John Pinette: Chinese Buffet

[DULGAR333]

NO BUFFET!!!! NO BUFFET FOR YOU !! HAHAHA

[DULGAR333]

you go john!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[CurryCobra]

Love chinese buffets.... stayed for 2 hours once.

[Chanman34561]

omg friggen hilarious.

[thginthgin]

Does anyone have the show where he talked about Nyquil? I have been looking for it and haven't seen it anywhere

[Teddy8084]

i just had the worst experience with a pot cookie, and a chinese buffett.... never again

[Intimidator629]

OMG I cant believe i ate that Chow Mei... Hey look they brought eggrolls! LMAO

[ohmah70]

LMAO ARA CART

[ghostpig80]

Eat Vegebul! Eat Brokriii!!

[matthewVancouver]

what a funny sob'

[tbb033]

28 person want him go now!

[superspyro3000]

U HEAR FOR OWAH!! XDD

[MidnightHatstand101]

His Chinese imitation is HILARIOUS XD ROFLCOPTER

[EricW1063]

I so want Chinese now. Lol.

[KaptaanPakistan]

PLEASE DONATE SOME FOOD TO PAKISTAN.

[leekai0]

Chinese are like that. I am Chinese too. I have also had the same experience as he in a Chinese buffet. And they did say, "why is he still here?" And they kept staring at me. Yeah, I was there for 2 hours.

[thatswhatisaidyeah]

MSG coma LOL!

[gotmadskilz]

No Buffet, We dry clean now! LOL!!!

[deathknight2300]

@gotmadskilz

I do your jacket, ready friday. Now go! You cause trouble!

[KennyCybertron]

I met John here in Tampa during filming of the movie "Punisher" and at the Tampa Improv...he is a class act, very humble and naturally funny. I do stand-up comedy and I hope to do as well as him one day. And YES, I do luve chinese buffets....."You use prate NOT tray"....no put chair up to buffet !!! timeless :)

[OjaiRoy]

"Oh my God I can't believe I ate all that chow may hey look they brought egg rolls!"

[deathknight2300]

@OjaiRoy

Two please!

[GeneralKenobiSIYE]

What happened to "You eat rrike a kirra whale!"

[deathknight2300]

@GeneralKenobiSIYE

he like a freh wilwey Freh wilwey!

...aw scuew it, we go see die hard with a vengence.

[spongebob2405]

Noooo Buffet just kills me.

[silentsniperrr]

NOH BUFFET! BUFFET NA FO YOU! YOU ORDAR ARA CART!

[GdoubleWB]

Best part: I GIVE HIM ENOUGH MSG KILL AN ELEPHANT! HE STILL KEEP GOING! YOU CAN'T STOP HEEM! YOU GO NOOOW!!! YOU HERE FOUR HOUR! Why you here four hour? Why you have sparerib, you so beeg! Eat vegetabre! Eat broccri! You scare my wife! YOU GO NOOOW!!!

Awesome

[samantha34ize]

alot of cowboy ofensive linemen arent allow in cetain buffet places

[GdoubleWB]

I FEED HIM ENOUGH MSG KILL AN ELEPHANT!!! Roflmao

[XTwizTiDKitTeNx]

Lmao u scare mah wof

[ferretsrcrunchy]

SIGN SAY ALL YOU CAN EAT, NOT YOU EAT ALL.

[TeamBelmont91]

Upload the whole album....?

[davesseasonal06]

my brother (not fat, just tall) and me and my dad went to a buffet. after his like 5th plate my dad said this and i almost died. lol i think he may have offended some people

[DJonX7]

LOOK AT ALL THE MSG!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[soleniak]

you be here 4 hour..you go now!.....awesome.

[Zironyxcyx]

you no come here anymore

[CinosTheHedgehog2000]

you scare my wife

[MusicVideoJudge1]

We closed, No buffet here, we dry clean now.

[Knightmare9513]

You been here 4 hour!

[therockstar8989]

I want the noodel wook ;P <3

[CultureClasher]

12 people scared the owner's wife!

You go now!

[ElectrikChick98]

I thought it used to be " YOU GO HOME NOW YOU EAT TOO MUCH"

[TenouHaruka0]

brocorri. My favorite vegetaburr!

[shayexu10]

Get Pinyin Books from pinyin.com

[helpxs]

NO BUFFET, BUFFET NOT FOR YOU!!!!!!!!!!!!

[dieselscience]

"YOU order a ra cahr..."

[Killzone0001]

Lmfao! :)

[AlllamericanQB]

Blue Collar Radio, Sirius 103 &XM 148. = ]

[a9saldivar]

11 dont like chinese food

[fuckingsob]

In almost his first bit he did I was actually watching back in the day on Bud Freemans evening at the improv. He said "You eat like great killer whale". Funniest part, and he doesn't do it anymore.

[Youllneverquit]

and then i jizzed in my pants...

[lenyo123]

John does one of the best stand up acts you will ever see.

[garycalgary]

one time i had buffet.  I paid and walked outside. I got up too fast. I threw up a lot. An hour later I was hungry

lol

[RafLay]

i give enough msg to kill elephant! he still keep going! you can't stop him!

[annoyingryan1220419]

YOU HERE FOUR HOUR

[Sooklez]

This is the original skit I heard from my friend. Freaking hilarious. I wish he did more work tho! This CD is the only skits I ever hear him do! Hes awesome! Thanks for posting!

[Drdancemajor100]

LOL

[VvPoHvV]

If this is the original Chinese Buffet bit why are their cheers of recognition when he mentions key lines, hmm?

[biggphartX]

I want chinese food now!!!

[borntoworship2006]

That's right aznbutteredtaost. We all think fat people and Chinese are funny because we're all racist! DUH!!! Lighten up or shut up!!!

[aznbutteredtoast]

pretty damn racist

[lighthouse44]

Those pictures of the buffet make me immediately hungry for chinese food. Mmmmmmmmmm!

[firefatkid]

lol i had to go get some after i watched this

[d4seasons]

yeh, me too. i eat @ Chinese food buffets about once a month. it's more economical & filling. lastly vanilla ice cream with all the toppings with fortune cookies. by the way i'm Chinese.****

[hurricanesofhell]

lol YOU GGOO NOOWW!!!

[ultrakool]

so about the seventh or eighth time...haw haw

[WinVistaUser2]

"We dry clean now."

YOU GO NOW!!!!!!!!!

My dad went to a chinese buffet, and my dad was fucking pissed off at the manager, and the manager said that my dad was eating too much. I went to a Japanese Steakhouse, the best dang food.

[ohmah70]

i go to these chinese buffet's and they want you in and out as fast as they can get you.....i love driving them nuts by going to the bathroon for days when i'm almost done(then eat more),so they think i dined and ditched,then when i finally come out,they are all looking at me like oh,there he is.

[Ian6178]

YOU GO NOW

[deathknight2300]

@Ian6178

YOU HERE FOUR HOUR!

[JosefScarletteMUA]

YOU SCARE MY WIFE!!!

Lmao!!

[mythepoeia]

THIS is the absolute BEST!!!!!

[icyhell1]

anybody know what video he talks about the japanese sushi buffet ? with the seal and angry japanese chef

[pucksprattle]

It's from the same CD, "Show Me the Buffet." It comes after the Chinese buffet bit.

[OnThatPowder]

i love china buffet.....lots of shrimp & chicken

[american2015]

You been here 4 hour!? Why you here 4 hour!?

[steelersrawsome]

you scare my wife!!!!! LOL!

[AutisticPersona]

I actually sent this to my Dad and he laughed his ass off!

[1o2o3e]

chinese food make me tire after eatting it.....

[Obelisk2290]

yuu be hea fo houaw

[kkcrazy30]

this is funny. relates to me in some way.

[tyiselevette]

omg this is soooo funny

[joeymasong]

rowdy piper didnt like chinese buffets

[Trollingwithmyhomies]

@joeymasong rowdy piper was a faggot with erectile dysfunction hope he's dead by now

[gamingguy90]

9999 view get!

[Chrispat8]

I can't believe the whole--Hey look they brought egg roles!

[WinVistaUser2]

two, please.

[person4fun]

This makes me want Chinese food...>.>

"I give him enough MSG kill an elephant!!!"

[10hight]

@person4fun he still keeps going you can't stop him! You go now!!!!!!!

[bladebomb]

no buffet, son of a bitch!

[SanJoseSharksRULE101]

cose i got the audiobook from itunes show me the buffet... im listening to it rite now... after the grand opening part...

[SanJoseSharksRULE101]

oh ok... im 13... but why doesnt it say "son of a bitch!" i thot that was part of it... im glad it doesnt but i was just wondering...

[pucksprattle]

He's changed this comedy bit slightly over the years. I know that in a later version, possibly from "I'm Starvin'!", he says "Son of a bitch still here!"

[SanJoseSharksRULE101]

nevermind you dont have to tell me... i guess that would be wierd... i probably wouldnt tell anyone either... sorry about that...

[SanJoseSharksRULE101]

eat vegtable! eat brocowee! you scare my wife!

how old are you? cuz i need to know if i can say somthing or not...

[pucksprattle]

Huh? I'm 36.

[SanJoseSharksRULE101]

i give him enough msg kill an elephant! he keep going! you cant stop him! lol

[pucksprattle]

...you no come here anymo!

[SanJoseSharksRULE101]

ya... i let my friends listen to it before school and we couldnt stop laughing...

[pucksprattle]

YOU GO NOW!

[SanJoseSharksRULE101]

i was looking for the cd version of this bit... i love this guy... thanks for putting it up...

[pucksprattle]

This seems to be the "full" version. In later stand-up routines he's shortened the Chinese buffet bit.