Dane Cook - Sneeze

[KeeseanS]

THUMBS UP IF YOU TRIED SPRAYING IT HALF WAY!

[Miister00]

this vid is 9:11 ?

[Delena444]

LOL

[arnaldoissuperhot]

i actuall told an Atheist "Nothing happens after you die" when they sneezed, they were like OMG HAHAHAHAHA XDDDD

[KaraNetics]

thumbs up if you googled ''snarky''

[MrPotatoSack177]

FUUUH! LOL

[MonicaChan14]

LMAO

[MamaTurtle11]

HI-LA-RI-OUS

[knigge27]

omg! i reaaaally wanna try turnning it halfway!!! :D just to see what happens :D

[Penguin11Trashman]

from now on i will say 'Snarky' xD

[InjectMorphineIntoMe]

This ending is so clever! :)

[Delena444]

Windextor cleaned 13 souls.

[icykoolbabygirl123]

@Delena444 14 now =]

[darydude9]

its real it means like testing a person or som shit

[nenekaguya2]

Are people... really questioning snarky being a word? .-. what have we come to?

[jscottssf1]

just googled that shit ! snarky

[jjismyname98]

Clusterfuck!

[Myanonymouslara]

snarky is a word! cool my word of the day!

[Smuuuuuexi20]

gonna pass down these stories down to my children lol

[ermilo100]

he has a fuckin point

[MetalHearts229]

13 people missed the spot with the windex laser mode.

[5555deadman]

I AM WINDEXTOR I WILL CLEAN YOUR SOUL HAHAHAHAHAHA

[unknownfullofsecrets]

my brother is an ath- never mind......but its still funny XDDDDDD

[CityGirl2699]

He gets so sidetracked. xDD

[deathmeanstolive]

enjoying his treeness lololololololol

[ThePunkWolfs]

A word that should be googled to find the definition as per direction from Dane Cook. It means short tempered or irritable.

"He was being very snarky with me. Yeah, snarky. Its a word, google it." -Dane Cook

[horsel0v3rl01]

BAHAHAHAHA

[lilyfire2030]

dude i googled snarkey and i came to a page and the sentence was what dane cook said i was holy shit it is a word!

[JustinxFailJprox]

13 people use lazer mode (:

[drock1killedyou]

snark·y [ snrkee ]

1.sarcastic: sarcastically critical or mocking and malicious

[gabbygurloya]

My friend doesn't believe in god and i say " god Bless you " and she ALWAYS says "Thank you " without rolling her eyes or anything.

[sean44048]

Nugety Clusterfucks!

[TheElam1234]

@MusicLoveDance890 Haha me too

[JenniferAShilrley]

I AM WINDEXDOR!

[Narutoxhinatahugs]

omG!!!! this is one of my favorite ones of all the Dane Cook jokes! I literally die every time i hear it XD

[MichaelTMxD]

@djmykeypm

[Meleenaca]

lol this is not about what religion is right, its about not being a dick bout what you believe.

so stop fighting and grow up

[ninjamooseofthemist]

Somebody go make a candy called milk chocolate cluster fuck

[RedSquarrel666]

On this video people always argue over Atheism and Christianity, personally, Christianity in theory doesn't work.

No.1 Anyone could write the bible

No.2 An invisible character who controls our lives-PERVERT! kidding

No.3 Anyone seen any miracles lately? Don't think so.

But, I am an Atheist, I don't care about this video, I think it's funny, if someone said: God Bless You, I would just, oh thanks. Not:

Oh well I'm an Atheist. Jeez...

[RockingGeniusJeff]

@RedSquarrel666 you're contributing to the bigotry and ignorance of this debate

keep that shiz to yourself, and if you replied that way if i said "bless you" i'd hit you in the face

i respect your beliefs, but replying that way is rude.

[RedHeadSnowflake]

@RedSquarrel666

well.. I understand what your saying..

1. true.. it might've been a lot of creeps writing shit down.

2. some of those creeps saw him (i've felt his presence o.e....pervert-ish yea)

3. there has been miracles tho.

But, I am Christian. This video makes me laugh :) If I said "God Bless You" I would hope you'd say "thanks" and not sarcastically... But "oh, i'm an atheist." haha..ya.. ._. dont do that.

[saturdayx101]

12 people are atheists

[aakk95]

iv had that happen

[DevinSterlingEdward]

I googled snarky, its real.

[DevinSterlingEdward]

4:43 ROTFFLMFAO!!!

[TheIhatekatyperry]

americans dont know how to be funny

[DarkFatalisSlayer]

there was no warning with your hand like you're going to turn into a werewolf or something."Something's happening to me.. augh...."

[TrueGamer181]

lol at Windextor!

[KristyPooh13]

Print the Bible on him. Ultimante punishment.

[Wolfzwhisper]

BOOSH SCHOOLED!! PRINT THE FUCKIN BIBLE ON HIM!!!

[erikboi777]

LOL "Print the bible on him" your funny

[TheDES2000]

DANE IS HOT AAND THATS COMIN FROM A 10 YEAR OLD AND IM 10 PWAN

[trinibear14]

i am winderxtor!! i will clean your soul!!

[ccmanmonc]

i believe in re-incarnation 

[awesomealex121]

I LUV YOU DANE COOK!!!

[Redbullinator2000]

hit 8 repeatedly to see Dane headbang. :D

[Hippychic818]

Dane Cook at his best.

[mossclaw55]

"once hes paper, YA PRINT THE BIBLE ON HIM!!"xDDD

[bigphil088]

@mossclaw55 best part! haha

[CorruptSoul3219]

Im an athiest but thank god im not "snarky" about it. And yes i thank god even though im an athiest.

[MoteenProtein]

You print the bible on him! :))

[cathy89able]

10 people don't know how to cover their fucking mouth.

[twilighaholic05]

Ok so I'm listening to *Dane Cook*

&+ he goes in his skit The Athiest,

"Yea, snarky. It's a word. Google that sh●t."

So, yea, I did.

An Urban Dictionary page came up.

This is what it said:

snarky- A word that should be googled to find the definition as per direction from Dane Cook. It means short tempered or irritable.

"He was being very snarky with me. Yeah, snarky. Its a word, google it." -Dane Cook

[theglorpy]

filled with peanuts and fuck. nougatey fuck!

[lolagirl57]

"I AM WINDEX-TOR I WILL CLEAN YOUR SOUL!!!!"

i laughed so hard xD

[TheNightreaper626]

@MusicLoveDance890 i did too!!! :DDD

[gewelfool9]

10 people don't like nugety fuck.

[TheDrakeMoon]

when i died, and went to heaven, i saw GOD. he sneezed. i didn't know what to say.

[yukijanae]

i'm scared of my windex now....

[funnyelf1]

Urban dictionary term of snarky - A word that should be googled to find the definition as per direction from Dane Cook. It means short tempered or irritable.

[TheDragonLake]

and then they print the bible on him! XD best line ever!

[ryansavio99]

dane should make 1 of How hard it is to open simple things!

[SenkiroWolf]

Nine people had nothing happen when they died.

[ohihihilovestwilight]

man i always watch this and im a boy using my sis acount

[elementaladmin123]

Which was God bless you but it kinda sounded like cover your fuckin' mouth hahahahaha!

[jodoman9469]

9 people dident google snarky

[MegaPrinnyDood]

cluster fuck

[SenkiroWolf]

Nine people turned that shit half way.

[madasacat4]

@SenkiroWolf I did, but sadly nothing happened :(

[TheNightreaper626]

@SenkiroWolf now its 10!!!

[SenkiroWolf]

@TheNightreaper626 Thank you!!! XD

[TheNightreaper626]

@SenkiroWolf i loled hehehe

i got a fb if u have one..... look me up

'donovan augustine immel'

[TheNightreaper626]

@SenkiroWolf u r very welcome my dear

[roflkids101]

So. . . He only puts a space every few words?

[PeterbiltEmzie]

I love the story line at the end

[headupbuttdown]

Boo nine people who didnt like this. i hope you turn into a tree

[deziboy5150]

im just a messenger for the big guns upstairs lol dis guy is pretty funny

[deziboy5150]

cluster fuck, thats not a candy bar ill tell ya that right now! lol

[ariannaxmeow]

*googles snakry*

[ariannaxmeow]

I AM WINDEXTOR

[MegaGorillazFanGirl]

I tried the Windex, and the nozzle popped off, bounced of the counter, and hit me. DON'T DO IT.

[jetsaini]

@MegaGorillazFanGirl

lmaoooo

[MrsSunshineVamp]

love his special effects xD

[xRaZorSHoTzx]

He just cocked and FWAAAAAHHHHH!!!!! xD Best part.

[bcronce16]

9 people are atheist

[Fearonaris1]

...

-turns the Windex nozzel halfway- >3

[SageLorrain]

WINDEX!!!

[CantHoldDownLeeFan13]

FFWWAAAHHH!!!! ...what kinda sneeze IS that??

[MrJderoche]

But it kinda sounded like cover your fuckin mouth....in cognetto....LMAO

[SourLifeSaver]

LOL windextor XD

[o0EmoMushroom0o]

I'm an atheist, and I love this. Dane Cook is too funny! <3 (':

[bladeslash4]

looks like a Sneeze can be the best ice braker :P

[issjoanax3]

8 people are atheist and almost died with the idea of having the bible printed on them.

[josiahtacoo]

all u ppl who dont like this go fuck ur self u self thinker!

[geekytuba13]

Snark-y : Adjective: (of a person, words, or a mood) Critical; cutting; testy

[AliceEnma]

genius....that's all i can say.

[ColdToxic1]

3:10 - 3:20 FUCKING FUNNY

[ColdToxic1]

3:10 - 3:20 is fucking funny

[karate4ev1]

I'm an atheist but I don't make a big deal about it when someone says god bless you

[Ultan89]

Something's happening to me, Gwaaaaaaaah

[randomnidiot]

OMG! Epic!

I love Dane Cook like 80 times more than I did 10 minutes ago. xD

[Bamboohurts93]

First time watching Dane Cook and I have to say that a devil truly exists if that man is famous....he's so unfunny i cried...

[XxSweetPassionxX]

@Bamboohurts93 Wtf. |: 

[rainstar999]

i want a cluster fuck bar O.o

[personwhoiscool7]

thumbs up if you googled snarky

[lilemofox]

does anyone els have the urge to put a windex bottle on halfway now?

[AADHW]

such an amazin punchline!

[timoros6sic6]

the end is pure epic!

[olivermeesha]

I AM WINDEXTOR!!! HA HA HA I WILL CLEAN YOUR SOUL

[LatiasSaphira]

@olivermeesha I did that in my Math class; the teacher uses Windex. :'D

No one got it, though. ;-;

[ResultofmyBoredom]

I go to catholic school so it's church every week. I feel like such a nerd because when he said "lift up your hearts" I actually finished the line involuntarily. I'm like "We lift them up to the Lord. Let us give thanks to the lord our God it is right to give thanks and praise" Then I'm like "what the fuck am i saying?"

[burento4]

lol awsome!! xD

Dane cook 1 - Atheist 0

[sarahbabydoll11]

he is like the Beatles of comedy ahha hes freaking endless!

[Bamboohurts93]

@sarahbabydoll11 You should get hanged for saying that

[rasenchidori1]

Once he's paper we print the bible on him. LOL!!!! XD

[hunterbob21]

but i want a milk chocolate clusterfuck :(

[TheChocolateJohnson]

I put the windex on halfway. A fuckin atheist came out.

[chuddyluv]

AHAHAHAHA omg the ending....ROTFL

[peroxidal]

going to see him on the 16th at intrust bank arena

[RoseofSithis96]

cluster fuck!!

[yoshi45]

i googled snarky

[MrChEcKeReDKiD]

Haha the end was hilarious...

[wowdude12able]

i say "Blesh you" when ppl sneeze

[Gaaraloverr1]

Don't you just love how he gets off topic so often? XD I do!

[MegaUnknown43]

PHAUUUUUUU! LOL!!!!

[DogsHelpAndSupport]

1:46 "Nothin, He just cocked and phauuuuuu!!!!" Lol!

[kc958]

Next time I sneeze I'm gonna do the robot

[NinjaEastaBunni]

LOL That was genius;)

[StaraziaSelin66]

i think it was a bit rude that dane was making fun of the guy's beliefs. i mean, its his beliefs. but i did like the punch line with the drunk guy XD

[Tylendal242]

@StaraziaSelin66 As a die hard atheist, I must say... I saw nothing but good, entertaining comedy here. Relax a little.

[inuBuddiesBC]

LMAO at 1:13 <3

[PrincessBIackheart]

OMG Id luv to be his space bar on his keyboard ;D <33333

[Skighify]

@PrincessBIackheart You want to be head-butted? O_o

[jumping4free]

God bless you dane... you need help.. but dang your funny as all get out

[DeathNoteOwnerTooBe]

he told you not to! I am Windertoll, I will clean your soul. Ahahaha

[jcarrion6800]

as soon as u said to check it up i checked it up XD and it actually is a word

[princehillanbrand9]

Racist. Even if he was an atheist, you could've started off nicer. Jesus, Dane sucks now.

[HoneyBFly12345]

@princehillanbrand9 Yep, you can see how much he sucks by the number of people on that audience.

[inuBuddiesBC]

@HoneyBFly12345 wtf are you talking about? there are probably millions of people in that one room. id like to see you do what he does EVERY DAY. and if u dont like him why are you even on this video? go watch sumthing that U want to watch and let us watch what WE want to watch.

[HoneyBFly12345]

@inuBuddiesBC Hum, yeah... You failed. I was being sarcastic. Of course I know there's millions of people in that audience, I'm not that stupid, I can see those millions of people in the video.

[inuBuddiesBC]

@HoneyBFly12345 and how does that make me a fail? look at you going on this video just to waste your time and write sarcastic remarks on youtube? its not like i can tell you're being sarcastic when you TYPE.

[HoneyBFly12345]

@inuBuddiesBC It was easy to tell I was being sarcastic! I'M NOT BLIND! I can see the audience! Geez! How old are you? O.O

[Zaknafeined]

Haha I love the end to this!

[YaoiIsLove89]

LOL!! I'm Agnostic but when someone says 'God Bless you' i just say thank you...simplest answer.

[MitsukiSky]

"Uh....... when you're dying nothing happens." XDD LMFAOO

[ChrisAwesome1994]

I am Windextor! I will clean your soul!!!!!!!! *Thinks to self* "... That... That doesn't seem too bad..."

[rire25]

" Float over here, check this out! "

ahahah!! XD

[xanabananax7692]

fucking hilarious

[Lochie59]

i had to ty the windex thing

[yusefdoodie]

I AM WINDEXTOR

[Roadrider20]

Oh WOW! I liked the very end!

[kaylathecoolest]

lol i'd love to see a ghost tht looks like dane cook pop out of my windex :D

[monsterknows]

@kaylathecoolest me too

[kaylathecoolest]

@monsterknows hahahahah!!!!! who wuldnt???

[monsterknows]

@kaylathecoolest people who hate dane cook

[kaylathecoolest]

@monsterknows oh....well i guess thts true! haha uve got a point hahahah!! :3

[policebass3913]

I LOVE DANE COOK!! <33333

[brianafouts]

i love Dane Cook! i want to be like him haha