BBC Comedy: Could Jesus Walk on Custard? - QI

[BoyKissBoy]

The answer was obvious to begin with. Had it been no, it could be argued that if he could walk on water, he probably could have walked on custard too, so a negative answer would imply that he could not in fact walk on water, and that view would probably not get past the cutting table for fear of upsetting a bunch of people believing in fairy tales.

[Rubystein]

I love the little picture of Alan and Stephen..! Stephen looks so cute and daft

[DickyBowJoe]

Girl, I must be a non-newtonian fluid because I became extremely rigid when the light photons reflected off of your body and hit me.

[TuahShinguru]

USA has movies, Britain has comedians.

[TheMainEvent2k9]

i knew this answer before clicking :P

[slightlyinsaneFTW]

@TheMainEvent2k9 Yeah, so did I. It's the same for most episodes of QI, I know half the answers

[PointsofData]

Ah, QI. Asking the important, scientific questions.

[ChipArgyle]

Before you fill your swimming pool with it and your afternoon goes horribly, irretrievably awry, remember kids, it's custard, NOT Jell-O.

[adamusprime1001]

who's the guy sitting between Stephen Fry and Rob Brydon

[Reaper0]

@adamusprime1001 Rich Hall

[weatherallc05]

if i cared i would go and try it

[SpazzyMcGee1337]

There is water in custard.

[snazzymason303]

LOL!!

[NobodyLikesPaul]

braniac did this, youtube it...

[hungryman211]

@NobodyLikesPaul So did Mythbusters.

[hungryman211]

@hungryman211 I just had to do a bot-check confirmation and the key word was "dasperm".

[srivasprasad]

Oprah Winfrey -> You can walk on custard! *You* can walk on custard! YOU can walk on custard!

[sihaso]

It's a non-newtonian dilatant fluid.

Is Fry blushing? :)

[annnnnaaaaa1]

I remember watching it on brainiac years ago they filled a whole pool with custard and walked on it

[WeWillNotRockYou1]

@annnnnaaaaa1 I remember that.

What was his name? John tickle or something..

[dageezerboi]

doubt its true

[andygriff1987]

It's non-newtonian, but you'd have to run rather than walk....

[Elheru42]

@andygriff1987 Actually it is better to stomp on custard rather than run. You can traverse it quite slowly as long as you apply enough pressure.

[tavi921]

some homo moments here. so funny

[blondemario]

I love how Rich always looks very serious. I dunno why.

[blondemario]

I want the government to raise this in schools.

[whattimeisitanyway]

thats what she said

[spartanses]

Jesus can walk on custard. I can walk on custard. Anyone can walk on custard. Therefore everyone is Jesus

[TwoDrPeppers]

@spartanses Or Jesus is within all of us. Christian pwnage.

[mrhenk007]

@spartanses

4:???????

5:PROFIT!

[Callum19453]

@spartanses What i find wierd is if everyone is the son of god, then why is Jesus so special?

[Konoton01]

@spartanses If we're all god's children, what makes Jesus so special?

[Crazybenjiwoo]

@spartanses but no human is a philsoiraptor. 

[YABOYBIGNASTY]

@spartanses what about people with no legs ?

[spartanses]

@YABOYBIGNASTY born without legS? Then the custard god has spoken.

[AndrewTraceur]

@spartanses My neighbor, Jim, can walk on custard. I can walk on custard. Anyone can walk on custard. Therefore everyone is my neighbor, Jim.

[ThisIsMyHagu]

..out with the bread, out with the fish, look what i got for dessert somebody hold my shoes!

[verdicktrobin]

I always love it when Rob starts explaining something, he's always so serious about it. I also love his "No" to the audience. Classic Rob.

[speebyda]

Great, now I have little custard footprints all over the house. Tell my kids to walk on custard......

[IWannaBeTheUser]

They did the custard trick on Brainiac. John Tickle could run over it, but he sank when he stooped.

[sgtraytango]

@IWannaBeTheUser yeah Mythbusters tried it years before Brainiac along with swimming in treacle and stuff like that, pretty cool

[CoolKillerClan]

wow slip your finger in it then slap it

[MrNewkingjames]

how do you spell blasphemy?

[jadencore]

@MrNewkingjames How do you spell "Get over it"?

[x2xWhaaax7x]

i saw that braniac episode

[Tjune84]

Yeah I remember the mythbusters epi! but also the brainiac epi! so the british steal from the british now! I wonder what worries me more

[cesariojpn]

Fuck Mythbusters, they steal shit from British TV Shows.

[OktoberSunset]

You can't walk on custard. If you you make a load of gloopy shit with about 10 times more custard powder than you should be using, you can run on it, but walking is too slow and you will sink.

[ronoc9]

@OktoberSunset ....are you questioning Stephen Fry?

[JessicaCooper1234]

@OktoberSunset Out of interest, have you tried this? :')

[OktoberSunset]

@JessicaCooper1234 Not myself, but I've seen someone try it and walk too slow and sink. it was goooooey! :)

[daemonicstar]

@OktoberSunset lol I think we call running-walking fast- on custard. We don't mess with Mr Fry, he is the man! ;)

[pauseTV]

Now I want to try walking on Custard !! Haha.

[TheGhostilyGhost]

This is really the worst innuendo show XD

[GrumpyOldTuber]

I like the bit where they talked about the custard.

[Diazreta]

You can't walk on custard... trust me.

[TalesOfWar]

@Diazreta You can, sort of. You can run over it and jump on it, but walking on it may be a little too slow and you'd end up sinking into it.

[lotofhate]

@Diazreta yes you can i seen it happen

[333SoOfTheBeast333]

custard innuendos ftw!

[20meerkat]

Ah... but what happens if you drop an elephant on a vat of custurd?

[94samboy]

@20meerkat it would be eaten by the shark in it

[RobJohnB95]

dirty buggers :L

[Joooliuss]

anyone else here just randomly clicking through QI vids?

[Djezmin8]

@Joooliuss Haha, totally! :)

[SkankingMagpie]

@Joooliuss It's a great way to spend a day off work when your home sick!

[totaldreamer1]

@Joooliuss Absolutely :D

[Msoolala]

@Joooliuss I can't stop once I start ! LOL

[MJLongman]

@Joooliuss Ahh meant to vote up your comment and accidentally voted down :(

[dudemansam4189]

@Joooliuss sweet Jesus I've never seen a comment with almost 1000 likes before o_O

[D3w10n]

@Joooliuss Oh, only a thousand of us :)

[Joooliuss]

@Joooliuss 1288 thats gotta be a record :L

[IrishRhavin]

Oh wow the top comments are brilliant!

[IamMeUareYou]

@IrishRhavin rly ? lol

[Lorna662]

"Look what ive got for desert ... someone hold my shoes" I love Rob Brydon not as much as Alan but still he's awesome

[aussieosbourne]

i'm going to leave a serious comment

[Myzelfa]

Completely ignoring the more appropriate question, which is: should you walk on custard?

[pandahamlid]

@Myzelfa Yes. Yes you should.

[PhysicalsimForever]

You couldn't get away with this in the US - and at the current rate you won't be able to in the UK 25 years hence.

[The246813]

I knew the answer because of brainiac :)

[KeekoTheCornDog]

That's my new philosophy. Live life to the fullest and try to walk on as much custard as I can.

[Gaz10t]

Brainiac

[TheGuyfrance]

so why not just use custard in bullet proof vests? cheap and you can eat it xD

[rocketmagnet]

Why is the BBC advertising Sky ?

[tingyuyan12]

i made that stuff before. really fun to play with :D

[merkwin]

i reckon a mouse would be ok

[mattknow]

Water and cornstarch forms a non-newtonian fluid, much like custard. Mythbusters did it in an episode a couple of seasons ago. (Mythbusters is like a much more dangerous QI)

[pacmandem]

I swear to god if I get the 'Legend of King Arthur' advert again im gonna fucking stab my moniter.

[CiIDriveDeCoach]

@pacmandem I feel you, bro.

[jazzx251]

@pacmandem

Here's the cure:

Firefox + Adblock

No ads at all on my machine.

(although I'm using Firefox 3 and not the latest one - I hope they've not sold out on that version)

[pacmandem]

@jazzx251 Lol I have since migrated to Firefox and installed Adblock plus. (I'm now preaching the good news to every top commenter who complains about adverts).

[jazzx251]

@pacmandem

Try and keep it under the radar ....

... the danger is YouTube gets wise and wears an advert condom that even Adblock can't block. If too many people get wise, that's what they'll do.

Also get No-Script. You get to choose what web pages load for what website. Better than a virus checker (I don't use one). But you will have to give each individual site permission to load its pages the first time you go there (this one included).

Happy days!

[bp56789]

@pacmandem The free-of charge internet can only support a limited amount of users who do this. If they are too incompetent to figure it out for themselves, don't help; you are only ruining the future internet by telling everybody. So as politely as I can possibly put it: shut the fuck up.

[pacmandem]

@bp56789 You're an idiot. The itnernet isn't free-of charge. And if they eventually have the competence to compensate for their previous lack of competance i'm sure another 'competant' mind will come up with another way round ads. Keep things in perspective.

[bp56789]

@pacmandem

"The itnernet isn't free-of charge."

You're saying that you pay for Youtube? Or you think that putting a website up is free?

Your third sentence makes no sense. I was talking about the incompetence of the person you are telling (that means you 2 days ago), not the ad-servers. And I am keeping things in perspective: exponential growth has more power than you realize, i.e. the more people you tell the more people they tell etc etc.

[DeanMalenko]

@pacmandem please do that, maybe while buying a new monitor you get the idea to get an ad blocker ( that actually works )

[pacmandem]

@DeanMalenko That was three months ago; I've since migrated to FF and installed Adblock +

[paultoner]

@pacmandem aha I'm american I don't see your silly ads

[pacmandem]

@paultoner You can be smug about your ad-free youtube viewing, we'll be smug about the NHS.

Anyway, to all those that thumbed my comment: migrate to Firefox and install Adblock+.

[paultoner]

@pacmandem nah we all see ads i was just saying you see shit about king arthur whereas us US people would see shit about branding cattle. with machine guns. I'm assuming NHS is ...national healthcare system? I couldn't give a crap about that. I got insurance mofo

[pacmandem]

@paultoner LOL at "...branding cattle. with machine guns." all I can say is 'ONLY IN AMERICA'.

Btw I have a question about American healthcare; if, say, you were stabbed/beaten up and obviously had to go to hospital would you or your attackers be billled?

[paultoner]

@pacmandem huh i guess the victim has to pay. you could sue and you'd probably win, but that'd cost time + a lawyer. I was mostly trying to get a laugh at the cattle and guns part but I'm 18 and am legal to buy machine guns. Of course I can't drink legally until I'm 21. Fuck america's apparent priorities I just got myself mad lol

[pacmandem]

@paultoner I think that is soo funny - you can buy a machine gun but you cant legally have a beer. Classic. What state are you from??

[darkchild82]

@pacmandem It's better than the Pantene shampoo commercial we're getting here in India.

[P2J6O8]

Why does everything Sephen say sound sexual?

[PianoWizzy]

@P2J6O8 Simple. His voice is deep, clear, smooth, smug, and has a generally seductive tone in anything he says whether he means it or not.

I've studied his voice. XD

[P2J6O8]

@PianoWizzy Dude it was a joke comment, I did the same thing for Ryan Styles on whose line.

[PianoWizzy]

@P2J6O8 And that's how I meant it... take things lightly when the video is under the subject 'Comedy'. :P

[weirdlightsaber44]

2:00 Can do, Mr Fry

[JammyXIII]

@Kenmorfdublin

Successful troll is successful. I tip my hat to you good sir and award you ten internets.

[katelynna10000]

poor Stephen, he always loses...

"the finger slides in slowly-" *BAD THOUGHTS*

[101Phase]

they've demonstrated this on Braninac. The idea is that the faster you walk, the easier it is, but if you slow down and only apply pressure on one spot, it turns into a quick sand type mixture and you would sink

[bdf2718]

Jesus couldn't walk on custard with those holes in his feet.

[KenfromDublin]

More anti-Christian hate from the anti-Christ Zionist controlled BBC.

[Coolguyrob2006]

@KenfromDublin I don't know, I'd say the BBC is fairly anti-Zionist when it comes to the Israel-Palestine conflict anyway, and also I don't think you can judge a whole organisation on the words of 5 comedians making fun of custard.

[KenfromDublin]

@Coolguyrob2006 Oh yes you can - and this isn't an isolated example, it's all over the channel and it's coincident with Zionists occupying hugely influential positions within the BBC in recent years, I saw a clip recently that sent chills up my spine, it consisted of a priest a bishop and a nun in a night club with all kinds of narrative mockery and sexual innuendo, it was pure evil.

Remember too the BBC's virulently blasphemous and anti-Christian 'The Opera' hosted by Jerry Springer.

[Varoonmg]

@KenfromDublin You sound like an Inquisitor from the Middle Ages....

In any case, it's not that hard making fun of religions, after all they are so inherently laughable

[Kenmorfdublin]

@Varoonmg Touche, I grant you that second line ;)

[Varoonmg]

@Kenmorfdublin Simple truths dear...;)

Your pseudo is so similar to that of the Inquisitor that I kind of got confused....

"KenofDublin" and "Kenmorfdublin".....are you the same person?

[B0dysnatchers]

@KenfromDublin It sounds to me like you might be using confirmation bias. Every time you see something that supports your theory, you notice and add to your evidence. Meanwhile, all the times that something detracts from the theory (such as Louis Theroux's Ultra Zionists, where the BBC could have been pro zionist but actually were unbiased), you naturally ignore it. Most humans do this all the time and its not really a problem as long as you reevaluate your view when this is pointed out.

[Kenmorfdublin]

@B0dysnatchers Yeah yeah yeah YEAAAAH, typical run-off-at-the-mouth wannabe intellectual, I switched off your hubristic, nonsensical and moronic comment two and a half lines in like no doubt most people did reading it, you would bore the balls off a brass monkey.

[JonnoGradian]

@Kenmorfdublin So much for not making anymore replies. I probably didn't mean it in my heart anyway.

First off, I've made it quite clear that I don't hate God, I hate YOU. Hence the big letters in the word YOU. Second, God doesn't hate anyone, quite the opposite in fact. It's kind of the point of him being God.

Third, you've made it blatant that you hate Richard Thomas, referring to him as evil, and "B0dysnatchers". Well, you only have to reread your reply to see my point there...

[JonnoGradian]

@JonnoGradian I apologize for having to be as frank and condescending as I am, but I'm sure your God will forgive me. And, don't worry, I forgive you. I include in that forgiveness the hypocrisy you have shown in your comments, the obvious exploitation of God's good name, and the fact that you completely neglect to forgive those you have attacked. In other words, I forgive you for being such a terrible "Christian" as you are.

[Kenmorfdublin]

@JonnoGradian Please reply to me and not to yourself,as I almost missed this turkey of a reply, talking to yourself is the first sign of madness ;)

What a steaming pile of crap of a comment,'I'm sure your God will forgive me'? 'I forgive you'- '...neglect to forgive those you have attacked.' 'I forgive you for being such a terrible "Christian" as you are.' - are you on drugs? You should call yourself the Pope as you seem to think you have a private phoneline to this God you speak of.

[JonnoGradian]

@Kenmorfdublin Sorry mate, it's not drugs. I'm simply high on life. That and I'm rather enjoying trolling such a know-it-all God botherer such as yourself ^^

[KenfromDublin]

@JonnoGradian Well what a sad life you obviously lead, wasting your time typing self delusional megalomaniacal nonsense to some stranger whom you prefess to 'hate', so don't try to flatter yourself, the laughs on you ;)

Keep trolling and keep hating (by your own admission), that's all your good for. ;)

[JonnoGradian]

@KenfromDublin Yeahhh, I guess I'll stop... Though frankly I've only been wasting thirty-odd seconds of each day on you. The rest of that is spent on uni. I just got bored one evening and decided to join an argument, which is technically becoming something I despise in acting like a cantankerous tool... That and I happen to adore the Jerry Springer Opera...

[JonnoGradian]

@KenfromDublin Just read the 21 hours ago post with you calling me a hypocrite for replying. I did acknowledge that, you know...

but now let's be honest, you can't deny that you did deliberately start a political/religious argument, which has been the cause of most war and chaos for all of history. I'm not saying you're trying to start a war, but it's that and these childish bitchfights which have me /usually. steering clear or even trying to prevent even the mention of this stuff.

[JonnoGradian]

@KenfromDublin and yes, I know I'm going against everything I've been saying, but this is the mature me speaking.

So yeah, I'm sorry for any offense/upset/mereboredom that I've been causing.

Now I'm just going to enjoy this video for what it is, an amusing correlation between walking on custard and Christ walking on water, and go back to (trying) to make witticisms/bad puns based on a videos content.

[Telfordism]

@JonnoGradian Throw in the towel you fucking noob.

[JonnoGradian]

@Telfordism ...Dude, read the comment, I did give in. I'm done.

[Kenmorfdublin]

@JonnoGradian "... I'll probably read, but I won't reply." - what a hypocrite you are for all to see.

I was being rhetorical when stating that God - if He exists - 'probably hates you', try and keep up.

I don't know you so unlike you -re me- I don't have any feelings of hatred for you whatsoever, what a wasteful negative state of mind, it causes so much trouble, mayhem and war in the world, and I hope you are proud of yourself for indulging in it.

I still feel pity for you however.

[JonnoGradian]

@KenfromDublin God, I hate you... And bear in mind I meant YOU in that sentence, not God. So please don't bother sending your jih- *cough* crusades after me. Also, in case you do, this is a one off comment, so don't bother trying to "religiousargument" me, I'll probably read, but I won't reply.

[Kenmorfdublin]

@JonnoGradian God probably hates you too, so you are to be pitied.

I don't hate anyone, I thank you for that virtue, God ;)

[TheWantboobs]

@KenfromDublin HAHAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH­A, man you stupid

[yeshuahfullofit]

Jesus could indeed walk on custard, however, being orthodox, he prefered pudding.

[EuskaltelEuskadi]

ahh gotta love rob brydon XD

[CurtisFTM]

Actually I saw this on Brainiac. You can run on custard but you cannot walk on custard.

[Deadbeatloser22]

@CurtisFTM They actually used a clip from that segment for this.

[LittleCazzy]

Watching this episode on Dave, I love it, Stephen Fry's sexual innuendo are the best

[theanimallover92]

this sounds so wrong but its so right! :D

[maldicientin]

Of course he could you dummies!!! It's called omnipotence. Look it over.

[Sexandtoast]

@maldicientin

Nah, Jesus was just a prophet of the most high. Look it over.

[ZackTheGopher]

@Sexandtoast Nope, he's «just» the Son of God mate!

[bjam89]

@ZackTheGopher it changes on what your faith is

[plugindave]

@Sexandtoast Nah, Jesus was just the world's greatest self publicist

[leprechaun192]

from to start to 18 seconds is just genius. I love that guy

[Xanatos712]

How could Jesus walk on liquid? He's got holes in his feet!

[Monaroyalovely]

@Xanatos712 He has holes in his feet?!!

[TheSuzberry]

Only Stephen Fry could make a non-Newtonian fluid sound obscene. You gotta love a guy like that.

[lytrigian]

@TheSuzberry Well.. most non-Newtonian fluids *are* sorta obscene. Try making one someday (other than custard) and see how it behaves.

It... oozes.

[giouk1]

oh boy....here we go.....

[cat0the0cat]

It would be more like a run not walking.

[p3rs0nan0ngrata]

Powdered custard, not creme anglaise.

[ONLYUSERIOTSHIELD]

Everyone can walk on custard -.-

[AnnatarYoung]

Haha, I love when Stephen's euphemisms come up!

[TheBluberryPi]

@AnnatarYoung *WINK* I see what you did there! (Maybe.)

[jaygirl942]

Poor Stephen...He soooo didn't mean to say that....

[hifromneptune]

"Children all over the country will now be putting their hamsters in bowls of custard."

[m0ngbwalu]

True dat ... get some cornflour, mix with water to a putty consistency: squeeze it and it acts like a solid, let it go, and it immediately "melts" to become a liquid. Exactly the same as a penis.

[SuperGoldenPony]

@m0ngbwalu hahahahaha u made my night

[martybow1]

@m0ngbwalu I LOVE cornflour!

Everytime I make gravy, I make sure I play with the cornflour! :)

LOVE x

[Travmapunk]

@m0ngbwalu I was laughing so hard at your comment(like LOL'ed literally) that i farted! And than i smelled it and it smelled of... too much details?

[iBoyzification]

1:10 to 1:33 hahahaha *thats what she said*

[LaurenLovesTimmyTime]

QI is the best! Its amazing, it's epic!

[chickenruler]

If John Tickle can walk on custard, ANYONE CAN!

[JanineRobin]

Just as a point of reference, i did actually fill my bath up with custard this evening and tested the theory.

I sank and my vole drowned.

[cheesecake114]

@JanineRobin You have to put alot of pressure on it and be quick, you could run accross it but if you just stay there then obviously you'd sink.

[cesariojpn]

I knew already that Custard is a Non-Newtonian fluid.

[SmpFilmsFan14]

I WILL STEPHEN! Watch out morrisons....I'm about to buy a boat load of custard >:3