My back doctor recently told me I'd never walk without a cane for the rest of my life. Said my back's totally fucked. He looked at me funny when I started laughing as I thought of this. Thanks, Billy!
No one with any sense gives a flying fuck about the babies whining and crying about using strong language. Do not defend yourself to these people, don't validate their existence in that way. The next time you need a response to one of these halfwits use mine; FUCK OFF. It's short sweet to the point and guaranteed to elicit the desired response.
LMAO I'm a medical student and I'd love to be THAT doctor lol. In an ideal world I could just give it to my patients straight up, no medical jargon involved...and all of my diagnoses consisting of variations of the word "fuck."
HEY GUYS!! I'm a New Zealand comedian and my dream is to have a COMEDY TV PROGRAM to make people laugh their asses off and to help other up-and-coming comedians into the spotlight. i HAVE made a lot of videos that I REALLY WANT YOU TO CHECK OUT, so PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE check them out and subscribe!! Thank you xo
its all about context, watch that fucking car isn't offensive if you're not in the car. However I want to f****r you're mother is incredibly offensive and it ain't a bad word normally. Like wow look at my fingers
Fuck is a fantastic word, the only difference between being classy and being yob, is knowing when to use it, in the right circumstances fuck, and in fact all sware words, are awesome little things, that add humor and emphasis to stuff when used properly. People who sware all the time kind of ruin them though. But Billy says, there is no english equivilant for FUCK OFF! =)
I always thought FUCK was something from the old England days when soldiers were lacking men, they'd have to go home and tell their wives that they were urged to bare more sons for their King. And their country.
So it was basically Fornication Under Command of King.
The word FUCK came from the British Navy shorthand for those seamen who where charged (after shore leave) with...going with local loose ladies. The risk of infection was deemed to be a result of...For Unlawful Carnal Knowledge.
A FUCKING funnny, FUCKING very FUCKING talented ,and FUCKING very FUCKING interesting FUCKING chap! I FUCKING love most of the material that this FUCKING funny FUCKER has ever FUCKING done! FUCKING love you. You FUCKING mega FUCKING star !!Respect William
@RosesofWillows By the same token I hear that people with rods up their arses live in the US. I have never met people that were easier to offend than there. They go out of their way to tell you that they don't like curse words, which has never ever happened to me before.
Nobody can express themselves quite like the Irish and the Scots :D.
@TrueRahf oh yeah! I'll admit, i'm one of those people that don't care for curse words, but I'm used to it. Especially with my co-workers; they're more relaxed when speaking amongst themselves. I also don't mind it in Billy's case; a cultural thing he must have grown up with.
And you're right, it's very expressive!! :D "The doctor says 'His heart's fucked' "...Well alright, it paints clearer picture than just 'He has a bad heart.' LOL xD
Who the fuck cares about "if you use bad language"?? They're just fucking WORDS. World as we know it is going to shit, and people worry about bad language :P
The word "fuck" is so over used that it has lost its shock value. A Queensland court recently decided that calling a police constanble a "prick" was NOT offensive. I believe that there is really only one true pronanity that gets everybody..it starts with a "c" and rhymes with "bunt"
Ok, my little brother has a serious allergy problem that has screwed up his nasal passages. I took him to the doctor, and sat in the room as the doctor said, and this is no word of a lie, "I'm sorry to say son, but your nose is well and truly fucked." So it does actually happen.
I come from a whole team of comedians [some think they are, too, but not], and to be absolutely fair the word "fuck" is only used in its proper text. If you check Wickipedia, I'm sure the word and meaning according to them would be found.
Knowing someone like Billy Connelly, Roy "Chubby" Brown or Dave Chapelle, that would be expected from their language and behaviour. All three are great, even if they do use excessive bad language.
Tellin' it like it fuckin' is!! never mind the..well...he's no' that good... or...we're very worried...or even...he's in intensive care! The Scottish tradition states " tell it like it fuckin' is!" - His heart's fucked! lolol
god theres a big argument on the word fuck..i thought it was hilariuos the way he put it...and i do think its an offensive word if you say it to someone angrily...and its just not offensive wen ur talking aboout something not meant to be angry like "that sun is fucking hot" to me seems like a comment about the sun ...being fucking hot.....cause it is...especially a very hot sun... =D so yea. its a weird word (: lol xxxxx
@lainnie25 I also love Billy and his attitude to the words, " FUCK OFF"! There's nothing else like it in the World. It describes just what the **** you want and you effing want it to happen NOW!
Could you check out my channel, where you'll find my profile pic of my American number plate tattoo that I made up myself. It makes the F. OFF point. :o)
To be fair, I think SHARONUKN18 was just analyzing Billy's gag. And how the usage of 'fuck' can be equally side splitting funny, but on the other offensive. In this case SHARONUKN18 is right, people use 'fuck' in this context without meaning to be offensive, yet it's bloody funny.
Sounds to me Rock5501 your reading into this comment too much...or else you have too much time on your hands...i was just "commenting" by the by...i have lived here in the US for 30 years, and i have been asked on many occasions why us British use the word fuck alot..so yes maybe i was defending the British language, so the FUCK what.Now fuck off...
But thats typical of how we talk...right now my poor old mums legs are fucked...and i feel fucked off. There is something about us British with that word, its totally not meant to offend anybody.
i am british aswell. but in the video, it doesnt offend anyone. so then you defend british language, and that it offended someone, when it didnt. so it seemed pointless.
Laughing to the point of tears now... Oh man...
yobhsiFehT 1 day ago
lol defuckulator
lewallen86 5 days ago
Nothing like being honest.
Leowen2 1 week ago
@raniplaut1 its the "was it something i said" DVD from his australian show
BJEful 1 week ago
doctor of medicine.- one who professes to practice medicine- air go-a liar. :D
buryedalive 1 week ago
does anybody know which show is it? I want to buy the DVD
raniplaut1 2 weeks ago
I cry with laughter every time I watch this!
bebop47s 3 weeks ago
My back doctor recently told me I'd never walk without a cane for the rest of my life. Said my back's totally fucked. He looked at me funny when I started laughing as I thought of this. Thanks, Billy!
VassagoX66 1 month ago 4
Scheisse, wie geil ist das denn, ich liebe es......
Holy shit, how fucking goood is that.....i luv it..
nastystic 1 month ago
A DEFUCKULATOR! XD
TheUrbanizer 2 months ago 9
@TheUrbanizer Indubitably an American invention.
SCE2AUX 3 weeks ago
Very funny geezer. Met him once in Edinburgh airport both waiting for a flight to NY. Friendly unassuming man. Loved i think by all in his homeland!!
tygersofpantang 2 months ago 3
PollockShaws is a fucking shit hole.
misfitstattoo 2 months ago
I seriously lost it at "defuckulator." Slevers all over my laptop.
bananachip33 3 months ago 4
Willy McBumferty, I love that name.
PEIGirl52 3 months ago
Fuck is Old English meaning "to plant." No lie. :) It makes sense.
diva0217 3 months ago
There is no stronger word than Fuck, no matter what subject it's applied to.
stevenewyork 3 months ago
@stevenewyork cunt
SigmaSigmaGnarly 3 months ago
@SigmaSigmaGnarly OK, maybe that one.
stevenewyork 3 months ago
4 people's hearts are fucked.
ShanesAutos 3 months ago 5
@ShanesAutos And they don't have any defuckulators.
Goannadria 3 months ago 5
No one with any sense gives a flying fuck about the babies whining and crying about using strong language. Do not defend yourself to these people, don't validate their existence in that way. The next time you need a response to one of these halfwits use mine; FUCK OFF. It's short sweet to the point and guaranteed to elicit the desired response.
z3r0t0l3r4ns 3 months ago
I don't see what's so bad about "Fuck" either...
ADEMruinedmylife909 3 months ago
LMAO I'm a medical student and I'd love to be THAT doctor lol. In an ideal world I could just give it to my patients straight up, no medical jargon involved...and all of my diagnoses consisting of variations of the word "fuck."
Billy, you're fucking brilliant :)
GAkopyan31 4 months ago
never try to brush your teeth while watching billy connolly. just slebbered all over the keyboard...
chaozuper 4 months ago 67
@chaozuper
Well true butter be brushing your teeth then eating I nearly died from laughter while i was eating some cornflakes the other day
tomber220 2 months ago
@chaozuper why are you brushing your teeth infront of the computer ? :P
MelbGavros 1 day ago
3 people got news that their hearts were fucked. pmsl
InfidelsUnitedTV 4 months ago
As Billy Connolly himself said....no other word can be substituted for fuck at times. You will never pick up a book and read "Fuck off", he hinted...
AliCat5683 4 months ago
FUCK
rabblue 4 months ago
A de-fuckulator? Is that an ugly as fuck woman or a promise? I can't decide... I'm not sure what "de" means in Scottish.
DeluxeSux 4 months ago
Well, Mr McBumferty
squatch1983 5 months ago
FEAR NOT WILLY
freakycfc09 5 months ago
A Defuckulatar!
LOL!!!
Copper4head 5 months ago
This has been flagged as spam show
HEY GUYS!! I'm a New Zealand comedian and my dream is to have a COMEDY TV PROGRAM to make people laugh their asses off and to help other up-and-coming comedians into the spotlight. i HAVE made a lot of videos that I REALLY WANT YOU TO CHECK OUT, so PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE check them out and subscribe!! Thank you xo
fruitnvege 5 months ago
the word fuck makes it better
JokerDreamscape 5 months ago
the king of comedy we have been listening to him for over 40 yrs love him to bits
fagashally 6 months ago 2
mr. mcbumferty what a name... im going to get the biggest fattest fluffiest cat and name him mr mcbumferty ... just genius :))
0x0darkangel 6 months ago 3
77777views
bboschboi 6 months ago
its all about context, watch that fucking car isn't offensive if you're not in the car. However I want to f****r you're mother is incredibly offensive and it ain't a bad word normally. Like wow look at my fingers
cnr93 6 months ago
i like the word fuck with my breakfast
billaroyamaha2 6 months ago
Defuckulator? You'de think it would implant Hymen into women
halfdogderek 7 months ago 2
Fuck is a fantastic word, the only difference between being classy and being yob, is knowing when to use it, in the right circumstances fuck, and in fact all sware words, are awesome little things, that add humor and emphasis to stuff when used properly. People who sware all the time kind of ruin them though. But Billy says, there is no english equivilant for FUCK OFF! =)
Phoenix1664 7 months ago
I always thought FUCK was something from the old England days when soldiers were lacking men, they'd have to go home and tell their wives that they were urged to bare more sons for their King. And their country.
So it was basically Fornication Under Command of King.
LightningShadowX 7 months ago 2
@LightningShadowX under consent of the king, not command
MrComatost 6 months ago
Like!? Like!? Where's the flippin’ LOVE IT Button? :o)
fraya1400 7 months ago
everyone who finds the word offensive can just fuck off
PaddyRoon7 8 months ago
The word FUCK came from the British Navy shorthand for those seamen who where charged (after shore leave) with...going with local loose ladies. The risk of infection was deemed to be a result of...For Unlawful Carnal Knowledge.
Geoffthebull 8 months ago
"de-fuckalator" <- made laugh even more than the earlier bits, but Billy is damn good ! :D
thehandyman88 8 months ago
Thx for this lmao, tears streaming from my eyes lol!!!
scaramonga1 9 months ago
oh god i'm crying this is so funny. His hearts fucked....brilliant. The bit about the "De-fuckulator" makes me laugh out loud every time XD!
holyswordsmanoffaith 10 months ago 2
His hearts fucked, LMAO. Ohh Willy.
HazerWITHTHElazeR 11 months ago
What a lot of people don't get is that the word "fuck" and various other swear words a huge staples in the Scottish dialect.
Fuck is basically a comma for us.
And people won't be phased if you call your best friend a cunt. I love my country.
ELREndLondonRule 1 year ago 3
@ELREndLondonRule
Aye, I know.. see you're a sensible cunt.
This cunt, that cunt, every cunt.
themarkofthebeast3 1 year ago
@themarkofthebeast3 Exactly. It's socially acceptable to call your best friend or spouse or family or child a CUNT.
ELREndLondonRule 1 year ago 3
A FUCKING funnny, FUCKING very FUCKING talented ,and FUCKING very FUCKING interesting FUCKING chap! I FUCKING love most of the material that this FUCKING funny FUCKER has ever FUCKING done! FUCKING love you. You FUCKING mega FUCKING star !!Respect William
tygersofpantang 1 year ago
In the words of the great George Carlin (words you can't say on television):
"There are no bad words, just bad intentions"
So I'll keep saying; fucking hell I love this guy!
Synoptichawk 1 year ago 2
Defuckulator! Class :D
bananachip33 1 year ago 2
I hear bad language is normal in Scotland. So, whatever.
RosesofWillows 1 year ago
@RosesofWillows By the same token I hear that people with rods up their arses live in the US. I have never met people that were easier to offend than there. They go out of their way to tell you that they don't like curse words, which has never ever happened to me before.
Nobody can express themselves quite like the Irish and the Scots :D.
TrueRahf 7 months ago
@TrueRahf oh yeah! I'll admit, i'm one of those people that don't care for curse words, but I'm used to it. Especially with my co-workers; they're more relaxed when speaking amongst themselves. I also don't mind it in Billy's case; a cultural thing he must have grown up with.
And you're right, it's very expressive!! :D "The doctor says 'His heart's fucked' "...Well alright, it paints clearer picture than just 'He has a bad heart.' LOL xD
RosesofWillows 7 months ago
@TrueRahf im an irish in america, and these people are prudes
johnnyrouke 6 months ago
@johnnyrouke Tell Brendan Gleeson that his film "The Guard" better come out on wide release soon. I so want to see some quality films from the isles.
TrueRahf 6 months ago
Who the fuck cares about "if you use bad language"?? They're just fucking WORDS. World as we know it is going to shit, and people worry about bad language :P
PS. Billy is amazing!
11DNA11 1 year ago
@11DNA11 "There is no such thing as bad language - it's just our morals that are fucked." - Billy Connolly
cwpo1973 11 months ago
@cwpo1973 Exactly.
11DNA11 11 months ago
Who the fuck does not like this joke? Get fucked, fucking fucktard.
perkko 1 year ago
@perkko In the words of Billy Connolly "If you don't like me swearing don't f*****g listen to me" Simples!
readysteady2 1 year ago 4
who gives a flying fuck about 'bad language'
only the truly irksome get wound up about it
whereas to other's it's just a sound made in conversation like any other word
cuntybollocking-shittynipples :O
IAINoodle 1 year ago
The word "fuck" is so over used that it has lost its shock value. A Queensland court recently decided that calling a police constanble a "prick" was NOT offensive. I believe that there is really only one true pronanity that gets everybody..it starts with a "c" and rhymes with "bunt"
hargra123 1 year ago
Funny as FUK!!
tygersofpantang 1 year ago
Ok, my little brother has a serious allergy problem that has screwed up his nasal passages. I took him to the doctor, and sat in the room as the doctor said, and this is no word of a lie, "I'm sorry to say son, but your nose is well and truly fucked." So it does actually happen.
solign 1 year ago 39
@solign my doctor down here is great
she swares constantly
me- hi
her- well whats fucked up with you this time for you to be here
knorneknight888 1 year ago
@solign
Walk in clinic in the Bronx, by any chance?
Jmonstra 2 weeks ago
If you're offended by the word 'fuck', why are you watching Billy Connolly? Just an observation.
XionsDruid 1 year ago 4
"De-Fuckulator" Epic xD
NaiirZ 1 year ago 3
I come from a whole team of comedians [some think they are, too, but not], and to be absolutely fair the word "fuck" is only used in its proper text. If you check Wickipedia, I'm sure the word and meaning according to them would be found.
Knowing someone like Billy Connelly, Roy "Chubby" Brown or Dave Chapelle, that would be expected from their language and behaviour. All three are great, even if they do use excessive bad language.
TheHashExpress 1 year ago
ma mam works in the royal =)
Sophaayx 1 year ago
Fantastic Billy Classic the best comic ever in my humble opinion Pure Genius.
Seanadun 2 years ago 3
Tellin' it like it fuckin' is!! never mind the..well...he's no' that good... or...we're very worried...or even...he's in intensive care! The Scottish tradition states " tell it like it fuckin' is!" - His heart's fucked! lolol
billyconnearly 2 years ago 2
I want a defuckulator now :) See how it works exactly.
LoonyLooners 2 years ago 3
a defuckulator!
hippiefreak66 2 years ago
His heart's fucked LMFAO. Oh Billy, you slay me.
OriginalHazeBX 2 years ago 2
This has got to be one of the funniest things ive ever seen. Classic Connolly.MAGIC
tygersofpantang 2 years ago
de-fuckulator xD
SillySongsWithKahlee 2 years ago 3
FUCK FUCKITY-FUCK FUCK FUCK
pfalky2k 2 years ago
This comment has received too many negative votes show
think he is fucking class`but he seems
lost his roots !! since he met that new
wife`he`s became middle class v neck
cunt !!! lol well if ad his £ prob fuck off
fae glesga !!!
magicmushy2007 2 years ago
aha a de-fuckulator XD
god theres a big argument on the word fuck..i thought it was hilariuos the way he put it...and i do think its an offensive word if you say it to someone angrily...and its just not offensive wen ur talking aboout something not meant to be angry like "that sun is fucking hot" to me seems like a comment about the sun ...being fucking hot.....cause it is...especially a very hot sun... =D so yea. its a weird word (: lol xxxxx
misscornflakes08 2 years ago 34
bahh blah blah blah
RXCRadio 2 years ago
to me?
misscornflakes08 2 years ago
nope
RXCRadio 2 years ago
oh right..u mean people go on like bla bla bla?
misscornflakes08 2 years ago
indeed
RXCRadio 2 years ago
@misscornflakes08 sure.. but anything is offensive when said angrily am i right?
Sc0ttPrian 7 months ago
Personally i like the word FUCK and im scottish lol Billy rocks!!!!! :)
lainnie25 2 years ago 71
@lainnie25 I also love Billy and his attitude to the words, " FUCK OFF"! There's nothing else like it in the World. It describes just what the **** you want and you effing want it to happen NOW!
Could you check out my channel, where you'll find my profile pic of my American number plate tattoo that I made up myself. It makes the F. OFF point. :o)
fraya1400 7 months ago
This has been flagged as spam show
OMG, does he make stand up comedy?
I like this guy, though he was creepy in the X files.
halffade 3 years ago
To be fair, I think SHARONUKN18 was just analyzing Billy's gag. And how the usage of 'fuck' can be equally side splitting funny, but on the other offensive. In this case SHARONUKN18 is right, people use 'fuck' in this context without meaning to be offensive, yet it's bloody funny.
tgm99999 3 years ago 19
Sounds to me Rock5501 your reading into this comment too much...or else you have too much time on your hands...i was just "commenting" by the by...i have lived here in the US for 30 years, and i have been asked on many occasions why us British use the word fuck alot..so yes maybe i was defending the British language, so the FUCK what.Now fuck off...
SHARONUKN18 3 years ago
But thats typical of how we talk...right now my poor old mums legs are fucked...and i feel fucked off. There is something about us British with that word, its totally not meant to offend anybody.
SHARONUKN18 3 years ago
It didn't offend anyone, he thought it was funny. And it was.
archontic 3 years ago
omg develop a sense of humour SHARONUKN18 !
rock5501 3 years ago
This has been flagged as spam show
WTF you talking about? I DO have a great sense of humour....i am British!!!!I am from North London, i have 10 Billy Connellys in my family.
SHARONUKN18 3 years ago
i am british aswell. but in the video, it doesnt offend anyone. so then you defend british language, and that it offended someone, when it didnt. so it seemed pointless.
rock5501 3 years ago