Retsupurae Mario Statistics

[b1bIs1337]

pretty bad vid if all they can bag on this time is his beard.

[FireButts15]

Dat neckbeard.

[bummfire]

ALPHA AS FUCK

[shockraid1]

The man is an orb!

[MitchZer0II]

Something tells me this guy works at Mojang now.

[bust2007]

Counting how many times you got laid you .... None

[SoldierSunstar]

The crazy thing is this Retsupurae got me to subscribe to Griffinlobster.

That's the power of the Colbert Bump, I guess...

[KantorekBaumerB14]

@SoldierSunstar i do that with nearly every person that I see being retsupuraed, I can't explain it.

[BrimstoneLandscapes]

EVERYTHING THE LIGHT TOUCHES IS OUR KINGDOM.

[exxmodel]

everyone involved with this video is fat

[lobsopdoy]

Holy shit, the top of the guy's head is exactly the same as the bottom!

[PlayMadness]

You know, this might be a silly concept for a video, but this guy isn't really too bad. He seems to know what he's doing, and be pretty proficient at the game.

[Chromeizone]

Does he shave his face and leave the neckbeard or does it naturally grow like that?! Ugh! Beard blasphemy!

[TheFatestPat]

It's like he's wearing a brown chain chomp as a helmet

[MarthMcPancakes]

Never have I been more ashamed to come from Illinois.

[EDT3themonkey]

ive seen this guy at walmart

im scared

[Judgementxxx]

@EDT3themonkey run before he pulls out boring stat.

RUN!!!

[EDT3themonkey]

@Judgementxxx the sad part is i saw this vid and thought wait where have seen this guy............FUCK MY LIFE

[haloboy330]

I kinda like this guy.

[TonyBranston]

Stop using product placement in your RPs.

[Scinoid]

As a resident of Illinois, I can't help but feel personally responsible for this thing

[KKoserYaks]

@Scinoid Same here.

[zzyzx0788]

@Scinoid I share your pain...

[ChairmanDrekXXA]

I've seen his channel, this video of his just seems to be an oddity, not the norm for him. He's not a bad LPer.

[thedude2734]

Who the hell would be stupid enough to do somthing like this, but still its funny to laugh at!

[danceswithswords]

I swear...the moment the guy flashed in I yelled, "WHY THE HELL IS CHRIS CRINGLE FROM "SANTA'S COMING TO TOWN" DOING A MARIO LP?!"

[DyeTalian]

The guy seems okay enough. I mean, he sounds friendly and talks in a friendly manner, but........man...........that neckbeard is just distracting me.

[DemonLogos]

AWESoME BEARD!

[Mettaler]

This guy really takes his LPs seriously....

[Insertnamehere31233]

I don't know why, but something about this guy just makes me wanna like him. Neckbeard or not, he just seems like a nice guy.

[DenOfVipers]

@Insertnamehere31233 He seems like a decent guy, he's just powerfully boring and did a boring thing. We all make mistakes.

[CaramelAnt]

That beard and his hair make it look like a bear is giving birth to him.

[SQUIZZLER24]

The guy in this video is almost *exactly* what I imagined proteus to look like...

[momoandmiz]

"Here we see a neckbeard in its native habitat..."

[matsuomasato]

WOW! A realife prime example of a Neckbeard!

[pznecho009]

what he hiding in that forest on his face

[WhiteTiger225]

0:42 Mitch Hedburg came back from teh dead and joined Retsupurae?

[TheJinxrr]

@WhiteTiger225 I now permanently imagine Ironicus wearing rose colored sunglasses and having longish hair.

[SandoraElite]

Holy fucking SHIT at that beard. Good god how does he go out in public?? He must have no self-respect. (Or he just never leaves the basement.)

[EponymousKid]

There's nothing to say to this. Nothing I could possibly type right now could make this any more ridiculous.

[B1k0u]

I don't think that's a beard. I think his hair just grew all the way down to his chin.

[Cloaytonem2]

Statistics make you smart.

[Sakani17]

Wow he finished it a day before by 14th birthday. THANK GOD!

[yoshimasterleader]

does anybody have a feeling he did this for school in some way

[DreamKing2]

@Gremlinz234 These guys are not knock off, especially since they are a branch of retsupurae. Slowbeef even appears on some of these. By the way Retsupurae has done the same thing that was done in this video. Why dont you go troll somewhere else.

[yunikage]

this man gives a bad name to beards everywhere

[squidmod]

BOOMER!

[CleaveTheDragon]

It took him a month to beat Super Mario Brothers 3?

[FireJigglypuff2310]

One time he tried to shave. His beard ate the razor and asked for more.

[TheToast7]

Why are people so obsessed with getting p-wings? Clouds are far better, IMHO.

[dyamalos]

Only 21 videos? He did better than RavenRage at least.

[DrMarilynFan]

He looks a lot like Richard Dreyfuss did back in the mid-1970s.

[killakid879]

boring

[DrMickster]

I am going to have razor burn for the rest of my life.

[Dankore]

Wait isn't Falstad dead?

[KisiroKitsune]

@Dankore I'm not sure whether I should laugh or feel sorry for myself for getting that joke.

[pyramidheadkitten9]

MURADIN?! WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING HERE?

[blader09111]

@Aceclade haha2cat.png

[MyChemicalBromance]

No matter how deep you hide it in hair, you still have two chins.

[DayBreakization]

I didn't know Hot Diggity Demon did Let's Plays.

[StrictlySegaAmerica]

I have a friend who goes to University of Illinois, when I go up and see him, I am going to find this guy and ask him to please quit making videos

[MissMurderElzbth]

Was I the only one that gagged when I saw his face/neck beard?

[Shutup9100]

@MissMurderElzbth Nope

[kuaieq]

DEM FUCKIN DORFS MAN

[wwwwwllllllllllll]

how can u guys b so bad at doing a retsupurae? its really not that hard, especially when u get lp gold like this ):

[Thanatos0123456789]

well, i liked his psychonauts lp. But maybe I just like psychonauts. Yeah, probably I just like psychonauts.

[jmr48080]

It looks like his face is inside a bear's mouth.

[Garedfosho]

Hey, I was stuck in that beard for a long ass time. And thats no awsome Adventure....Think i saw some crabs.

[Yenehckcid]

I keep thinking Bob Ross is going to walk in and use this guy's beard to paint a forest.

[UberRusty]

I got so bored from the source video, I decided to play the sleeper hit platformer Psychonauts.Not on Gametap though, so I guess I lose.

[McFisticuffs]

I take pride in grooming my beard and keeping it trimmed and nice-looking, but this makes me want to shave it off anyway.

I mean fuck, he looks eerily like me if I got lost in the wilderness for a year.

[Cythrin]

Wild Snorlax used Yawn!

Audience became sleepy!

[LowEndLem]

Oh GriffinLobster....Your neckbeard is massive. Still a decent LPer, though.

[criminal90210]

The most important part of an LP... is the STATISTICS. Yes, we all need to delete our LP videos and start adding some statistics at the end of them.

[Unknownhero1423]

What the hell?Is that Bear Hugger from Punch Out?

[cpatrick824]

I got so bored watching this video I wrapped the cord of my headphones around my head and played with the nearby stapler.

[pyramidheadkitten9]

who the hell has a beard like this?

i mean, if he didnt have the beard, he wouldnt look that bad, but , but i mean SERIOUSLY! hillbillies have better facial hair!

[Myrmidon51]

Why is a shaved orangutan doing a Let's Play?

[EdmacZ]

Super Mario Bros. 3 is SERIOUS BUSINESS.

[pyramidheadkitten9]

@EdmacZ

RULE ONE: WE DONT TALK ABOUT MARIO BROTHERS.

RULE TWO:DONT TALK ABOUT MARIO BORTHERS.

[Iainlid]

its like the neck beard is trying to eat his face

[mdb9784]

wild snorlax appears.

[steveharley0345]

@mdb9784

Snorlax used YAWN! Its super effective!

Viewer falls asleep!

[munkyboywndr]

It's people like Captain Not-Even-A-Neck-Beard here that make me never want to play videogames again because I'm afraid I'll start cataloging what I do in them.

[EATshitanddrinkbleac]

I'm even more ashamed to live in Illinois now.

[DenOfVipers]

Did he really think people would care about this? "I got three mushrooms one time..." I compulsively barked, "Shut up, you dork," without realizing it.

Careers...in cataloging what you do in Mario 3!

[squidmod]

How the fuck does this have 4 stars, not 5?

[Cawby]

I never actually beat this game on the original cart so I had no clue about the "new game+", in that small bit at least he was being informative for me.

Besides that, yeah he sucks, good job, lol.

[maddash24seven]

Is this guy OCD or autistic?

[frontrowcrew227]

@maddash24seven

Yes

[CommonChild]

That's great, and actual on purpose fucking neck beard.

[Krbyfan1]

Something in the back of my head says I know this guy... I just can't recall it.

[Urdailywater]

Oh my god he reminds me of me. I feel so ashamed to have that face.

Please dude, get fit.... you're making me self-conscious. =/

[AlecJBrooke]

He works for Mario Associates.

[psycotigerman]

Man fuck when that fat guy popped up I almost knifed my screen lol.

[Physhi]

I screamed when it happened.

[psycotigerman]

I mean that's screamer 2.0 shit

[Icerama108]

I think you'd be able to tell who commented first if you go trough your comments list.

[ThemeMusicC]

To be fair, P Wings are pretty neat.

[NamratsTheStarman]

Good lord! His beard is a sine curve!

[havvyweponsman]

10 minutes of pure, unadulterated Asperger's

[Gamiac]

God, just make a friggin' extra screen and put the stats there, don't talk on and on about how many mushrooms you got. I wish his face didn't look almost exactly like mine, minus the beard. At least I go to the gym, though. I doubt he does.

[NamratsTheStarman]

I think this guy needs some help from that guy who helped make WiI Fit possible for Americans.

[EthVortexShield]

Helped? he MADE wii fit possible for americans.

[REVULSIVE]

"He's so cool he just l- Blast from the past? Really?"

That makes me laugh every time.

[Jesusmanga82]

Exhibit A: Neck.

Exhibit B: Beard.

[Jesusmanga82]

I think extra dumpy Gimli is a pretty cool guy. eh kills goombas and he doesn't afraid of anything.

[fox13at]

I love how in a single through process Roy went from an aggressive defender of the neckbeard to "Oh, sorry I dissed you guys, you're cool. Please let me keep watching your videos!"

[Roykidsego]

Hey. I never said that Ratsupurae was bad. I just felt that this is one guy that doesn't suck, and unless I am mistaken, they usually make fun of crappy LPs.

[Lindaar]

There's a reason this video was chosen. This is a fucking blog entry. This isn't an LP video and no one gives a shit about how many P-wings you picked up when you were playing the game.

[Roykidsego]

Agreed. But did you notice that it wasn't that funny? That is why there wasn't much to laugh at. Also, notice how this has 4 stars instead of the usual 5.

[Dreader92]

Holy crap! That guy looks like me, only shorter hair and red hair!

[Mysterious0Bob]

Are you sure you want to admit you look like that... thing?

[sirwerddhater]

jesus quincy christ is that a grizzly bear that was trained to talk?

[Ukiby3000]

Mr. Brian Wilson, is that you?

[GUInterface]

that fucking beard jesus christ

[hvylobster]

next i will be lping psychonauts, a game with a main character whose tiny body and huge head mirror my tiny head and huge body

[joesomenumbers]

Dear Mr. President I write to you today on an important matter: People making fun of other people playing video games on the internet, please put your top man on this ASAP

[cerxpas]

wow, he looks like he's wearing a retard helmet made of hair.

[xthemusic]

No prob on the Brooker stuff. It is pretty damn good.

And yes, i would stay away from the LP stuff. Far away >_>

[ScaredHelmet2]

He has one of those faces that you can turn upside down and it looks like another face.

[EdinaFryer]

whoa man there sure are a lot of real angry comments in this here comment section

u mad

yea u real mad

[GmodAddict]

Oh my god.

As soon as I spotted the "ILLINOIS" T-shirt on the guy when he showed his face, I started raging. He's making the whole state look like a bunch of chin-bearded fucktards.

[carefreew0rld]

and this is how statistics affect a RANDOM NUMBER GENERATOR!

[zrobeast]

Some people take retsupurae-ing too seriously...

[carefreew0rld]

it's like a fat Sasquatch it soo adorable!

[JTazzman]

LOL

Anime fag typical. It's funny, don't cry about it

[k2thaizzale]

I'm willing to bet money that you used alternate accounts to give your own comment multiple thumbs ups.

[orangenorth]

Ummm, you do realize that they're joking right?

[NamratsTheStarman]

ChippoWai, go look for the No More Heroes thread in the Let's Play Archive, and suck on your own words.

Lern2Google

[untunedguitar47]

You guys DO know that ChippoWai is Chip Cheezum... right?

[NamratsTheStarman]

Naturally, it was SAID in the NMH LP. It's fun to make these guys puppet to me though.

[ILuvSauce13]

@ChippoWai you kind of contradicted yourself there. you asked "who the fuck makes fun of people on the internet like this?" and then you said they fuck themselves and called them gay. Now either you're not very smart with context or you're just some kid who randomly spews out words and see if you can actually get some attention.

[MattHubris]

@ILuvSauce13 ChippoWai is Chip's alternate troll account, lol.

[ILuvSauce13]

@MattHubris lol i fail.

[Hokori]

SERIOUS BUSINESS.

[Sarcasmitron]

These comments are hilarious. I just can't believe an army of youtube sycophants will just descend upon a comments section in unison like this. Its so sad.

[whazoo123]

eat poop!

[darkmindedsith]

Amen.

[shotgunbadger]

Dude I don't even know where to start, but 'haha look how wrong you are' sums it all up.

[sonicfeet]

Are you implying ugly people on YouTube should kill themselves?

[NamratsTheStarman]

They ARE Retsupurae. Slowbeef has acknowledged them. It's collaberative. Reasearch before fucking up.

[NamratsTheStarman]

Well, there has always been a thread for Retsupurae on SA. It's been archived, now, so you need an archive account to access the topic, but there were links to multiple "splinter" Retsupurae groups in the topic post.

[KissMeImPunk]

Do you have to have an account on there to amke retsupuraes?

[NamratsTheStarman]

Not really. But the bulk of good retsupuraes come from SomethingAwful. And don't expect recognition from the big cheeses.

[carefreew0rld]

yeah... if you have a SomethingAwful account you'll probably get more recognition, i attempted it and got like 60 views tops? also it sucks mainly because it's a solo RP...

[carefreew0rld]

pretty much yeah, just 2 different guys though, still just as enjoyable :P

[sonicfeet]

"I cant handle anyone elses opinions on anything I like if its different"

Your comment in a nutshell.