Yeah i seriously just posted this

[hamster06666]

lol call him potato lol ur nickname for him sounds like potato

[reredrummer123]

"bitchmotherfuckingtity" yeah Id say that.

[SM569]

i want your booty.

[thenewkeg10609]

ur so sexy.

[DdarkSideProductions]

i luv u nigga u iz funny az shytt ttyl

[dchsdl]

wow i just watched the whole thing and am kind of impressed that you can just monologue for 20 minutes and have it be interesting lol

[bananabreadblonde]

your pretty fucking awesome thought id let u no hahahhaha

[Geronamid]

That was depressingly funny. Weird.

[beckyrocks7]

i would go on a nice quiet walk with you any day !

[crazy4converses]

omg!!! do you live in colorado!!!???? that looks like colorado

[lucade45]

you could play Otacon from Metal Gear

[URxIMAGINARYxSTALKER]

you have a high voice........

O_o

[waitawholesecond]

"don't eat the berries, they're poisonous!" hahah, that was so freaking cute :3

[JoshWenham]

"Quiet times over, arsehole!"

Haha, good one.

[lalopadilla95]

hey how did you can upload a 19:34 minutes video?

[attackofthepoprocks]

He's a YouTube partner.

[MollyMassacree]

lmao, nice battle cry through the burs.

"Stupid fuckin' bunny"

Hehe, you makez me laugh.

[AmyriadfthINGs]

geniusjordan. it's no big deal at all to watch 20 min of you unedited and that's not something many people can say of themselves :) or that can be said about them.

if someone can pull this off AND be entertaining as hell it's you!

<3

[WillzWatching]

BEAUTIFUL .... was the landscape..... and your face ;)

[carsonmaier14]

brrr snow.

[3ILuvmusic]

"No! Run bunny run!"

"Your going to shot,that stupid fucking bunny!"

haha best parts

[FoxELaura]

at least you dog comes to you when you call him lol

[neurapraxia]

Ah, I watched the whole thing. Loved it - it's nice to watch videos by people who actually have personality! (:

[ceres51892]

I love your hair! And I watched this whole thing. You and your dog are so adorable. And yeah, that guy sounds like a douche. I also lol'd when you said "I could end my life right now if I wanted to. All I gotta do is eat this berry." I love it.

-Ri

[GinGinia91]

Watched all of it =)

You're really interesting. More people should go for a walk and talk to the camera like this. You're pretty awesome keep it up =D

[sfb001]

Your are an extremly interesting individual. *subs*

I like the realness of your videos, the strange haunting emptiness that you evoke.

My family has a black lab, she is full of energy, like Dakota. Its been said that black labs are best for kids...due to the fact that they have such a large amount of energy.

keep posting

S

[boredness6789]

you posted this on my B-day. oh yeah.

[JeffyJeff69]

Dude, you are awesome!

[DieEinAntwort]

I just watched all of it ~~~~

~~~~ ALL 19 min and 43 sec of it!

just because you're just that interesting ~~~ and hilarious

keep up the awesome work ! =^.^=

[dirtydozen8988]

haha lmao.

[BlinkFly]

I have a yellow lab named Dakota :)

[camiphoebendo]

haha okaay well that was so funny! and i know i say that about every vido, but ya you can be funny just talking to yourself

[gayboyTX]

Love the Blair Witch reference. :-)

[MollyMassacree]

lmao.

"Dakota, you're gunna get shot."

[jasondavid]

Ow, bitch mother fucking titty that hurt!

[7choosy7]

u look good w/ eyeglasses on ^_*

[love4mygoddess]

hahaha epic

[yarrboots]

haha dakota & the bunny

[pyleofgracie]

Very "The Blair Witch Project." I love it! :)

[ticklemetyler3392]

haha "mmm if i didnt know any better id think hes a mountain lion."

hahhaaha

[laughingatyourface]

"NO THE BUNNY! RUN BUNNY RUN"

I was talking to someone on MSN and wasn't paying any attention to this at the time and then you suddenly screamed this and I was just like "HOLY - o.o"

You're so adorable xD

[AlabamaWhurley]

I like your energy (or lack thereof) Your videos are mundane yet oddly intriuging...they remind me of a Wes Anderson movie for some reason. Fun.

[realityisrelative89]

i did not know you were allowed to post videos this long : S

[legandofnaruto]

lol

oh my god u should givew ur dog dis aplin

[AnUnnoticedFallen]

"Bitch, I'mma cut you. I'mma fucking cut you."

O_O Wow..... I just about pissed myself on that statement alone. Good job man. Good job....

[mvelton]

ahahahahah! jordan, this is one of the best videos you have ever done. baby, LET'S GET IT ONNNNN!!! :)

[phantomphreak573]

UR REALLY HOTT

[arceus377]

your booty your booty your booty is so fucking gay faggit

[juggleaid78]

"That stupid fucking bunny. should of just stayed in his den" :D

[ohdangitsdakotah]

is your name dakota?! LOL that's my name (:

[janesstory]

hahaha your soo funny.

your the only person i know who can take 20 minutes to say absolutely nothing and still be interesting

[lckmim]

Don't eat them, I'll miss you :'( <3 :)

[Marvin20045]

^_^ i watched the whole thing, you're very entertaining. =]

[pennfieldactor]

oh i love your little reaction at 5:44... possibly the best sound ever made! and my dog is mean to bunnies too.

[nancyr13]

how old are you Jordan?

[volnessj]

seven

[nancyr13]

seventeen?

[KolieRAD]

do you ever wonder what your neighbors think if they see you walking round outside with acamera talking about shoving things up some kids ass?

lmaooo!.

"where that dog be."

[vintagemeblue]

i loooove you

i saw ur video

"fuck u u cant convert me"

first video i saw of u

and ur so right

i hella want to met u

not in a creepy way and i i know we wont

but ur just so cute!

[gerry721]

Even though this video is damn near 20 minutes, I watched the whole thing because it's just so amazing. Jordan, you are so amazing and you look extra cute in this video. :D

[snotpokkit]

I am kindof bored with YouTube lately, but your long "pointless" videos are very compelling for me now despite it all :)

[Tjsreddog]

I'm curious as of how long it took you to upload this whole thing, haha.

[xJustPressPlay]

20 minutes?!! :D

[mez01rules]

bravo jordan, bravo. you need to make 20 minute long videos more often

[gtoothy]

that was the best 19 minutes and 43 seconds of my life. it looks sooo fucking cold there. i couldnt handle that. which is why i live in so cal

[straub11]

from 6:40 to 8:00 you said "maybe" 22 times. but i mean whos counting... i mean who would even sit around watching you walk down a trail for 20 minutes..well maybe i did. maybe.

[daveyboy0281]

hey jordan. Im in London and very cold. Wanna wrm me up . (facebook)

[volnessj]

i remember you. It's much colder here I can tell you that.

[cougarfan1341]

dont lie to the dog lol

[tootsie086]

i liked this. i liked this alot.

[snlguru1021]

I thought that maybe I shouldn't watch this video because it's so long...but I decided to in the end...and it was totally worth it.

[lakesideparkplace]

I didnt know videos could go this long. omg lol.

this made my morning cereal amazing thank you lol

"I could end my life with one of these berries" lol

[whataboutadam]

WHAT HAPPENED WITH THE WHITE VAN?? Don't leave cliffhangers like that!

[Genesis2091]

Ahahahahaha, Jordan, You are absolutely adorable, and hilarious. Btw, I like your hair like that, even if you said you hadn't showered =P It's a good style for you. ^^

[haileyhyunjikim]

hehe jordan, your videos are always so adorable ♥ ♥ ♥ they make me smile

luv u

[satsuki26]

my god i love you

[simplyplainethan]

LMAO

i was getting an abnormally large amount of subs

and i was baffled

"could this really be from my 5abf video?"

i thought

but no

its from my sexual lover

love you Jordan!

<3

I will reward you later in bed ;)

[volnessj]

yes i was hoping i would get some sex out of this!

[Legolas451]

20 minutes of Jordan Volness greatness.

"Volness at his best"

-Chicago Times Tribune

"A masterpiece"

-The New York Post

"One of the greatest minds of our time"

-LA Times

"Would walk down a snowy path with this git anyday"

-Me

Thanks for keeping it real bitch-assness!

[volnessj]

hahah i love you

[live0be0NOW]

Not only did I watch the entire thing, I consumed an entire sleeve of oreos as well during the process.

OREOS + THIS VIDEO = HAPPINESS

: )

[maclover246]

omg longest video ever! i had to watch that in installments to get through...and just give me that guys channel and i will chop something off

[LettuceBeTogether]

Is this actually 20 minutes? Sorry Jordan, I can't do it. I watch 2 minutes though... :)

[volnessj]

you failed the test

[LettuceBeTogether]

AH! The guilt trip, okay, okay, I will watch the whole thing. By the way, Your doggy looks like a black fox!!!! So cute!

[anythingsarcastic]

Have my babies

[rockmyworld93]

oh

i love you so much! :]

[breeza44]

omg black lab <3

[nysel01]

you're so lucky that you're gorgeous, you should find an agent! you look like a Calvin Klein model to me ;-)

[dxh32839]

Wow I loved it! I literally watched all of it.

[savingxcharlie]

Jordan, you are definitely the deepest person on youtube.

Deeper than that snow you were falling in. :)

[trickypixie1208]

i laughed so hard at this vid..it made my day so much

[B4sketC4se]

Best.... thing.... ever....

I would like to see Dan & you mak... nevermind.

[LHIED]

its almost 15 minutes long!

ZOMG

no i have things to do tonight, like finish homework, make supper, and then sleep until tomorrow morning

but it looks kewl

[awesomefrog1]

i watched this entire video just because i love you jordan

and i dont think you wasted 19 minutes and 43 seconds of my life at all

[ViolentServant]

i love how this video is 20 mins long. And i love the whole walking and filming shake.. reminds me of blair witch. But, in a good way. I love the voice that you used when you talked to Dakota.

"and maybe that bunny is scared" <- lol.

Great story about how you realized everything that you had to live for. :P

Thanks for a good 20 mins of enterttainment!

[AtomSmasher78]

That was absolutely brilliant.  Cinema verite, but ummmm colder.

[blackanesian]

i looked up that zane welton kid on facebook

ugh he looks kinda crazy

i too saw the whole thing, i wish it snowed in hawaii

but its just so fricken hot

chilly lately though

[KuhrissaNicole12]

I really love how you dramatized this whole thing :P

'Twas funny.

[lovinhim4life]

You look really cute out there.

[lamiavitadolce]

I watched the whole video ((:

I like listening to you ramble about random stuff LOL (:

[dantonn91]

the fact that 663 people have watched all 19 minutes of this glorious video, suggests that you are a wonderful and beautiful human being, and that you should make love to me.

[nina435]

i think it actually starts counting views after 30 seconds...

[Cristaaaaal44]

someone's adorable.

and looks naked under that trench coat.

:D

[volnessj]

like i would go out there not wearing clothes!

yes i would. I like frost bit ballz.

[Cristaaaaal44]

omg who doesn't?

and we all know you just want to flash your brother's dog.

[jazzw0rth]

I can totally imagine that, Jordan...

which is entertaining and disturbing at the same time.

I like the pea coat though. I wants it.

[EhMountain]

oh my goodness, 19 minutes, i'm trying to decide whether or not i'm going to watch the whole thing....

lets see home work or Jordan... hmm, not a very tough decision.

i'll stay.

[likeablerain]

everyone deserves gloves

[volnessj]

umm yeah okay.

[wolfprincess4ever]

...Dude..I wish it snowed down here!...I hate where I live. and you know we love your videos no matter how long they are..lol

[animaluvr7]

That's alot of snow. here, its sunny with clear skies, and about 70 degrees.

[corpsevalentine]

My Fav. Quotes:

bitch titty my fingers cold!

jordan's chris crocker moment: "bitch ima cut yu" lol

[DaWorldDominator]

it is about 80 degrees here at the moment. the sun is beating down on me because i wore black. I have no life so i will watch all of this video :) The part about nathan was so sweet. i love your hair and that is all i have to say about that.

[dnl783]

D: NEARLY 20 MINUTES???? Your worse than Tino!!

[greenromancepark]

lol. Even though you talk about nothing, we all love it!

It was awesome. You're really funny.

[jessily0425]

Who is Nathan?

[volnessj]

my sex god

[mechmech101]

haha okay so this video just proves how much i love you, it is the tester. you know why? bc im pretty sure if anyone else posted a 20min long video about nothing i wouldnt watch it, but for you jordan i certainly did, and i enjoyed EVERY minute of it.

bitch maybe i liked it so much imma rate five stars, or maybe i wont....or MAYBE i already did.

im not sure why i just called u bitch

[volnessj]

i love it when people call me bitch. I call everyone bitch. I posted this to test my subscribers, and you def passed my dear.

[antoniosjourney]

16:45 "Where you at Mikado?!" LOLOLOLOLOLOLOL

[JoeiNoelani]

noooo

the bunny!

so i know i'm going to watch this whole stupid video. even though i have shit to do.

omg.... i'm not even at ten min yet... jesus

hahaha it's the scurry woods!

:) you so bull shitted the majority of that story of the stick... except the stick part...

i love you

<3

[volnessj]

hahah bitch you don't know! You were like 3 miles behind me!

[Ray3010]

It was a real nice and quiet walk with you! ;) ...so don't worry, the vid was awesome!

[lovekimbra]

i like the way you swear.

just thought i'd let you know.

[volnessj]

i like the way you move.

[lovekimbra]

you better. i should be a dancer. hot.

[antoniosjourney]

P.P.S. Your hair looks kinda kewl like that.

[antoniosjourney]

P.S. Thos things on your shoulder...we used to call them cocoa balls when I was a kid.

[antoniosjourney]

This was the best mutha' fuckin' video EVER! I watched every damn second of it. You are so hilarious to watch. This was better than any reality show.

[bonbinallo]

maybe this was the best video ive ever watched...maybe

[EirosNevermore]

right, so did you just run out of video perfectly when you finished saying the white van bit, or did you stop shooting? it was sooper crazy and interesting

[volnessj]

i got scared and stoped recording.

[EirosNevermore]

who needs to watch tv when you're making 20 min vids :P

loves it

jordan ftw

[brentbraniff]

Arnt you suppose to go to a nice park with your dog instead of going out in the middle of nowhere...Oh wait you live in North Dakota and everywhere is the middle of nowhere...(I can make fun of North Dakota because I too live in an equally desolate part of the state...Is that possible?)

[dinosaurie44]

19 minutesss , omg sorry if i dont watch this all :)

[Shay0Pache]

Your Hair Is Ubber Red

In This Video

=]

Cute Boy!!

[CyclosFasciatum]

Damn I was comenting during the video and the coment was huge but I lost it!!!

I'm so depressed right now!

Sorry Jordan! :(

[tracyxoxo]

you are SO cute

[livelaughkristen]

you have no idea how jealous i am of all that snow

orrr maybe you do?

i hope you thawed out okay! it looks really cold there! lol

btw this is the longest video i have ever watched on youtube...time well spent

[volnessj]

dud you don't want this. Cold weather is so not enjoyable. You have no idea.

[livelaughkristen]

haha well i guess if it snowed everyday i would get sick of it, but i've barely gotten an inch of snow this year..

i just want a snow day lol

[OddlyAppropriate]

dont worrie your creativity will hit you again :)

[letsgorc]

hahha maybe i should get that dog a leash

[spricket24]

this was adorable!

[volnessj]

that's because i was wearing your adorable underwear. Whoever wears them become adorable.

[seaottersoup]

I'd love to walk in the snow with you sometime. You could talk. I'd listen.

[jabazzy]

I HATE poop lying around and damn hypocrites! ugh but such cute bunnies everywhere make up for it, somehow!

I want moar Jordan & don't eat those damn berries!

[volnessj]

hahaha did you seriously sit through this jasmine? I didn't think you had it in you.

[jabazzy]

Don't ever question my love! Of course I did and enjoyed every damn minute.

[Zaafy123]

maybe you got your camera fixed? :D

MAYBE I watched all of this video

MAAAYYBEEE I love your dog, Dakota / Makato

MMMAAAAAAYYYYBBBEEEE I will assasinate that hypocrite for you??

people who usually make videos this long bore the shit out of me, but you pulled it off !! :O

[bexterdreams92]

I'm not actual sure why i managed to watch that through to the end, but you're a little bit special aren't you, i guess that's why =] x

[CreaturesThird]

Maybe the creepy gay bully was just trying to say he was soarry to you by pretending to be you because in reality he loves you but he doesn't know how to feel those feelings that people feel he shouldn't be feeling...and he wanted to tell himself through telling you that gay people don't have to be gay because baby jesus hates homos..jews, pokemon, and that one guy who fought for civil rights. I don't know what I'm saying, ever. Cute mountain lion btw. :)

[volnessj]

hahah i loved every word of that comment.

[famousony0utube]

fuck that, you don't need creativity. just pop on the blond wig and talk dirty to guru 2-3 times a week

[Poggylot]

It just ended :(! Noooo!

That was an awesome vlogishness thing :). I actually love your work.

You're right, one a week isn't enough! Make more slave boy :)!

[jazzw0rth]

OMG.... I saw this pop up on my subscribed things and I saw the length and my jaw dropped and I was like "my god, it's so long"

and then I said "that's what she said..."

lol

Jeez, i didn't know you lived in the fucking wilderness.... and there are probably pedos in that white van....

love you jordan

[volnessj]

haha i don't live in the wildernest. But I do live next to a dog park that has a mile of trail surrounded by trees.

I love you too jazz

[jazzw0rth]

what are you talking about? there's like trees for miles.... it's like that movie The Strangers could happen where you live...

I'd be shitting my pants if I lived where you lived.

[blumentopf443]

hahaha love it ^^

[blackanesian]

ima watch this all when i have the time!

[dbm8938372]

Did the van take you away, Jordan?

Did the pretty white van take you away?

=P

[volnessj]

and then the men in the van gave me some hot sex

[dbm8938372]

WOOHOO!

The white van's a-rockin'!

You best not come a-knockin'!

Were they big burly hairy men Jordan? Huh? Maybe they saw your xtube vid, and wanted some more of that!

[tj4justice]

Ever thought of disciplining your dog so that he will stay right next to you:?

[volnessj]

nope! He's not my dog. He's my brother's, and I love him just the way he is.

[MarvelousMartino]

When you went into your maybe rant, you sounded like Whoopee Goldberg (sp?) :D

I love her. :]

Also this is on fucking long video but it was hilarious. Bravo. I wathed the whole thing and It made me happy in the face. ;D

[volnessj]

i can't believe how much possitive feedback i'm getting. I thought you guys would be pissed and tell me to stop wasting your time. Hahah i love you guys!

It's because you're wonderfully interesting and everyone wants your babies

:].

By babies, I mean video.

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