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From: CrissReviews
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  • Yeah,even in the games Umbrella is a bit of a "What would Hitler do" kind of a company.

    So really,the movie does the story justice in this aspect.

  • 0:37 The movies based in a game ALWAYS sucks.

  • Eastern European chicks are sexiest hands-down! Fuck American pussy!

  • you look funny

  • Yup, I remember those socks from another popular youtube video.congrats you got them

  • Man... those socks are colorful.

  • I won't even bother with the latest REsEvil. And trust me, I'm a BIG fan of Res Evil 1.

    Haha. And you gotta love the desperation of the movie makers to now suddenly make the zombies to be running zombies. I mean, before you could take a piss, make toast and still club them over the head before they get to you.

    That's why I LOVE (oodles of bliss) Dawn of the dead (2004). It had a zombie baby! How fucking more hardcore can you get?

  • @Domzdream dawn of the dead 2004 best zombie film ever!!

  • @mrlegkick666

    I TOTALLY AGREE! 100%

  • @Domzdream wow, thats a new one a friendly person on youtube!! i didnt think they exsisted lol u sure u dont wanna call me a fag or sum shit?

  • @mrlegkick666

    Nah, not my thing. I'm always friendly to whomever, until they start to be assholes. People tend to forget that it's another person at the end of that keyboard.

  • @Domzdream so true! the more comments i read the less faith i have in humanity lol

  • HAHAHA. Yes. Another huge gripe of mine. The movie was replete with slow motion. I swear. If you fast forwarded throughout the entire movie, you'd get 20 mins of normal speed footage.

  • -flaws. This making her all psycho-kinetic and superhuman was such a mistake. They turned a great horror theme and injected steroids into it. It was reduced to just another shooter/everything-blows up-movie. IE it became B, maybe even C grade.

  • I only like REsEvil1. That movie was done SO well. The rest SU-U-U-CKED! balls.

    And whats' with the thinking zombie in the 3rd ResEvil. The reason why zombies are so creep is because they're lifeless shells walking around. Bodies with instinctive memories IE to feed. As soon as they made it a thinking zombie, they removed the monster from the creature. You could paradoxically say- it was a death of the zombie.

    Also.

    The I liked the fact that Alice (in the 1st movie) was normal. She had flaws-

  • Nice socks and legs for that matter.

  • Well, people seem to think that games are too hard, so if someone makes a movie about them, nobody has to feel that they suck at games! Genius.

  • Well I agree on everything you said. An for those saying I liked them all and I love the games...tell me other then basic elements and some people how are supposed to be characters from the video games does any of these movies really go along with the games or the games stories.

  • I think this is the only movie serier based on videogames that's good. I liked every single one of the movies and I'm a huge fan of the videogames so probaply that's why I like thease movies so much.

    Come on your brains need some junk food too! :)

    PS: Milla is sooo gorgeous.

  • I want your sox!!

  • Goolge Illuminati and movies , it will explain the idiotrecy of the movies today, Its all F2cking mind control, same with the music INDUSTRY!! People just don’t get it or wont accept that they are controlled and programmed by the powers to be

  • I didn't know you reviewed movies too! Subscribed, and loved your take on the whole Resident Evil thing. My son and I watched this movie (and the series), and your comments are so dead on. I'm surprised that you didn't mention the fact that the main characters survive a plane crash into a mountain. That was so slo-mo I think it actually comes to a dead stop in the middle. Anyway, I look forward to your reviews and socks.

  • Lipstick abundance with no suppliers can be explained: either

    • there's a large stash of lipstick Alice deposited somewhere in a secret place when she was younger, or

    • lipstick is grown by special glands in her lips.

    Which one is it? The movie is worth watching again to review every phrase and action to look for evidence. Now, it is clear that it's not for nothing that motion is often slowed down; also, axe-man definitely knows something: he's there for a reason, isn't he? Thanks 4 the hint!

  • life is bitch for some blondie

  • I like how they chose to include unbelieveably faithful interpretations of the characters from easily the shittiest (#5) of the main 5 resident evil games. Except for Chris, mainly because he's not a giant chunkheaded dumbass and he doesn't do a goddamn thing of consequence in this movie. Nemesis and Tyrant this series raped and left in a ditch to die but irrelevant giant axe guy and matrix rip-off Wesker they did to the letter. Thanks a fucking million Paul Anderson, you shit smear.

  • ZOMG! sexy Legs

    I was dissatisfied with all the Re movies, the 1st one being the only half bearable one. I played all the games on PS1 and a couple on PS2 till i lost the thrill.

    When it comes to Zombies I'm a Romero fan, The games were closer to his vision which is horror, the Re movies are some kinda fucked up superhero shit; action instead of horror.

  • Don't worry, it's working. But I don't know if it's related to the socks... Anyway, great video.

  • I don't like that opening question

    It seems to be very harsh toward video games which, despite what is usually popular (stuff like GTA), have a lot of beauty intelligence and craft in them

  • Hey, I'm a film maker/future film maker. And I watch your videos all the time. So I guess it's not all that unlikely after all. Nice review by the way. I'm a big fan of Milla, but yeah, this one was terrible.

    PS

    What happened to your Atheist page? I miss your logical rants.

  • I really hope the "hot chick/people" rule applies. Hopefully that won't exclude me from survival, but I suppose I could totally prove my worth with a finely trimmed beard...

  • yep, i liked it for her too.. i like visually stimulating things about as much as mentally stimulating things... i find beauty in most thing.. likle ya socks lol

    awsum best

  • 1:30 Does anyone else think this dude looks like LatumWay?

  • Your review is spot on. I agree with everything. But "the hotness of Milla Jovovich kicking arse" did rescue this movie for me...but then I've got the hots for Milla something shocking and I'm not quite rational about assessing this movie on that basis! I loved it! But you are definitely right the storyline is shit and the slow motion is merely an opportunity to show case the outstanding poise of the female leads.

  • Nice legs!

  • Best review of this lame flick I have seen anywhere. Period.

    Then again, as hollow as the plot for this movie was (pointless excuse to make a ResEvil movie in 3D), I highly doubt it would have been any better with the original premise of Milla's army of clones going up against swarms of Asia Argento duplicates. Seriously.

  • I'm not distracted by the socks. I'm distracted by the hot legs.

  • Take. Socks. Off.

  • if you want a movie that follows the game watch res evil degenaration ,these movies coulda ben great if they stuck to the first two games but they went some crazy dierection instead.i love good zombie movies but this is not its an over the top action fiasco

  • It's based on a videogame. Movies based on videogames almost always suck.

  • OHHH, . . . forgot to add, . . . . did Alice REALLY blow the complete crop of "Alice clones" on the first raid? There were hundreds of them in the last movie, . . . yet they were all supposed to be killed in the first few minutes of this one??? Oh please!!! :-/

  • I gave a thumbs up, . . . but you can still eat my brainz if you want.

    When I watched this movie, a couple of days ago [yeah, it took me forever to see it, too], I remember seeing this video, so was prepared for all the slow motion. You weren't kidding. And yes, the movie plot was, . . . . "huh???"

    At the end, it concluded with what looks like yet another movie to come. After this one, I could only respond with, . . . "oh, . . .wonderful." Note sarcasm.

    Good review. :-)

  • stop spreading communism

  • Ok I don't remember this movie coming out it April, but it is easily the worst of the series. Plot? What's a plot? And I love Milla Jovovich. I can even pronounce her name correctly. But this movie was a piece of craaaaaap!

  • rofl.

  • hell nar. yer into movie revviews nowadays. do you have a message for the world?

    you just wanna be worshipped like this muhammed guy yer always bashing.

    mila is hawt. hawt chick = good movie

  • hell nar! yer into movie reviews now? do you have a message for the world?

    you just want to be worshipped like this muhammed guy yer always bashing.

    mila is hawt. hawt chick = good movie why bothering about shit like storytelling

  • I loved the first one to, but I do not know why they could not keep up the quality for the sequels.

  • Don't want to seem like a douche, but here are some things that u did wrong.

    1)Wesker wears sunglasses cause his eyes are shining red, he's not a perfect mutation like alice.

    2)The game is nothing like the movie, they have completely different plot. The game has much more to it than the movies, completely different, better plot, more developed characters and etc.

    3)There actually is a plot to this movie, even though it's a bit shallow and not original at all.

    Everything else, I agree with

  • the plot kinda fell in with the last movie, in the last one she stayed to fight and take down umbrella! while her friends went to go find that place or whatever. after life didnt have that big of a plot but the end really gets you thinking on the next movie! I love the games since the first one came out. but still i like the movies its something different not the same old shit

  • never underestimate the power of the internet... because I will admit that at first I thought that she is just some dumb female dog who... uhhh

    she bit me...

  • every time I watch her videos, it's like there is someone(spirit or ghost or something?) telling me that she is a Vampire... a good vampire who quit drinking blood, like a Vegan Vampire (goddammit... I'm being serious)

    just like in Bram Stokers Dracula, she just seduces my mind to obey her...

    ..and just for the record, she is a real good person and she always schools people on right and wrong, like a lady judge(big sister) vampire who needs to be obeyed or no everlasting love for you...

  • I thought the socks were great

  • I didn't think this movie was as bad as some people say. The slowmotion was silly indeed, but I enjoyed it for that fact that its a silly movie. The guy with the axe by the way has no explanation in the game either, so thats pretty accurate if you ask me.

  • Double rainbow!....... socks....

  • Zombiemovies are just awesome, just as your socks

  • I love your rainbow socks! I had a pair once but they died years ago.

    I agree with you the plot of the movie sucks for the same reasons. I've wondered that about these movies too. You see them with make-up and they look normal like the world hasn't ended. It's just hollywood glaming up the zombie apocalypse.

  • rainbowwwwwwwwww

  • You should review Scott Pilgrim vs. The World, that would be interesting.

  • Do a review on a move unstoppable.

  • You worry too much!

  • It's workin'.

  • Actually yes, your rainbow coloured socks and in particuar your sexy legs were distracting me.

  • This is funny -the leg vamp. I won't be seeing this movie.

  • Hey Criss, you should see and do a review on a new movie called Skyline. If you think Afterlife was bad, wait until you see that one....LOL...and the ending...oh brother..

  • RE: Afterlife sucked so bad !!! My husband was snoring next to me in the theater and I was ready to eat someone's brains myself. Preferably the producer's.

  • It's copied scene for scene from RE5

  • Love the legs

  • hahaha awesome, if only the movie was this good

  • Cant stand the game... but enjoyed the movie... hence the need of a video game movie... I hate films that are based on games but don't copy said game format!!!

  • I saw this movie and walked out pissed.

    Every word that this girl says about this movie is exactly what I was saying as I walked out with my friends.

    She nailed it right on the head.

  • Sorry.

    "Slight of hand & distraction", don't work here.

    Now you *started* something, *why* are you *now* running away in stupid "witch" socks?

    Come back, I'm about to turn your arguments to *mush*.

  • you're so right LOL at 'who's providing the lipstick' in a apocolyptic zombie world, yet had to watch all these resident evil movies (and games) i just love the genre ,..,

  • Nice legs Kris !!!

  • Yes, more rainbow socks!

    Yes, the movie sucked ass.

    Thumbs up.

  • I saw this movie. Mila is starting to age. The stars in movies are always attractive, but beauty is fleeting.

    The big masked guy with the giant axe in the movie is the archetypal "Castrater". You see an awesome version of him in the "Silent Hill" movie. The castrater is the Father who severes the Mother's illusury phallus, in order to scare the incestuest child back to the real world of duality. Notice how Mila and her female friend defeat the Father instead. They are twins, illusion.

  • haha i like your socks, you make me laugh, in a good way

  • I spent the first minute of the movie screaming at the screen about slow-mo.

    Also, the did the overhead opening scene remind anyone else of Underworld?

  • YOu are 100% right !! The storyline is lame as hell and pointless. But it is action packed !!!!

  • uhm yeah it's working.

    what were we talking about?

    i concur with most of your fans. more rainbow socks.

  • Has anyone made the double rainbow joke yet? Anyone?

  • Too funny :)

    The first Resident Evil is the only one I liked so far, definitely not going to bother checking out this Afterlife one...

    I agree with the slow motion also, has to have the right timing and be used very sparingly.

  • 100% agree

  • DAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA­AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

    now that i have your attention, please review: "Rare Exports" next.....please

  • I was actually wearing very similar rainbow socks while watching this and it was the first thing I noticed :P

  • Yaaaa rainbow socks DEFINITLY work

  • yes it's working :o

  • DOUBLE RAINBOW!!! its a fucking double rainbow!!!! AHHHHH!!!

    ;)

  • @Liverhawk25 We'll never be sure without leaked corporate documents or an inside whistleblower appearing before a Congressional investigating committee. (Saved Criss the cost of transatlantic holiday postage and handling.)

  • great legs should have shoot them in slow motion : )

  • I agree with this review. Im a big fan of the resident evil series, resident evil 2 for playstation is one of my favorites. Resident Evil Afterlife was a huge letdown. And so were all the other resident evil movies. As a fan, I am very dissapointed.

  • i never watched one of them resident evil,not my type of movies,but i see its great actors in it,ali larter,went miller,see if i watch it or not still not my type...BUT hey criss your purple makeup,shirt such match the bed cheat thats cute:)

  • don't bother with video game films there usually shit you may as well just play the video game, I've never seen a good video game film except for super mario even that was bad really.

  • yeah stop the fucking slow motion

  • 3D is way over fucking used. I'm really sick of 3D movies, seriously.

  • The socks did not distract...

    The legs, however....

  • "Eets a r-raaainboooow. . . Wow. . . ."

    I'd like a pair of socks, but unfortunately can't answer the question. :(

    Is there a consolation garment? :)

    What do you mean it's not the late 90s! Then I missed "Touched By An Angel" dammit!

  • Love the socks!

  • less eye make-up and you're beautiful

  • My favorite moment of the hot bag of shit in question is when Chris " I haven't done jack shit up until this point in the movie" Redfield simply rips incredibly conveniently placed xbox of doom off the wall of the HMS Bullshit and happens to choose the correct craft out of the five possible airplanes Wesker could select from to escape in. If he had chosen wrong, he would have killed every remaining human on the planet. Naturally there's no explanation why he knew which plane to put the bomb in.

  • I love your reviews. Keep it up, dear one!

  • hahaha freakin awesome review!

  • Perchance did you ever watch TNT's Monstervision hosted by Joe Bob Briggs as a child, criss?

  • Comment removed

  • cute socks... and i like the accent... are you from new jersey?

  • I completely agree. I actually got angry because I liked the first three movies and then they give us this "fuck you audience - you are stupid" of a movie.

    Afterwards I went back and watched the first three. And I enjoyed them all. So at some point they did have a clue. Then they met 3D and lost every sense of quality.

  • Am I the only one who actually liked this movie?

  • the movies fucked up the whole storyline, they should instead of re-imagining the games they should add on to it. Like the Doom movie, its completely different.

  • the last Resident film was enough.

    i had no intention of seeing beyond a trilogy.

    the premise, storytelling and fresh ideas suffocates in its pants after that. sometimes after the sequel. god i hope there's not a prequel.

    ZOMGits: i love your eye makeup, bracelets and lavender bedspread ; D

    ooh yah and you're cute in those socks.

  • I'd like to see that rainbow in a V shape .......

  • I laughed my ass off when Wesker killed one of his lackies at the start.

  • I was under the impression that the Resident Evil movies were cinematic Rube Goldberg machines whose sole purposes were to eventually deliver brief-but-totally-worth-it Milla Jovovich nude scenes. No?

  • you looks like a blond /x/-tan.

  • how come you have less cleavage than all the other girls on youtube? oh right you have class.

  • Aye, video game movies are a crime against both movies and video games. Especially with the likes of Paul Anderson and Uwe Boll making said movies. Even the freakin' Final Fantasy movie wasn't really Final Fantasy-ey.

    Worst thing is, Paul Anderson's movie Event Horizon was actually really good!

  • I thought afterlife was about as good as any of the others. They all sucked, but apparently not sucky enough for me to not watch them.... :)

    Criss, you socks make me happy.

  • yes now whats this video about. oh yeah movie

  • when you going to make a porno video plz plz plz plz plz plz plz plz plz plzzzzzzz

  • 3D sucks. I hope that stupid hype dies out sooner than later. When I go to the cinema, I don't expect to end up in a theme park ride with stupid plastic glasses over my own glasses, let alone pay extra for it.

  • 1.that slow motion compilation was funny.

    2.LOOK DOUBLE RAINBOW what does it meeaeaan?

    3. I don't get what's so awesome about zombies.

  • You're too Eastern-European for me. But yeah... the movie sucked.

  • Beautiful Christina- Aside from being distracted by the sense of falling in love with you everytime you make a video....

    I see symbolism. There is something coming to surface in ye old ' blood drinking' sacrifice.

    It's only a matter of time before the FDA will put a label on it as 'fortified'.

    BTW:There are nearly 1million children missing per year in the states. 1/2 of which are never found. ?? Don't you know? It's a 'God' thing...complying with the old school of it's origin.

  • the socks worked on me.

    amc's 'the walking dead' is the best zombie story ive seen. and while i cant believe you sat through this movie, i guess even horrible movies need reviews.

  • I'll save my money for another flick.

  • I only noticed your thighs the third time around.

  • Nice sucks... it makes me horny...

  • Can't wait for the Zombie apocalypse...

  • @R3alitySh0ck

    I live in a subdivision of 'entitlements' that sell their aid for anything but survival. Kid's go hungary, knock door to door for food, cps and law are frequent....

    The parent's or mom's and 'Johns' are all crackheads......

    I'm already in hell. If you never seen a zombie, then you've never seen crackheads on a mission to rob, steal, or cheat.....Soulless glossy eyes and all

    -Those Fema camps might not be a bad idea afterall

  • It's like trying to get another cup of tea out of an old tea bag. There's no flavour left.

  • Double rainbow, its so intense!

    This is a movie review or something? All I see is socks, socks, socks.

  • you're awesome

  • The socks worked fine.  So, you watched a movie or something?

  • You in Rainbow socks is better than that movie. By a considerable margin :-)

  • There have only been a few films where 3D was not used to cover deficiencies in the movie. It is now a studio gimmick. Sad, really. They expect people to be so thrilled by stuff flying toward them that they won't notice the film really is not that good.

  • K-rina do you actually play games?

  • It's a DOUBLE RAINBOW!!!!

  • Mission Accomplished, I'm fully distracted by your colorful socks...and gorgeous legs. <3

  • one to miss, then. tanks for the heads up.

  • Can't say that the movie was that bad, but I sure was disappointed, cause the 3rd part was all right and I was expecting something decentish. However, Wesker(the main villain) wears glasses cause he has red, animal like pupils. But ye, the movie was not worth going to the cinemas for. Love the socks btw

  • You're hot. nice socks.

  • Great review Cris. Now treat yourself to the tv series The Walking Dead! There's still hope for the zombie entertainment industry with this! ;)

  • was this movie the reason why lots of ppl got so excited about zombies lately? i was worryed i missed something important xd

  • Ok text was too long but the socks were sexy :P Yeah but he review was done well

  • Umbrella's plan is simple.

    1) Turn people into zombies.

    2) ???

    3) Profit

  • @Prytonis I knew the Underpants Gnomes were behind it all along!

  • oohhh rainbow socks. *gets distracted* lol I really think this 3-d craze is just stupid. They haven't updated how it's done since 50's and you still have to wear those glasses.

  • whenever alice has 2 guns, one is always pointed in some off direction. like a lazy eye

  • 1:50

    DOOM RIPOFF ALERT!

  • yeah so i watched this movie because call me crazy but i LOVE the 3rd one. I never watched the 1st one and i didnt watch all the of the second one. Thinking this one was gonna entertain me like the last one was my mistake. 1st and foremost at the end of the third one there was clones of Alice...like hundreds of them. Am I REALLY supposed to believe that they ALL died at the beginning? Like Alice didnt have no back up plan? and now shes powerless also...wtf?!

  • Umbrella Corp's possible business plan: turn people into zombies and sell them brains.

  • It would have been more distracting if you’d done that without the socks.

    What do they have against wearing sunglasses inside, anyway?

    I love how we keep getting all these comments from people going on and on at length about just how much they dislike these videos they can’t seem to stop watching.

  • Umbrella: the worst business plan, ever. This movie looks like a darkened version of "The Matrix." Which is bad when everybody wears black.

  • Nothing in this movie made any sense. But Milla was just so danged hot.

  • Sometimes slow motion is very effective. Imagine seeing Criss walking in those rainbow socks and then taking them off, all in slow motion. That would be cinema gold. Criss, you should wear a different pair of sexy socks like that for each movie review, I mean it is so hot, like wow. It would be great to see you wearing a Christmas theme//design next time. I love you Criss.

  • After seeing the first couple of seconds of this video I rated it a 10.

  • double rainbow?

    What does it mean?

  • Comment removed

  • Your legs are unbelievable. I can't believe how intelligent AND hot you are without being airbrushed.

  • no, no... the "socks" where great distractions.

  • Umbrella must have some killer benefits, since their employees still come to work AFTER the zombie apocalypse. Are they paying them in canned goods and shotgun shells?

  • The bracelet toss at the end was the best part of the review.

  • @Thesterness It was like I was really there!

  • hey, explain how alice survived the helicopter crash after being turned back into human?

  • @SuperAtheist people survive crashes all the time

  • @trapper393

    the helicopter crashed into the side of a mountain and she was completely unscathed.

    a human would not have survived.

  • You dont need the socks to be distract ... oooh pretty colors, um, where was i?

  • " I DIDN'T HEAR SHIT U SAID PAST U AND THOSE SEXI FUCKING SOCKS....! =PPP SERIOUSLY THOUGH.,THE USA ECONOMY IS FUCKED....AND THE MASSES OF AMERICANS NEED OUR DIVERSIONS.,I.E. OUR DRUGS,ALCOHOL AND OUR FUCKED UP VIOLENT MOVIES..."

  • You look especially beautiful today!

  • It seems like it was trying to please two audiences, but pleased neither.

  • i just come here to see this comment

    kos aomeeek :D kos aomek kos aomeek

    hope you understand that Rainbow bitch bahahahaah

  • Double rainbow socks all deh wayyyyy...

  • @lostineuphoria Damn it, you beat me to a double rainbow reference.

  • @GoblinXXX

    And I beat him to it.