully she will leave me alone :)
you should do that also, just explain & all how the story is with you, and then put that on dvd, if it works for me, then maybe for others too :)
i'm extremely happy you made this video, thank you..I too suffer from paranoid personality disorder.. i have come to relize that i always had some form of it but for me it really came to when i went away to college. It became such a problem for me that my mother had to pull me out of college because i wouldnt leave my room to go to class or even to eat. i thought maybe it would go away if i took a year off but i'm still the same. now i lock myself up in my room and manage to work 25 hours a week
what is more worse for me personally ( i have paranoid personality disorder ) is that people say like ah, your just exagerating or like that they try to understand you, or like say that like for everybody there is 1 person, while they just cannot understand why i choose NOT to be in a relationship ever again & all, they just can't accept that, think it's just for a little while and then try again & all, so you just put up a mask to not be bothered anymore with it, coz it hurts inside ...
what medication do you use? i use herbal prozac but sometimes i have it so bad that i need more & more & all, some people say then that i shouldnt take so mutch & all ( for overdose ) , if you could give me some names then i can do a search on internet for the advantage & disadvantage of that medicin & if i can use that or not & all, now herbal prozac is sufficient for me when i have it rough but its always good to have alternatives & all, that is if you are using medicine ( its hard to find . )
this has to do with these asshole ass people on the streets just looking at you, talking behind your back, following you, just simply ignorance and having envy towards you, their just jealous
hello friend. i want u to please know you are not the only one like this, i too have an odd and eccentic personality disorder. i have been diagnosed with not only PPD but SZPD. and have been told i show trates of schizotypal(though i dought this) all because i had a passive aggresive mother who beat me from time to time and i also have bipolar I disorder. just know u arnt alone and i know how its like to cant trust, so please if u wish, i will gladly help u as much as i can. dont end up like me.
i tried to make my bf realize that he has PPD. I was very tolerant of all his suspicions and mistrust, but he keeps saying i just wanna make him the sick one to get away with what he thinks are 'my lies'... i'm in love with him yet he thinks i always go to other people and plan things against him....i left all my friends for him but he thinks i'm still in touch with them... i just want to help him... how do you suggest i do that without offending him?..
im just like how your bf is, thinking people are planing against you... just tell him every single thing honestly and NEVER lie. and if he opens up and trusts u with his thorts about u planing against him then just understand and dont tell him hes being silly. dont throw it back in his face after hes able to tell u things like that. you dont know how hard it is
I understand how hard it is 2 think ppl r out 2 harm u. I was accused of many. I realized the intensity of his stories n how truly he believed in them, so i was patient, n i sent him PPD links, but he said 'ur sick n evil, not me'. He's sure of his thoughts n delusions 100%. He even got angry when 1-800 #s called thinkin i had set up a 'special code' 2 get intouch with the 'evil ppl'.. I only had HIM in my life though. It hurts me, but i wanna help, not run away. How were u convinced u had PPD?
well, when ever i was in school id get so paranoid id be thinking everyone was planing things against me, and id get so nervous and anxious id sweat and shiver because it effected me so badly. then it just got worse untill my parents had to pull me out of school. and thats when i thort they were in on this plan to embarres me too, thats what made things painfull, and it caused so much stress on our family we realised somthing was obiously wrong.. soo thas how we found out realy
My fiend, your not only, trust me.
REDBEARD885 4 days ago
I have most "symptoms" but I dont think of it as a "disorder" its more like reality. I cant count how many times my gut and "paranoia" told me someone was trying to screw me...everyone else would have said I had this disorder.
Turns out they were trying to screw me. These "symptoms" you list dont come from out of nowhere, they are born in reality and then you use those experiences to judge future experiences, nothing worng with that. Better safe than sorry.
agenthelios1 1 week ago
Holds everything in. Looks after own welfare. So focused on self that gossip about other's doesn't even seem to matter. Feels like a misfit yet strikes out if angered. Thinks everyone is looking at them. Holds a grudge and doesn't seem to need much human contact. This person takes their job or tasks very serious and they freak out very easily. Can anyone tell me what is wrong with this person? Been like this all their life but getting worse.
Kyjo34 1 week ago
I know someone that is kind of like that. This person I know argues even when you are not arguing back, says some of the meanest things and then apologizes later yet will do it again and again and never stops. This person has lack of care for others, takes everything serious, hard to make a decision, gets mad at the drop of a hat and will tear you apart. Does not sugar coat anything. Reacts without thinking. Does things and blames them on other's. Can't handle being wrong.
Kyjo34 1 week ago
Just found out that I have this... I'm devastated, I don't know what's real and what's not anymore. For a long time I just thought I was clever and was good at catching people out and working out their deceptions... now I realise it was the PPD talking. Thankyou for making this video, hopefully I can use it to help people understand what's wrong with me, because so far it seems like they can't grasp the severity of it.
dan0017 3 weeks ago
Oh man, I think the guy that I'm talking to is doing the same thing. Every time I don't reply in a certain amount of time, he'll ask who else I'm talking to and I'm like wth? It's getting to the point where he thinks that I'm everybody on here. It's annoying and makes me not want to talk to him. My grandmother has paranoia but it's different. She thinks everyone is stealing her stuff and she locks everything up. But my boyfriend is different. He thinks I'm cheating all the time. It breaks my <3
seeking911 1 month ago
Hey man, i suffer from this aswell, But i think i kinow the reason for my behavior. My mother was a liar, a cheater, and just about everything else. So, because i grew up around that my whole life, i tend to bring that into my realationship. its sucks man i know and im glad that i have found someone that can accept me for me. Keep your head up. God will find the perfect someone for you if he dosent help you change first!! :)
creamiercorn 1 month ago
Steve, the fact you are aware of your problem is fantastic! Know your 'enemy' to be able to fight it :-) You made this video in 2009, so I think you do feel better by now. In my family I've a person who thinks to be the only normal person between monsters with only very bad intentions (I'm one of those) so for that person I can't see a solution. My family is suffering a lot by it. My parents always agreed in all she says because they are afraid of her aggressive reactions & to hurt her feelings.
karatekla 3 months ago
Great Job Steve..... Congratulations on the Engagement! May you both be Blessed always!!
mariafromsa 3 months ago
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xAwkwardTurtle93 4 months ago
Thank you for making this video. I hope you don;t mind but I used it for a college class called abnormal psycholoogy. My project was on personality disorders. I felt this was a perfect video to show what someone with PPD goes through and how they feel :) Hope things are better for you.
sweetcanadiangirl 4 months ago
This is a beautifully honest video. I'm on the receiving end of PPD. It really isn't a nice place to be. My question is this: What's the best way to protect yourself against the wrongful allegations that someone with PPD can make about you? There comes a point where enough is enough. However, I am striving to be sensitive. Are there any ways to break through the wrongful mindset of someone with PPD?
nutritionistEsUK 5 months ago
Comment removed
nutritionistEsUK 5 months ago in playlist April 12th Abnormal Psych
A few years back i was diagnosed with 'a' personality disorder, after watching a few videos about ppd including this i thought "oh shit, it makes so much sense now". I've lost a most of my friends due to my actions and dilutions and find it very hard to even explain to them what goes on in my head. I wish i could change the way i think, it's ended up with me barley able to leave the house it gets that bad. But thank you so much for posting this video and i hope everyone going well for you J.D.C
ProfCornish 6 months ago
I am really paranoid and my mother said that I am paranoid about being paranoid.
GTAFreak829 6 months ago
This video brings me to tears every time i watch it. I commented on it around 2 yrs ago hopin i'd find a way to make my bf realize that it's just his PPD that's affecting his thoughts. I completely understand how hard it must be to admit havin ppd, i have literally forgiven endless bruises he has caused me cuz in the end i know his thoughts get to him. I've supported him in every way possible but he always turns around n says i'm so good at hidin things n must be lyin :( what more can i do??
farraw33 6 months ago
i have this and my stomach would just urge and all this though explode in my brain like oh they don't like me i just keep filling my brain with bullshit...I need help!!! how do you cope with it...
516poppop 6 months ago
I understand, I have it too. It's hard for me to get over the way people made fun of me and insulted me a long time ago, and that I try to stay happy, but it's just that I just want to be normal for a change.
Quilava42 7 months ago
I have Borderline Personality Disorder and have been in a relationship with someone for nearly three years (though we are more off than on) and I suspect now that he has PPD. I realise my infidelity (promiscuity) has not helped the situation but until I did a course on Personality Disorder (KUF) I seemed to forget it wasn't all just borderlines in the world... I realise now I barely knew him atall. I want to help. Thanks for sharing, I am so sorry for your pain. I never realised..... xx
Sanctuary1976 7 months ago
I think I have this. But I think people who are affected by this can consciously counter fight this way of thinking,and just stop it. I am now trying to think positive,and not doubt so much in my gf. Its just wrong pattern of thinking,you can correct it yourself,or else it may harm your personal life quite a lot. Good luck.
14Srb88 7 months ago
i know some body like this , he is a bad bastard he would never think any thing was wrong with him is is always somebody else fault persistant lier i could go on but it makes me angry
dontpanicblink 7 months ago
hey steve. i have really been researching paranoid schizophrenia and paranoid personality disorder and i understand you all. thanks for making this video and i hope you find someone who can really accept you and understand you. best wishes.
the0123qwerty0123 7 months ago
Your video helped me to forgive my paranoid mother. Thank you, sincerly.
Gneuhhh 7 months ago
@Gneuhhh My heart goes for you, my mom has the disorder too..and the best thing is to set boundaries with a lot of love and treat them with dignity..no one else does..but we do know because we care..
gris7501 1 week ago
This video made me cry, because I read every sentence and thought, "This is a perfect description of me!". I've been wondering about disorders like this for some time now, because I am one messed up Mofo! I knocked myself unconscious once just so I would stop worrying about my Girlfriend and where she was because she wasn't replying to my text. I hope you have a great marriage Steve, and Thanks for making this really insightful video! I finally have an explanation to my insanity :)
ThingsExplainedLike 8 months ago
Thank you for making this video, I can't imagine how hard it must have been for you. I went to see a school psychiatrist a couple of weeks ago because I was feeling depressed but didn't trust her so I didn't open up at all. Now Im starting to realise things like the symptoms you mentioned and as much as I want to deny it I think that may be whats causing my depression, thank you for helping me realise that.
krootkc 8 months ago
What I want to know is why anyone would actually be cured of PPD?
If you let your guard down, you will be back-stabbed by those who you thought were your "friends".
MaximillianZakes 8 months ago
how come at age 55 ive just realised im bipolar with all symptons ....... it took THC ... THE HONEST CHAPTER now there NO stopping me
0wey2011 8 months ago
I feel the same way, but I don't think it's a mental disorder. I don't think the world is out to get me, but I know most people are selfish scumbags. Every friend I've ever had has stabbed me in the back. What I do now is not take people seriously anymore. They're all just temporary.
travisbickelll 8 months ago
Steve- Thanks for sharing. My wife & I have a 26 year old son who has PPD. He refuses to take mediciation because of who knows why. We were wondering if you are on any type of meds and if so what and is it helping you deal with PPD? Your video is a lot what we think he is going through. God Bless, Waz
ruthmaryborg 8 months ago
Thank you for this video, too often people don't understand how I think, why I think that way or why I am alone. It hurts everyday. Seems like nothing can help. It's slightly comforting I am not alone.
Espoira 8 months ago
thanks a lot for this video. my wife is going through the same thing, and i used to get angry at her all the time for acting this way and pretty much sabotaging all her relationships, but when i discovered that she had an actual disorder, it helps me understand her and lessens my anger. Now I will break my back trying to help her as much as i can. i love her to death and will do anything i can to help her. i'll go to hell and back for her.
vash513 8 months ago
this is exactly what im "/ that was insprational tbhh....
MissySchitz 8 months ago
i go through that and i made a web page up with the way i think and people are mean to people like us because they dont understand me the vid was proudly done
MegaDarkangel420 8 months ago
Thanks so much for making this video. It was bravely done, and is a great help to those trying to understand.
walkerc585 8 months ago
whenever a paranoid thought pops up, just avoid thinking about. The very second it enters your mind, take a deep breath and think about something else. Its really hard at first, but it gets easier and easier the more you do it. After a short time, the delusion will just be gone, or at least easy to dismiss. This helped me alot
theCritic4128 9 months ago
Awesome video Steve. I can relate to this so much. Thank You for making this. It helps to know that I'm not the only one.
Crawdaddy75 9 months ago
Hi Steve.. nice video. have you seeked help like individual or supportive psychotherapy ? this can help.. you can see a psychologist. If you have too much anxiety, you might need to see a psychiatrist too.
Crishaana 9 months ago
Steve I am honestly really sorry for your condition. Life must seem like hell when you cant trust anyone. The times we live in dont help either. People have lost some of their humanity trying to get rich at all costs. We are all getting mistrustful. But what I do to try to judge a situation is how I would behave myself. For example sometimes I avoid calls of friends because I am tired or busy but I do love them and value them. I would be there for them. So I do not mind if they do the same to me
exMarlboroManGR 9 months ago
thank you for making this soo much. i recently found out i have this and this video meant alot to me. thank u...
ozzyoz69 9 months ago
Oh my god.. I actually cried at the end. I am so relieved. Thank you so much for the two examples. Now I finally know what's "wrong" with me. Thank you, Steve. Thank you.
MahiroWyster 9 months ago
Thank you for making this video. I too have PPD from past experiences and I feel as if it's ruining and going to continue ruining my life. I am engaged and fear because of it he's going to leave me. I try so hard to control it but it just doesn't work. Thank you again for making this video.
SjChick89 10 months ago
you are very talented Steve..it`s obvious your poured every ounce of pain into your creation...I would say almost all creativity stems from pain..pain is a great motivator...
keep strong : )))
boo2777 10 months ago
@boo2777 Actually, many people with psychiatric disorders are very creative.
Crishaana 9 months ago
you actually help me to understand my boyfriend situation.thanks steve for sharing!. godspeed. :)xoxoxo
topakera 10 months ago
this is no disorder.....ppl r deceitful, fraudulent, selfish and just plain evil....without getting too detailed about it, its these ppl who make up society and thus label "being aware" and being able to c thru there "moral/humane" disguises as PPD....ppl who r diagnosed with PPD r pure souls who r fed up with the bs everyone else indulges to get somewhere in life
incitetalife 11 months ago
@incitetalife one more thing....ur prolly right...if ppl dont return ur text in a day or so, then tell u they left there phone in the car or the phone was off, more than likely they r giving u an excuse....so ur not being paranoid about the read on the situation....its just that "normal" ppl r insensitive and don't le it bother them
incitetalife 11 months ago
So sorry about your disorder Steve. Trust me, I know it is NO JOKE. My mother was diagnoised with M.S. a few years ago and on rare occasions, some M.S. patients will get paranoia on the side and my mom was one of them. It sort of comes and goes though. She'll be good for a while and then maybe weeks later, she's accusing me of something as random as throwing something of her's in the trash or moving herthings around. I need to help her to remember to mention the paranoia to her doctor.
MJistheBOMB 11 months ago
I'm glad we had psychiatric subject last sem.
At first I thought it was a boring subject, but when we discussed different disorders I became more open-minded.
And this video helps me understand more about paranoid-personality disorders.
Kudos to you for making a video about yourself.
May God bless you always.
Jhcel2324 11 months ago
God loves you Steve. Always hang onto that!
plalelal 1 year ago
I'm paranoid of people, too. But not to this extreme.
lexxypexxy 1 year ago
EXCELLENT VID PRODUCTION! BEAUTIFUL SONG! HANG TOUGH MY FRIEND! FIND PEACE AND LOVE IN THE WORD, I.E. THE BIBLE AND A RELATIONSHIP WITH GOD.
plalelal 1 year ago
Steve, I am so grateful to you for putting this video up. I am sorry it hurt, and I wish there were more people who respond with understanding and compassion. I am here if you ever need anything.
I also saw the comment you left recently about being engaged!! I dont know you, but Im extremely happy for you.
rkgurl7 1 year ago
That video was exactly everything I feel and have to deal with. Im coming to terms with the way i think now but it really does ruin my life, I cant trust anyone I know and the slightest thing could make me turn against someone and just cut them out of my life. Was nice to hear ur story and to know Im not alone tho :) Hope ur doing ok xxx
TheBrianosaur 1 year ago
Such a sad disorder and it pains me to have gone through a similar situation with paranoia...my ex boyfriend was paranoid about many things and was constantly accusing me of cheating and contracting a disease and giving it to him...he harbored over my past and could not move forward...it hurt me to see him not trust me...not only did he suffer, but I suffered as well...I still love him and miss him...hope he is well...what can someone do to comfort or put their mind at ease? How can they trust?
MyDestroyedPsyche 1 year ago
@MyDestroyedPsyche ....i don't think its fair t blame it on your ex-boyfriend....sounds like u prolly slept around in the past (whether it be in relationships or casual).....which justifies his lack of trust....once u give it up u have nothing to give.....bottom line is no guy wants to buy a used car at new car prices...i think its gr8 u were promiscuous.....i say dont deny ur inner slut and continue banging......ur life will alwayz be defined by disastrous relationships so dont try
incitetalife 11 months ago
Awesome video! My husband has PPD, and there are people who are willing to live with this. I did not CHOSE to love him, I believe I was CHOSEN. And you are very brave to even admit that you have this disease. That is a huge huge statement of who you are.
momsumner 1 year ago
p.s. so am i paranoid then?
romallica 1 year ago
OMG example2 is me! If someone dsn't text me back straight away i assume they don't wanna talk to me, and if they don't txt after an hour i'm like"that's it! I should stop trying to be friends with that person clearly he/she doesn't wanna be friends with me" except that once they do txt i kinda forgive them and forget about it,, also for instance if a person on fb keeps sending me messages instead of posting on my wall i start thinking that he/she finds talking to me embarrassing..
romallica 1 year ago
Thanks for vid Hope your well and happy new year,
I thought it was just me and I was going crazy, I just can't cope anymore I suffer panic/anxiety attacks aswell and it's scary. I live in constant fear all the time.
alimags123 1 year ago
women problem....
ArabianFalcon1 1 year ago
Damm, i feel the same way but i also got characteristist of paranoid,borderlinane obsessive-compulsive PD's.
i wonder if therapy can cure this dissorder.
andresraya 1 year ago
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everybody type gifts befor youtube and click enter
gabilily 1 year ago
@pierneus UM? I'm dont understanding where you're getting at are you claiming PPD to not be much of a disorder? Forgive me if I'm wrong, but it's very serious. I have to face the other way in bed because I think it will somehow protect me from an airplane that I'm certain will crash into my house. When someone hits even a little bump in the road I always think they're planning to kill me in a car accident. I even think my baby sister is conspiring against the family.
Its very serious.
XTheGreenSkyX 1 year ago
example 2 is so true.... :(
Im 17 and i've recently met a girl and i love her so much but i hate the way i think of her sometimes ( being suspicious and all ) because she doesn't text me back. And yet her excuse is that her battery died. And it gets even worse when i see her talking with other guys. ( Even when i know she loves me and she wouldn't cheat on me but on the other side i still think she might not like me anymore and that she might wants someone else )
This video made me cry...
percytje666 1 year ago
I've got all of the above, so what? I'm just fully aware that people cannot be trusted in general. I always give them a chance, but with suspicion. This attitude has actually helped me to achieve a better life. It's better to be realistic than deluded and believe that people are good and trustworthy. Just look at the what the government really does to all of us instead of blindly believing that they protect our best interests (just one example). I like the video and the music, by the way! :)
pierneus 1 year ago
@pierneus Oh so you mean that being suspicious isn't a bad thing? well normally it isn't but when its severe then you've got a problem, that's the point of this.
XTheGreenSkyX 1 year ago
Hey Steve...how are you doing? I totally love this video and i thank you for it. Coming froma Mexican household they don't understand this disorder i have. This video helped them understand. I am VERY paranoid of people and specificly men. I have an intense fear of opening up and sharing my entire being with men. Your two example at the end were accurate to what i go through. Thank you thank you thank you for bringing awareness to this. I was beginning to think i was crazy and the only one.
ActsofGoths10 1 year ago
@ActsofGoths10 Heya, I am doing good. Actually got engaged now. Found someone that totally understands :D Still find it hard to trust and need to know where they are all the time, but this has felt the easiest.
I am glad my video has helped you a tiny bit.
Hugs
Steve x
stevietrixta 1 year ago 10
after this video i just came to find out that i am dignosed with paranoia. :/
bizzarboy2 1 year ago
This comment has received too many negative votes show
Those examples were piss poor. Most of the time when people don't respond to texts or calls and say they left their phone is the car, or it was dead, they ARE lying and WERE choosing to ignore you. haha. please give better examples. those are examples of something that people do to eachother all the time. it doesnt neccisarilly mean they hate you. i ignore friends and my gf's calls all the time, as they do to me. we're just busy or dont wanna talk. who cares. go eat some more sad muffins. tryagn
wonhundredtruth 1 year ago
@wonhundredtruth Thanks for taking the time to watch my video and comment.
I notice all your video comments are you expressing anger and hate. I hope everything is ok?
Best
Steve
stevietrixta 1 year ago 4
@stevietrixta Dont worry Steve, this person is what we call a Troll. He elevates his own self esteem by being hypercritical of those around him and constantly seeks attention to validate his own inflated ego. These individuals often suffer from a cognitive bias known as the Dunning-Kruger effect in which they believe that they are far more knowledgeable and intuitive than they actually are. This is why this individual is insistent while demonstrating that he lacks any understanding of the topic
darkchaos454 1 year ago
@stevietrixta hey steve i suffer from the same disorder ,,its hard for people to understand us but its ok we don't have to be sorry its not like we want to be like this i come across as an asshole sometimes and it hurts me because i think im a nice guy but i cant help it my gf suffers with me i tell her lets break up cuz i don't want u to suffer but she wont leave lol just be strong man there is a lot of people out there who suffer ,,,its ok at least i think its ok to suffer .
behzad500bc 8 months ago
@wonhundredtruth The phone thing was a fine example. It was only an hour or two, and he started feeling it at 5 minutes. Some people aren't glued to their phones, ready to reply instantly. Some do reply, when they get around to it, because they don't think the text is urgent. There are lots of reasons. The first of all the possible explanations that he thinks of is they don't want to talk to him. That's a paranoid way of thinking.
qwexas 1 year ago
This has been flagged as spam show
@wonhundredtruth "those are examples of something that people do to eachother all the time. it doesnt neccisarilly mean they hate you." Exactly. That's why the examples are so good. He interprets things like that as being hated. That's how paranoia works. They could mean a lot of things, but look which explanation he chooses. He's trying to show how unreasonably he thinks.
qwexas 1 year ago
@wonhundredtruth wow, i know this is a late response. but the problem he's explaining is that someone with the disorder will believe that the ONLY conclusion is that they were being ignored. to the person suffer from this disorder, there is NO OTHER REASON. they can't even accept that it's a POSSIBILITY that what the person said was true. so, yes, it's still a perfectly fine example.
vash513 8 months ago
@wonhundredtruth : that's what he's trying to explain to people. while that is a common occurence, the way a person with PPD reacts to that situation is different. You know they may have been busy or didn't feel like talking. They automatically think the person hates them.
16jambone 5 months ago
This has been flagged as spam show
@wonhundredtruth : that's what he's trying to explain to people. while that is a common occurence, the way a person with PPD reacts to that situation is different. You know they may have been busy or didn't feel like talking. They automatically think the person hates them.
16jambone 5 months ago
Why do i have this disorder?
i think god hates us....lol
BasementDweller09 1 year ago
Hi stevie.How r you now? Can i ask? Did you consult a doctor? How did you know your suffering from this disorder? I'm interested to know more about this. I've just met a friend recently, and your examples in the video really fit for her. I think she has ppd too..
buttercupbeybeh 1 year ago
I have been diagnosed with this, and as difficult as it is to deal with, the diagnosis made a big difference to me. I have always be introspective, so knowing means I can challenge my thoughts once I have, like you, given myself a few days to get over my initial thoughts. I need a couple of days... and then i can try to put things into perspective. It's hard though, I often feel ashamed, or lonely, or angry, or lost.
supatuba1 1 year ago
i think i have a li'l bit of this, as i grow older i am starting to lose trust in some of my frends, i always think that they are trying to use me, sometimes the smallest insluts hurt me afterwards, although im regarded as a funny guy and all of the people i know dont really h8 me. on the bright side its nice to know its just something in your mind and ppl dont actually think of you this way.
MrFreshasMint 1 year ago
do u think i could have it? my syptoms r
extreme parinioa(i search public restrooms when i go in them and my bedroom before i can feel even 2% less pariniod)
i don't trust any1 because i think that they r plotting something against me
i'm loosing touch with reality(my life is starting to feel like i'm the star of the truman show)
i hate alot of attention,if there's 2 other people in the room and they r just looking at me i get pariniod as fuck,i hold grudges for a very long time
amazingaustin13 1 year ago
@amazingaustin13 That doesn't sound like paranoid personality disorder at all. Schizotypal personality disorder, maybe. Psychotic delusions, maybe. Someone with PPD might suspect others (specific real people they have met, like friends, not people who might not even exist/ boogie men) of spreading rumors, manipulating, secretly hating them, infidelity - plausible things. Not plotting something or hiding in your bedroom. (Are you serious?)
qwexas 1 year ago
can relate.. i have a disorder called schizotypal and anxiety disorders. i prefer to be alone. have always had trust issues.
rustydusty40 1 year ago
This was so powerful. I really hope that you find contentment, happiness and stability soon. And I'm not just saying that - I feel a lot of the things that you described, and it's a suffocating kind of existence to not trust anyone even when you want to. I can only hope that things will improve for you. And send you lots of e-hugs. x
Sapphirepearlz 1 year ago
I want to say that I have a father that has this same disorder. I feel your pain because I feel his. Please keep your head up. No matter what it isn't worth giving up. Life is so hard for all of us and I hope that you look at the things that make you smile, that make you laugh.
My heart goes out to you. Stay strong.
ThunderJesse 1 year ago
hi steve, there's a book called feeling good by david burns, i think you will find it helpful .
you don't have to suffer this pattern of thinking.
salx
anon72 1 year ago
I want to give you a hug!
It made me realise why my friends behaves how she does!
I feel so ignorant to know now what I should have known then!
This video has really opened my eyes & thankyou, and if you were gay (& I older) I would stay with you forever
Keep strong, George
<3
bobyloser 1 year ago
Thanks again guys for all of your lovely comments. Am So glad this has been of some help. I am still struggling x
stevietrixta 1 year ago
@stevietrixta hey. you WONT be single forever. you find someone who loves you and can see past the PPD. you find someone that recognizes your symptoms and knows exactly how to calm you down or cheer you up. i did. i didnt think it was possible but it is. and i do still have psychotic breaks but im getting better. it WILL get better. and thank you for this video. i love moby btw
benjajammin113 1 year ago
Thank you for uploading this. I find myself feeling this way, thinking I am going out of my mind, unsure how to explain it to others. I have not been diagnosed with PPD but I am going to talk with my doctor about it. I do not feel normal and need to find the appropriate help to manage this. Be strong.
vhopson 1 year ago
kudos to you for trying help people see the world how you are forced to. I wish you the very best.
47llinside 1 year ago
thanks for posting this beautifully done vid!! I understand alot more now.
btgreypaws 1 year ago
my mom is like this she always says that people follow her taht people hate her
that someone wants to kill her shes aways talking to her self
it makes me soo sad :( because she always feel down :(
and i dhont know what to do how to help her from
na0mi0 1 year ago
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trollcrusher242 1 year ago
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trollcrusher242 1 year ago
Well for one thing, you're correct to be suspicious of others, especially a girlfriend, because it's rare that one is actually trustworthy.. Call me paranoid too, I don't care, but I've remained single for the same reasons.
Smashinz2002 1 year ago
For The Past Few Years, Ive Been Having These Symptoms, Ive Been Telling My Self To Change But I Simply Couldn't. I Came Across This Disorder Today, And This Video. I Realised About An Hour Ago That I Have This Disorder After Researching My Symptoms, Im Somewhat Happy To Know That Its This Disorder, And Not Me In Genral. Thank You So Much For Posting This Video, And Making Me Realise What My Disorder Is About. Thank You So Much.
GunsMurder 1 year ago
@GunsMurder PPD is a PERSONALITY disorder. Personality IS who you are. It's not like a flu that's a virus that enters your body and makes you sick when you would normally be healthy. It's more of a maladaptive lifestyle. Just because you know the name doesn't explain anything or mean it's not you. All the name/diagnosis does is make it easier to talk about and think about so you can try to do something about it.
qwexas 1 year ago
I always stop talking to people i know due these feelings and after a long time they'll be like whats happening to me, why dont i talk to them anymore, when they try to contact me again proves me that they dont really hate me, it was just me :(
killuminati007 1 year ago
Steve, try not to worry about all of this, i was just the same, the examples you said i was exactly the same way, eventually i actually found the girl im with now, ive been with her for over a year and 4 months now and everything is perfect, she has obviously changed over the time as have I, and I believe that one day you shall find someone like that too, that will change for you, and that you could possibly change for, what im trying to say is, just try be as happy as you can be until that day
Newworldfortomorrow 1 year ago
This is also referred to as Nancy Grace Syndrome.
WeAreSoScrewed 1 year ago
I feel so sad for you. You were very brave to post this video even though it hurt you to do so. My brother suffers from this and last year he attempted suicide by shooting himself in the chest. He became this way from being raised by my abusive father and permissive mother. He won't believe that he is paranoid and he gets angry whenever we point out that people did not do the things he is accusing them of. He also has grandiose plans to invent things that will solve the world's fuel crisus.
Sunshine100 1 year ago
I have been living exactly the way you did. I didn't know I have PPD until last year but I refused to acknowledge I have it and have not seeked any help. I am having a relationship currently and he just proposed to me. At the same time its getting very tensed between us. As we try to start planning on the wedding, the suspicion and insecurity is building up so much. I don't think he can put up with me forever. I will be ruining his life if I choose to marry him right?
Barcelona7710 1 year ago
dont ever feel bad for being cautious it can actually save you from a lot of people who prey on the ones who are too trusting! the key is to be somewhere in the middle. Its ok to trust but one should never let their guard down 100%! find a balance i think thats the key!
JAMESBONG100 1 year ago
Another thing is constantly picking apart what people do and say, to confirm your conviction that they're using you. When I tell people about my reasons for breaking up with someone, it always seems absurd to them, when it was so rational to me. And all the while, I do it just to avoid getting hurt or being perceived as pathetic.
RymvTheGod 1 year ago
found out a day ago my paps has this he thinks the're cameras in the tv so he pulls me into the bathroom to talk to me everytime, he thinks my mom poisns his food, he thinks my moms cheating but then he says i know she can never do something like that?? wtf so contradictory it's dreadfull because at the end of the day its not his fault
1990banks 1 year ago
thanks for making that man...i have it too and nobody really understands at all...thanks for making this.
blackfire27x 1 year ago
Steve I felt your pain through that video ...try to remember one thing ...we 'all' have something we wish we could change about ourselves...we may not live with these thoughts everyday but you have educated us about how some have to live with it. Thank you ...you may have PPD but you have very special qualities. All the best with your journey x
downunderlady 1 year ago
steve Jesus Loves you
worldchangerbook 1 year ago
I destroyed my marriage and following relationships because of this. Now I am not going to bother with finding another partner because I know it will just turn out the same way as the last one. I wont trust her, she will try to earn my trust and I will just fucking destroy her. I'm over it, it's better for me and other people if I just live by myself. It sucks though.
Sdea1903 1 year ago
this video is incredible, it shows excatly how i feel on a day to day basis, and i am going to use it to show family/friends how my head works in the hope they will better understand me. THANK-YOU
kylie240283 1 year ago
I thoughyt this was me, but its not at all thank god :-)
KLRBCommunication 1 year ago
for all these years i couldnt figure it out but now its clear to me...i have ppd. all these years of stressing and getting depressed over nothing. i mean, i always tell myself its nothing.
adam161 1 year ago
Oh my gosh... I had no idea anything like this even existed.... My heart really goes out to you Steve... I have no idea what to say... except that after watching this I will try to be more understanding of people and their reactions to things... sending lots of love and well wishes your way Steve... xxx
jessiesmum169 1 year ago
The reality is that most people are not trust worthy that they will pass your secret on very quikly if interesting, that they are mildly narcissistik and therefore care mostly for their own well beeing meaning that they will betray you if beneficial, most people are shallow and worry about self image, your head may be screwed on better than you think you just take it to a way too high level you need to not care about people who will betray you.
PonDeAttack 1 year ago
Hey Steve... It takes a lot of courage to do what you did, which is confront your undesired emotions. I commend you on this video. I pray that you find treatment and are willing to trust others in the future.
Latinole 1 year ago
You do have people that want to help. You do have people in college that are trying to understand the efficient manner to treat this disorder, as I am. All these sleepless nights that I must endure studying will all be worth it if I could gain the wisdom to help at least one person with your disorder. I will be thinking of this on my test tomorrow. Just know that you DO have people that want to help and YOU ARE NOT ALONE.
God Bless.
-Cisco
Latinole 1 year ago 4
Steve, I know how you feel. I see it everyday with my clients. God will bless you and hold you near. Never forget you are here on this earth for a reason. You are very talented. I cried when I saw this video you created. You touch my heart.
Debbie
dbooth01 1 year ago
what I find uncool is that you start suspecting people to judge you and think you're someone bad or something, so it makes you affraid, so you start having big eyes and a irregular breathing, like someone really stressed, so people really start looking at you, which doesnt help to cope with that... :/
hoboterror 1 year ago
That video was the very way I am.And I thought I was the only person like this.Maybe im not alone after all.....
slick196868 1 year ago
amazing video! i myself suffer from PPD.. it does suck. I can relate to you in so many different ways. thank you for making this video, in a weird way, it makes me feel less alone knowing that there are many more people out there that feel and think the way I do. :)
returnoftheidiots 1 year ago
I swear to god. Having this disorder makes it very hard to live. Every day i am around another human being i feel like im being watched. I feel guilty. Then my mind starts to race and i shake in fear and doubt. Even as i type this i feel like some of the people out there are going to use this information against me somehow and i really cant explain it. I wish i was normal.
Sharpie4123 1 year ago
you ARE normal. your brain works differently than other people...but not mine.
i grew up in a very strict and judgemental atmosphere; its no wonder i am the way i am. life is awful for me, especially this past year. you're not alone my friend.
AndyJackson1776 1 year ago
my comment isn't posting again.
aleon1018 1 year ago
I've only watched one other video on this and had saved it awhile ago. My father was a real pain to live with and work for.
I was doomed to fail because that was what he expected of me.
After 9/11 I walked away from everything schizophrenic. Hard to accept I did that now, but can think more about why.
I know for a fact that I've been under that Truman Show Syndrome for years.
I'm a victim of mind control
It's what I accept as real, but want apologies and not just from Bill Clinton
aleon1018 1 year ago
OK here is how it works. Just don't let things get to you no matter what you think inside. Just suck it up! ACT normal and eventually you will see that many things that we perceived were misconceptions. It helps to build more normal thoughts. We're not psychotic. We have a suspicious way of looking at things. If you think people are talking about you just rise above it and you will be surprised when you find out they were talking about something entirely different. This helps change you.
catsalive1 1 year ago
...but we take each day as it comes. we must be grateful of the life we live and choices we make, family and friends we have (and that do stick with us).
hang in there buddy, it's a difficult ride sometimes, but you're not alone! in a way, it's relieving to know i'm not alone in how i am malfunctioning in society and whilst i'm not looking to be your friend (how odd would that be), i'd just like to finish on a stick in there buddy gesture! it's tough, but we'll to make it!
peace & thanx!
pughga 1 year ago
...possibly making me feel singled out or the victim. people tend to remember negative over positive and i put my relations at work down to too much putting the onus on the negative over the positive. thing is, i love people and try to treat everyone equally, sometimes i take remarks or rude behavior far too personal. it's ridiculous when you take a step back, but unfortunately once damage is done, it's hard to repair it.
i've got a lot of love to give and maybe my passion is wired wrong..
pughga 1 year ago
...creative individuals in a sometimes cruel world.
people simply do not understand the daily pain we suffer from from the actions we've unavoidably caused. inane comments or jokes can be taken badly and we react with hostility (in my case, never in violence - that's not in my nature) or take it totally the wrong way and make a tiny situation worse. this has been a constant in my life. friends have come and gone because of it and places of work have been really tough at points...
pughga 1 year ago
steve, this is a very powerful film. i have been doing research into potential personal problems and stumbled across ppd (among others) and totally understand and appreciate what you must be going through, I definitely believe ppd is what i'm suffering from (and have for most of my life). Your film has touched me and I too got upset at the end of the film. Well done for trying to spread the message!
Being positive, this does NOT make us bad people it means we are strong, sensitive and...
pughga 1 year ago
Merely - I am so sorry to hear about your split. That sounds really sad :(
This what I mean... I seem to hurt everyone the way you have been hurt. It's very distressing to have this kind of mental thought process.
Even when I love someone with all my heart I just ruin it by being over suspicious and all my partners start off by saying they will cope... They never can. x
stevietrixta 1 year ago
so sad. i love a man who suffers with this and he hadn't been that bad until lately. the stress got to him and he made me move out. he thinks i have a secret cell phone and that men are following me and does not trust ANYONE. it is impossible to put up with constant distrust. he has a heart condition so the stress is dangerous. we were together all the time, so this would be impossible for me to have been disloyal anyhow nor did i ever want to! we were to be married in a few months. so sad. :(
Merely 2 years ago
I just broke up with a girl and I begged she tell me my behaviour so i can see a therapist and describe to them. After seeing this, This is basically me :-(
KLRBCommunication 2 years ago
From someone with PPD, I may not be pleasant to be around, but I am still around.
catsalive1 2 years ago
just like me but I GOT IT WORSE ... help me ... someone...
iamahiphopgilrlYO 2 years ago
well you need to get into something where your acute awareness ? can see what others cannot , ie reseach etc , music ,writeing and so forth , should add i also am ppd , peter.
ThePetersturgeon 2 years ago
This is just like me. I think I've got this, but a mild case? You seem to have it worse. But the examples really hit home.
FreshPrincess0h 2 years ago
i have this too man, its not so bad anymore thought as ive managed to work through it a bit and ive learned a bit more of what is just paranoia and whats real. and example 2 i know EXACTLY how you feel lol its like you took that from my life, just a few days ago was the last time it happened. sucks man, any questions shoot me a PM if you wanna know some about how i am working on my paranoia
Linqua2112 2 years ago
im the same try prozac it will help!!
dubbymacky 2 years ago
i wish it would help the gear i am on would knock an elephant out....and i still don't think it works
yampeefern 2 years ago
Steve this video absolutely nails it and i thankyou for posting it as a fellow ppd sufferer i know whats its like................thanks again
yampeefern 2 years ago
Find a woman with ppd haha
EddyMcK 2 years ago
Thanks guys for your kind words xxx
stevietrixta 2 years ago
some chick at work bothered me now for QUITE some time now, constantly flirting & all that, thank god i made those movies of mine on my old docraver1976 account, when she asked me like you should see this movie & all, that gave me a idea, i told i have a good movie for you, and put on dvd from my borderline & paranoid personality disorder movies, hoping she would now fuck off, tomorrow i'll see her again, hopefully she will leave me alone now :)
DocRaverDieHard 2 years ago
i'll do that everytime now when some1 is getting close to me & all, just say that i got a great movie for her to see ( i named it the mask and say that its the originall movie that the mask with jim carey is based on in the 90's made & all ) and then when she is vieuwing it, then hopefully she will leave me alone :)
you should do that also, just explain & all how the story is with you, and then put that on dvd, if it works for me, then maybe for others too :)
its like sending a letter
DocRaverDieHard 2 years ago
its like sending a letter then in a friendly way to fuck off explaining why & all ...
DocRaverDieHard 2 years ago
May God bless you, Steve. You are in my prayers!
albertancel 2 years ago
Yes, me too........
littlequeen64 2 years ago
i'm extremely happy you made this video, thank you..I too suffer from paranoid personality disorder.. i have come to relize that i always had some form of it but for me it really came to when i went away to college. It became such a problem for me that my mother had to pull me out of college because i wouldnt leave my room to go to class or even to eat. i thought maybe it would go away if i took a year off but i'm still the same. now i lock myself up in my room and manage to work 25 hours a week
MrShwettyballs 2 years ago
If people like you didn't tell about their problem, how would we uncover our own? Thankyou...
cushym8 2 years ago
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oompatootle 2 years ago
what is more worse for me personally ( i have paranoid personality disorder ) is that people say like ah, your just exagerating or like that they try to understand you, or like say that like for everybody there is 1 person, while they just cannot understand why i choose NOT to be in a relationship ever again & all, they just can't accept that, think it's just for a little while and then try again & all, so you just put up a mask to not be bothered anymore with it, coz it hurts inside ...
DocRaverDieHard 2 years ago
plus the symptoms can't change so i am not sure what you were getting at?
x
stevietrixta 2 years ago
what medication do you use? i use herbal prozac but sometimes i have it so bad that i need more & more & all, some people say then that i shouldnt take so mutch & all ( for overdose ) , if you could give me some names then i can do a search on internet for the advantage & disadvantage of that medicin & if i can use that or not & all, now herbal prozac is sufficient for me when i have it rough but its always good to have alternatives & all, that is if you are using medicine ( its hard to find . )
DocRaverDieHard 2 years ago
xluvdemondx
I have done this video to make people aware of the illness... i have never been on Wikipedia in my life... i used other sources to get examples.
Then the obvious examples are my own interpretation
Steve x
stevietrixta 2 years ago
this has to do with these asshole ass people on the streets just looking at you, talking behind your back, following you, just simply ignorance and having envy towards you, their just jealous
bbb131 2 years ago
im sorry but if u felt like this you could put it in your own words, cause if i made a video youd know it wasnt of wikipedia.
it should come from how you feel if you can cause ino its hard.
xluvdemondx 2 years ago
hello friend. i want u to please know you are not the only one like this, i too have an odd and eccentic personality disorder. i have been diagnosed with not only PPD but SZPD. and have been told i show trates of schizotypal(though i dought this) all because i had a passive aggresive mother who beat me from time to time and i also have bipolar I disorder. just know u arnt alone and i know how its like to cant trust, so please if u wish, i will gladly help u as much as i can. dont end up like me.
xkalviex 2 years ago
i tried to make my bf realize that he has PPD. I was very tolerant of all his suspicions and mistrust, but he keeps saying i just wanna make him the sick one to get away with what he thinks are 'my lies'... i'm in love with him yet he thinks i always go to other people and plan things against him....i left all my friends for him but he thinks i'm still in touch with them... i just want to help him... how do you suggest i do that without offending him?..
farraw33 2 years ago
im just like how your bf is, thinking people are planing against you... just tell him every single thing honestly and NEVER lie. and if he opens up and trusts u with his thorts about u planing against him then just understand and dont tell him hes being silly. dont throw it back in his face after hes able to tell u things like that. you dont know how hard it is
xluvdemondx 2 years ago
I understand how hard it is 2 think ppl r out 2 harm u. I was accused of many. I realized the intensity of his stories n how truly he believed in them, so i was patient, n i sent him PPD links, but he said 'ur sick n evil, not me'. He's sure of his thoughts n delusions 100%. He even got angry when 1-800 #s called thinkin i had set up a 'special code' 2 get intouch with the 'evil ppl'.. I only had HIM in my life though. It hurts me, but i wanna help, not run away. How were u convinced u had PPD?
farraw33 2 years ago
well, when ever i was in school id get so paranoid id be thinking everyone was planing things against me, and id get so nervous and anxious id sweat and shiver because it effected me so badly. then it just got worse untill my parents had to pull me out of school. and thats when i thort they were in on this plan to embarres me too, thats what made things painfull, and it caused so much stress on our family we realised somthing was obiously wrong.. soo thas how we found out realy
xluvdemondx 2 years ago