Kelly Crane jingle singer from 80's dallas studio session

[thevoguetheatre]

wainbow bwead is my numba one <3

[drtascam]

She's very talented. I would be interested to know what she is doing now.

[Trevorinla]

She's good! I wonder if she still does this.

[kcrane51]

INCEST SURVIVORS OF THE WORLD UNITE: STOP THE PATTERNS THAT LEAD TO ALL KINDS OF VICTIMIZATION. I'M WITH YOU IN SPIRIT. - KELLY CRANE

[gofuserect]

kelly crane rox the bread commercials

[dinnorparty]

what in the hell is a patty cake?

[Glinkaism1]

White girl trying to sound like a big mama. :)

[osinski37]

I don't know if it is the really Kelly Crane who commented below but...

She doesn't sound, act or behave like a "retard." IF she was 17 while doing this, she shows more poise than any 17 year old I ever met. She is singing a difficult song,trying to sync it to tracks, using at least three different brand names, is respectful of the conductor and works hard at it. She does a respectful and good job, has a great voice, and clearly wants perfection. The 'lisp' is in the imagination of nitwits.

[edyken77]

@osinski37 it's not a lisp, a lisp is an 'sss' sound. She is saying bwead. And wainbow bwead. And fwesh bwead. But yea she's still classy and professional.

[DriveInFreak]

That;s funny...suddenly I have this urge to eat a slice of bread for some reason.

[blondeeagles]

fesh bed

[BlueFlashProductions]

Over a year later and this song still queers me.

[kcrane689]

INCEST SURVIVORS OF THE WORLD UNITE: STOP THE PATTERNS THAT LEAD TO ALL KINDS OF VICTIMIZATION. I'M WITH YOU IN SPIRIT. - Kelly Crane

[mrblondee]

I love this. It's hypnotic and she has such an amazing voice. 

[MrForsakenBacon]

CAYAKE!

[whelkbeam]

I had this stuck in my head all day at work! AAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!!

[electronbabies]

I think its kinda cute :)

Don't sue this guy! Ride this shit out and make a new version of this song!

[theodosiusng]

This is BRILLIANT. So, so, so brilliant. I have watched this over 5 times now.

[patrickbnj]

Kelly, are you familiar with the television show Tosh.0? This is as perfect a "Web Redemption" story as I've ever seen.

[kcrane689]

Hey, to anyone who had anything positive to say, I thank you!

My previous post was a response to a negative post that was

up - And certainly I'm going to defend my 17-year-old self, as this video was IN NO WAY authorized.

Cheers.. - Kelly Crane

[learnworshipguitar]

@kcrane689 Kelly...having done jingles singing myself...I know how it is when you are trying to catch the feel right out of the gate...takes a few goin at it to get your groove...great job! You sinning jingles? You found your moment near the end...nicely done!

[kcrane689]

Hmmm...I was seventeen..isn't everyone a retard at that age??

I guess we'll find out who the REAL random retards are that are posting this crap when I sue your ass. - Kelly Crane

[kcrane689]

WOW - outtakes of me on what I remember as a bad day when I was SEVENTEEN

YRS OLD!! Who do I sue first?? - Kelly

[stupidjunk878]

she's hot

[HunterMann]

Patty Cake? ha! It's too bad that many jingles are now being outsourced to session singers in Thailand and the Philippines. It's all about the money, and they do it super cheap. Bummer. Even radio jingles for Mexico are being done in SE Asia. Nothing is sacred.

[wirefx1]

I love it! You had to sing back in the days. No auto tune here!

[jhbdfbksdhgfjldsnglg]

a very soulful voice,could not find anything else with her.

She could do arenas .

..if she still sings.

very nice looking girl

[wannawatchu66]

@jhbdfbksdhgfjldsnglg Yes, Kelly's a very pretty girl.

[kslo95]

Great voice!!

[salvae]

I thought she was black too...wtf..ruined it for me!!!

[destroyhiphop]

Wainbow bwead, it's fwesh bwead, believe me! Hilarious!

[Bookwirm]

My dumbass boyfriend made this shit his ringtone. lol

[AudioInjectedSoul11]

@Bookwirm haha

[Bookwirm]

rofl

[teenfl]

Thank you so much!!!! What a chance to get back in time! :)

[jett303]

When i listened to DV I thought she was black

Jigoo

[jewishhorse]

haha same here

[jewishhorse]

with the pastor manning mashup made by corey lol

[icebloomafoo]

I think we all did. XD

[v00deux]

I know, right?

[lautour]

she has a wonderful natural voice but she strains a lot. I do enjoy listening to her though.

[tedd4u]

Loved this so much the first 3 times through. Got lost in it. Time #4 I suddenly wanted to SMASH something.

[mrblondee]

If you're missing the brilliance of this, I feel sorry for you.

[ChaztheWeasel]

Oh don't you worry, I've been listening to Distorted View since December. If I found it entirely intolerable, I'd have deleted the April 1st episode.

[cbird66]

Go Kel Kel...drop me a line some time.

You're missed.

the monkey man.

[IdyllicMinuet]

Gotta get me some.

[dittohead21]

Thanks Timmy for the hours and hours of patty cake that play over and over in my head.

[JusticeWayne]

is this bwead still for sale? cause you gotta get me some....

[Chimerah]

What? She was a whitey all along? D:

There goes my fantasy.

[scsors]

Yea Chimerah I thought she was black as well

[keefahholt]

Been listening to her on Distorted View for months and thought she was a big black woman. Guess not...

[Gitemstevedave]

Just like I did Rick Astley.

[limeginger]

she's a writer.

[akspa420]

Any links?

[limeginger]

nope...but the last anyone heard she was working as a writer.

[jdiddy1973]

Wainbow Bwead!

[GregPollard]

Yeah i heard this on DV first too

[torrobinson]

same!

[kurukq]

now im all confused, which bread is your #1?

[limeginger]

...is that true or are you making a weird joke?

[SoloHero]

lol it was just a weird joke.

[limeginger]

lol - she was a friend of mine a few yrs after this - not someone whose name would end up on a stall

[aokifumiko]

Patty cake....PAAAAAAAATTY CAKE

[Cornswalled]

I didn't know rainbow bread was part of the gay pride movement. Now that you point it out it makes sense though, especially since no one outside of gay circles knew the rainbow was one of their symbols, it was still a secret symbol back then, like the Freemason's hand shake.

[BTTHEBAND]

Spread the Distortion.

Distorted View Daily Podcast

[Cornswalled]

What does THAT have to do with this jingle anyway? Is it because both support the gay agenda?

[BeckenBocker1]

has anyone ever avtually heard of patty-cake rainbow bread? appearently, it;s good and it;s bread!

[isqfan]

"Tongue-reduction surgery-- Gotta get me thum!!"

[icebloomafoo]

i can't believe she's white!!!

[TheCheshireLion]

I used to love this shit when I was a kid. If you want to sell anything to kids just blast it with food colouring.

[schwartz0]

I want to eat this and never poop again.

[Cornswalled]

That's not how biology works.

[purpleskyuk]

I used to date this girl back in 89.

She actually doesn't have any lisp or speech impediment, she just sings like that for this particular session.

She did a lot of radio jingle sessions - a great voice.

[limeginger]

It's true what you say "She actually doesn't have any lisp or speech impediment."

But you also say you dated this girl in '89 --i.e., 20 years ago. Your profile says you're 32 now. So 20 years ago you would have been 12. I know who she dated in '89 and he wasn't 12.

[davisneves]

wow. work it girl.

[gumpish]

Yes, you filthy racist.

[RyanWebb304]

This video made me laugh so hard I wet myself. A pretty good looking blond girl with a speech impediment singing like a fat black women. Classic!!

[Andimia55]

It's goowd bwead!!

[rebster35]

Where is she now???? Seriously - she was my friend when we were kids.

Anybody know?

[wforzo]

I, too, have watched it multiple times, inexplicably. She is beautiful and sings her ass off about fucking Rainbow Bread. So surreal.

I think we all love her. Where is she now?

I certainly believe her: it IS fresh bread.

[KiIIerTofu]

Damn that's a catchy jingle. Very Polite Vampires FTW!

[charlierahl]

distorted view, thanks a lot tim!

[Fkdls]

PATTY CAKE!!! GOTTA GET ME SOME!!

[SoloHero]

I have this song stuck in my head now.

Beleeeeeve me it's gooood bweead.

WAAAAINbow bwead!!

Curse you, Tim. Curse you straight to H-E-double-hockey sticks >:(

[utterlove]

Jigoo!

I think I'm addicted to this song :C

[Xinghoa]

I listened to the whole april fools distorted view episode.

Wainbow Bwead was the best part.

[tfranklin]

Can't

Stop

Watching

This

[stalzz]

It is pretty damned addictive, huh? You have to applaud the jingle singers because they have to sing it over and over and over and over and over...and then she has to change the name of the bread for the market from Rainbo to another company.

[badbobbyhughes]

best part of this is that they obviously kept it rlly cold in the studio. im tellin ya, a freakin woodpecker could perch on those nips!

[badbobbyhughes]

hahah thats a hilarious double meaning. i first read it as the way you intended

[badbobbyhughes]

maybe she's related to the abbot from Princess Bride "Maiwage... maiwage, is what bwings us togetha"

[lumbanator]

I'm a professional muso and work in a music studio. Now I'm not an expert on singing techniques but I've never heard any singers deliberately mispronounce the letter 'R' for 'W'. If it's a singing technique, it's obviously not popular for a reason. I think that Kelly has some great chops I just don't think that the mispronunciation of the letter 'R' sounds good.

I just wish I lived in Dallas so I could try some of this great tasting bread.

[sarahkasapna]

y'all i'm pretty sure the pronouncing r as w thing is on purpose. it's a singing technique.

[edyken77]

It's gooood bwead you know that it's bwead bwead...

[mrblondee]

I can't stop watching this. You rock Kelly!

[stickiepants]

this is hypnotizing.

"kelly, rainbow bread!"

[brithgob]

That wasn't even her fault -- they played the wrong backing track.

[kevdude]

The first time I saw this video I don't even know how I watched it. And for some reason, I keep coming back to watch it again

[crapo87]

She's probably thinking, "I attended The Juilliard for THIS?"

[erfmufn]

I think she sounds pretty damn good actually. Really soulful sound, she sounds african american.

[lumbanator]

I don't even know what to say. I watched all of it and thought that I'd wasted 7 minutes of my life... then I watched it again. I can't believe that they'd get a girl to sing about bread when she can't pronounce the word correctly. This is just about the weirdest thing I've seen all year.

[thoughtcrimer]

what is this i don't even

[emilyalamode]

4:45 is the best part of the whole video! That poor girl really had no idea just how "preserved."

[edyken77]

It's easy. 'Pweseweved'

[jaweeNok]

I cant believe watched the whole thing.

[mst3kanita]

Why is this video so addictive?

[branflakes0909]

the speech impediment + singing is entrancing

i love this, hahahahhahaha

WAYNEBOW BWEAD!

[pokersanjuan12]

so who is it

[MartyTregnan]

That's great stuff

[dodgeball303]

If she didn't have that wicked lisp, she would be a great singer. She can really belt.

[oaklandmax]

It makes me want to buy that bwead, although I am not sure if it is made by Colonial or Kilpatric bakeries.

[stevepiers]

This is possibly the funniest thing I have ever seen.

[chewielogan]

i also love her

[LuLuAtFakenessBlog]

I worship this.

It's like Groundhog Day.

[djpancake]

kelly clarkson?

[OriginalG516]

Raaainbow Bweeead

[RandomFella]

I'm pretty sure I'd go completely insane singing that over and over. I guess that's what makes her a pro and me a Youtube commenter.

[langdodave]

i love her

[glenbabarnicals]

Is 'Rainbow Bread' a euphemism for something?

[IBTarasso]

Bwwead ... really?

[sinceyoudied]

ha - i just noticed that! 

tewwible...

[hymiehymie]

What a star!! I never heard that jingle, though, which is as it should be. Too painful to watch the whole thing - I've been through too many "re-takes" in my life.

[OfficeMercenary]

She missed her calling, as I am sure she could win American Idol, especially with the douche bags thaeyhave competing on this curent season.

[brownmarkfilms]

I think I'm in love.

[belizando]

wonder if she's still working?

[DeanHoff]

THE ANSWER from Johnny Hooper:

"That session was done at Goodnight Audio in Dallas, Texas sometime in the 80's.

The singer is Kelly Crane, the daughter of pianist Freddy & Lucy Crane that worked in the recording business here in Dallas. The producer who is is talking to her is Kenny Sutherland, who did a series of Radio & T.V. ads for "Rainbow Bread".

As I recall, the background vocalist are Carolyn Brooks, Debby Hooper, Johnny Hooper, and some others that I don't remember." Thanks Johnny!

[JingleCollector]

The funny thing is...... I probably have the mix-down reel from this jingles sitting in a box in my warehouse. I should look for it when I'm sorting through reels......

Oh... and Lucy Crane sang for PAMS with a soulful voice in the mid-sixties...... and there's even a cut with her name in it from THE POWER OF LOVE package.

[cbird66]

Lucy, Kelly's Mom, still sings now and again...quite soulful and singular. She did an album with Hank Jones about ten years after this...

Kelly has a great voice and grew out of the lisp(?) She also happened to be an acute and well regarded writer-she went on to get a poetry degree from Sarah Lawrence.

I believe she moved back West, though I haven't heard from her in some time.

Yankee.

[Aspergian]

Do you know about Lucy Crane's involvement in the double album from 1980 by Don Zimmers and Charlie Whitaker titled Christmas Love? It was something only available from Neiman Marcus stores at that time.

[Aspergian]

Side note: The album was a production of Winsome Music, BMI. Houston Lighting & Power Company (now Reliant Energy) offered a vinyl album and cassette of alternate takes of 12 tracks from it, which they offered in December 1987 as Sharing Christmas Love.

[toxieboy]

A lot of funky "blue eyed soul" for a bread

jingle. She really lays down some funky vocal chops. She rocks for sure.

[sujinock]

she rocks.

[DeanHoff]

"I hope they don't preserve this on film"

How about video?