You might be a Redneck Muslim...

[George4943]

1. You refine heroin for a  living, but you have a moral objection to liquor. You may be a Muslim

2. You own a $3,000 machine gun and $5,000 rocket launcher, but you can't afford shoes. You may be a Muslim

3. You have more wives than teeth. You may be a Muslim

4. You wipe your butt with your bare hand, but consider bacon unclean. You may be a Muslim

5. You think vests come in two styles: bullet-proof and suicide. You may be a Muslim

[BigDJuggalo420]

@George4943 if you think that is actually funny...you may be an idiot

[titodelibero]

Massaallah.. very ins-pee-ration-ale feed-dee-yo. ^.^

[AkageBishonenComplex]

Arrahu Akubaru... /// ~

[thespeez]

(translations, cont.)

Takbeer=blessed celebration (?)

Bismillah= In the name of God

Reversion=conversion to Islam

"Allah Akbar"=God is Great



[Romarinho89]

people have to understand that this is not a made up thing , i am a Hillbilly muslim and most of my brothers are ever Hillbilly or Redneck muslim , black and white and yes hunting between magrib and isha is fun . may Allah bless WV and bring provision(Jobs , Jobs , Jobs) to the people of the Appalachians , for verily the Appalachians are suffering.

[Romarinho89]

people have to understand that this is not a made up thing , i am a Hillbilly muslim and most of my brothers are ever Hillbilly or Redneck muslim , black and white and yes hunting between magrib and isha is fun . may Allah bless WV and bring provision(Jobs , Jobs , Jobs) to the people of the Appalachians , for verily the Appalachians are suffering.

[mindylinky]

@Romarinho89 lolol rednecks muslims

[4strokesarejokes]

@Romarinho89 so your a redneck terrorist

[mindylinky]

hehehehe

[ThLuckyOne]

This is inCREDIBLE! THANK YOU for this wonderful post. Now, I'm just hopin' we can get 'em to start pronouncin' it as "Yeeee HAHHHHH!" instead of "jihad". I think I need a beer....

[michaelispan]

Ha ha ha This had me ROTFLMFAO!

[fkxp]

boy o boy that was great love the humor and yes 10 out of 10 and i did get it thanks ommtalel

Thanks for uploading this Gem

Take care now

[Sekhubara]

The great thing about the USA is that only here (and maybe Canada) will you find someone both redneck AND Muslim. Salaam y'all.

[thespeez]

@Sekhubara - I think this goes to show that the sit-com "Little Mosque on the Prairie" could come to us here in the 'States as (for lack of a better term) an offshoot/variation retitled as "Little Mosque in the Heart of Dixie"! Have it situated in Alabama (of course) and feature an immigrant family who own an auto shop, are fond of race cars and/or motorcycles, hunting, shooting and country music; own at least one F-250; and all in all do their best balancing faith and culture.

[blortner]

@thespeez That's kinda been done before. 'The Beverly Hillbillies' was one of the dumbest series to ever hit the small screen but it made lots of cash.

[mer2wali]

LOL

[ommtalel]

hillarious!!!

non muslims wont get it

but its hillarious

[thespeez]

@ommtalel- once you educate them they may get it. I'll offer translations as best I understand: Dua='non-ritual' prayer Jummah=Friday prayer service Eid=Generally means a certain festival, but ususally refers to Eid-Al-Fitr which is the holiday that marks the breaking of the fast after Ramadan Wudu=ritual washing before prayer kufi=pillcap hijab=women's headscarf haram=forbidden halal=permissible fitnah=discourse imam=prayer leader (minister) Qur'an=Muslim holybook mosque=Muslim temple

[Machhour1]

lolz

[LekiiLekii]

haha that was great