Added: 4 months ago
From: davidmitchellsoapbox
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  • Comment removed

  • Brian Blessed is a beast, take that back Mitchell!

  • @fearthefurby If only he didn't call Stephen Fry "Spunk-Bubble"

  • Oh my god, it took me a couple of seconds to get the businessman joke. Classic :D

  • I love mitchell and webb but marathons are brilliant, as is all running- its not a vain fitness objective, its a personal goal to bring yourself to new levels

  • @RoryDangerCox1 He's not criticizing that aspect of marathons. He's merely stating that having sponsorship for running a marathon is not efficient. As I understand it, it's very common in the London marathon to raise money for the participation.

    I hardly feel like transcribing the entire video, so I recommend you re-watch it in order to fully capture the message David was trying to convey.

  • @RoryDangerCox1 Did you even watch the whole video? Bring yourself to 'new levels' sure, but don't ask me to pay for you to do it.

  • @RoryDangerCox1

    Isn't that his point?

    Why should others have to pay for your 'personal goal to bring yourself to new levels'

  • It's the symbolism of it, David. Or, to put it more cynically, a publicity stunt.

  • I want to know more about this slug who needs saving. Did he get stuck in a crack in the pavement? Does he have slug cancer? Will the marathon raise enough money to provide for his slug family if we are unable to save him? Where can I send money?

    Also, "slug" is a weird word. Slug slug slug

  • @molegoddess I think it was cancer

  • OMG did anyone get a f-ing lame 11 min video about Ron Paul. I click the link wanting a funny David Mitchell logical rant and I get a commercial about the irrational douche bag Ron Paul. There are few things i hate about google and putting crap commercial on youtube is one of them

  • @Aerandir09

    1. He's less irrational than the rest of the candidates. But, yes, they are all quite shit.

    2. The 6 seconds you had to wait to skip the ad pales in comparison to the length of time you would have had to devote to typing out how ever many hundreds of letters that you did.

  • Mitchell you're like jesus... but with a better beard

  • I would lick him out clean

  • agree :)

  • Amen!!!

  • I'll bear this in mind the next time David Mitchell participates in Comic Relief and asks everyone to donate money whilst witnessing him performing the spectacular achievement of doing his job.

  • @ldpthejimmy

    You miss the two important distinctions.

    1. He likely donates his time, so it isn't doing a job.

    and

    2. The service he is providing (entertaining by use of comedy) is one that is in demand by the people who are potentially donating.

    Notice how #2 makes it distinctly different than a marathon? No one giving money wants you to run, but the people giving money do want him to perform.

  • @ApesAmongUs That's a bit of an assumption to make. Everyone I sponsor to run a marathon (or similar) - I want to see them do it and will often attend the event as support.

  • @ldpthejimmy Would you pay to see someone run in any context other than a donation marathon? no. If you would then I guess the only time a marathon makes sense is when it is sponsored by a millionare with a fetiche for running.

  • @Nochibou1 What's the point in asking a question if you're just going to answer it yourself? And yes, I have a ticket for the completion of the marathon at the London Olympics.

  • the Greek army did needed the serves of the marathon runner to get reinforcements

  • Is anyone else surprised that the English have the same euphamism as the Americans, "going down on."

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  • Well at the end of the day, it doesn't matter what you do as long as the charity benifits.

    With that in mind - check this out.

    w w w. justgiving. com/briannesuncleneil

    (with out the spaces)

  • David, with beard and less body fat you are not as funny. sorry.

  • Fellate or cunnilinguate.

  • "I mean I can't see the point of it...it's shrouded in cloud"

  • Maybe we run marathons to commemorate the battle at Marathon? Though I suppose that if no one knows what that is then it isn't working very well.

  • I like running...

  • I wonder how many people reply on this thinking David will see them. Eh, David?

  • I totally agree with this rant. The marathon thing is so old and boring. Even sponsoring someone in an eating contest would be more productive not to mention more entertaining. "Alright Greg $2 per hot dog. GO!" ...20 hot dogs later "think of the children Greg!"

    What about titty fucks for breast cancer?

  • i agree with ol beardy mitchell here, i skateboard and it is exceedingly fun and quite a bit of excercise but it seems to me that simply running to point of painful discomfort and exhaustion seems like something a bit worse than work, though it is a decent work-out, to me i don t see the enjoyment, a few miles maybe but more than 5 or so is just a bit odd.

  • Bow i have to go find Exarian's comment

  • I guess using the Great Wall of China as an example it could be thought of as: Paying to got there and walking it vs Paying to go there and walking it whilst raising money for charity. I may be wrong but as far as I know the money from sponsorships doesn't go towards the paying of getting there... Unless a charity pays for you to go long as you promise to make more money from sponsors maybe... so yeah that is indirectly like paying for the to go on holiday... nevermind :P

  • @Miners666 Well I guess the point still stands - that they would do it anyway but they could do it with the added bonus of getting some money for charity.

  • @Miners666 Either way, money that could be actually going toward the charity is going toward a plane flight, regardless of whose money it is.

  • @TheDSil But then surely using that stance one could argue that no money should be spent on anyone going anywhere ever, or even on anything ever but charity. Which is a nice idea that I could theoretically support in the main but I doubt any majority of people would.

  • @Miners666 Not at all. My stance is simply that non-charity expenditures should not be represented as for-charity expenditures. By all means, buy a trip to China. Just don't call it a good deed.

  • @TheDSil I know what you mean more now,it's not the kind of thing I would do anyway, I just give charities any money I can. My initial point I suppose was if that person was going to buy a trip to China anyway (and never going to give any of it to charity) then buying a trip to China and raising some money as well is better of the two; but I agree that it shouldn't be said that they were specifically doing it for charity if that was the case.

  • @Miners666 Also alternatively if the amount of money raised for charity by going to China was more than the cost of the trip (lets say the trip cost £200 but raised £2000) then the £1800 would be better than the person giving the charity the initial £200 and not going to China?

  • If he ever ran a marathon he'd know why people do it. Or rather if he was the type of sporty person that would do that kind of thing.

    The charity thing is secondary, I think. It's like "we may as well get some sponsors for charity while we're at it."

    I'm very unfit now and these things are a reminder that not everyone's a physical wretch like me, so they do unfit people good too. It sets an example, just because it's unpaid normal people celebrating their fitness. There should be more of that.

  • I think that a certain cult has developed out of this whole marathon thing. it's the cult if toe shoes. (shudder) basically someone decided that because people 1000's of years ago ran across deserts in their bare feet we today should do the same ( disregarding those thousands of years of evolution where our feet developed to love shoes that protected your feet) one of the steps to becoming 100% shoe-less is the toe shoes their like those socks that separate each toe from the others except they'

  • Sadly, my "I suck cock for AIDS" charity event raised surprisingly little.

  • The cleaner asked me to sponser her doing a sky dive for charity. I was rummaging around for some money whilst casually asking about how much it costs to do a sky dive these days, and she replied "nothing". "How come "nothing"?" say I; "cos its for charity innit? the money I raise goes towards paying for the dive, but overall theres more money for charity than if I don't do it, so its a good thing innit?" says she. "Empty the bin and GTFO" Were my concluding words.

  • Brilliant!!! I love this new era of telling it as it is, David Mitchell and Karl Pilkington, a breath of fresh air :)

  • I'd like to pass comment about the unnecessary use of comma's after the words 'but' and 'and' in the subtext that has kindly been put on for those having to watch Mr Mitchell in a silent environment... doesn't anyone care what Lynne Truss thinks anymore!?

  • @sharonburtonfletcher What about the unnecessary use of apostrophes?

    

  • @mihohobaba Absolutely tragic! ;)

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  • I never intend to do a Marathon...I've already run marathons just for kicks. I do intend to race a Marathon one day.

  • @iMaDeMoN2012 I'm confused by your comment, it makes no scense

  • @Cazzanevo Have you ever run a mile? I run several miles everyday. There is a difference between running and racing. For athletes finishing a marathon, that is mundane task. A real challenge is racing one competitively.

  • @iMaDeMoN2012 ooooooh I get it :D

  • Thankyou! 

  • I think this is ....... satire - whereas X-factor is not. If you don't like David Mitchell it would probably be better to watch X-factor instead. Or I'm a Celebrity ....

  • Am I the only one who mentally shouts, "FINNEMOOOORRRRRRRE!!!" at the end of each of these credits?

  • I never even knew you could get sponsored for running a marathon. I'm currently practicing for next year's, but it's purely for myself. For charity, I work for Red Cross.

  • Hey David, want to join me in my peep show marathon? Followed by a victory lap of the Mitchell and Webb situation?

  • The myth is that Pheidippides ran from Marathon to Athens to deliver the news of the Greek winning the battle, he then fell down and died. Thus inspiring the marathon race idea.

    Personaly I usual say that there is a lesson to be learned about the health benefits of marathon running in that myth...

  • @grape387 Absolutely. I do intend to run a marathon at some point in my life but just one. Its really bad for you!

  • Does anyone know which soapbox this one quote is from? I seem to recall David at one point stating that he always expects the worst and is never disappointed, then inviting the viewer to imagine how much fun he is at parties. I cannot for the life of me recall exactly whence I heard this. /befuddle

  • @oilboyy There's nothing for it but to watch them all from the beginning, I'm afraid.

  • @oilboyy wow /befuddle is a totally awsome way to end a comment :)

  • @Cazzanevo false

  • @544001 No way :)

  • Certainly agree with the last sentiment. I've done a few things for charity but I'll only do things I don't actually want to do and get no pleasure from. Spent many hours on my bike and running because I pretty much hate physical exercise. Would never ask for money to go skydiving or bungee jumping as I'd take far too much pleasure from them. If you want sponsoring for something it should be bloody unpleasant & hard.

  • 2:10 ORANGE NECK.

  • Pause at any time near the start for lols.

  • There should be a word for performing cunnilingus... Maybe cunnaling.

  • whats the number for dirty david?

  • David Mitchell's angry logic destroys something common, yet again...

  • David Mitchell saying "go down on". I'm so turned-on.

  • are any other 'would i lie to you' watchers out there wondering 'WHERE'S THE BEARD?!!'

  • I have ran 5 marathons... and laughed heartily at this..as I always do at David Mitchell... I miss 10 O'clock live..

  • I've never understood sponsorship either. Just give them the money.

    By the way - Everest isn't the TALLEST mountain, it's the HIGHEST. There are much taller mountains in the Atlantic Ocean.

    Now I'd pay good money to see Brian Blessed climb one of them! Lol!

  • Not sponsored to go on holiday you say? Well I've been sponsored for 2 trips to Europe and 1 to Scotland to compete in Minesweeper competitions.... (yeah, the shitty Windows game)... all the way from South Africa..... t(-.-t)

  • I'd call "Dirty David" ;) ;)

  • Marathons are for faggots and small-dicked men

  • @WKaliberr So which one are you?

  • @extraad a big dicked nigga who pounded your cunt of a mom

  • @WKaliberr what a sad, pathetic, powerless person you must be. Get professional help.

  • @extraad I touched a nerve there didnt I...

  • One of the managers in work was selling raffle-tickets once. After a fair few people had got some he came-up to me. I said; "What's it for?" he replied ;"A bottle of whiskey." I frowned then asked; "No, what's the cause?" He said; "I want to go to Florida."-it was no charity!

  • Well, as a runner I can't understand why he can't understand having a satisfying hobby and wanting to use it to benefit others.

  • pause it at 2:46 for a screenshot i'm sure will be used in the press

  • "I can't see the point of it - it's shrouded in cloud" - gaaah, pun! But subtly done...

  • People get sponsored for holiday all the time, its called missionary work.

  • Today pupils at my school were offered a once in a a life time trip to Zambia, safari, expedition, that stuff. It all sounded great until we were told the price. I asked how they thought anybody's parents would be insane enough to pay that much for this, but the response was: 'we're going to ask for sponsorship'. You don't get sponsored to go on Holiday!

  • If you're into running then you'd understand about the 'runner's high' and the joy of testing your mettle. What I don't understand is how/what anything you said has to do with an underwater flag? Somebody seems determined to try out every effect in the editing software.

  • @greyareaRK1 It's not underwater, it's blowing in the breeze.

  • @HighlandChicken Does wind work differently in the UK? ;-) My guess is the editor used an underwater effect and hoped it would pass for wind. As a former post-fx artist

  • Thankyou for subtitling this! Now I can enjoy your quick wits! :D

  • I'd donate towards a better video next time..

  • i bet he's growing a beard because for his peep show character Mark

  • david's beard makes him look fly

  • David Mitchell doesn't understand man as an evolved social animal.

  • @KrisdashPaul

    All animals are evolved, we've just dominated. You fail to see the inefficient side to humanity. You can achieve more in terms of money without running a marathon. So why run it? But he does concede the part of honouring someone or raising awareness etc. I think he has a pretty good view of how humans work in this respect and how better they could work

  • @KrisdashPaul

    Man just adapted the environment to suit him, instead of the other way around. We are in no way evolved or civilized, and that is why we will continue this way until our inevitable extinction.

  • @KrisdashPaul

    Man just adapted the environment to suit him, instead of the other way around. We are in no way evolved or civilized, and that is why we will continue this way until our inevitable extinction.

  • Book Ends Against Read Documents!

  • This is basically my exact opinion. Not sure how he's stealing my thoughts, but it's fine by me really. heh.

  • The sound on these really does need turning up. My volume is full and I can barely hear this.

  • @GatorM My volume is set to about 30% and it's plenty loud already. Solution: new speakers.

  • you forgot the social aspect... If I were to run a marathon it would be to gain respect. nothing more.

  • ...or hooking!?

  • If you wanna raise money for charity, just raise money for charity. I agree with David, raising money for a good cause and running a certain length aren't really linked.

  • Just like many others I'm sure, I've both sponsored and have received sponsorship for marathon/walks etc. Once when I was helping gain runners for a cause, one person asked, "can I just raise the money and not run?" Naturally I couldn't reply, "no, if you don't run, you can't help acquire money for the cause. That's just not allowed." Indeed, the concept doesn't entirely makes sense, and seems to be kept in practice simply for the sake of "it's-always-been-done-this-wa­y."

  • @davewr00 Can they not raise money by proxy for someone else to run? I realise this is equally pointless, but it lets charitably-minded people keep up the ritual of the thing...

  • @johnnye87 I don't think they ended up running, but still brought money in for the cause. That could be a viable alternative, but I think the idea is that the most important thing is raising awareness and the money for causes like ending child sex trafficking, not that a bunch of people walk a certain distance because they received a donation. Albeit, I'm all for marathons and all that, as long as the reason for the activity is the main thing.

  • The worst ones are sponsored bunjee jumps and sky dives. That and people who raise a load of money in advance to do something, then don't do it but you can't really ask for the money back.

  • Businessman hahahahah 

  • I pretty sure a startling has nested in David Mitchell's beard.

  • Dat banana.

  • TIL: Felate is a verb

  • @JPlayer253 And a fun way to spend the day.

  • @JPlayer253 Narwahals?

  • @TheHDreality I'm given to understand that the Narwahl bacons at midnight.

  • I never thought I would hear David Mitchell say 'go down on someone'.

  • Save the Slug! <3

  • Get rid of the beard Mitchell!

  • ....and as I watch this clip Google ads are encouraging me to buy the lastest in jog wear....

  • I hope that beard goes before he starts taping would I lie to you or quite interesting (qi) again!! I don't think I could handle watching that beard on tv

  • I think i'm trippin balls...

  • Says the fat guy

  • @Exarian Funny, I'm also seeing a pattern for what a David Mitchell Soapbox is:

    A joke.

  • @Exarian It's called 'observational comedy,' and sometimes feigning ignorance is the only way to set up the joke. His whole schtick with these soapbox videos is that he RANTS about something. It's likely to be something that someone else doesn't find frustrating, confusing, annoying, or dumb. If you can't handle that possibility, perhaps don't watch. It's only here for amusement, and if it's not amusing you, it's a waste of your time.

  • So... Where can I PayPal money for sponsoring Mitchell's felatio sessions?

  • @RakshasaCat I'm sure Steven Fry is setting up the trust.

  • @RakshasaCat I'm sure Steven Fry is setting up the trust.

  • That last bit reminds me of a manager I used to work with who got people to sponsor him, for charity and such, so he could go on a trek to see Mt Kilimanjaro.

    I wish I was kidding.

  • He should really get rid of that beard- he looks about 20 years older now (and a lot like my dad...)

  • What's "hooking" in this context?

  • @uzirnis being a hooker (sexual context)

  • I know David isn't God's Gift to womanhood in terms of looks, but by Jove, that beard... All a bit too much.

  • @dexdex1560 Problem solved :D

  • @callumrocksyoursocks my god that is hilarious! were now up to three!

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  • Fellatio in the name of charity?

    Sure, why not? We could even a national Red Knob Day.

  • @DitzyStephanie looking for donations?

  • @DitzyStephanie

    I'd say it a hell of a lot more enjoyable than running untill you vomit and/or crap yourself.

  • run fatboy, run!

  • What a hero

  • can I get the phone number for 'Dirty David' please?? I want to donate! :)

  • If it were a real marathon (as in, from the original Marathon runner in Greece) then it would require that every runner die at the end of it.

  • @DreamfallenOne thats a myth btw he did not die

  • @cybercossack LIES! YOU'RE A MYTH! Oh, and actually, it's a legend, not a myth.

  • David Mitchell needs to be the next Andy Rooney.

  • I did a marathon. I didn't do it for charity, I just signed up for it when I was drunk and, as a scotsman, I would sooner run 26 miles than have wasted £40.

  • @whydoilivetoseethis this is the single greatest comment I've ever read on Youtube - no joke!

  • @Whatupwidat me too!!!

  • @whydoilivetoseethis that has to be the funniest comment Ive ever seen online! really. :D

  • @whydoilivetoseethis theres a set up for a proclamers joke in there somewhere im sure??

  • His beard is glorious.

  • My father always taught me to respect a man with a beard... Mitchell respect is due

  • Now trying to figure out the female word for fellate. All I can come up with is cunniling which just sounds silly.

  • Long live the beard. I expect to see a corncob pipe in the next installment! :P

  • Those people who get sponsored to go on holiday really annoy me - "will you sponsor my parachute jump?" No. donate the money it's costing you to go on the parachute jump to charity.

  • Does "going down on" have a fancy latin term? "Fellate and/or go down on" just seems disappointing.

  • @LeaveItToPsmith Cunnilingate?