me and psychosis pt1

[bombfuckinhadston]

i dnt know if this is the start of me going insane but ive never heard voices but ive been lying in bed and ive heard music in my right ear clear as anything its happened quite a few times not just in bed though and no its not music from an outside source but it sounds like its in my head

[starseedleo]

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[LaBellaa1984]

i get psychotic because of other delusional people who are scared and unselfishsure! is that normal, it triggers something, i never wanna meet delusional people again they influence me they suck me into their dark psychotic black hole

[TheMrFRITZLjosef1]

i yawn and cough to try n block the voices but i cant really explain it but it would kind of creep back without me knowing. The voices what i remember hearing is people from years ago at school or terrified screams...i hallucinate aswee#ll usually myself looking back at me with abnormal eyes i also get really bad paralysis thats were the worst of my voices n seeing things happen. i cant go out im severly paranoid

[blackkat77]

ive had both psychosis and mania.... i really liked mania until it started changing who I was... psychosis is just- your really lost and scared. Mania is like your on speed until you crash really bad and lose grip with reality.

[DieSonneSinkt]

If you tried a little, you could look like Glen Gould...

[CounterActPsych]

I think you are right though that it IS about boundaries between people and it is a social problem as well...Have you hear of Mindfreedom Ireland? I am assuming you are Irish...connect with survivours

[discobob1983]

I'm 26 years old and recently had a psychotic episode when I moved into my new house. Just wanted to say thanks to squidboot for helping me to make sense of a lot of things that were happening in my own mind.

[ZombieProm1970]

ppl ppl ppl who cares if ppl think were crazy a very bad person gave me a horrible diagnosis and now i see everything clear to all u ppl who hear voices do wat they want UR BRAIN WANTS WAT UR BRAIN WANTS dnt let anybody get in ur way and do wat u like to do the most doesnt matter wat it is HAVE SOME FUN HAHAH

[rosko85]

he's tripping balls. his pupils are extremely dialated.

[Cubicle0]

@rosko85

How can you even tell?

[rosko85]

manerisms in speech, dialated pupils.

[Cubicle0]

The quality of the video is much too low. Don't you think it's more likely that his eyes are just brown? As for the mannerisms, both schizophrenics and trippers are like that.

[rosko85]

thank you for that professor

[shenmue4life]

any guy that looks like venetian snares is a true nutter in my book... Not that thats a bad thing at all :)

[soggyleftovers]

i think psychosis is a result of excessive copper in nerve cells. a couple of weeks of taking zinc and manganese supplements will flush excess copper from the system. give it a shot.

[orionj]

no psychosis is mutch more than that... i whuld know iv been diegnosed with it evry sence i was 14 (im 18 now) lets just say its not a plesent thing to have wrong with you and no, its not about zinc or copper.... god, how did you evan think of somthing like that!?!

[Fortyn9n3]

@orionj

how did you get psychosis?

and is it like your in a dream where you don't know what's real and what's not?

[ColdDeath1332]

i think i have psychosis not sure though i fit the description of the word though...

[yvettefoto]

Count me in! I was completely terrorized by an evil spirit/alien touching me all the time and floating around in front of me...All the time! HELL! I completely believe its a demon because it all started one nice summer day when I was a kid and a green angel appeared right in front of me. I couldn't see through him...EVIL EVIL DEMON! Watch the Fuck Out!

[rolling4life379]

I could relate to everything you said up to the point to mentioned hallucinations and such strong delusions. I feel like i have conditioned my mind to operate in different ways, cognitively, with my ego, with my super ego etc.....sometimes i feel like my mind and my body have seperate wills. Does it sound like im developing something? im 19 years old.

[BellaChanson]

I also think often i havea brain tumour....but my bf said im being a weirdo when i told him...

[BellaChanson]

I haven't seen this whole video yet, but do you ever have imaginary conversations with people for hours on end? I do...I talk and talk to my voice teacher and my (ex) therapist....i gave up on therapy...it felt like bs....

[marklosextremus]

go to a psychiatrist again then stop asking for attention on here

[BellaChanson]

I was just relating. Not everything is about attention. It's just good sometimes to feel less alone in a situation.

[BellaChanson]

Oh my god...I actually think people are reading my mind too...like my voice teacher whom i practically worship....I also think people hate me and that people are staring at me and thinking bad things. Also I don't remember anything about the past two weeks of my life...

[KoroOutbreak]

Also, I am 31, and interestingly right around 27 is when I started to sort of become unhinged in a lot of ways, though of course my experience is different than yours, I think 27-28 is a common year where shit gets awry if you are at all prone to these kinds of things and you are male.

[KoroOutbreak]

Pretty fascinating. I doubt I would work well in advertising. I've been "diagnosed" with stuff which I'd rather not communicate on the internet, but yes, I would fucking snap if I had to work in advertising. I know that much about myself.

[russellbar01]

The whole world is insane to me

[TheOutsider13]

Haha. I was talking to TLO421. He made stupid remarks on mental illness and didn't know what he was talking about. Not you Squidboot. ^_^

[squidboot]

sorry :( my bad :)

[ludwigmarcuse]

Hi, I can share some of your experiences and, the smooth way you are telling your story here helped me a lot, to extract all the stories I have lived during my own psychosis, which have disappeared because of too much stress to get "normal" again. Thanx.

[doogims12345]

were u into drugs?

[bukenda]

thnx but u do have ya good days and ur bad days

[TLO421]

really psychosis? i would think from your story it seems more skitzophrenia and borderline personality disorder

[suspectdevice7]

TL0421....when did you qualify as a psychiatist? Schizophrenics suffer psychosis, bi-polar sufferers too. Read the definition of psychosis, it's not specific to one mental illness.

[TLO421]

you seem to be talking more about the general term psycopathy if your bringing bipolar into it... i was wrong at the fact that skitzophrenia is totally different from psychosis which it is not...my mistake... the definition of psychosis generally means a mental disease where odd thoughts, hallucinations, and almost dissociation from reality..there are 9 formal psycotic disorders i wont liste them all but not all of em such as bipolar is on there..skitzophrenia is though and im sorry for sayin it

[TheOutsider13]

Once again...do your research. You clearly have no idea what you are talking about. Lol.

[TheOutsider13]

Psychosis is a side effect of Schizophrenia as well as dellusions. BPD doesn't typically include psychosis. Unless you have researched mental disorders or are a licensed psychologist, I wouldn't reccomend adding in your 2 cents unless you know what the hell you are talking about.

[squidboot]

i'm a psychology degree student, i make a living supporting people with a range of conditions one of which is schizophrenia and, as the video states, i'm describing my own experience of psychosis. schizophrenia is a complex of conditions, one of which includes psychosis. psychosis can emerge from a host of situations including stress disorders, depression and drug abuse. it can be understood as exaggerated normal cognition, and even an integral part of so called "religious" experience.

[greyleadwizard]

I really don't know where you got 'exaggerated normal cognition' from. The rest, yeahhh sure it is vulnerability model + genetic + structural + neurotransmitter elements. Where do you study psych, and who are some of your lecturers?

[squidboot]

i study with the OU in the UK. the people who write the course can be found here: (link on your site)

"exaggerated normal cognition" is to say that psychosis can be understood as adaptive mechanisms under too much &/or the wrong type of stress. this view is pretty well accepted. one instance of support for it can be found here (ditto)

[CaliMacDaddy510]

@squidboot i have a mental illness but aint sure what it might be. its like im living in a dream, unreality, hard to think, severe depression, & lack of energy. can you please name some mental illness that i might have?

[LaLune44]

@CaliMacDaddy510

sounds like bipolar 2, I have bipolar type 1 and suffer more mania than depression but the symptoms you listen sound like it. And yes I said 'suffer" more mania...it's not always the blessing everyone thinks it is, it's not all just speed up and happy cloud nine....

[LaLune44]

@CaliMacDaddy510

@CaliMacDaddy510

sounds like bipolar 2, I have bipolar type 1 and suffer more mania than depression but the symptoms you listen sound like it. And yes I said 'suffer" more mania...it's not always the blessing everyone thinks it is, it's not all just speed up and happy cloud nine....I end up going through psychosis state a lot of the time before mania.

[mattchew1993]

@CaliMacDaddy510

Derealization. Look it up. It's not a mental illness but it does suck, I've had it for 2 years.

[bukenda]

i wana die i have a bad case of psychois

[squidboot]

it's a very stressful state to be in. if you aren't already i'd advise you go and see a professional. i hope things get better for you soon.

[bukenda]

i getr all therese depresing things and all i am just 12 years old smoked to much drugs

[prismyd]

can relate to that bukenda. wanted to be dead at 11... so glad i made it to 46... just follow your heart, be yourself. get fucking angry if you have to but be careful how you channel that anger... i believe that psychosis etc is often a sign that someone is a sensitive person reacting to an insane world!!! you will look back on your life in 30 years or so and be glad that you are who you are and you won't want to change a thing about it! just make sure you look after yourself... ya hear? :0)

[inverse4]

Good advice.

[vanbag1]

Great video...

Try to get a copy of "The Center Cannot Hold" by Elyn Saks...it's an amazing autobiography by a woman who suffered psychosis all through her studies at Oxford and Yale law school. Best book I have ever read.

[gleeooo]

Great video man! i've had three episode's of psychosis also, two went untreated and were cured by hashish, but i kept smoking hashish and it came back because of this..so hash cured me once, and broke me the third time..im still on medication, cant wait to get it off it, are u off yours?

[squidboot]

not yet. i'm on the lowest dose of 2.5mg. coming off it soon i think.

all the best :)

[gleeooo]

It's great to hear you're on the mend and will soon be off the med's :) This video goes along way to helping fight the stigma that surronds pyschosis, good job!

[abustleinyourhedgero]

sounds like a scary experience man...good on ya for talking about it.

[MyThiCaL420iLLuSionS]

lol ur sexy :)

[BillyDOOM23]

This is an awesome video.

[neromustdie]

the chip remains

[Tranqx]

good post, but maybe you should sort out what you say so the video isn't 8 minutes long. lotta people dont wanna sit through that.

[wayman29]

Nice post! Love the yellow tint in your videos!