Cartmans aristocrats joke

[Dynamisoflife]

Jackasskidzify essentially stole Gilbert Gottfried's telling of this joke...

[smilymander]

i have the most awkward boner right now...

[wirgiukass]

i can't stop laughing every time i hear this joke :D

[wehavevisiondottv]

Hold on, Kyle..

[TheMaxMurder]

Hahahhaahaahahhahaha the funniest thing cartman has ever said.

[BigD2654]

Talent's a bitch.

[AngelofDeath000013]

THE ARISTOCRAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA­TS!!

[squeezeslemons]

I cracked up over everything but the punchline lol.

[underboss41]

@squeezeslemons That's the point lol

[Germany3211]

This is disgusting! Horrible tv show

[TheJulianthegreat]

@Germany3211 Your face is a horrible tv show you fucking douche

[Germany3211]

@TheJulianthegreat That makes no sense. But i dont care. God knows that it is bad

[killcrazy07]

@Germany3211 no!

[iloooooovveegoldfish]

ahh gilbert gottfried :D

[joshgaus]

Gilbert Gottfried reference

[PureBassO]

dude ......... hole on kyle ahhahahahha

[cjms1997]

I have the strangest boner right now...

[terrybuchanan1]

absolutely the BEST version of this joke EVER!

[jcoffee180]

did that air on tv or...what?

[romanvanpersie]

@jcoffee180 naaaaa, are you serious?? haha, it is from 'The Aristocrats' movie[basically a bunch of comedians telling and explaining the phenomenon that is this joke]...and probably the funniest version of the joke in the whole film. Get on it..It's hilarious.

[Konform2zoidberg]

i actually didn't get that joke until this version of it.

[Joejk137]

you just can't say anything after someone telling that joke

[UkranianMacho]

Hold on, Kyle!!

[jackasskidzify]

part 5, THE ARISTOCRATS

[Gamer4672]

@jackasskidzify ...I don't get it

[jackasskidzify]

part 4,then the dog bites the rats heads off,then the father starts fist fucking the rats in the ass,then the mother and daughter start blowing the dead rats then the rats shoot sperm on the whole family,then the father shoots sperm on the whole family,then the whole family starts fucking eachother for 5 hours in blood and pimple puss and shit and sperm and blackheads,then they all stand up and take a bowe,then the talent agent says that was impressive whats you family name,and the father says

[DaniTheMan100]

@jackasskidzify

congratulations. that's the most messed up joke i've ever seen

[jackasskidzify]

part 4,then the rats start chewing on the inside of the mother and daughters cunt and then cunt blood is gushing out of their cunts,then the father and son shove their dicks up the mother and daughters cunts then the rats start chewing on their dicks then their fucking with cunt and dick blood and pimple puss and sperm all over the place,then the daughter squeezes her blackhead onto her dads dick then the rats shit on the dads dick,then the daughter starts blowing the dad

[jackasskidzify]

part 3,then the son starts fucking his sister in the cunt and then shoots sperm all over her face,then the dog takes a tromendous shit on the floor,then the father starts fist fucking the dog in the ass hole,then the father takes a tromendous shit on the floor,then the son squeezes his pimple into his mothers cunt and then rubs his face into his mothers cunt sucking his pimple puss out of his mothers cunt,then the mother and daughter shove rats up their cunts

[jackasskidzify]

part 2,while the son is chewing on the dogs balls,then the son breaks a leg off the chair and shoves it up his sisters asshole and starts fucking her with it,then the father shoves a lamp up the daughters cunt and he starts fucking her with the lamp,then the brother attaches jumper cables to his fathers balls while the father is fucking his son in the ass while the son is licking his mothers ass hole while the mother is sucking the daughters cunt while the daughter is blowing the dog

[jackasskidzify]

heres my aristocrat joke, a family a son a daughter a mother and father and a dog walk into a talent agency and the talent agent says show me what you got, so they all take all their clothes off,then the mother and father start fucking on the floor then the brother and sister also start fucking on the floor,then the mother starts sucking her son's dick,then the father starts fist fucking the daughter on the asshole while the daughter is licking her brothers asshole

[MrWickedjay]

gilbertt version is more funnier

[k3l2p]

1:23

[k3l2p]

This joke is made even funnier with Cartman's voice.

[MrMaxret]

I love that f 'n joke nobody does it better then cartman !

[amrmd20]

DISTERBING!

[smoothcriminal7033]

If there were ever two human beings born with minds made to think of their own version of the Aristocrats joke, it would be Matt and Trey.

[xxTERRORISTxx197]

The punchline of the joke is supposed to describe how Aristocracy works as a form of government

[bellairis29]

cartman: You wanna hear a funny joke?

kyle: NO

Oh, so wise...

[megadeth1056]

If i get a hundred thumbs up i will say this in front of my church.

[thePROPAGANDHl]

@megadeth1056 no you won't

[johnnysgotaproblem89]

@megadeth1056 Make a video on it. I want to see the churchgoers' reactions.

[BASSxACE]

@megadeth1056 Please do. and video tape it.

[AJSheridan95]

@megadeth1056 you got 112 at the moment, I'm hoping for a youtube video of you saying this soon XD

[prezg1]

@megadeth1056 that would be so fucking legendary

[cratedigger89]

@megadeth1056 if you get 200 thumbs, you should do the Gilbert Gottfried version.

[wavegroupbassplayer]

@megadeth1056 start telling the joke lol

[ABRARBADGIRL]

@megadeth1056 i bent u didnt u pussy

[TheTrenchAirsoft]

@megadeth1056 You lie!

[XwaSabwryBat]

I think this is the funniest thing i have EVER heard in my hole life! writing it down and memorizing it!

[Kirinet]

THE ARISTOCRATS! *Badum pshh*

[dexter2579]

What episode is this

[jtessexpress]

hold on kyle

[tytoalba451]

We all cracked up at this, Out of shame.

[CyberChick2011]

Is it sad that I cracked up at this?

[MicK22ICE]

An Aristocrat is like somebody of nobility. A well mannered, proper person. Obviously they wouldn't go around shitting and pissing on their family. Therein lies the joke.

Get it now?

[vyvyanos]

@MicK22ICE You don't get it either...

[MicK22ICE]

@vyvyanos Explain it then, smart guy.

[MicK22ICE]

@vyvyanos I mean I understand the point of the joke is to shock you because of how disgusting it is

[sikokiller12]

LOL i dont get it either

[Roidout]

That joke has been told since the 60's, my grandpa knows that joke... He said it used to be called the sophisticates... Oh, and its spelled "disturbing"... ijs

[thearunrules]

technically, its a very old inside joke that comedians have told amongst themselves for years

[genome468]

Seriously what episode or where is this released from??

[zach99998]

@genome468 It's from a movie called "The Aristocrats," perhaps you've heard of it

[genome468]

@zach99998 so this was in the aristocrats move? i dont remember seeing this. ill have to rewatch thanks..

[ggxxslash]

I've seen every episode of South Park but I've never heard this before. What is it from? Is it like a special feature in the DVD's or something?

[AntiChristAntiFail]

It's spelled disturbing.

[Quetzalcoatlv3p14]

which episode is this from?



[wirgiukass]

@Quetzalcoatlv3p14 i think it's a deleted scene because some douchey assholes thought that it's too inappropriate and offensive. But personally i just love this joke :D

[Quetzalcoatlv3p14]

@wirgiukass Oh okay thanks. I think it's awesome too. Gilbert Gottfried tells it best :D

[imahalo123]

HAHAHAHAHAHHA

[paintballnut0]

lmfao! gilbert gottfried does same joke with a dog instead of a baby but this versions way funnier! just cuz kyle keeps interupting him

[Elestar60]

Bisturding, not Disturging

[berk420]

Disturbing, not Disterbing.

[AurynThePaladin]

OMG this is hawt! I didn't know I could cum twice in 2 minutes.

[Townofaseri]

Wow shit! :D Here's only 1 problem :D Cartman's eye dots are too big :D

[richardcadbury]

worlds worst joke

[NYCEkydd720]

if you're still laughing, after Cartman.. then you get it! I love this!

[5922239415]

Remember folks, cartman got anally probed in season 7 episode 1 :D

[satinsguard]

@5922239415 *Season 1 Episode 1

[5922239415]

@satinsguard he got anally probed again lol

[TheSampo24]

gilbert godfried ftw

[KMSigler]

What the FUUUUCK

[snackpeelskin]

WTF ?

[bluewhale18]

southpark has one sick script writer

holy shit dude

[CountryMusicFanForev]

@bluewhale18 This joke is a run-on comedy act. Look up The Aristocrats, and you find it.

[chrisstevensjunior]

what episode was this?

[hauk93]

The Aristocrats! "Ba-bom pissh!"

[ltsjack]

Wait, where is this from? I've seen every south park episode like atleast twice and I don't remember this!

[vConArtist]

@ltsjack

I think it's just a clip they made, not from an episode.

[uruglytoo]

@ltsjack it was for the documentary the aristocrats

[sinfullone216]

This is over the top disgusting. Not even a little bit funny - SICK!!!!

[TheAppleMan100]

@sinfullone216 you should hear the Gilbert Gottfried version. its way funnier and better.

[SweetZombiJesus]

@TheAppleMan100 I dunno, this one keeps it short and sweet, and Godfrey back-tracks during his telling of it which kinda breaks up the tempo. Its great, but I think this one may still be better, also because it points out how badly out-dated the aristocrats joke is.

Anyways, everyone has their different tastes.

[JoeTheLion188]

"no description available" Yeah that about covers it.

[mrboomheadshot21]

roflmao

[Greeb17]

Best version of the Aristocrats

[smoffelol]

@idontubewithyou no its not?

[danishpride1]

Aristrocrats = highest social class

[iowachamp35]

All in 2 minutes

[mytimton]

The family disliked this

[CincoDrums]

That was the best version of that joke I've ever heard.

[hungryhungrymetroid]

@CincoDrums Leave it to Trey parker to do the best one.

[99negers]

@hungryhungrymetroid

I think the Gilbert Gottfried version is better

[48tank]

Lolz

[Shino302]

I think I'm going to hell just for watching this

[Iziification1]

from witch episode is this

[totaldramster]

God Damn Cartman O_O

[theamericanmike135]

omg!!! man holy shit dude

[vhilaireatyahoo]

this IS really "disterbing"

[Obliviongatekeeper]

This video offends me. How dare Cartman say that...FILTHY word. Piss. ( counter troll is go.)

[kdog122995]

try not to laugh

[cris09071]

It wasn't in any episode. It was a short thing South Park did for the movie "Aristocrats".

[cris09071]

what episode is this i remeber seeing this once somewhere b4



[eyehategod666]

5 people don't get it

[Saninadult]

@eyehategod666 Neither do I.

[wickedphant0m]

HAHA!!! Only South Park would put 9/11 into The Aristocrats. Oh man...tooo funny.

[wyattjohnweeks]

episode?

[wazpoki]

@MichRockHop81108

its from the documentary the aristocrats well worth a look

[Sasuke006]

lol i love kyleX3 and cartman thats not a funny joke thats just wrong>.<

[MichRockHop81108]

dont bitch about it just dont watch it nancy boy

[MichRockHop81108]

@Dielandvermessen fuck you queer

[MichRockHop81108]

WHAT THE FUCK EPISODE IS THIS?????

[PotatoMan06]

What episode is it?

[dkhgr]

whats disturbing is your spelling

[Blackmist64]

i lol'd. but whats an aristocrat?

[ScatterBrainKid13]

@Blackmist64 A member of the ruling class; a very posh person

[t3rr0rtr4v15]

@Blackmist64 urbandictionary it

[SuperBIgNads]

What would you do if YOUR grandpa told you that joke

[minervacori]

It isn't from an episode. It's from a documentary so it wasn't ever meant to be in one and hasn't

[anarchy22x]

Before I watched this, I was thinking:

*make a mental note, show this to my wife later, she enjoys South Park jokes*

After I watched it, I'm now thinking:

*delete prior mental note, my wife will never watch South Park again if she sees this*

- I laughed

[spadetiger]

It's spelled disturbing. You're welcome.

[EvanENVIOUS]

@Dielandvermessen Yeah, and in a previous episode they didn't know what a resurrection or an erection were. The joke itself is easy to understand but I know a lot of people that have no idea what an aristocrat is. As long as someone knows what it is, the irony of the punchline can easily be understood.

[EvanENVIOUS]

@Dielandvermessen I thought it was pretty obvious that they don't understand it because they are eight years old and aren't likely to know what an aristocrat is.

[lolzwatzwrongwithzu]

what episode is this from?

[halloweenfan92]

@Dielandvermessen ell if you dont liek this perticuler joke why are you watching a video on it?

[halloweenfan92]

@Dielandvermessen then watch something with a punch line than if you consider this filth

[halloweenfan92]

@Dielandvermessen you to know show biz in order to undestand it

[pleeppleep]

my friends thought that the point of this video was to make fun of the joke.

[winstonsmithamm]

C-C-Cartman, I don't wanna....

[crazyjohn88cp]

hot diggity damn!

[aceshighsays]

911 was the cherry

[winstonsmithamm]

Aaaah! Aaaah! The buildings comin down! Help! Awful and hilarious at the same time.

[vytong]

This one sucks

[ReyColons619]

@vytong it's the punchline and it's awesome :P

[TheNmabey]

it was made for the aristocrats doco dumbass

[modernway91]

Wanna hear a joke? NO!

[kewlaid73]

KYLE!! WILL U HOLD ON PLZ?!?

Lol

[MoothabreatH]

what's this episode?

[alteregoash]

@MoothabreatH It's from season 5. I think episode 8. You might have to d/l a few versions though because it only aired in certain places in it's entirety.

[Eseress]

@alteregoash ..It's not from any season. It was made specifically for The Aristocrats documentary.

[MrShinanigans]

The point of the joke is to be as slanderous and anarchic as possible to the average person. The longer and more obscene the joke is, the better is is. Although there's a point to where if it gets too long it might lose its value so you have to add things along the way as Cartman did with 9/11. Gilbert Gottfried said a 9/11 joke too soon after the instance and the room was awkwardly quiet so he used the aristocrats joke to get himself out of it. There's one you can find on here it's like 7 min.

[aworldgonemad]

This clip (and the history of the joke) can be found in the movie "The Aristocrats"

[Theredtail95]

LOL, that's funny. I don't get it, but it's funny!

[lokoluli]

unbelievable..

i still can't believe that someone's head came up with this.

it's not j u s t sick, it's b e a u t i f u l....

Cartman rules!

[freude14]

Wow omg...

[isuckNewbton]

You guys wanna hear a funny joke my grandpa told me?

NO!

ok so this family walks into ....

hahahahah

[juloph]

dude

kyle, will you just hold on!

[hypnometal]

The best part:

Kyle: "I don't get it."

Cartman: "Neither do I."

:D

[mrspotato20]

@hypnometal Thats the only good part everything else is just sick!

[The5thSnow]

HA! Probably Kenny's Family Reunion...

[SHAD0WZOMBIE]

c-c-cartman...i dont wann-..k-kyle, will you hold on...please...

[NinjaDetectiveKira]

Now hold on Kyle!

[EatPeople4Fun1]

what episode is this clip from?

[GPictures13]

@EatPeople4Fun1 its not its from the movie "The Aristocrats"

[EatPeople4Fun1]

@GPictures13 ok cool, never seen the film..

[jenseneckles]

stan was like..what the hell!

[nelsonmc93]

Kyle! Will you hold on, please!?

[yamaha85number17]

i want a family like that.

[Chris49xx]

@yamaha85number17 WTF man really?